A/N: Listen, I hate that I wrote this, too but warning, this is sad and angsty. This plot is basically all the sappy sad movies I have watched mushed together. Let me know what you think. You can shoot me down, I'll take it. I deserved it.
Also, this features a Vance Joy song in the end to help set the mood. Read at your own risk!
It had been a terrible month for Chloe Beale.
At the age of 25, she had been contently living alone in a dinky building apartment in New York, taking the subway to work, getting her usual coffee from the shop across her workplace, and doing her best at her office job of 3 years. That was her routine.
Everything was fine until one day, she received the news that her grandfather had died and she couldn't even go to the funeral. She couldn't go because she needed to finish some papers and reports due Monday or her boss would definitely fire her.
So instead of flying home to Oregon, she spent her weekend pulling all-nighters, doing some research, and making sure every detail was validated. She barely ate during appropriate meal times and if she did, it was mostly coffee and half a sandwich (which wasn't filling enough). Her love life was also withering because Brian, her boyfriend of 10 months, decided to break it off with her that same weekend.
If that wasn't enough, Monday came around and didn't treat Chloe right, either. She sent all the reports needed but managed to mess things up by not replying to a client's email over the weekend. Apparently, it was a very important client because the "abandoned email" (her boss' words, not hers) caused the company a project loss. So, she ended up getting fired right there and then.
Chloe was usually a go-getter and very positive in life but a girl got feelings, too. After cleaning up her desk, she didn't bother saying goodbye to her co-workers. She hit a bar and just drank her week away. She got so intoxicated that on her way home, she fainted. Right in the middle of the streets, she fainted.
It was dark when she woke up. Yet she can hear things and there was a strange smell, an unfamiliar however pristine scent in the room.
She knew she wasn't home.
She felt something poking her in the arm and her other hand flew to touch the area.
"Ma'am, I strongly suggest you not do that."
The words startled the girl. It was pitch black. The voice seemed rather close to her but she couldn't see anyone. Anything. She couldn't see anything!
She started to panic.
"Miss, calm down. I'm your nurse. Calm down! Don't –"
Weight pressing down on her made her frantic even more.
She didn't even realize she was flailing her hands and throwing herself around until she felt another sting in her right arm and the calmness set in. She felt her body relax.
She woke up again and this time, she was a little more alert than before. She tried talking but her mouth was so dry and disgusting that she didn't go through with that idea. Her next attempt was to gently feel the things around her and successfully, she seemed to hit the right button.
Moments later, she was being helped to sit up by a set of arms on each of her sides.
"Hello, Ms. Chloe Beale. I'm Doctor Harris." Chloe heard some paper rustling. "I know this is a lot to take in but do you think you can handle some news right now?"
Chloe opened her mouth a second time in an effort to speak. But, all that came out was just a hoarse inaudible sound.
So she nodded.
"You were rushed in here two nights ago. And we've run some tests as to why. Miss Beale, it seemed that you've overworked your body. You were stressed and over-fatigued. And there – "
"Doc," she finally choked out, "I can't see anything."
She'd been in her apartment since. It had been two weeks and she still wasn't used to using a stick. She familiarized herself with the layout of her place but still, there were moments where she would hit the wall with her face or stumble over something on the floor, like the rug.
For food, she had been given a stock of microwavable food by the caretaker assigned to her when she first came home from the hospital. The rest she had to figure out herself.
There came bad days when she would break down because everything was overwhelming her. She felt mad and betrayed. Like, she had been a good kid, a responsible citizen, never been to jail. She paid her dues and this was what fate did to her?
She didn't do anything to deserve this. One day, it was all sunshine. The next, it was darkness.
This wasn't what she had imagined ever experiencing in life.
On the less negative side, the doctor informed her that this was just temporary blindness due to stress. Her eyesight would come back in time. The danger was if it went over a month, then there would be a possibility of a lifetime blackout.
The positive side of Chloe was certain she would get through this as soon as possible. No matter how hard the situation was.
She was just lying on the couch, contemplating all these things, when she heard a series of taps on her door.
She ignored the sound.
There was another knock, a little louder this time, and so the girl had to stand up and yell, "I'm coming so stop knocking!"
She didn't mean to sound rude. It was just because she was slow and it took so much effort getting up and going to answer it.
She opened the door with the chain still attached and immediately said, "I'm sorry, I'm not interested. Please don't knock here again."
Before she could close the space, the person spoke, "Hi, my name is Beca! I just moved in this building today. I'd like to meet my neighbors and I'm just across from you. Beca Mitchell. Here, have some cupcakes!"
There was a pregnant pause and Chloe couldn't possibly know what was going on.
