I never give much thought of how I would die. I think it comes with what I do, what I did. I've seen death. More than I wanted to. Way more. I tried to avoid it. I was… peaceful. Yeah, it seems a lie. A girl, in the army, with gun, grenades, helmet, and bulletproof jacket, a peace person. But I was. Blame on love. Blame on loyalty. Whatever… Blame even the freaking government, that doesn't stop it. But here I was. In the middle of a 'ghost' city. The population, ran. I, searching… Terrorists.

Fuck, I didn't even agree with this. Yeah, they were terrible people, killing innocents… But… They were doing for what they believed in. And, weren't we doing the same? Killing people, a lot innocent lives lost, because we believed something? Because we believed they were wrong? Because we believed doing this… was right, in some… kind of sick way? That doesn't matter. I was here. That was it. Captain Swan. My dad would be proud if he wasn't scared.

My colleague signaled for me to go to the right, he would take left. Gunshots, crashes, screams were heard in the background. I shut it off. I became good at it after all this time. I checked, and walked around, two soldiers behind me. We saw someone running to an abandoned house, and I followed. A second. Was all it take. The guy screamed, revealing his hiding place, and his shaking fingers gripping a grenade. Shot. I couldn't even care. I lowered my riffle, and followed the sound that was worrying me. Cries.

I got to the second floor, and found a woman, with her little daughter, and a boy, nine years top. The boy saw me, and got in front of his mother, and sister, protecting them. I put my gun down, and raised my hands. Peace. Scenes like this weren't rare. Scared families and even if they done nothing wrong, they would be scared of us. We were the symbol of death.

"English?" I asked.

The boy continued to stare at me, well, glare.

"Yeah, yeah" the woman said.

"You're safe now. Can we escort you to somewhere else? Maybe the base or hospital…?"

"Safe?" she asked shakily.

"Yes. Are you hurt? Are they?" I asked eyeing the kids.

"No" she cried, "Please"

She got up, saying something to the boy. He relaxed a little, and started to cry silently.

"Officer Taylor and I will escort you, if that's okay" I said.

"Thanks" she said.

The girl was crying, but the boy too. She didn't have enough arms to comfort both children. I crouched in front of the boy, and wiped away his tears with my jacket's sleeve.

"Safe" I said and glanced at his mom.

She must have transmitted my message, because he nodded. I took off my helmet.

"Captain…" Officer Wright protested. "We have security rules…"

"Screw rules. We're going out, and he won't go without it"

I put on his head, and he gave me a teary smile. Another officer took his helmet too, and gave to the woman. It was for her, but she put on her girl.

"Let's go"

I opened my arms to the boy, and he accepted. I lifted him, and carried him closer to me.

"Take her, and the girl. If anything happens… Just concentrate on getting to a safe place with them" I said to Officer Taylor.

"Yes, Ma'am" he answered.

I nodded, and we got downstairs. I covered the boy's face, when we passed the guy I killed earlier, and I checked around, before running out of the house. That was the most long run I did. Every noise, shot, crash, I heard, I checked the boy and the girl in the woman's arms. We got them with other victims, and she didn't stop thanking me. The boy had loved the helmet, and one soldier borrowed his, so I could take mine back.

When I finally went rest, I flopped down in my bed, took off my boots, jacket, and belt, with gun. I looked at the necklace in my collarbone, and sighed.

"Hey! Jared!" I called another soldier that was playing cards with his friends.

"Yes, captain?" he said mockingly.

"Cut the crap" I said smiling.

"Yes, Bella?" he asked.

"Jake?" I asked hopeful.

"He'll be back in a couple hours. And I think our unit is going with yours tomorrow"

"Oh, okay" I sighed, "Talked to Kim?"

"Yeah. She's worried as always. Says Billy is more though. You and Jake…"

"I'll try call" I said getting up.

After waiting for the phone to be unoccupied, I finally got to call home. I called dad, and he answered in the second ring, as always.

"Hello?" he asked.

"Hey, dad"

"Bella! Thank God!" he said, "How are you?"

"Good. I'm waiting for Jake. He's coming back soon, and we'll go together tomorrow"

"Oh, good. He better take care of you"

"I'm a big girl, with my own guns, dad" I said smiling at his protectiveness.

