"Your ongoing faith in the better nature of society continues to be a marvel to me, Mr. Sanchez."

"Now why would that be Ezra?"

"Because there is an overwhelming volume of evidence to refute your contention."

"Guess it all depends on how you look at it." He reached across the desk to pick through the stack of wanted posters Ezra was reviewing. "Now, you take this fellow. Sure, he robbed a bank, but according to the story I heard, he was just trying to provide for his wife and a sick child. A noble intent, you'd have to agree."

"I would agree, if that story had been true. My understanding of the details is that he has no family, and he killed a teller during his efforts."

"Oh. Maybe not the best example I could've picked." Josiah grinned slightly. "But I'm sure he loves his mother."

"Not necessarily a sign of good character, but I admire your tenacity."

Any further discussion was cut short by the sound of gunfire from the street. "Care to wager on the bank or the saloon?" Ezra asked as the two men quickly rose.

"Even money, so I'll pass."

They cautiously opened the door, with Ezra looking toward the bank while Josiah took a step out toward the saloon. Two shots fired just past his head had him quickly diving off the steps for cover. Ezra made a similar leap in the opposite direction.

"They're trying to rob the stagecoach." Chris shouted from his position near the Mercantile. Ezra and Josiah looked at each other and shrugged. "Keep your cover."

"Excellent suggestion Mr. Larabee. You should endeavor to do the same." Ezra could now see there were three riders heading toward the stage which had stopped in front of the Mercantile. Chris's position there was less than secure, and Ezra scanned for the best option to provide backup. That was when he spotted Vin at the window of the hotel attic. A moment later a shot was fired bringing down one of the thieves.

Ezra took advantage of the action to scurry behind the jail and through a small alley to come out close to Chris's position. Chris turned at the noise, but pulled up on his weapon at his first glance of the red jacket. He turned back and fired, bringing down the second thief at the same moment a fourth appeared, coming near to the left of the jail. Several shots rang out, but Ezra wasn't in a position to see what was going on. What he could see was that the third man was aiming at Chris, and quickly solved the problem with a single shot. The fourth, and they hoped last, man called out. "Okay – enough. I surrender. Don't shoot."

"Throw out your gun and move real slow with your hands up." Chris warned him. He and Ezra stood from their cover when they saw him comply, each still holding him in their sites.

"Nathan!" Vin was shouting suddenly. "Josiah's hurt. Beside the jail." Chris grabbed the prisoner and shoved him toward the jail. By this point, JD and Buck had joined them – JD from lunch, and Buck from other activities, as he was dressed only in longjohns and his undershirt. Chris pushed the prisoner toward them. "Lock this bastard up." JD was staring down at Josiah, so Buck took charge of the bastard in question. Nathan ran past all of them to drop by Josiah side.

"Hang on there, preacher." Josiah's eyes fluttered, and he coughed lightly but didn't speak. That sent a chill through Chris. It took a lot to silence Josiah. He was on his knees beside Nathan. "What can –"

"Hold pressure here. We need to get him to the clinic. It looks bad Chris. Josiah, you hang on, hear me?"

It took less than a minute to wrap a pressure bandage around him, then JD, Vin, Chris and Nathan lifted him quickly off the ground, and hurried toward the clinic. Vin heard Ezra say something, but didn't bother responding. The gambler watched as they passed him, unmoving for several seconds. He finally stepped forward and gathered the weapons from the bodies of the three dead thugs before walking back to the jail. Buck was just coming out. "He's locked up. Saying this wasn't his idea. How's Josiah?" Ezra raised his head slowly, looking at Buck and saying nothing. That spoke volumes. Buck glanced back at the man in the cell, who tried to shrink back. "I want to go check on him. Can you stay with this guy?"

"He's locked in. He'll be fine if you must go over." Ezra drop the guns into the desk drawer and locked it. "I'm going to go get drunk," he added before leaving. Buck stared at the prisoner again, debating his move when JD returned.

"Figured you might want to go get dressed."

"How is he?"

"Nathan's working. And cursing. Seriously Buck, it's the middle of the day. Go put some clothes on."

