I almost rolled my eyes. Almost. What is it with people and their stupid sorbets? None-the-less, I scooped up the frozen sugar and handed him the cone. He paid for the pathetic excuse of a dessert and left the shop.

"You told Sirius you'd had a crush on him since first year and Remus that he'd look dashing as a snail."
"I what?"

It wasn't a Gryffindor party until someone got roaring drunk.

Lily Evans just swore.

I need a quill and parchment to document this.

Let me be the first to say Divination is a load of rubbish.

I'm sure I won't be the last.

Because mumbling 'leaky cauldron' into the floo can get you to some questionable places.

Trust me.

 Shocked is an understatement.

You may as well have told me Dumbledore is a woman.

 Maybe I was being overdramatic.

Better than facing my problems, yeah?

 Let me tell you about my life right now.

Basically, it sucks.

 I knew I should be happy.

But I couldn't bring myself to do it.