We All Fall Down
Disclaimer: I don't own CSI, it's characters...or anything else related.
A/N: Oh oh! Hmm, this is a follow up…and I really don't know if this was a wise decision in writing one, but...a couple of you guys requested I do a sequel thingy so…
It's best if you first read Let Me Kiss You..
"You son of a bitch!"
The glass that had vacated Sara Banks- formerly Sara Sidle- hand smashed against the tiled kitchen wall, the shards flying in every direction. Hitting the floor they crumbled underneath her husbands feet. Looking from the wall to Sara then to the ground he grimaced and angrily pointed at her.
"You! What the hell do you think you're doing Sara?"
Anger had blinded her vision, her eyes had clouded over, a black shadow now took over what had formerly been the sight of her husband and her kitchen. She reached behind her and quickly moved her hand trying to find something she could throw at the lousy bastard. Gripping the vase she had gotten from his parents as a wedding gift she threw it in the general direction of where his gruff voice could be heard.
She didn't see the vase shattering into a thousand pieces; she heard the sickly noise as the pieces began to flutter to the ground. More crunching ensued.
"Calm down! That was a wedding present from my parents. I said sorry babe."
A strangled cry emitted from the back of her throat, her husband crouching beside the kitchen door looked up to his wife. Her face was contorted in anger and fury, the veins standing out on her pale neck.
"Sorry? You're sorry? For what exactly?" She reached behind her and gripped another glass, the thin stem caught between her thumb and index finger.
"Sorry for turning this marriage into a shambles? Sorry for lying to me? Sorry for taking your wedding ring off? Sorry for fucking one of your colleagues?"
Her soon to be ex husband cowered behind the kitchen door as another glass shattered against the kitchen wall.
"Babe…look, I know it was wrong –"
Sara's gaze had turned steely as she calmed down somewhat, the anger now being vented through her words. "You know it was wrong? Tell me Jordan, if you knew it was wrong why did you do it, all of it? I'm a better person than I was two years ago…because of you I might add. I finally found someone who could love me, I thought things were going fantastically…tell me what went wrong, what went wrong between us that you had to pretend you had work and sneak off to fuck one of your younger colleagues?"
Jordan stepped away from the kitchen door and ran his hand through his blonde locks. Why did he do it? Because he was lonely, hell she was married to her job not him. He felt at times like he was just a project to her, something to work one while she wasn't at work. He stared at her and shrugged half-heartedly.
"Would you believe me if I said I was lonely?"
"Lonely? Ha! You see me every day."
He walked towards her and sat down at their breakfast bar, the soft padding of the barstool allowing him to make himself comfortable, for the time being.
"You just don't get it Sar…I see you every day but I don't see the real you anymore. I see a woman dedicated to her work more than her marriage."
Sara blew the stray hairs from her face and glared at him. "If this is because I don't want to start a family right now.."
Jordan shook his and sighed. "I know you don't want kids right now Sara, we've been married a year…it's obvious. But this isn't about that it's about work. The only thing really important to you."
Closing her eyes she could feel the adrenaline slowly losing its edge, hiding away for another time. How could he do this to her, she was his wife. What was she to do now, it was obvious the marriage was now over, she would never be able to trust him again, and trust is what was needed to have a stable relationship.
She walked to the kitchen cupboard and pulled out a small brush.
"Sara, what are we going to do?"
She blinked, slowly turned her head over her shoulder and said coldly. "First I'm going to clean up the mess I made, then I'm going to go into the bedroom that was once ours and pack my clothes and belongings into a bag."
He looked into her eyes, shock and shame clearly written on his features. He opened his mouth to ask why; before he got the chance she spat out her answer venomously.
"I'm leaving you."
XxXxXxX
LYING IN bed, Gil Grissom tossed and turned, his nightmare – an occurring thing – chilled him to his core. Body wet with sweat, his arms and legs got tangled in his sheets, his broad muscular body flopping around like a rag doll.
He could hear her, screaming for help. Sara's body tensing as her attacker stabbed her repeatedly, in the chest, the stomach, the arms and her legs. He cried out to her, he tried to move but was frozen to the spot as he watched her attacker undo his slacks and rip the little clothing she was wearing off of her pale and bloody body. He was dimly aware of a soft knocking coming from all directions, he looked around and saw nothing, the screaming of Sara brought him back to his senses as he watched the shadowed figure hover over her, ready to rape her. He screamed, he shouted, he wept as he watched what was happening, the knocking now becoming louder, more pronounced.
Help me Gil!
He stared into the brown orbs of Sara Sidle and smiled sadly as her attacker brutally raped her and slit her pale beautiful throat.
Grissom's eyes snapped open as he heard the banging ring out through his silent and empty home. He took in his surroundings, piecing all the information together. It was just a nightmare. The knocking was more forced this time, curious and spooked from his nightmare, he threw on a pair of sweatpants and t-shirt and made his way barefooted to his door.
He was expecting Catherine on the other side, as he opened his door, his eyes widened in shock as he took in Sara's appearance. She looked as if she had been crying; her clothes wrinkled and rumpled, her hair in serious need of a brush. He looked down to her feet and noticed two bags sitting there. She stared at him wide eyed and bit her bottom lip. She looked utterly beautiful in the frantic state she was in.
"Oh God…I woke you up didn't I? I…look it doesn't matter. Go back to sleep I'm sorry for waking you up."