"Love knows no time limits JD. You should learn that." Buck headed to the door. "I'll be at the clinic. I'll come back in a bit to give you a break. And yes," he added before JD could repeat himself. "I'll get dressed."

Ezra watched from the window of his room as Buck hurried along the pathway back to Miss Callie's house, where no doubt he'd left his clothing. Sure enough, a couple of minutes later he was back on the street, buttoning up and rushing to the clinic. The fact that the rest of the team remained at the clinic was the only reason Ezra dared to even hope Josiah was still alive. That hope had faded when he saw Vin coming out, and heading towards the undertaker's. Ezra was certain of what that meant until he saw the young apprentice come out with a wagon to retrieve the bodies from the street. Vin didn't linger, but headed right back to the clinic.

Folks on the street were already talking about the shooting, which is why Ezra had elected to avoid anywhere public for his planned intoxication. It was only after he had closed his door and reached for his flask that he remembered his personal supply was dry. That meant his only option was to head back down to the saloon. He stepped back from the window when Buck disappeared from view. Maybe the saloon would be quiet. It was still early in the day and most of the gossip and chattering seem to be out on the street. It really didn't matter. He needed the drink, and that left him no choice.

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"I've done everything I can for him."

"We know that Nathan. So does he."

"He's a stubborn old cuss. This isn't gonna take him down." Vin hoped he sounded a lot more convincing than he felt.

"Don't know." Nathan shrugged slightly with resignation. "He's been talking about those damned black birds of his again. If he thinks it's his time, he might not fight it."

"Sure he will." Buck challenged the idea. "Fighting just comes natural when it's death you're dealing with."

"Problem is, Josiah can be a rather contrary sort when he puts his mind to it." Chris offered.

"I just came out to let you know. And to find out if anybody else needs fixing?"

"No, we're good. We got us the three dead idiots out there, and JD is standing guard over the last one. He took a bullet in the arm, but nothing critical. It'll keep."

"OK - I'm going back in to sit with Josiah."

"You need anything, you let us know." Most of the men slowly headed down the stairs from the small medical office, with Chris lingering.

"Is there a chance? Any chance?"

"There's almost always a chance Chris. The human body can do amazing things sometimes. But, I don't think even Ezra would place a bet with these odds." He looked around the area. "Where is Ezra?"

"I think he headed over to the jail, or maybe to the saloon."

"He hurt?"

"Don't think so. He mumbled something about there not being enough room for everyone here."

"Ezra mumbled? You sure he's not hurt?"

"I'll check, but like I said, don't think so."

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Ezra headed into the bar, reaching over the counter and grabbing the first bottle he could lay his hands on. The noise brought Inez from the back room.

"I can get you your bottle Senor."

"This will serve the purpose nicely." He pulled out the stopper and drank a large gulp straight from the bottle before slamming it back down. Inez took a step forward, but stopped in her tracks when he repeated the action.

"That will not help Senor Sanchez."

"And there is nothing that will, so this won't hurt."

"On the contrary, I think it would hurt him very much to see you like this."

"Well, he won't. So once again, not a problem."

"Please Senor – Ezra. Please."

"Please what madam? Please don't drink? Please don't be angry? Please accept the fact that a good man is dying while the lowlife that killed him sits calmly not 100 yards from here." Ezra went to drink again, and found the bottle had been drained. His response was to throw it against the wall. Inez flinched, but didn't move.

"Please don't do something you will regret."

"Ah, but I have no regrets. I have no time for them. No need. Regrets are for those with a conscience that guides them. With a reason in their existence. For their existence. Yet again, not a problem." He reached for another bottle, knocking it over. He swept his hand back in anger, knocking several glasses to the ground. He stared at them for a moment, then dragged his arm across the bar, sending more glassware flying. It released the valve, and in less than a minute several chairs lay broken as well, as he stormed from the building.

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"I am not stopping you from leaving Mr. Dunne. If fact, I encourage the action."

"Not going anywhere until you put that down Ezra."

"You cannot expect me to surrender my weapon when there is a dangerous criminal in our midst."

"He's unarmed and locked behind bars Ezra. Don't think you need to be pointing your gun at him."

