The Worst Listener Question
Chapter 3
Aysha: No! Please don't kill him! Let alone wake him up! If you wake him up, he'll kill me AND you.
Chrom: Ha! You underestimate me, ma'am. I could chop him to pieces with nothing but the hilt of my sword. Not to mention, with two hands tied behind my back.
Me: Aysha has a three second orgasm.
Aysha: Yes. I understand that. But please…don't. I'm begging you.
Chrom: I don't understand. Aren't you the one who called for my assistance, crumb maiden?
Aysha: How do you even know that?!
Chrom: Well, I was told my target was a boy. You're a girl, I assume. So that's two people. (Playing Games.) It's not that hard.
Aysha: Don't get salty with me, boy!
Austin: Why are you yelling?!
Me: Aysha panics and jumps out of the close window, despite the fact that the door is still wide opened from Chrom's arrival. Austin gets up and realizes that he is standing about two inches before the end of Chrom's majestic blade.
Chrom: Good morning.
Austin: Whoa! Take it easy…
Me: Austin pauses for a moment, and takes a couple seconds to wake up. He realizes that he is not standing two inches before Chrom's blade, because for that to happen, Chrom would have to be real. (Sorry, Aysha.) Aysha wakes up at Austin's house.
Aysha: Aaaaahhhhahaaxahhh!1!11!
Austin: SHUT UP!
Me: Austin throws a pillow at Aysha, who fell asleep on the floor for some reason.
Aysha: Austin! I just had the craziest dream! And Chrom was there, and you were there, and I think I WAS you at the end, and then I woke-
Austin: I don't care, Aysha! Go back to bed!
Aysha: Hell no! Chrom's gonna kill-
Me: Aysha pauses for a moment to view her surroundings.
Aysha: Wait…why am I at your house?
Austin: You got drunk and started chanting ISIS stuff while snorting bagel crumbs. So I just let you be in your own world until you eventually fell asleep.
Aysha: Oh. Was it cool, at least?
Austin: No. In fact, it was pretty terrifying.
Aysha: Aw, man…
Austin: Oh, that reminds me. I have somewhere to be.
Me: Austin walks out of the house. Aysha secretly watches out of the window as Austin pulls a black T-shirt and mask out of his pocket.
Aysha: *gasp* Oh my god…
Me: Austin puts the mask and shirt on, and gets into a truck with three other people wearing similar apparel…
THE END?