"Uhm. Okay. Uhh, cool shades!" Beca didn't seem to catch a clue as she referred to the blind girl's glasses.
She unwillingly took them off as she responded. "Right, Beca, is it? Yeah, well, I don't know if you can notice but I have a stick. I'm blind so I can't see you." Chloe paused. "Welcome to the building though."
She heard a slap and pictured it was Beca doing that to herself. "Oh, shoot! I am so sorry. I met Diane earlier, our only other neighbor in this floor. Lovely woman, reminds me of my nan. She told me you were almost my age so she would rather have me befriend you instead." Another silence. "She didn't tell me you were uhm, blind."
Chloe winced. She wasn't used to being one either. "That's because I wasn't." She said that softly, the other girl had to ask.
"What was that?"
"Nothing." She sighed. "Listen, that's very nice of you to come say hi and everything, but I don't think I can befriend anyone at the moment. Sorry."
"That's cool. Well, I'll just see you around. Oh, I mean, shoot. I'm so sorry, I didn't mean – uhm, sorry. Nice to meet you."
Chloe shut the door. Only then she realized she didn't even introduced herself. Suddenly, she felt the reality hit her. That was basically her first conversation in what felt like ages.
The loneliness was creeping in.
She was alone.
The next day, Chloe was just wallowing in sadness again (not in a concerning way, just a healthy amount of sadness) when she heard a knock on the door.
Before she could choose to ignore it, another knock came on with a voice saying, "It's Beca."
When Chloe got to the door, she opened it again the same way as yesterday – with the chains on. "Yes?"
"I baked some cookies." Beca offered them to her. She could tell because the scent of baked goods tickled her nose.
It was tempting but she wasn't feeling up for it. She reasoned, "I'm allergic to peanuts." And closed the door.
It happened again consecutively the third time.
There was a knock on Chloe's apartment. The girl had woken up to the wrong side of the bed and when Beca greeted her warmly, she lashed out at her neighbor.
"Listen, Beca Mitchell. I don't know what your intentions are or why you're doing this but you must be stupid enough to keep knocking on a blind girl's door. Are you not getting it? If you're planning something evil or going to take advantage of me, shame on you! Or you can just su —" Chloe stopped herself and decided it wasn't worth it. She then proceeded to slam the door.
It wasn't like she was out of character. She even surprised herself. Even regretted it a bit after. But Chloe just wasn't ready to give out her trust. Not in a state like this.
She was vulnerable. No one would understand that.
The fourth encounter was an improvement.
After those harsh words, Chloe had secretly hoped that her neighbor would come to her door again. She didn't think to apologize but a chance to explain herself maybe was an option.
There was no knock but she was close enough to the entrance when she heard some shuffling outside her door. It sounded like somebody was slipping something underneath.
Without hesitation, she fully opened her door this time. "Who's there?"
"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. It's me, Beca. It's just that I got some of your letters mixed up in my mailbox. I think yours is full so the postman probably just stuck some in mine." It was a very rushed explanation and Chloe understood why. "I'm not out to get you, I swear. I'm sorry."
Chloe composed herself. "I… appreciate your efforts, Beca." That might be too formal. She cleared her throat. "By the way, I haven't properly introduced myself. My name is Chloe. Beale."
"Yeah, I know." There was an abrupt stop after that sentence. "I, uhm, I saw it in the letters addressed to you."
There was a brief moment of awkwardness in the air so Beca jumped right in when Chloe shifted in her spot.
"No, no, I didn't mean to sound so stalker-ish. I'm not conniving. I just want to, well, it's hard when I literally just moved in here a few days ago. I don't know anyone in this city. I've been all over the place really."
Chloe softened a little when she noticed a difference in Beca's voice. There was a hint of sadness and genuine loneliness, too. Funny how her other senses were extra sensitive because of losing one.
"I'm sorry." She found herself admitting. "For the things I've said yesterday."
"No, you were right. I'm probably really stupid. Most of the time, I don't know what I'm doing. Or why I'm doing it." She hears a forced chuckle.
"No, don't say that. You didn't deserve that. I really apologize. I don't even know you."
Beca audibly exhaled. "Okay, uhhh, so I accept your apology. Relax, Beale. I'm usually just a very chill person."
She wasn't sure if it was because of "Beale", or that this Beca girl seemed like an interesting person but Chloe couldn't resist smiling at that remark.
"I'm usually not that snappy, too. Thanks for understanding."
"No worries. I'll just see you around." Another smile crept on her face when she figured out the other girl had her hand covering her mouth. Her next words were a muffled "I'll improve on that".