He stared at her for some length of time; her eyes became watery as she looked into his blue eyes. "I didn't know where else to go…this is just a mess…I should go.."
"Sara, I'm just surprised to see you. Come on in." He opened the door wider for her to step inside, before she could lift her heavy bags, Grissom got there first and smiled.
Sara stood in the middle of his living room and fidgeted, it felt uncomfortable standing in his home. The last time they had been alone together was in her house, the day he had asked to kiss her. The day Gil Grissom changed her life.
It was true what Jordan had said; she was married to her work. Her work meant a lot to her, she needed some sort of stability.
Jordan, she knew now, was a waste of space. She had tried to love him, she really had. After the first few months of their marriage it was clear to Sara she did not love her husband. She of course had strong feelings towards him, but thinking back she knew that she had been lonely, he had came at the right time and had made her feel special. She hadn't meant to upset Grissom; it hadn't been her intention to make him jealous. She had just wanted to be happy for once.
When she and Jordan had started dating, he made her feel special. He was a romantic at heart doing everything he could to try and woo her. It had worked. He laughed at her jokes, he listened when she spoke. He had wanted to marry her, take care of her and be there for her.
It had been the night before their wedding that she knew she had to tell him about her childhood. If he knew now, knew what kind of person she was, what kind of person she had been back then and he didn't want her anymore, well…he wasn't the person she had thought he was. But he had understood, held her while she cried over the death of her father, the incarceration of her mother and the loss of her brother.
When Grissom had been in that position, sitting down in front of her while she poured her heart out, he had held her hand. She felt at that moment, when Jordan held her shaking body, his warmth spreading through her that this was the man she loved.
Of course it hadn't been love, it was something strong but not as strong as love.
Grissom slowly and carefully put her bags down and looked at her. It was obvious something wasn't right. The bags had made his heart pump a little faster. It was obvious she had left her husband.
He walked over to her and softly placed his hand on her shoulder, he could feel her trembling through the thick jumper she wore. "Sara…are you OK? You're shaking."
She tried to speak, nothing but a sob escaped from her chapped lips. He put his arms around her and led her to his couch. "Sit down, I'll go and make us some coffee."
She nodded and stared ahead as he began to make them much needed coffee. He hoped the caffeine would calm her down a bit. He watched her as he waited for the coffee to brew; she was upset that much was obvious. Her body slumped as she sat on his couch, her face expressionless. Her watery eyes trying to hide the frustration and pain she felt.
He walked slowly and placed her cup of coffee on the coffee table in front of them. She stared at it for a minute as if it were some foreign object. Grissom sat down next to her on the couch, his thigh brushing hers. Obviously uncomfortable she edged away from him a little. It was obvious she needed space.
He sipped his coffee thoughtfully, watching her out of the corner of his eye. She looked frail and fragile.
"He cheated on me."
Grissom's heart stopped there and then. Jordan had cheated on her? He placed his coffee on the table and turned around watching her. She wiped the lone tear that threatened to fall from her eye.
Anger, rage and confusion were the first of many emotions to hit Grissom. The man who had promised to love her till death do them part had cheated on her, the woman Grissom loved. How could the whelp do something so awful as cheating on his wife? He laid a comforting hand on her knee and looked into her sad eyes.
"You've…left him?"
She slowly nodded and brushed back the stray hairs in her face. "I don't know what to do." Her voice was remorseful.
Grissom stared ahead for a moment, thought's swirling round his head. He had finally gotten what he wanted, Sara…husbandless. He had wanted the marriage to end, he knew it wouldn't last. But now, he felt hollow. Wishing away something that had obviously made Sara happy. He felt as if he had caused this pain, so many nights wishing and wanting had left her in pain. Her bottom lip trembled as she informed him of what had happened.
"He said he was lonely, how could he be lonely with a wife? I was there for him; he was there for me…it stings, knowing he cheated on me. I just…Griss…you don't want to hear any of this, I'm just ranting…"
Grissom shook his head and wiped her tears away with his rough thumb. "You're in pain Sara, you shouldn't bottle any of this up."
Sara looked into Grissom's cold blue eyes, she had missed him. She had missed the close contact; she had missed their conversations at work. She had tried to forget him for the sake of Jordan; she didn't want to forget about him anymore. He was there for her; she was sitting on his sofa sobbing over her ass of a husband. Christ, why had she turned to Grissom? Why didn't she go to Catherine's or Nick's?
Because you need him Sara. You need him right now..
She felt the first tear slide down her cheek slowly, one after another, the tears cascading down her face like a waterfall. She tried to wipe them away, but the moisture stayed there, glimmering in the light. This is was true pain felt like; she had been rejected by the person she thought had truly loved her. Her body shook, her lips trembled, she needed comfort. She was an emotional wreck.
Without a thought she hugged Grissom, her slender arms tightening around his waist. He froze in shock, and slowly wrapped his arms around her. She buried her tear-streaked face in his neck, he smelled of soap and that unique smell of Grissom, manly and musky. He felt so good, his body holding her. If someone had walked into his Town House and found them like that, they would have thought they were in a lovers embrace.
He wanted her pain to go away. He closed his eyes and squeezed Sara; they would get through this together.
TBC
A/N: Oooohh, domestic alert! Well, what did you guys think? I'm still not sure if it was a good idea writing a follow up. Reviews, suggestions and criticisms greatly appreciated.