Search Home Read Write Forum Login Register
Rating
15+
Chapters
10
Words
19,927
Characters
Filch, Fred, George, Fudge, Umbridge, OC, OtherCanon
Primary Relationship
Other Pairing
Secondary Relationship(s)
Genre(s)
Humor, Mystery, Romance
Era
Hogwarts
Advisory
Mild Language, Mild Violence, Substance Use or Abuse, Contains Spoilers
Story Reviews
26
Status
Work In Progress (WIP)
First Published
2008-10-03 9:52am
Last Chapter
2010-07-23 4:36pm
Last Updated
2010-07-23 4:36pm

Track This Story: Feed

Ch. # Chapter Title Word Count Reviews
1 Prologue

 My anger bubbled inside me. I was going top explode.

And then I did.
 
I wasn’t even holding my wand. Another loud bang erupted in our compartment and I looked down to see Fred and George covered in canary yellow feathers looking like bewildered budgerigars...

Oh yes, this is how it all began...

1,156 1
2 Chapter One: Warning – Do Not Consume All At Once

5 years Later...
Hogwarts loses it's last Sunbeam Toaster...
Harry is told to hide behind a moth eaten tapestry to avoid being murdered by Voldemort...
And some poor House Elf has a real disgusting mess to clean up...

1,675 3
3 Chapter 2 –Sweet and Sour Toad

Ever wondered what type of food Professor Umbridge likes? Chinese take-away or French cuisine? Fred, George, Lee and Violet find out...

2,068 0
4 Chapter 3 – Awkward Situations

The Minister for Magic becomes permanently disturbed for life when Fred and George decide to reveal something through the means of Korean sign language…

1,870 2
5 Chapter 4 – Thy Friends Doth Speak Such As This

McGonagall tries out stage diving...
Hermione reads a controversial book...
Lee doesn't wash his hair...
And Professor Umbridge gets bacon stuck between her teeth...

2,416 1
6 Chapter 5 – The Dream

The Muggle Studies class thinks Shakespeare was on something...
Lucy announces that Yeti's are responsible for global warming...
Violet comes up with a great plan to solve Australia's draught problem using Basilisks...
And Violet has a strange dream...

1,804 1
7 Chapter 6 – Unrealised Realisations

Violet considers whether she has a dysfunctional REM mode...
Lucy gets a new bruise...
Most of Gryffindor confess they are very gay today...
And Lee does something that will confuse Violet for a very long time...

2,387 5
8 Chapter 7 – Tingly Elbows and Whipped Cream

Lee plans to saw Violet in half...
Lucy now thinks Pirates are responsible for global warming...
George is told to elope with Angelina...
And Violet is given a very obscure poem to decipher...

2,112 4
9 Chapter 8 – Flying Carpets and Crumping

Violet rides on a flying carpet....
Mrs Norris is squished by large amounts of metal...
Professor Umbridge is suffocated by large amounts of rubber latex...
And Fred wears some really tight pants...

2,923 5
10 Chapter 9 - Sponge Cake and Guineapigs

Umbridge has a lion shoved on her head…
Some Hufflepuff is doing the Hokey Pokey to Madonna…
Ron is wearing a very frilly pair of knickers…
And Lee tells Violet something she was so NOT expecting…

1,516 4

JOIN HARRY POTTER FANFICTION


Get access to every new feature the moment it comes out.

Register Today!
Need Help Writing Your Fanfic?

Write Your BEST Fanfic EVER In Our FREE 10 Day Fanfiction Writing Jumpstart Program!

  • Introduce Your Character Like A Rockstar! 🤘
  • Build GUT-CLENCHING Suspense 🔎
  • Drop into an Action Scene 💥
  • Develop a POWERFUL Romance 😍
  • How to Land an Ending 🍻
  • How To Make Writer's Block Your Best Friend ❤️
  • ...And more!
“The lessons that were offered helped me enormously. Suddenly it was easier to write scenes, imagine them and bring suspension and romance in it. I loved it! ​It helped me in a way other bloggers couldn’t and still can’t.” - Student