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Rating
15+
Chapters
34
Words
79,709
Characters
Slughorn, Sirius, Lily, James, Regulus, Lucius, OC
Primary Relationship
Sirius/OC
Secondary Relationship(s)
James/Lily, James/OC, Other Pairing
Genre(s)
Drama, Romance, Angst
Era
Marauders
Advisory
Mild Language, Mild Violence, Scenes of a Mild Sexual Nature
Story Reviews
887
Status
Completed
First Published
2007-12-28 1:45pm
Last Chapter
2008-02-21 9:36am
Last Updated
2008-02-21 9:36am

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Ch. # Chapter Title Word Count Reviews
1 Slughorn surprises

Ava Christensen was the kind of girl that no one ever saw. She was smart and actually quite witty, but her absolute terror of being noticed and laughed at kept her from showing this in class or anywhere else. She could have been pretty if she’d had more confidence, but nothing was as lacking in Ava’s personality. She kept to herself always, was quiet, shy, and reserved, and she wasn’t at all certain if anyone of her dorm mates even knew her name. She managed to stay unseen und go unnoticed with astounding efficiency.

1,858 27
2 Favourites

Sirius Black. Ava didn’t know him at all, and yet she had never quite been able to find him nice. He was handsome in the extreme, far more so than James, and she knew that. Sirius, with his longish black hair falling elegantly into his fathomless grey eyes, his tall body, very muscular for a sixteen-year-old, high cheekbones, and casual-arrogant vibe, was the fantasy of every girl in the school. But he knew it – he knew it all too well. And while James was confident and easy-going, Sirius was haughty and arrogant, knowing what he wanted and very used to getting it...

1,532 25
3 A very lonely Christmas

She whirled around and found herself face to face with a laughing James. “You weren’t gonna leave without saying good-bye, were you?”

2,251 21
4 Tryouts and Tears

Keeping that thought in mind, she stepped towards the group, took the broom James gave her, and waited for her instructions.
Upon seeing that she hadn’t backed down, the others turned their attention away from her again – all except Sirius.

3,174 25
5 Match

And then it hit her. There was a chance that she was going to be a permanent player on the Gryffindor Quidditch team. And the match was tomorrow. Tomorrow, she would play in a Quidditch match.

1,935 29
6 An unbelievable discovery

Ava’s eyes widened.
The dog was forbiddingly large, had a lot of shaggy, black fur, and was lounging on the chair comfortably. It seemed like none of the boys seemed to find it strange that there was a dog in Sirius’ chair, instead they were chatting to the dog quite amiably. 
Ava couldn’t help gasping at the sight, and three human and one dog head whirled around to look at her.

2,952 26
7 Kiss


“I don’t want to be friends,” she said. The words had left her mouth before she realized what she had said.
James had already opened his mouth to reply, but froze. “W-what?”

2,517 25
8 James

She cleared her throat. Under normal circumstances, just talking to a girl who was popular and beautiful, and to whom she had barely ever talked before, would have frightened her, but not now. She was the girl who was going to Hogsmeade with James Potter – what could possibly scare her?
“Lily?”
The red-head looked up. She smiled, surprised but warmly, when she saw Ava. “Hey Ava. What’s up?”

2,139 24
9 Lily

Lily gave a hopeless sigh from beside Ava. “I just don’t get this,” she said desperately. “I know you’re busy, Ava, but Herbology is just not my strong point. Could you help we with this one question?”
Ava looked up from her work. “I would, and I will, but I really need to finish this essay first,” she apologized. “Besides, Herbology isn’t my best subject either.”
“I’ll help you, Lily,” came James’ voice.

2,665 23
10 Full Moon

She tumbled to the ground, her vision blocked by a mass of filthy grey hair. The werewolf’s growling was loud in her ears, its foul breath fogging her brain. She could see its bared teeth, big, yellow, and deadly …
And then the werewolf was suddenly gone. Its weight was whisked of her so suddenly she took a moment longer to register she was free. Panting, her body trembling, she rolled over.
There was a big black dog crouching in front of the werewolf, growling. Its fur was shaggy and long, its eyes intensely grey.
Sirius.

2,658 22
11 Starting over

Remus smiled knowingly. “Yeah – you and Sirius.”
Ava shot up from the chair so fast she threw it over. It clattered to the floor. “Sirius? He’s … he’s arrogant!”
Remus just grinned as if he knew better, and it infatuated Ava extremely. Her voice rose angrily. “He’s stuck up, he’s rude – I can’t stand him!”
Remus didn’t seem impressed at all, the knowing smile still on his face. “The best ones always start that way,” he said simply.

2,873 22
12 Friends

She shouldered her bag and left the Great Hall. Outside, she stopped for a moment, and leaned against a wall, closing her eyes. She couldn’t believe how easy it had felt, talking to them … to James after their awkward phase, and to Sirius, after never having talked before …
“Ava?”
She flinched and took a quick step away from the wall. Sirius was standing in front of her.

2,857 21
13 Unpleasant surprises

Adjusting the strap of her bag over her shoulder, she came around the corner to the Fat Lady’s corridor, and found herself facing a very unpleasant scene.
James and Sirius were standing shoulder to shoulder, facing a fifth-year Slytherin she only knew by sight – greasy-haired, creepy Severus Snape. She had never particularly liked him, but what Sirius and James were doing seemed unfair.