When she was back in her apartment all by herself, she couldn't help but think of what just happened. She realized if this neighbor had every intention, she would've acted on it a few days back. It wasn't like there was anything valuable in her place worthy to be stolen, anyways.
And besides, their conversation had stirred up something in her.
Even with her guards up, Chloe considered they could still be fast friends.
Chloe was anticipating already as she stood near the entry.
When she heard Beca knock and announce her presence, the door was quick to open.
"Hi, Chloe! I uhh, got you coffee. And look, be very uhm careful 'cause you're hot, I mean it's hot. Uhhhh." Beca stammered which prompted the question, "What's the matter?" out of her.
"You're just wearing your underwear with that shirt," was her shy answer.
Upon hearing that, Chloe disappeared for a few minutes and came back out again with shorts on. "Sorry, I forgot and didn't know. Nice save though."
"No problem. I don't know what you like but here." The girl nudged the drink towards her.
"Oooh, I'm not picky with coffee. Anything is fine with me." Chloe was just honestly content with a hot beverage.
"Aren't you worried it's poisoned?"
"What's the worst that could happen? If I die now, at least I'll be out of my misery." Chloe didn't mean for that to sound so dire.
Beca gasped at the remark. "Yo, that's dark! I'll drink mine, too, at the same time and you can call 911 if you feel like I poisoned you. This could be some Romeo and Juliet crap."
"Sure." She took a sip and the warmth traveled through her body and seeped into her core. "Ugh, finally. You have no idea how good this feels. I haven't had any fresh meals in a while."
"You can suggest a place to eat and we can go there. I'm dying to know what this city has to offer me."
"Uh, Beca? Are you blind or what? Can't you see that I'm blind?"
"So? Your taste buds work and I trust them because I know you've lived here longer than 5 days. Come on! There's got to be somewhere."
She thought of it for a moment. "Okay, I know a good breakfast restaurant near my workplace before and it's just 15 minutes from here. We have to take the subway."
"Dude, I'm all for it! Tomorrow then?"
"Uhm." That was all Chloe managed to say before she retreated back in her apartment.
She carefully put her red hair up on a bun. Some of the locks fell out but she tried, she really did. She even got to powder her face a little bit. This was just breakfast but it was the first time she would go out after the whole incident.
The knock she was waiting for finally came and she heard Beca's sharp inhale when she knew she was in view.
"You look really pretty, Chloe."
The girl blushed and even hesitated as she confessed, "I'm not sure this is a good idea. I haven't been out for a while. I'm kinda scared, to be honest."
She felt a hand take her arm and looped around the other girl's arm. "I got you. I'll be your eyes."
That caused a tug in Chloe's heartstrings. It was a boost of confidence and a relief altogether. She never would have thought she was going to let Beca in, a girl who lived across from her, a stranger.
Breakfast was amazing! Chloe enjoyed her food very much. She didn't talk a lot because of all the chewing so Beca did most of the conversation. It was satisfying enough for the ginger, as a way to actually know more about her new friend.
"I'm 24 and from Seattle. Moved to Atlanta when I was 6. I've lived in Philadelphia, too, for a while before finally moving in here. I was just excited and this is all new for me, ya know." The girl took a sip of her drink to catch her breath before continuing.
There was a sound of utensils hitting the plate. "I mentioned before that I met Diane, right? Well, she kinda sold you to me, saying how 'a young nice lady lives in 102' and I should 'really meet her because she's just the sweetest gal and that's coming from your generation'. I don't exactly know what she means by that." Beca even did a decent impersonation of their old lady neighbor when she said the words from Diane.
"That's her for you. She knitted me a sweater once." Chloe finally added to the topic.
Beca then moved on to talking about cooking and baking and how her first batch of cupcakes was the one she offered Chloe the first time. "When you answered the door for the first time, I noticed your red hair immediately. It wasn't until you took off your glasses that I've seen your eyes. Wow, they are so blue, and light, like I'm staring at the sky."
"You're really good at making a girl feel better about herself, do you know that?"
"Don't flatter yourself, Beale. I'm just stating a fact. My eyes are blue, too." Beca let out a laugh. "You're not special. There's like, a million of us."
This was amusing to Chloe. Spending time with Beca turned out to be more fun than she expected. She also pondered about how she and the girl connected and clicked.
The girls just went straight home after their breakfast. Still learning about each other on on their way, Chloe even took notice of how the other girl talked or joked.
As they were nearing their respective doors, Beca expressed herself. "That was great food at such an affordable price, Chloe. You're right about that place. We should go back some other time."
The implication in that last line did not escape her. Chloe just gave her a little smile. "Enjoy the rest of your day, Beca."