"Yeah" he mumbled, "Do you have news when are you coming back?"

"No. But dad…"

"I know… You won't come without Jake…" he sighed, "Bella, you there… Won't prevent things for happening. Come home…"

"Let's not argue, again, please" I said.

"Fine" he grumbled.

"Aren't you proud? I'm captain, I beat the men asses!" I joked, "A chick leading them!"

"Yeah, I am proud. You got more far than me"

"Not true"

"I'm chief of police in Forks. You're a captain in army" he pointed out.

"Yeah, but you have a life. A daughter, a son-in-law, friends… Got married, is engaged, a nice fiancée, step kids… How is Sue by the way?"

"She's… fine"

"You're lying. What happened?"

"Seth is thinking about joining" he mumbled.

"The army?" I gasped. "No. If he comes, I'll kick his butt back!"

"Anyway…" he sighed, "She wants you and Jake on the wedding, so… we're waiting"

"We'll be back as soon as possible" I said. "Dad I have to go. More people want to call home…"

"Fine, be careful"

"I am. Tell Seth to stop thinking shit like that. Tell Sue not to worry, if he joins, I'll make sure to send a letter saying how bad soldier he would be. And tell Billy not to worry so much"

"Okay" he said chucking, "Oh, Angela Webber is pregnant"

"Really?" I asked with tears, "Tell her I miss her, and I'll try to get back to see her fat"

"I will" he said, "Love you, kiddo"

"Love you too, dad. Bye"

I went back to my bed, and fell asleep. I just woke up, with someone moving. I opened my eyes, and it was Jake, lying with me.

"Hey. I missed you" I said giving him a peck.

"Missed you too. Sleep, we'll have a long day. Together, thankfully" he said.

"I called home" I said.

"Really?" he asked and I nodded, "And?"

"Charlie is worried, as always, miss us, and asked me to go back as soon as possible. Sue is concerned, Seth wants to join"

"Oh, Seth. That kid is stupider than I thought" he mumbled and I nodded.

"I told her not to worry, we would take care of it if he joined. Hm, Angela, my friend, is pregnant. Charlie and Sue want us in the wedding, so they're waiting… And Jared spoke with Kim, that spoke with Billy… He's worried"

"I'll call him before we leave" he said and sighed, "I'm sorry"

"For what?"

"I know you're here for me. And I won't ask you to go home, again, because I know you're too stubborn to listen…"

"Damn right"

"But, I'm sorry this is stopping your life" he continued.

"It's not stopping my life Jake. It's just a different life, but a life the same. And you're close, that's what matters"

I kissed his lips softly. He rested his forehead in mine.

"I wish… I wish I wouldn't be called in. I wish you not followed me. I wish we were in La Push, discussing our plans for the day. I wish you had gone to college, as you dreamed. I wish we married later in life. I wish our kids would be safely tucked in at night by us…"

"I wish you. I wish this is over, for both of us, and we'll go home, and have the happy ending, peacefully" I said.

A tear ran down my cheek.

"Sorry, I shouldn't have said anything about… kids. You… You said about Angela's pregnancy, and it brought it up…"

"It's fine" I sighed, "Let's sleep"

He kissed me, and we went to sleep. I wish we had never woken up…

"Captain!" Officer Turner said approaching.

"What!" I snapped.

Focus! I need to focus. We were getting surrounded.

"We lost Sanchez!" he said.

I gripped a grenade tighter. Oh my God. I started having flashes of Sanchez's family pictures, wife, kids… Concentration, I need to find it. We parted ways, there wasn't another option. They were more than us. So, naturally, when the time to part came, Jake's unit went away. I didn't like it. I didn't like it, knowing he was in trouble, the same I was, but not knowing what is happening. I told my unit what to do, and we called back-up. They were coming, but we had to handle for at least fifteen minutes.

I have flashes of what happened. I remember shooting people. My people being shot. Grenades thrown. I fell with one explosion, and thankfully wasn't hurt. It was me, and another five soldiers. We were behind a house's wall. I took a deep breath, and looked over the wall. I saw Jared. What the hell was he doing? If I could see him, so could the enemy. My unit joined me, watching them, and soon we were their back-up. We shot a few men, that showed up from nowhere, going to shoot them, or something.

