By
Mischief_555
SUMMARY: Giles pays a visit to Buffy's grave.
SETTING: Shortly before Giles leaves for England in "Bargaining, Pt. 1."
DISCLAIMER: I own only the words and the story. Giles and Buffy belong to Joss Whedon and all the other "important people."
RATING: PG for mild language.
Giles never thought he'd find himself there. Yet there he was, kneeling in front of the grave of Buffy Summers, the vampire Slayer.
His Slayer.
This was his first time in Restfield Cemetery since the death of Buffy's mother, Joyce. He didn't even have enough courage to attend Buffy's funeral, too afraid to acknowledge the fact that she was really gone.
Too afraid to admit that he had failed her.
He looked at the gravestone, his vision blurred by the tears that were welling in his eyes.
1981-2001
BELOVED SISTER
DEVOTED FRIEND
SHE SAVED THE WORLD
A LOT
That was the understatement of the century. Not only did she save the world from countless Apocalypses, she had saved him. She had rescued him from a life of mediocrity. From an existence where he was surrounded only by musty books and barely-used potions. Buffy had helped him realize that there was more to life than killing demons and training young girls to risk their lives for the greater good.
He ran his fingers over the writing on the gravestone and sniffed. "Buffy, I'm so sorry. I can't help thinking there was something I could have done. Maybe I overlooked something important. Something that could have prevented this from happening. But I was so damned arrogant, believing I had all the answers. And because of that, you're gone. I was your Watcher, and I failed you."
Giles laughed bitterly. "Listen to me. I sound pathetic. I know what you'd say. 'Live in the now, Giles. You did everything you could. Stop feeling sorry for yourself, and move on.' I've tried, Buffy. I really have. I've tried to move on. I even came close to beliving that the Buffy Bot could replace you. But she can't, Buffy. No one can.
"Quentin was right, you know. You were like a daughter to me. And now that you're gone...I just don't see the point of staying here anymore. Xander and Willow and the others...I think they're going to be fine without me. They don't need me anymore, and that makes leaving easier.
"I think Dawn will be fine. I can't believe I'm saying this, but Spike is taking very good care of her. I think that perhaps, by taking care of Dawn, he's keeping a part of you alive."
Giles stood and brushed the dirt off his jeans. "Before I go, there's something I've been meaning to give to you." He reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a silver cross, dangling form a delicate silver chain. "I had it specially made for you, and it came in today. Someone will probably steal it, but it's the thought that counts, right?" He placed the necklace in front of the gravestone and stepped back.
"Good-bye, Buffy. I'm sorry I failed you, and I hope you've finally found peace."
Giles exited the cemetery, never noticing the blonde-haired, green-eyed woman watching him as he left.