Beca patiently stayed with her until the latter entered her place. It was a nice gesture. Even Chloe admitted to herself that she was actually looking forward to being with Beca once more.
Morning came and Beca had somehow convinced her to go out again.
"I've never been to the Brooklyn Aquarium. Can you come with me?"
"Why me?"
"Haven't you been there?"
"Oh, totes. Like, a dozen times."
"That's why."
It was almost an hour of subway. Chloe wasn't a fan of train rides but she enjoyed the crowd and the live music on the streets to and from the station. Who wouldn't? Some people lived by busking and got away with it. Such was city life.
She was feeling the vibe. She was feeling alive. All she needed to do was listen.
The aquarium wasn't that great. There were kids screaming and crying in the background almost all the time. They were on a bench for a rest and the ladies casually chatted.
Chloe had her share of awful memories in this place, so that was a starter.
"Why is that?" Beca inquired.
"I had a date bring me here once and this is where I found out he was vegan." Chloe recalled. "I'm not all about that life."
Both of them shared a laugh. The other girl then voiced, "So, I realized I don't know anything about you. Can I ask you more questions? Like, basics, where are you from? All that? Am I allowed to do that?"
There was a pause and only the busy aquarium noise was resounding. Chloe eventually broke it off.
"I think it would only be fair, yes. There's not much to know really. I'm from Portland, Oregon. Moved here when I was 17. After graduating, I got a job at an office." She paused for a second and then, finished it off with, "I was there for 3 years before I got fired."
Beca made an 'oh' sound. "Any siblings?"
"No. I've never met my mom and my dad sort of just disappeared on me through the years. He was very unreliable. My grandfather recently passed away and he was the closest relative I've had. We weren't really close but I just feel bad not seeing him." She confessed. Boy, did it feel therapeutic to finally pluck off some thorns from her chest. This had been bothering her ever since.
Chloe learned how to be independent at such a young age. She remembered being all over the place. From neighbor after neighbor. To distant aunts and cousins, she was being passed around. This was what made her personality.
Instead of growing up a rebel, she picked up the nicest things from others. Everyone had left her some lessons that she found very handy in life.
She loved people but never really managed to have one stay with her. Still, she was doing just fine.
She reckoned if she couldn't be happy with herself, she would just be let down by other people. She understood, even as a young child, that they would all come and go. So she had a tendency to be clingy but not possessive. Whatever happened to that, it still worked for her.
That all contributed to Chloe having fantastic people-skills. And where did that get her? Blind and alone, telling this story to Beca.
"Woah, boy, that was a movie-worthy plot. You should write a book." Beca took it upon herself to touch Chloe's arm, as a way of comforting maybe but she wasn't sure what for.
The ginger flinched upon contact but Beca didn't even try to remove her hand. Distracting herself from the warmth of this sudden proximity, she asked, "What about you?"
"Uhm, me?" And the physical connection was gone. "Well, no siblings as well. My parents are divorced. I couldn't care less about relatives. So, I sort of was not a good kid growing up, it's all angst. Long story short, I'm here now trying to adult."
Chloe perked up and raised an eyebrow. "Beca Mitchell, ever a mystery. I wonder what you look like." She said that last part out loud unintentionally.
At first, she was embarrassed. However, she felt hands on hers being lifted up not too long after she said that. "Here. Put your hands on my face. Picture me."
So she did. She pinched her cheeks, touched her eyebrows, and ran her fingers on the length of her nose. Basically, she studied (squished) Beca's whole face by hand.
"What's your hair color?"
Beca answered with a questioning tone when Chloe brushed her head. "Brown? But like, kinda dark."
"Hmmmm." There was a smile forming on her lips. "Your features are amazing. And you said you have blue eyes? Becs, you must be a very gorgeous woman!" Chloe cupped her cheeks one more time before letting her hands fall.
"Hmm. You really are blind." Beca dryly stated.
Chloe jokingly slapped her in whatever body part she had just reached. She heard the girl feign an "ouch!" as they both laughed.
On the train ride home, Beca was uncharacteristically quiet even though they were sitting next to each other.
"Why are you staring at me?" Chloe asked.
Beca nervously responded. "How do you know that? Can you see me?"
"No. But I can feel your breath on my neck."
"Oh."
They continued doing this for a few more days. Some days they would go eat out, some days they'd visit recreational sites.
It occurred to Chloe that Beca is unknowingly helping her de-stress. She lived in this darkness for almost a month now but for some reasons, she wasn't thinking about it.
Beca had brought her to the park near their building. Unbeknownst to Chloe, the brunette had with her a travel guitar that she owned.
So when Chloe found out, she requested a song, of course.