"I am guarding him Mr. Dunne. As an officer of what passes for the law in these parts, that is my job, is it not?"

"Right now it's my job. And you're kind of in the way. Why don't you go check on Josiah and –"

"What possible purpose would that serve? Our colleagues will notify us of his passing, at which time I intend to be right here to carry out justice."

"Won't be justice Ezra. It'll be revenge."

"'A rose by any other name' Mr. Dunne. But you are free to leave. Our friend in here is safe. He will draw breath for as long as Mr. Sanchez does."

"Like I said Ezra –"

"Leave!" Ezra quietly cursed himself for taking the anger out on the young man. "I am certain you should be informing Mr. Larabee of my actions. He no doubt will have words for me."

JD looked nervously at the gun Ezra held rock steady in his hand, finger on the trigger and aimed squarely at the man locked in the cell. The prisoner was literally staring down the barrel, unmoving. "Yeah kid, go fetch this Larabee and the others, or this guy is gonna kill me."

Ezra grinned with no humour. "He can 'fetch' the entire population of our fair town. It will not matter. They will not be able to alter that course of events."

JD took a deep breath. "Ezra, I need you to promise me something."

"You can ask, but I make no commitments."

"I need you to promise you won't do anything until I get back. You won't kill this bastard, no matter how much he deserves it, until I get back."

"Why should I make such a pledge?"

"Because right now he is my responsibility, and if anything happens, it's on me. Chris is the only one who can change that."

Ezra relaxed his trigger finger almost imperceptibly. "I have no desire to cause you any difficulties Mr. Dunne. I shall, for the moment, make every effort to avoid killing this man. But do not unduly delay your return. I cannot guarantee how long my word is good for."

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"When did a storm come through here?" Vin looked around the saloon at the broken chairs and glass. It was Buck who spotted Inez in the corner, half-heartedly sweeping some of the debris. He started to make a smart comment when he saw the tears on her face. "Who did this? Are you alright darlin'?"

"I am fine, thank you. Or will be. This-" she waved her hand around, "is nothing."

"Nothing my ass. Who did it?"

She looked up with far more sorrow than anger evident.

"Senor Standish."

Buck stared at her in shock. "He gone loco?"

"Yes, grief will do that to a man."

"Shit." Chris cursed. "He did this because of Josiah?"

"He did this because he does not know what else to do."

"Where'd he go?"

"He left. I do not know, but I am afraid of what might happen. He is not himself."

"That's obvious. Leave this Inez. We'll find him and get him back here to fix it."

"I do not care about fixing this – only him."

Chris was about to answer when he heard JD shouting for him. He charged outside, wondering what else could possibly go wrong.

"Thank God," the kid was breathless. "You need to get over to the jail. Ezra – he's gone crazy Chris. He's gonna kill that guy"

Oh. That's what else could go wrong.

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"What the hell do you think you doing Standish?" Chris entered the jail slowly, worried he might startle Ezra into an undesired action. He needn't have worried, as his visit was expected. The others followed in time to hear Ezra's reply.

"What needs to be done."

"That's for Travis to decide."

"Why? We have no doubt as to the man's culpability."

"For robbery yes, for shooting a man, yes. But not for murder."

"He'll die for murdering Josiah. We witnessed that."

"No, we didn't. Josiah is still alive Ezra. You kill this bastard now, and you'll be the one to hang."

"I have no issue with that."

"Well we sure as hell do," Buck challenged him.

"And you can be damned sure Josiah will," JD added.

"Josiah is in no position to make comment."

"You do this, you best hope you're right about that," Vin replied.

"Because then I can be forgiven for killing his murderer?"

"No. Because if he lives to find out what you did, he'll skin you alive."

"And have your guts for garters," Buck added

"Ezra," Chris's voice was frighteningly calm. "Don't make me shoot you."

"That is likely inevitable at this point Mr. Larabee, but will not resolve the matter in the way you are hoping. My reflex will still have me pulling the trigger, and my mission will be complete."

"Not if I shoot the gun from your hand."

"I believe you are incorrect in that assessment, but I understand you are honour bound to make the effort."

There was no movement in the room for a full 60 seconds.

"Dammit! Aren't you gonna stop him?"

