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Rating
Mature
Chapters
24
Words
87,189
Characters
Fred, Neville, James (II), OC, OtherCanon
Primary Relationship
Secondary Relationship(s)
James/OC, Other Pairing
Genre(s)
Humor, Action/Adventure, Young Adult
Era
Next Generation
Advisory
Contains profanity, Mild violence, Scenes of a mild sexual nature, Substance abuse, Sensitive topic/issue/theme
Story Reviews
85
Status
Work In Progress (WIP)
First Published
2015-07-28 10:07am
Last Chapter
2019-05-23 12:00am
Last Updated
2019-05-23 6:13pm

Track This Story: Feed

Ch. # Chapter Title Word Count Reviews
1 One

“I don’t have any master plans, Maria. Go ahead. Frisk me.” He leaned closer, “You know you want to.

3,350 6
2 Two

“After that, it’s every man for himself.”

“Well that’s the marauding motto, right there.”  

2,483 2
3 Three

 “Don’t mind Lucy, Croaker,” Toby said. “She’s a goblet half empty kind of girl.”

“Oh, no,” Fred shook his head. “The goblet’s contents are irrelevant. The real question with little Lucy, here, is: Is it on a coaster?

3,049 2
4 Four

“Regardless of what’s behind that door, you’re going to open it, aren’t you?”

“It’s locked,” Kelly said, as if James were stupid. Her eyes were glittering gold, “How’s a girl supposed to resist?”

4,182 3
5 Five

“Fred Weasley,” Nick shook his head, grinning. “You are officially the craziest genius I know.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment.” 

2,521 7
6 Six

“We have a plan.” James said.

“Is it a good one?”

“We have a plan.” Fred repeated.

“I feel so safe in your hands, Freddie.”

3,592 7
7 Seven

“Oh, can’t you do it?” Fred moaned, “You know what the steam does to the state of my hair!”

2,654 2
8 Eight

 Fred pushed the trolley whilst James and Toby pulled bottles from the shelves; Fred thinking slyly to himself: nothing says ‘I mean business’ like using a trolley in a liquor shop.

2,443 6
9 Nine

 “You’re very sexy when you’re angry, Tobias Jordan.”

3,351 7
10 Ten

“They’re Slytherins. And they’re boys. This is the epitome of Slytherin Boy behaviour.” 
 
“And yet you are dating one?”

“I find them quite charming.”

“How? They’re idiots!”

4,261 4
11 Eleven

“Weasley!”

“You’re going to have to be more specific.”

2,031 2
12 Twelve

“Don’t make me get out my wand.”

“See, if I said that in a library, it would be seen as scandalous.”  

2,459 1
13 Thirteen

“Anything else I should know?”

“Not whilst you’re sober.”

2,364 1
14 Fourteen

“Raise your hand if you are hungover.”

Forty hands shot into the air once more.

“See, why can’t I see this sort of enthusiasm on a regular basis? It would make classes much more enjoyable.”

2,459 3
15 Fifteen

“I’m under extreme duress! I could go into shock at any moment. Be prepared to sweep me off my feet. I may even require mouth to mouth resuscitation—”

“Or a bubble-head charm.” Kelly interjected slyly.

Or a bubble head charm.” He repeated ruefully. 

2,309 3
16 Sixteen

“Face your fears!”

“Why should I? Fear is a legitimate thing that is there to keep us from dying.” 

2,192 4
17 Seventeen

"They made the Calming Draught because the Draught of Peace contains powdered unicorn horn which lights up an illegal-drug test like a christmas tree.”

“That was a lovely bit of Potions revision right there, Jamie — inspired! — truly — Slughorn would shed many a tear." 

3,298 5
18 Eighteen

“Pink really doesn’t suit you.”

“No? I’ve been told I look rather dashing in this particular shade.”

4,339 4
19 Nineteen

With one eye on the door, Nick did what every Slytherin with access to a teacher’s office would do. He pulled a tube of permanent sticking potion out of his pocket and glued her coffee mugs to her desk and coated the handles for good measure.

Kelly frowned at him. “Is this because you got an E on the essay last week?”

5,841 3
20 Twenty

“It’s illegitimate,” He bopped her nose. “It’s not illegal.”

“Tobias, dear, those words are synonymous.” 

5,682 6
21 Twenty One

Lucy and James exchanged a glance.

Lucy’s said ‘this-will-not-end-well’.

James’s said ‘this-is-gonna-be-hilarious’.

4,289 4
22 Twenty Two

“Everyone knows the minimum number of tiers for a red velvet cake is three!

6,217 1
23 Twenty Three

“Okay. If we’re all quite finished discussing where our parents looked for baby names—” Lucy said, annoyed, “Can we get back to the crisis at hand?”

7,260 0
24 Twenty Four

“Ooh! We can get flakes! Haven’t had them in ages!”

 

“Or we could get a grown-up drink… like grown ups.”

4,563 2

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