Beca played with the strings for a little bit before settling into a rhythm. Chloe recognized the intro. The girl was playing her an acoustic version of Titanium.
When Beca started singing, it almost brought a tear to the redhead's eye. There was no other way to describe it other than her voice was like that of an angel. Her chest felt tight and she didn't even notice how fast her heartbeat was. As Beca reached the final chorus, Chloe found herself harmonizing with her. They were singing it together and it sounded so good.
Beca was the first to speak after their impromptu duet. "You surprise me, Beale. You can sing!"
Chloe shook her head. "No, you can sing! You surprised me! How high does your belt go?"
"My what?"
"Never mind. How are you not famous? Seriously, the world should hear you, Becs. You got me there. I'm your number one fan, I'm calling it now. Have you ever thought about doing it professionally?"
"I was a street performer, actually. I would be playing near the train stations in Philly and I could gather a crowd sometimes. It was good. I prefer songwriting though."
"You've written original songs?" Chloe had her mouth wide open. "Why aren't we talking about this?"
"Because it's nothing yet." Beca softly strummed her guitar, creating such melodic background for their ears.
"Can I hear one then?" Chloe teased.
Beca's firm refusal earned a giggle from the redhead.
"My, my, my. When am I ever going to unravel all of you?" Chloe chuckled as she scooted closer to the brunette.
"I've got alcohol at my place. Wanna drink?" Beca's offer was just what she needed. She figured it had been weeks so she might as well let go. Even for just one night.
That was how they ended up having tipsy talk at Beca's apartment. They talked more about love this time and it just got deeper and deeper as the hours went on.
"Beca, how many relationships have you had?" There was no reign on that mouth if drinks were poured every 6 minutes.
Beca took her time before answering. "Just two. I had Jesie when I was 17 and lasted about a year. Then, Vince at 20. Broke up with me over text after 2 years. What a jerk."
She sympathized before being asked back the same question.
Chloe gulped down a drink and then replied. "I probably had 4. Jake when I was 16. Didn't last long, of course. Tony at 18. That almost lasted a year. There was Clyde when I was 20. Only for, like, 3 months though. I went on a few dates with a few other people after him but nothing serious. Then, there was Brian. We lasted 10 months before he broke up with me saying I don't really have time for him anymore. Such a lame excuse!"
"Do you swing both ways?" The question came from Beca who also had no reign on her mouth at all.
Chloe reddened and raised an eyebrow. "Tony isn't a boy." 4 words and she was out.
She heard Beca gulp down a drink before she, too, came out saying, "Jesie isn't either."
Chloe didn't move on from the discussion. She further explained. "Brian, he was right, in a way. I didn't have time for him because I was working all the time. I guess I wasn't just totally in love with him or anything."
"Yeah, but how do you know you're in love?" Beca slurred.
They were both sitting cross-legged on the floor at this point, unabashedly comfortable with themselves.
"That depends. I guess you'd know it when you find yourself looking for them when they're not around. Like, they're all you can think about. Whatever they do, it sends little butterflies in your stomach. It's cliché, I know. But when you're in love, you'll see these things about them that makes them special. For you. They may not be special for other people, but they are to you."
Beca just hummed at first. "Sometimes, you don't even have to see it. You just have to feel. Not everything can be seen by the eyes, Chlo. There's more than just that. Or at least, what I think."
Chloe wasn't expecting this response from Beca. She suddenly sensed the temperature rising in the room but they weren't even doing anything…yet.
Pushing herself up from the ground, Chloe dragged Beca with her.
"Come on. Stand up! Let's dance." She beckoned for the other girl to come closer.
"I'll put on my mix. Gimme a sec."
It wasn't loud but there was music. Not just any music, but really good songs that could make one shake their groove.
Beca stood in front of Chloe and the latter could feel her. She even put both her hands on the brunette's shoulder as they swayed.
"Oooh, Beca? Am I taller than you?" She asked, grinning. "It seemed that I am. Am I taller?"
Beca answered this by circling her arms around the redhead's neck. "Nothing to boast about. Just a few inches, Chlo. Just a few."
She threw her head back to let out a chuckle. "You're cute. But ugh, this isn't fair! You can see me dance but I can't see you."
Beca was quick to come up with an idea. "Just put a blindfold on me."
She found a scarf somewhere and offered it to Chloe. "Here, tie it around me."
The redhead successfully tied it around Beca and the thuds and grunts that followed just supported that success. These elicited a few good laughs from her until she thought of how difficult it was to not be able to see and be tripping over things.
"You okay?" Chloe genuinely cared if Beca had hurt herself.