"Shut up," Buck ordered the prisoner, "or I'll save him the trouble."

Chris watched Ezra, not so much as blinking, before taking a slow breath and holstering his weapon. He spoke quietly to the gambler. "You were never going to fire, were you?"

"Yes, I was. I am."

"No. Don't think so. Think you wanted to, and still do. But I don't think you will."

The men all let out their withheld breath. Ezra didn't holster his own weapon, but his finger slid off the trigger.

"Aren't you going to arrest him? Throw him in here with me for a few minutes, without that little peashooter of his."

"Ain't too late to change our minds about this." Buck snarled at the prisoner.

"What would we be arresting him for? Guarding the jail is his job. Just being a little over-cautious is all. No crime there." Vin's glare dared the man to challenge him.

Chris gripped Ezra firmly by the elbow and steered him from the jail, guiding him off to the side before tossing him against the wall. "He's right. I should throw you in there."

"Yes, you should."

"If Travis finds out about this, I won't have a choice."

"Again, an accurate statement."

Chris forced himself to calm long enough to take a hard look at Ezra. The man was completely void of expression. This was beyond the poker face he had mastered, beyond the detached persona he perfected. This was a man entirely without emotion at that moment, and it scared the shit out of him.

"I swear, you go from ice to fire and back again faster than anyone I've ever seen. Don't happen often, but boy, it is a sight to behold when it does."

"I assure you Mr. Larabee, I am fully aware of the ramifications of my actions. I can offer no acceptable explanation for the display, and will accept any disciplinary actions you deem appropriate."

Chris stared Ezra down, not so much as an intimidation technique but simply in an effort to try to read him. It was harder than it should've been. For someone who was so raw and open just a few minutes earlier, the gambler was now a blank slate. "Relax Ezra. Nobody's going to be taking any actions. We're all on edge here."

"He deserves to die. I failed in my effort to see that happen. Not a great surprise."

"He's gonna have the trial, and he's gonna swing for what he's done Ezra. That's a guarantee." Buck hoped the assurance would help to break the tension.

"He's not going free Ezra," Vin agreed. "You can be damn sure this isn't the first time these guys tried this, and I'll bet there's plenty of posters out on them. Even if he doesn't hang, he'll never be out of a prison again."

"Why wouldn't he hang?"

"Because so far, we don't know that he killed anybody. You can't be giving up on Josiah like that Ezra."

"This how you react every time a friend gets hurt Ezra?" Vin asked. "Because it's gonna get you in a mess of trouble."

"Yeah. He's right Ezra. It's one thing to go off when it's family involved, but at you can't tell us you do this every time a friend is in trouble?" JD added.

"It has not been an issue prior to this situation."

"Whoa," JD exclaimed. "You've never had a friend hurt like this before? Now that's a charmed life."

Ezra didn't answer, which only fanned Chris's anger again. He was about to lay into him when Buck stepped between them and spoke softly ignoring the others. "You get it's not like that now Ezra, right?" There was no reaction. "Ezra?" The gambler turned his head away, still not speaking. "Dammit Ezra, answer me."

"I am endeavoring to understand the concept."

"What concept? JD asked, completely confused by the conversation. "What's going on?"

"It isn't that he's never had a friend hurt before," Buck began just as Vin finally caught on as well.

"It's that he's never had a friend."

Chris could feel the anger drain away as he recognized what Buck had figured out.

"That the reason Ezra?" he asked softly. "That's what set you off? Damn, it'll do Josiah proud to hear that."

Ezra went pale and finally raised his head to look at Chris. "No." Ezra's tone was almost pleading. "You can't. You must not tell him any of this." He dropped to the bench as the adrenalin finally began to wear off. "Please gentlemen. This is hardly to the time or place to be focusing on my selfish and petty issues. There are far more important concerns."

"We can't do anything to help Josiah right now. But we can sure as shit make sure you're straightened out. Did you hear what Buck said to you? Do you get that?" Chris fought to control his rising anger, knowing it wasn't at Ezra, as much as on his behalf.

"Ezra – you got friends." JD reiterated. "At least I hope you think of us that way."