My heart… cracked, I couldn't find another word to describe it, when I saw Jake crossing the street. I followed his gaze, and saw one of his guys with Jared, needed help. Jake was halfway though the distance, when I heard a shot. I gasped. Jake fell in his knees, and gripped his throat. He fell on the ground. At this point, my unit and his started shooting, probably seeking revenge. I just jumped up, and ran to him, ignoring the officers protesting, screaming at me. I fell beside him and gasped with the pool of blood. He was in his side, and I could see the hole the bullet did. In the back of his neck.

"Oh, God!" I cried, "Jake!"

He groaned weakly. I turned him, so his head was resting in my knees. His eyes were unfocused, and he had blood in his mouth.

"Don't do this to me! No! Jake!" I said shaking him slightly.

"Bella" he whispered.

I cried, leaned in and touched my lips to his softly.

"Please, Jake" I cried.

He didn't answer. He never would.

I rested my head in his chest, ignoring people were approaching, and shots were still being made. My world was resumed to this. Lost, love, loyalty, war.

*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*

I stood there, watching men shoot at the air, a flag being folded, people paying their respects. Flowers, hugs, words were exchanged.

I was sent back to US, with a few soldiers from my unit and Jake's, and his body. They expected me to break down. But I didn't. I was sad, of course. I was a 21-years-old widow. But… Why break down, again, if I did some many times already? Why freak for losing a life, that was…. Lived? Everybody dies, but not everybody lives. Jake lived. He did everything. This scared me sometimes. He said a couple times he had nothing to regret, he lived everything he wanted, and if something happened, he could die in peace. I hated when he said those things, because I didn't like to think something would happen. But it did. And I'm accepting, he died peacefully, even in the middle of a war.

An officer in formal uniform gave me the folded flag, and gave me his condolences. I nodded and thanked him. I spent the rest of the week with my family. Billy was devastated, as Rebecca and Rachel were too. I told him what I thought. What Jake said about dying peacefully, and he was a little comforted. I talked to Seth, and he was convinced not to join the army, when his mom broke down with the news Jake died. Leah was… she was off. She never liked me much, but she was totally ignoring what happened, like it didn't affected her. I let her be.

The whole town knew, and everyone I met gave me their condolences, and thanked me for being so brave… Brave? Well, that was a little flattering, considering I cried a lot this week.

After a week in Forks, I had to go. I had a meeting in Washington, with my superiors. Charlie and Seth took me to the airport. I was shot, just grazed, my left shoulder, wearing my uniform, and Seth beside me carrying my bag. I don't need to say I was getting looks from everyone in the airport do I? I said goodbye to them, assuring Charlie I would come back, and not go back to Iraq, now. What he expected me to do? I don't know what else to do? My whole life was about this, and I wouldn't stop it now. I would do everything to honor what Jake gave me, and what he cherished.

"Captain" a flight attendant said with a smile, "Can you come with me?"

I nodded and got up, following me. She got me to the first class section.

"A courtesy, for your services" she said.

I accepted, and the rest of the flight was peacefully in first class. I got to Washington, and went to the building where I should meet my superiors. An Officer greeted me, gave me her condolences, and guided me to the room. I greeted my bosses, and they asked me to sit. It was an open room, with a big table. I was sitting in the middle, with them across from me.

"Captain Swan" Major Barnes began, "First of, I want to give you my condolences, and say I'm terribly sorry for your lost"

"Thank you, Sir" I answered

"I would like to thank you for your services to this country. Your bravery helped not only your unit, but the whole country. And you're an example"

"Thank you. You're being too kind" I said.

"We would like to discuss your future" he said.

"Yes, Sir" I said carefully.

"We think it would be better for you, not to go back to Iraq"

"I'm sorry, Sir. But, it's my job, and I would like to go back to my unit. I leave them enough"

"Captain, we recommend you to settle in US, and we can offer you a position here"

"A position here? As… behind a desk?" I asked, "I'm sorry, Sir. But I'll have to refuse, and go back to my position"

They exchanged worried looks.

"We understand that this is what you want, but you're not fit to work fighting anymore…"

"I'm not fit?" I snapped. "How? Because of my shoulder? It will heal in a week!"