"I'll live. I forgot there was a coffee table there. I'm coming for you." She had her arms extended out and when the redhead captured them, she pulled her closer.
Fuelled by the alcohol, they both danced embarrassingly and enthusiastically until their legs surrendered first.
When they slowed, Chloe could feel Beca's breathing on her face. She realized how close they were. It was even to the point of their noses brushing. She also sensed how loud the thumping in her chest was.
In between the pants and exhales from their preceding activity, Chloe breathed, "Beca, we're very close right now. I think this dancing is gonna make us discover things about ourselves."
Beca whispered her reply, "Is that right?"
It was so close to her ear, it gave her the chills. She sensed the brunette pull back an inch. "So you want another drink?"
"We're not getting drunk, Beca." Chloe laughed, but only after she regained control over her thoughts.
Somehow, they ended up hanging out again the next night. They were walking in the streets of New York, just casually chatting.
"I know it's only been, like, a little more than two weeks, but how come you've never told me you sing?" Beca asked.
"Becs, a lot of people can sing. I can. But you, you're more. How come you've never told me you sing?" Choe retaliated, giving more stress to the word 'you'.
"Oh, honey, there's a lot of things I never told you." Beca shot back.
"Yeah, I know. Bet I can make you." Before the brunette could process it, Chloe had her in a tight hug. She didn't let go easily. They stayed like that for what felt like forever.
Beca, who absentmindedly wrapped her arm around the girl's waist, ran her other hand down Chloe's back. "Chloe?"
The girl loosened up a little to give her a proper more heartwarming embrace. "Thank you, Beca. You have no idea how much you've changed me in the last couple of weeks. I wish we've met sooner."
"No, thank you, Chloe. You've changed me, too. More than you think." There was a hesitation in the redhead's grip when she pulled back. "I have to get something first. Can I leave you here for a few minutes? Will you be okay?"
Chloe nodded.
Beca gave her a quick peck on the cheek. "I'll be back."
Then, there was just the noise from the streets. And some people were walking by her, she could feel it.
Chloe's hand darted to her forehead as she rubbed it with her fingers. There was an unexplainable drill at the side of her temple and she closed her eyes in pain. When she opened them, there was a blurry speck of light. Then she blinked and the blur was still there but now she could make out the scene in front of her. Albeit, unfocused yet cinematic in effect.
She closed her eyes one more time, and when she opened them, she was squinting at how bright everything was. Despite the fact that it was night time.
Her vision had come back. She could see the stores and restaurants across from her. She could see people crossing the streets. She could see cars parked, and the trees, and the lights. She could see them all.
And then, she saw her.
Across the street.
She raised her hand and waved at the girl. Chloe flashed her the biggest smile she could do.
The other girl seemed to realize what had happened so she waved back and yelled, "Chloe!"
At last, Chloe finally saw the girl she had been hanging out with. She could finally see Beca Mitchell.
One thing she was wrong about though.
Beca was more beautiful than she could ever picture in her head. She visualized her chocolate hair that waved at the length of her shoulder, like she was straight out of a magazine. The way she dressed, with a black blazer over her grey top, dark jeans, and hi-cut boots, had Chloe weak to her knees. It was simple yet so captivating.
She was not one to believe in love at first sight but this case might be an exception.
Seeing Beca for the first time with her own eyes, it was like home. The concept of "home" might not be as clear as it should be but there was this familiarity. Like she'd known Beca longer. Like she was the home that Chloe lived in. Like she could only hope Beca would finally be the one.
The one who would stay.
"Beca!" She yelled back as she stepped into the streets.
She saw Beca waving her to go back when she moved forward only to realize there was a car coming. She barely made it back safely to the side walk and her heartbeat would have exploded there and then. She escaped death by an inch. All these scenarios were playing in her head in that split second.
She was about to thank the brunette for warning her.
But she wasn't there.
She wasn't where Beca Mitchell was standing just a few seconds ago.
That spot was empty.
She couldn't see her anymore.
Everything was suddenly in slow motion. No, she didn't lose her vision again.
She could still see the lights, the streets, and the car that stopped across the street. She could still see a few bystanders huddle up in one spot. But she couldn't see Beca. She was just there and now, she wasn't.
It couldn't be.
She didn't believe what was happening until tears fell down her cheeks. Her hands flew to her gaping mouth as she held back a few strong sobs of aftershock.
Her apartment was different even though technically, she'd been here once already. The layout was not how she imagined it. It was more organized and messy at the same time.
Chloe sat there on the floor surrounded by a few bottles of beer and wine. They were probably still from the night they danced silly and all those tomfoolery.
She slowly made her way to the bedroom. When she got there, it was like the same familiar feeling of Beca.