"He does JD." Buck answered for Ezra, who couldn't speak. "That's why he did this. That's why he went a little bit crazy on us."

"No Mr. Wilmington. That came nowhere close to crazy. That is a reaction you do not want to encounter from me."

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They spent the afternoon and early evening waiting, with very little patience, for word on Josiah. Any efforts to approach Ezra to discuss his earlier actions were rebuffed, and none of them had the energy to take on that battle right now.

The closest Ezra had come to acknowledging his actions came on his return to the saloon. He said nothing when he entered, but walked over to a corner where a broom was propped against the wall. He took it and quietly began sweeping up what was left of the mess. Inez stepped out from behind the bar, walking over to him slowly. He kept his head bowed, unable to meet her gaze.

"I cannot begin to find the words to express my heartfelt regret for my actions."

"Chairs and glasses can be replacing Senor. Please do not worry yourself with that."

"The material items are not the issue here, although I shall of course take care of that. That is not what I am apologizing for." He looked up and she could see the guilt and sorrow in his eyes.

"Are you feeling better now?"

"I cannot honestly answer that."

She looked across the room and could feel the concern from the other men. "You are here with your friends. That is all the answer I need." She laid her hand on his arm and gently took the broom away. "Go. Be with them. We can discuss the rest of this at a future time."

Ezra offered what could only be described as a surprisingly bashful smile, nodded slightly and left to join the others.

They had taken turns going to check on Josiah, spending a few minutes with him to give Nathan a chance to step away. Ezra alone, had not taken that action. He started to, but the dread that filled him each time he thought of being with Josiah at the end froze him in his tracks. It was late in the evening when Chris decided it was time to try to deal with Ezra.

"I'm not trying to tell you how to feel, and I'm sure not telling you not to feel. But this – this was scary. This came damn close to being a fatal mistake."

"It would not have been a mistake."

"You know what we mean. We get that you care Ezra, and that's good." Vin hoped Ezra didn't need that reassurance. "But this?"

Ezra rose from the table, pacing briefly before stopping next to Chris.

"Tell me Mr. Larabee. Had those responsible for murdering your wife and son been standing in front of you when you learned the news, what would you have done?"

"Likely would've killed them where they stood. But that's not the same thing Ezra. That's family –" he froze at the look on Ezra's face.

"Well, Josiah's going to be mighty pleased to hear that." Nathan's voice from behind startled them all. "Needs some more rest before you can visit with him, but he's going to be fine. He's awake now, but I don't think that's gonna last too long."

Ezra fought to stay upright as his knees buckled slightly. Buck made a move to step forward, but a raised hand from the gambler stopped him. "Thank you. I am fine. I would ask all of you that this display, this discussion, not be shared with Mr. Sanchez. It would benefit no one."

"Would benefit him." Nathan argued. "A lot. Somehow, don't think would hurt you either."

"It would. Deeply. If you truly wish to assist me in all of this, the purging of this day from your memory would serve as an invaluable start.

"Can't do that."

"No, I suppose that would be an impossible request for you to fulfil." He looked over to Chris. "I will not settle you with the burden of trying to explain my actions to judge Travis. I will provide him with what details he needs, along with my resignation of course."

"No need for that Ezra. No need for any of that."

"Surely you cannot be serious. My actions today were unforgivable, and certainly not befitting a law man."

"Your actions today were human Ezra. Kind of nice to see that."

"I cannot promise you it would never happen again."

"I wouldn't believe you if you did, because you don't believe it. Doesn't matter. But for the record, I still don't believe you would'a shot the man in cold blood today, or that you'll do it in the future. Whether you choose to believe that or not is up to you." He turned his attention back to Nathan. "You sure he's out of the woods?"

"There's always the risk of infection, or something else happening. But he is definitely getting stronger. Besides, like we said, he's too damn stubborn."

The tension lessened in the room, but didn't disappear. Ezra still stood stock still, hands grasping on the chair in front of him. Vin was watching closely, certain the man would collapse once he let go. He tried to unobtrusively slip a chair behind Ezra, but the gambler was too alert to let the action pass by.

"That is not necessary, but thank you. I think, unless I am needed for the evening, I shall retire to my room for the night."

