Legendaddy
A/N: this started as a drabble for my other story, Maybe I want the trouble, and it spiraled out of control and became a one shot. Rather angsty. I always had a feeling Robin would understand how hard this was for Barney better than the others. This is just my take on how she might help him out. Reviews are much appreciated!
The hoop is heavy in his arms as he walks away from Jerome. His chest is tight, leaving him breathless. He needs to get out of there, he can feel himself start to hyperventilate as he walks back to the car. Man up Stinson, he thinks to himself, you can't let them see you weak. No one can ever see you weak. The car comes into view.
They all look up and see him approaching the car. Oh boy, Ted thinks, seeing the hoop, doesn't look like it went well. They get out to greet the blonde man.
"What happened?"
Barney falters, unsure if he wants to tell them, "It didn't go so well." He jokes gently and they all see the pain behind his nonchalance.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Lily questions, concerned.
Barney shakes his head and Ted takes the hoop from him. "Come on buddy."
They all spill into the car and robin looks over at him. He stares out the window and she sees the sadness and heartbreak etched on his face. She takes his hand and he glances at her, startled. She just gives him a look and squeezes his hand. He gives her a smile of gratitude.
They drive home in silence.
"Are you sure you don't want to talk about it?" Lily asks him once again as they walk through teds living room.
"I'm fine." He says, smiling at them as if to say, nothing touches me! Because nothing ever touches the invincible Barney Stinson. He glances out the window.
"Hey Ted." He says.
"Yeah buddy?" Ted answers
"You, uh, still want a basketball hoop out there, heh?"
They all say something about his outdoor stripper pole idea but the weight of tonight is hitting him because a kid needs a basketball hoop. They deserve one.
"No, you were right," he says, and then his emotions are out of his control and he's fighting the tears that desperately want to spill out, because he never got a basketball hoop and dammit, that hurts. "A kid needs a hoop." His voice breaks.
They all step forward to console him. Ted puts his arm around him, lily hesitantly grabs his arm. And then the tears spill out because he couldn't keep them in any longer and they fall down hot and fast. He wipes them away quickly but the damage is done. He feels so vulnerable, and it scares the crap out of him.
Robin wants to comfort him but she knows he won't accept it right now, he's too damn proud to admit that he has feelings like anyone else. She sees the tell tale redness of his eyes when he turns around and it breaks her heart because she understands the pain of not feeling wanted.
They leave soon after that, stopping at Barney's first.
Robin gets out with him and murmurs to the others, "Just gonna make sure he gets up there fine." Before shutting her door. Barney gives her a look,"I'm fine Scherbatsky." He says, a confident smirk in place though it doesn't quite reach his eyes.
"No you're not." She retorts. Normally he would have continued to wave it off but he's too damn tired tonight. They walk inside his building in silence. Once in the elevator Robin asks the question she's been dying to ask. "So what's with the hoop?"
He looks up, "I said I didn't want to talk about it."
"You and I both know that talking can be good every once in a while." She pauses and hesitantly grabs his hand in encouragement, "This is me you're talking to."
He sighed heavily, "He has another son. His name is Jerome junior." He bites his lip and glances away.
She reaches out and hugs him without a second thought. He holds on to her and buries his face in her hair. He'll never admit it, but he misses this, the ability to just hold her when he wants, he hates the flutter in his stomach when she touches him, he hates the power she has over him. But right now all he cares about is the fact that Robin is holding him because he keeps the mask of bravado and indifference on almost all the time, but sometimes he lets it fall and let's the real Barney out. The Barney that just wants someone to want him. The little boy who loves too deeply and too much. Her fingers graze his hair and he remembers how much he always loved that. Something about her touch stirs something inside him and the words come tumbling out before he can stop them.
"And when he said that that kid is named after him, it just reminded me that my dad didn't want me but he wanted that kid. Why didn't he want me?" He questions softly.
Her heart tightens because Barney may be a lot of things, but deep down she knows what a good person he truly is. The guy that flew to San Francisco to get his best friends back together. The guy who once planned on going to the peace corps. She sees the little boy in him, who just wants to be accepted. Everyone jokes about how much of a villain Barney is but she knows the truth; he's a good guy who got his heartbroken too many times.
The elevator door opens and they break apart, stepping out into the hall. Once at his door Barney turns to her again.
"Um…don't tell the others about his other son, okay." He pleads.
"I wouldn't dream of it." She answers, smiling at him.
He gives her a halfhearted smile. "Thanks."
"Do you need anything before I head home?" She asks.
You, he thinks, wanting so badly to ask her to just stay with him. But he knows he can't, he lost his chance with her a long time ago. "Nah, I'm fine."
"Okay." She pauses, "And Barney?"
"Yeah?"
"Your dad might of left, but I want you to know you'll always have me, no matter what." She tells him.
His lip quivers but he swallows back the emotions and smiles down at her.
"Night Scherbatsky."
"Night Barney."
She walks away and the door shuts, leaving Barney more alone than ever. Walking over to the bar, he grabs the nearest bottle of scotch and a glass.
He drinks the whole thing.