On one side of the room, there was a setup of trackpads and controllers connected to a laptop for Beca's mixes. Right beside it was a keyboard on a stand. A guitar was leaning on her closet door. There were even some papers scattered around the instruments, too. Chloe figured it was for her songwriting but she respected Beca's personal privacy.
What caught her attention was the number of polaroids and pictures hanging right on the wall. It was art the way she designed and aligned them all as if it was her own mini gallery. She stood in front of one and examined it.
It was a picture of Beca looking more alternative than the Beca she saw last night.
Her heart clenched at the thought of last night but she controlled herself. She was here on a mission. To gather some of Beca's things.
Alt Beca looked really good with her ear spikes and kinda short hair even when she wasn't smiling in the photo. She was wearing eyeliner and a flannel shirt, plus a guitar was strapped on her back. The picture appeared to be taken on a station in Philly. Was this what she meant when she said she was a street performer? She looked so young, though, around 16 maybe?
There was another picture of her performing in a station where she was facing a crowd. But, Chloe was aware this one was shot in New York City. She knew this station! She'd been in this station! Beca had scribbled a date on this one so the girl knew she had to be 17. At such a young age, Beca seemed to be really everywhere.
There was another picture of her in what seemed like a party where she had both her arms on the shoulders of two guys around her age. She looked smashed but a wide grin was on her face. This made Chloe smile to herself.
There were a few more pictures of her performing with a band on the streets and at the station. The rest were aesthetic shots and stills of her holding the guitar, playing the piano, and some inanimate objects that reminded her of songs.
She thought she even saw herself in the crowd but it was hard to tell in a Polaroid picture. She dismissed the frivolity and stepped in front of the closet door.
Clothes. Beca's clothes. She needed to pack them. While she was doing this, she noticed a folded paper fall off one of the jeans' pockets. She would have ignored that too until she glinted a sight of her name written on it.
CHLOE
Her curiosity won her over as she picked it up and opened it. She should've stopped when she realized it was a letter but it had her name on it!
It reads:
Chloe,
I'm writing this just in case I chicken out. My hands are already clammy just doing this but what if I can't actually say hi to you? When you get to see me, what if I freak you out?
You won't probably recognize me but we've met before. I believe you were still in college then. I was at the train station, busking.
Beca had been living off her street performing since she could remember. She tried early on in life to raise herself. She didn't need anyone. She had music.
Her life in Philadelphia had been okay. She'd been acquainted to some people in there who taught her how to survive the city. They were in music with her, too. Unfortunately, it wasn't positive all the time. Some guys from a band she met would roll her a smoke. Other groups would drag her to party wild and hard. A few buskers would even offer her "sweet candy" to reach some "high" notes. Beca, careless and stubborn, would take them all.
When she got bored, she'd hop on the train to NYC. It was her escape from her escape. Then she'd perform there, too. She had the talent and the people walking passed her would drop some coins in good grace.
One day, her father found her in this scene and took her aside to talk to her. He was a professor at a university in Philly and offered Beca a chance to be a student there for free. Her father had told her she wouldn't get anything from busking. Education was the key, he stressed!
Against her will, Beca did try. But after a few months, she snuck out to go back to the streets. Nothing could stop her from doing whatever she wanted.
On one occasion, in New York, she saw a blonde girl maybe the same age as her stop and listen to her sing. She didn't say anything, just stood there with her eyes closed and lips curved up. When the song was done, she dropped a dollar on Beca's guitar case and gave her a wink.
I thought that was it considering I see hundreds of faces in the train station everyday. I never imagined I'd see you again after that. Every time I perform in NY, I seem to always see you. Mind you, I was switching back and forth from Philly, too.
You've never actually stayed for a whole song because of the train schedule. But you linger, for some reasons. I doubt you could even hear me. You always had that smile, though. And I wasn't used to that kind of sunshine.
I don't know how it happened but you actually talked to me. It was just a few minutes but it actually impacted me big time! You said,
"Your songs are original, right? Did you write them?"
"Uhh yeah?"
"Do you read music?"
"A little. I skipped that class though."
"If you could get back, you should. Every time I pass by here and hear you, my spirits are lifted up. College is stressing me out and I honestly want to hear your songs in the future. You know, carry it with me on my phone or something. You look young, I'm sure you can influence this world better. Not everyone has talent like you do."
"Yeah but guitar playing isn't a born trait. People can learn it. Writing is also a learned ability. I'm not that special."
The blonde just smiled. "You never know. People who walked past you here don't know what they're missing. You deserve more than this station. It takes effort on your part though, you have to at least try. You can start by studying again."