"If it'll help you sleep better Ezra, you can poke your head in a minute to say good night to him."

"Thank you, Mr. Jackson. I don't think that would be a good idea this evening. Please let him know I shall come by tomorrow."

"Suit yourself Ezra. I'll be sure to let him know." Nathan shook his head as they watched him leave without any further discussion.

"So," JD broke the silence. "Do we tell Josiah about all of this?"

"You can be damn sure Ezra won't." Buck replied.

"I wasn't lying to him." Nathan said. "I think it would do Josiah good to hear it. I think it would do Ezra good to have him here it."

Chris tilted back in the chair, staring at the seat vacated earlier by Ezra. "I wouldn't have expected it, but I understand what he felt. He's right, I would've killed the bastards that burned the farmhouse. With my bare hands. How can I blame him for feeling the same way I did?"

"There's no blame here Chris. When you think about it, there really isn't much we have to deal with." Vin offered. "All he was doing was trying to intimidate the prisoner. Make sure we didn't have any trouble."

"Yeah, now all we have to do is convince him, the judge, and the prisoner of that."

"I'll take care the prisoner." Buck had a slight smile on his face. "He won't be mentioning this to anybody."

"Don't make this worse Buck."

"Me? Chris you know me better than that."

Chris groaned inwardly. "Well, I'll work on Ezra. Hopefully none of us will have to tell the judge about any of this."

Vin was shaking his head. "Don't think you'll need to. I'm betting that once he has a chance to talk to Josiah, things will work themselves out."

"Why do you say that?"

"He was doing this for Josiah – and that's where the approval or forgiveness or whatever you want to call it, needs to come from. And it will."

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It had been almost an hour since Ezra sat down near Josiah's bed. In that time, neither man had moved. Ezra spent his time rehearsing what he wanted to say. He knew Josiah had been told about his foolish actions of the previous day. Now, no matter how hard he tried, he could not come up with a reasonable story to explain himself. And the idea of telling him the truth terrified him to his very soul.

"You going to give yourself a headache thinking that hard, son." Josiah's voice was rough, and not as strong as usual, but it was still music to Ezra's ears.

"I believe Mr. Jackson instructed you that you were not to speak."

"When have any of us ever listened to Nathan?"

"Based on your injuries, and your apparent level of fatigue, now might be a good time to start." He smiled down at his friend.

Josiah made a move to push himself up on the bed a bit further, but Ezra immediately placed a hand upon his shoulder. "No. Please. Don't try to move. You really were badly injured. You need to stay still, and you need to rest."

"Thirsty."

Ezra poured a small amount of water into the glass on the bed stand and carefully lifted Josiah's head just enough to allow him to take a few sips. "Mr. Jackson said you weren't supposed to drink much. So that's all you get for now. You can have some more in a few minutes, Mr. Sanchez."

"I think, all things considered, you might want to start calling me Josiah."

"I think I would prefer to maintain the status quo." Ezra looked away, unable to bring himself to respond to the stare Josiah was fixing him with.

"You know Ezra, I cannot think of a single time in my life when I have been at the same time so damn proud, and yet so disappointed in someone. What the hell were you thinking boy?"

"I was not thinking. Can we simply leave it at that?"

"Don't think so. I'm truly honoured you feel that strongly Ezra, but you know better than to pull that kind a stunt. You could a got yourself in all kinds of trouble."

Ezra's voice was barely above a whisper. "It would have been worth it."

"No, it wouldn't have been. You've come too far for that, Son. You're making too much of your life to throw it away that way. Especially over an old fool like me."

"You do realize that if you are trying to convince me I should not have feelings of friendship, of family, toward this team, toward you, you probably should stop referring to me as son."

Josiah laughed, wincing as he did so. "Yeah, I guess I should take some of the blame on that." He winced again, and Ezra immediately pulled his chair closer. "You need to rest. If you feel we must discuss this further, I believe it should wait until a time when you have more strength, and I have had the opportunity to rebuild some of my emotional defences." He smiled as he added the last comment.

Josiah shook his head as he closed his eyes. "I don't think we can let you do that again. We got you into the fold Son, and we ain't letting go."

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