"Not because of your injured shoulder. You lost a relative, and you risked yourself as well, as some of your unit, by walking un the middle of a shooting. You were lucky your unit, as well as Captain Black's, covered you, or your injury could have been worse, and you would be dead"

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. It was true, but… What would I do? I didn't know what to do if not go back…

"The job we got you here is privileged, and we think you would fit well on it" Colonel Hamilton said.

"Do I have choice?" I asked quietly.

"Of course you have. But I should advice… Take a look at the proposal first, and if you don't agree, we can discuss another position for you" he said.

He pushed a folder to me. I sighed and opened it. I read everything, twice. I blinked and read the beginning again. I stared at them.

"You're kidding, right?"

*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*

I was moving in to my new home. Well, more… a room. I still couldn't believe. After that meeting, I called Charlie, Billy and a couple of friends. They also couldn't believe. But… here I was. My shoulder was still hurting a little but I ignored. Today, was an… different day. I got my bags down, and checked to see if I was presentable in my uniform. I think so. I played with my necklace. It had my military tag in it, and a charm to each important thing. My grandma, mom, her death, Jake's, my engagement ring, and the charm he gave me when… I didn't finished that thought. Just another thing I lost to war. There was a knock on the door, and I said to come in. A guy in black suit, and headphone, opened the door. I nodded, and followed me. I received welcoming smiles, as I passed people. Inside was better than the outside. He took me to a room, and I gasped as I recognized.

"Welcome" he said with a smile.

"Thanks" I mumbled.

He opened the door for me, and I entered. The oval room. Yeah, if you thought it was amazing just the fact I was in the White House… The first family was standing in front of me, with welcoming smiles. I wanted to laugh, because I thought I must be like… going insane. But I kept cool. The president… Oh my god, the president of United States… Okay, I'm being silly. I knew I would work here for a week now, and I should have known I would meet him sometime, but… The president walked to me. With a smile. Okay, a gorgeous smile.

"Welcome to the White House, Captain Swan" he said extending his hand.

"Thank you, Mr. President" I said shaking his hand.

"We're glad to have you, for such a boring, but important job" he said.

"It's my pleasure, Sir" I said smiling.

"This is my wife, Esme"

She walked to me, and gave me her hand.

"Nice to meet you, Ma'am" I said.

"You too" she said kindly.

"My daughter, Alice" the president continued.

She danced to me, and gave me a huge smile.

"We're going to be friends" she said.

"Thank you… Hm" what should I call her?, "Miss"

"Call me Alice" she said.

"Thank you, miss"

I insisted on the name, because this was just work, and she was definitely my boss. The whole country's boss.

"And this is my son, Edward" the president said.

A guy, my age, stepped forward, smiling at me. He had reddish brown hair, kind of bronze, and deep green eyes, like emeralds. His smile was dazzling.

"Enchanted" he said politely.

Okay, hm… How do I answer that politely, but professionally?

"Thank you, Sir. It's nice too meet you too, all of you" I said.

There. It wasn't a bad answer. Was it? Oh God. What if I just humiliated myself? I was going crazy working here.

"First of, I would like you to know, I read your history and… I'm terribly sorry" the president said.

I bit my lip, and smiled. I just nodded, and his family looked confused, so I imagine just he knew.

"And… This was a surprise, that's why your superiors didn't say anything…" he continued.

A woman, in a suit walked to him, and gave him a velvet box. He approached me, and opened the box. There was a medal inside. I smiled and he took it, and put on my jacket's carefully.

"Thank you, Sir. I really appreciate it" I said.

There was people taking pictures and it felt a little awkward.

"I should thank you, for all you've done, and all you lost for our country" he said.

I smiled again, and nodded once. He went back to his family, and a few people left, especially the ones snapping pictures.

"As you were informed, you'll be a… body-guard" the president said.

"Yes, Sir"

"You will protect Edward or Alice, but if something comes up, be noticed, you might have to protect me or Esme" he said.

"I perfectly understand, Sir. I will do my best keeping your family safe" I said.

"Great!" Alice said, "Daddy! Can I go shopping now!"

It was weird a seventeen year-old girl calling the president 'daddy', when he barely looked old enough to be her parent.