"Listen, Miss It's-None-Of-Your-Business, you don't even know me."
"My name is Chloe. Beale. Now, you know me." She winked. "It's not too late for you."
"I don't need to go to college. Degree? Pffshh, I don't need that garbage. I have my music."
"Exactly. Do it for music."
I should do it for music. I didn't care about the world at that time. I was too broken. But your words echoed through my head. No matter hard I try to erase what you said, you actually do have a point.
And I was young, Chloe. I didn't know why I was doing it, either. Told you I'm stupid!
I just feel angry all the time with the world and I channel it through my songs. You messed me up, girl. You know what I did? I contacted my dad and asked for another chance. I soldiered through university and got my degree. I still don't care about getting a degree but I actually learned a lot of things about music I never thought I needed. I admit, it helped a lot.
Beca was on her way to an interview in NY. If she would get this job, she would have to move here and start fresh. She was pondering over this in the train when a certain person caught her eye. She was just meters away from her but Beca recognized Chloe. Except her hair was red. And she looked formal. She looked different but how could she forget the girl who changed her?
As fate would have it, she lost her in the crowd when they both got off the same station. Beca swore it was a moment that would never happen again. Alas, it was a well-played joke because just a few minutes later, she crossed paths with Chloe again in front of a coffee shop. She was tempted to call out but she figured the ginger wouldn't even see her. Beca continued walking a block more to where she was headed.
A week later, she went back to NY to scout some apartments she could move in to. It had been a tiring day and this one place was the last on her list. As she was passing by it, she realized how shabby and old the building was. That would explain why it was budget-friendly. She was just saving the contact details of said apartment when a speck of red passed by her peripheral vision. Her neck turned so quickly as she followed the sight of Chloe, clearly just got home from work, go in the building.
As of this time, I only had written 3 songs for two different artists and a band in a record label I work at. It's nothing yet but I'm working on producing one of mine. I don't want to be so cheesy, because that's gross, but I made one inspired by you.
Beca mentally slapped herself. How could she be so insensitive of Chloe's situation? "See you around?" A kid wouldn't even have slipped with that. She had to increase her baking skills. She could try and befriend Chloe with peanut butter cookies. Who could resist cookies?
Apparently, Chloe could. This did not shake Beca. She was determined to make it up to Chloe.
The redhead softened to her gradually up to the brink of her asking Beca why she never asked how she got blind.
"I figured you would just tell me on your own in time." She answered. Chloe pouted like she was about to cry but decided to hold it. So she told Beca that it was just temporary.
Beca was motivated even more to give Chloe back what she had given her.
A chance.
Little did she know, her attraction to the redhead wasn't just because of their past. It was a feeling she was quite unfamiliar with but she knew existed.
Tell me what you think of it. I want to know. (And I hope my writing this actually means I have given this to you and you can actually listen to the song.)
Somebody you saved,
Beca xx
The paper was wet from all the crying. Chloe, never in her wildest dreams would this have ever crossed her mind. No wonder there was that connection she couldn't explain. That familiarity with Beca. Stupid Beca. She didn't even say anything! Why now?
"No, silly! You're such an idiot! You saved me," she confessed, wiping off her nose.
She saw Beca's laptop was on. If she could just move the mouse, she'd probably find the song. When she slid the pad, the first thing that appeared on the screen was a program that the brunette was probably working on. It was a track.
It was saved as I'm With You (for Chloe) and she already shed another tear just seeing this.
Chloe pressed play and the soft intro echoed in the quiet room. She found herself on the floor with Beca's clothes around her.
The song. The words. The voice. Chloe had never wept like this before. It felt so unfair.
She was here in her room but Beca wasn't. She was here in this song but Beca wasn't. "I'm With You" she sang but Beca wasn't.
She found a scarf on the pile in front of her and she picked it up by instinct. Lifting her arms, she tied it around her eyes like a blindfold.
Beca might not be in this room but Chloe could picture her. Like this. In this darkness. Her cries were still fresh but Beca's voice was soothing her. As she listened, she remembered how it was like when they were dancing so close to each other, how the shorter girl felt under her touch.
"You're so unfair." She confronted imaginary Beca. "I've never even confirmed how blue your eyes are."
Chloe bit her lip to control her sniffling. "You better wake up, Mitchell. I'm not done with you yet."
Music was still playing on repeat in that room even though Chloe had fallen asleep, still with her eyes covered, on Beca's bed. She didn't even finish packing the clothes but that could wait until the next day when she'd go back to the hospital.
End note: I know, I'm sorry. Forgive me? I'll suggest you listen to this I'm With You by Vance Joy as a truce? xx