2,091 22
14 Family stories

"...Things were … a lot different between us then. And then there was that day when you suddenly started talking about starting over, and don’t take this the wrong way because I’m so happy you did, but I still can’t help wondering … why the sudden change?”

2,510 20
15 Loss

Sirius went extremely pale. “Y-yes.”
Something about the way Sirius was looking at her was very suspicious. He seemed guilty, angry with himself for letting something slip, and slightly scared.
“How?” she asked quietly, somehow dreading the answer.

2,664 26
16 Regulus Black

The next morning in Charms, the now vacant seat beside her that had always been occupied by Sirius, was taken by Regulus, who seemed to find nothing wrong with this. Settling into the chair comfortably, he smiled at her.

2,315 23
17 Date with Regulus

Ava furiously wiped a tear from her eyes and swallowed tightly, forcing herself to get up. “He never really existed,” she whispered to herself. “The Sirius you thought you knew never really existed. No use crying over it now.”

2,950 25
18 Losing grip

“Well, last night … the kiss …” Regulus made an understanding noise as if he had been waiting for her to bring it up. She sighed nervously. “What did you mean by it?”
Regulus shrugged. “I thought that was obvious.”
Ava waited.
“Look,” said Regulus. “I like you. I think you’re smart and funny and sexy, and I like you. And if you don’t know what I meant by that kiss – well then how about this one?”

2,350 24
19 Sirius loses control

“I – I’m on my way there… I was just finishing up some work.”
“Ah,” said Sirius, and he took another step towards her. She could see his face better now, and he was clearly seething. “All by yourself?”
She bit her lip, hard. Her heart was beating frantically.
He knows.

2,394 32
20 Phil

It hadn’t snowed this year – just like last year, which had seen Christmas come and go without the tiniest bit of snow – and the house stood dark and forbidding in cold, grey surroundings.
The inside was no different. Large and certainly incredibly expensively furnished and everything, but cold and emotionless. Ava tried hard not to think about what she had once heard about a home’s aura being defined by the people who live in it.

1,659 27
21 Christmas ball

“Do you have any idea what you’re doing?”

2,171 26
22 Caught

Her eyebrows knitted together, she put her hands on her hips and glared at him. “What are you trying to say, Regulus? That you won’t allow me to break up with you?”
Regulus’ hand slid down her arm and she shivered. He smirked smugly. “Precisely.”

2,098 22
23 Black holidays

Phil just smiled. “Phil is merely concerned about his masters. But Phil understands that what happens in this house is sometimes hard to be talked about.”

3,112 20
24 Sirius moves on

Ava felt her heart stand still. Surely she had seen wrong. She must have. Sirius didn’t have a girlfriend. He had never had one. Although girls were standing in line trying to get his attention, he had always let them down.
She tried to breathe calmly and collect herself. Of course she’d seen wrong. There was no other explanation for it.

1,693 24
25 The truth

So she helped herself with a trick Sirius had always used when wanting to steal food from James’ plate, a trick that had always worked, no matter how many times he did it.
She turned around on the bench, stared out of the window, her hand clasped tightly around the bottle of serum inside her cloak, suddenly pointed to the wall with her other hand and screamed, “Merlin, look – what is that?”

1,990 23
26 Padfoot returns

She felt hot tears rolling down her cheeks and swallowed, closing her eyes.
And then a low sound reached her ears. A familiar, comforting sound. The soft pounding of paws on the grass …
Ava’s eyes flew open, and she raised her head.

3,018 27
27 Discoveries

Ava folded her hands in her lap, staring down at the floor. “But I think … I think I’m in love with Sirius.”

2,467 22
28 Decision

“Absolutely. Look, Ava, you can’t go on like this forever. You have to talk to him. Just tell him that you’ve been experiencing strange feelings lately, and find out where he stands.”
Ava took a deep breath. “Alright,” she said slowly, “that sounds easy enough; I can do that.”

2,337 31
29 Wrong decision

It is funny how absolute, certain determination can crumble within a second, how new-found strength can just evaporate into thin air in a single moment. But sometimes life has a funny way of making people go a long way to reach something, and then just ruining it in the matter of a few seconds.

2,326 32
30 Farewell

They smiled at each other. And then they both turned, and walked in opposite directions out of the train station.

1,830 26
31 Sirius leaves

James’ and Ava’s eyes widened simultaneously .The person’s voice had been filled with so much pain, so much terror, that it was almost unrecognizable. But only almost.
They flew down the staircase.

1,802 21
32 Summer

A very serious mistake, since propped back on his elbows, black and slightly wet hair messily surrounding his unbelievably handsome face, he made her thoughts swirl, her brain cloud, and she felt herself almost bursting with the need to do something, something that would undoubtedly ruin their friendship forever …

1,809 28
33 Lily and James

“Are you okay? You’re looking at me strangely.”
“Hmm…” But he kept looking at her in that indefinable way. Before she could ask, he said quietly, “just thinking …”
“’Bout what?”
He shook his head, as if trying to clear it. “Nothing.”

2,495 34
34 Snow

“I love you.”

2,217 62

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