"Yes, of course, dear" he said.

"Edward is coming too. Oh, and this way we can see how she is" Alice said grabbing Edward's hand and coming to my side.

"Okay, sweetie. Enjoy your day" Esme said, "And look for something I can buy for Christmas for you"

"Thanks, mom" Alice said. "Come on"

"Sir, Ma'am" I said excusing myself.

They smiled, and Alice dragged me away.

"First!" she said after we were away form the room. "Are you going dressed like this?"

"Hm… I would have to unpack, and that would take some time. So if it's okay, I would like to keep my uniform, Miss" I said.

"Alice" she corrected.

"Yes, miss" I answered smiling.

She groaned in frustration, and Edward chuckled.

"So, I'll get changed, and… Meet you in the living room 2, in… fifteen minutes?" she asked Edward.

"Sure" he said.

She ran away, a girl, that I suppose it was a guard followed her.

"Come, I'll show you where the living room 2 is" he said.

"Thank you, Sir" I said.

"You know, she's right. You don't have to be so formal about this. Right, Frank?" he asked the guard following us.

"Yes, sir" he answered smiling.

"Traitor! You should have called me Edward, so she would do the same" he complained and looked at me, "He's just playing. He calls me Edward, so should you"

"I'll have to refuse, sir" I said.

He rolled his eyes, and we entered a large living room. He sat in one of the couches, and turned on the TV. Me and… Frank, stood there, a couple feet away.

"Sit. Make yourself comfortable" he said to me.

I glanced at Frank, and he was smiling. I rather do what he does, and keep my job.

"No, thank you" I said.

"Frank, do you want to sit?" Edward asked still looking at me.

"Thank you, Edward" he said and sat in one of the armchairs.

"See? He calls me Edward. And he can sit. So, do you want to?" Edward asked, "Rest your shoulder…"

"Thank you, Sir" I said.

I looked around, but the other option was the other couch, and it was far away. Edward rolled his eyes and nodded to his side, so I sat in the other end of the couch. Feeling uncomfortable.

"So, I didn't know much about you. And you probably know more about me…" he said, "So… You don't have to answer if you don't want to but… Were you in Iraq?"

"Yes, came home… almost three weeks ago" I said, swallowing hard.

"You… Were there how long?"

"Three years" I answered.

"Three years!" he asked shocked, "But… How old are you?"

"Almost 22" I said looking at my hand in my lap.

"You… You went to war at eighteen?"

"Yes, sir" I said.

"Oh" he mumbled, "You got back because of your injury? It doesn't look that bad… Though it's good your back…"

"No" I swallowed hard, "I didn't come back because of my shoulder"

"Why then?" he asked.

I was so happy Alice decided to interrupt in that moment, because I didn't want to answer that question. We got up, and I followed them to the garage. We were going in two SUVs. I would go with Edward and Alice, and another guard, and in the other car another two guards.

"So, Captain Swan!" Alice squealed when the car began to move. "What's your real name?"

"It's my patent and name, miss. That's what matters" I mumbled.

"Oh, a dedicated army girl. I liked her!" Alice said, "But, come on! What's your name?"

"Just say it. She won't stop until you do" Frank said driving.

"Isabella Marie" I said.

"And what's the B for?" Alice asked.

"Hm?" I asked confused.

"In your uniform. It's I. B. Swan"

I looked down and realized what she was talking about. I fought the tears, and looked away through the window.

"It's my name too" I mumbled.

"But it's for what!" she asked.

"Alice" Edward warned.

"Okay, don't tell anyone… But I'm Mary Alice Brandon Cullen. I hate the Mary. It's so… old. That's why I tell people I'm Alice" she said, "Edward, has a middle name too. If you tell me what B is for, then I'll tell you his"

"Don't" Edward said.

"It's a long story" I mumbled.

"Well, let's hear it. We have the whole day!" she said.

"I don't want to bother you…"

"It won't. We will spent too much time together, and I want to know you" I sighed, I couldn't escape the question anymore.

"B, it's for Black" I said and a tear escaped, "My husband's name" I said wiping away the tear.

"You're married!" Alice gasped. "But… You're so young!"

"And you were in Iraq… How did you get married?" Edward asked.

