Hehe…I was on the edge of complete and total boredom when I wrote this! Please r/r!
The Merchandise that Never Made the Shelves
Heero Merchandise
- Assemble Your Own Missiles Kit: Open, assemble, blast.
- Indestructible Spandex: Even Fort Knox couldn't make a rip! (comes in red, orange, yellow, green, blue, purple, pink, brown, tie-dyed, and classic black)
- Miniature Beam Sabers: For those times ignoring those idiots don't work…
Duo Merchandise
- Scythes: Stainless steel heads that cut like a pro! Made for when you're in the mood for decapitation
- Karoake Tapes: Sing along to classics like; I Left my Heart in the Firey Inferno or Tears of Hell!
- Insta-grow: A cream that if you apply to your skin, causes silky smooth hair to grow instantly! Guareented!
Trowa Merchandise
- Gel: Not any ordinary gel…keeps your hair in a style you like up to hours and hardens it…making it as sharp as knives!
- Circus Playset: Includes a target board, a blindfold, and 12 sharp daggers, ideal for attaching your annoying little sibling and then throwing 12 daggers at…blindfolded!
- Vegetable Soup for the Soul: a collective book that includes such favorites as; If you Give an OZzie a Colony, The Gundam that Could…and more!
Quatre Merchandise
- Steroids: Not just any steroid…enhances your piloting skills and makes you a complete psycho! What could be better??
- Sandrock Boxers: the oh-so-stylish way to go!! Be careful…they might self destruct though!
- Tea: Soothing, aromatic tea…Made from the finest of materials with a pinch of cyanide! Comes in more flavors than numbers!
Wufei Merchandise
- Feng Shui for beginners: Master this art or Wufei will personally come and kick your arse!
- The Chang Collection: Includes two masterpiece works or literature; The Injustices of the World – all the injustices that ever happened…and room to include your own!; and A Man's Guide for a Women; Wufei's advice on how to handle them onnas!
- Portable Dragon Fangs: Carry it wherever you go! Just fuel it up and have matches at your side. Use unsparingly when around braided bakas…!
And now…these exclusive Bumper stickers that had to be removed from the shelves in A.C 185…
Heero's Bumper Stickers
"This message will self detonate in 5…4…3…2…1…"
"Proud Member of S.M.U – Suicidal Maniacs United"
"Graduate of Dr. J's How to be an Assassin Course"
Duo 's Bumper Sticker
"Dent my bumper and I'll be seeing you in hell."
"If you are reading this, you are too close to the car. This message will now try to self destruct."
"Satanic and damn proud of it."
Trowa's Bumper Sticker
"…"
"Silence is a virtue."
"Be all that you can be, in the OZzie Army."
Quatre's Bumper Sticker
"I love you."
"I am of legal age to be driving."
"Pink is for guys too."
Wufei's Bumper Sticker
"A male driver…you weakling."
"Katanas…a man's best friend."
"Chinese…the only justice in the world."
Finished!! What did you think? Please r/r!!