"You were in Iraq!" Alice gasped. "Wait! Frank stop the car!" He did and sighed. "Drive us to… The Congress" Alice said, "There is a quiet garden where we can talk"

He changed course, and I called the other guards to tell them what was going on. Soon we were parking in the Congress, and I jumped out, opening the door for Edward. It was weird, opening the door to a guy.

"Thanks, you didn't have to" he said as I closed the door.

"Come on! I want to hear it!" Alice said walking in front of us.

Frank and I walked behind with Edward, and the two other agents almost ran to catch up with Alice.

"She's hyper" Edward said as we walked inside the building.

"I noticed" I said.

We followed her to a little garden and just another two people were there, lunching, in the corner. Edward and Alice took a table and we four continued standing. I looked around before accepting Alice's invitation to sit. Well, she was pulling me down by the wrist.

"Okay. So, Isabella Marie… Black Swan, what's your story?" she asked.

"And by the way… Black Swan? Wouldn't be better… Swan Black? Or just Black?"

"Let her tell the story, Ali" Edward said and gestured for me to tell it.

I took a deep breath and started.

"I lost my mom, and went to live in Forks with my dad, Charlie. I met Jake, I was… eleven at the time. We grew up, and started dating. He… He was called. He had to go to Iraq, so he proposed, and we would be engaged while he was away. But I suggested for us to marry before he left. While we got ready to marry, and he leave, I… I got listed. I send a letter, explaining everything that was happening. By some miracle, I was accepted, and would join Jake's unit, after. We got married, and I said I wanted to continue to be Swan, and when he got back we would get a real wedding and then I would be Black. It was a lie. That way it wouldn't be two Blacks in the same unit. Or show we were married. He left, and I got ready for the next three months. I didn't tell anyone, just a close friend, that would go with me to war too. When it was time to leave, I said goodbye to everyone, they told me I was insane, and… Well, Jake thought he had died, or something, and was in some kind of dream or hallucination, when he saw me there. I stayed there three years, with him" I said.

"Oh, that's…" Alice wiped away tears from her eyes, "That's so romantic. You were so brave, to go, for him"

"Thank you" I said.

I was absentmindedly, playing with the necklace.

"So, he's back with you? Or he's still there?" Alice asked.

I sighed and a tear escaped.

"Oh" she gasped.

"You should have shut up, Alice" Edward said.

"Sorry" she said, "Sorry, I… I didn't know"

"It's okay" I said wiping away the tears.

"That's why you're back?" Edward asked quietly.

"Yeah, kind of" I said and took a shaky breath, "Apparently, I'm not fit, because… well, I kind went against the rules when he died, and I can't go back. I would, if I could"

"Why!" Alice asked confused.

"My whole life is been surrounded by this. My mom's death… My dad was called to Iraq a few years ago, but they let him stay, because of my mom's death, and he had to take care of me… Jake… War summon my life. It's what I know. It was my place for three years. Friends are there…"

"You don't have to answer, but… How you went against the rules?" Edward asked.

"It was a shooting. We could loose, there was more of them… But… When Jake was shot, I ran in the middle of shooting, and stayed in the ground with him. My unit protected me, Jake's unit too. But they saw as me risking the units safety, for a mistake"

"Mistake!" Alice snapped, "Help your husband, a mistake!"

"Help… There wasn't help, Alice" I said sadly, "There wasn't anything I could do. So I risked my life, and the units', to something… unnecessary to them"

She hugged me. It took me a moment to recover, but I wrapped an arm around her waist.

"I'm so, so, so sorry" she said and pulled away, "Terribly sorry"

"It's okay, Alice" I said shrugging, "I'm fine now"

She gave me an incredulous look.

"Well, yeah, t hurts, and it's just three weeks but… He died peacefully, and without regrets. He always said that. So… It's a comfort, to know, he would have changed anything"

"You are the most brave woman I've met" Edward said.

I snorted and looked down at my necklace and smiled weakly. Yeah, I guess… Moving on, doesn't seem so hard. I'm making… acquaintances already. Though a piece will always be with me.

AN: Idea came up as I was hearing "Wake me up when september ends" by Green Day. Awesome Song.

Sad story, I know. But it will get better.

So, tell me what you think. Review!

I hope you enjoyed.