I force my eyes open, and get a glance at the nights sky. The moon. It reminds me so much of him. The power, the beauty, the menace. The moon in all its glory, could not be altered so simply. Was what it was whether or not others desired its presence. At night, it was in control. Beautiful.
I rolled over and stretched, a smile spread across my pale face. He was standing above me, eyes holding a sharp smile. Staring down at my naked body, wandering eyes devouring my skin. He always looks at me with desire, like no other woman has ever held such an attraction for him. I love the way he looks at me. I love even more how he touches me now, so unchaste, filled with a unrestrained desire. Before he changed me by mistake that night not long ago. We played our games and we were rough with one another, but he never wanted to harm me. Never wanted to drain me like he did, but I did not mind. Being bound to him for eternity was not something I saw as dreadful. He changed me, and he saved me. More than once. The first time was when he saw me spiraling down into the darkness. Headed for a crash, headed for something far worse than I realized. A clueless young party girl, headed for destruction. He caught me before it was too late, and made me his. Saved me again by changing me, making me a vampire. Bringing me into his eternity. Making me his again.
Spike and I were never ordinary. Never like the rest of the world. We never fit in with the scoobies, which was hard on both of us. I was forced into that world, forced to be normal, when I never was. Spike never really belonged anywhere and it was hard when he tried to fit in with my sister. That was a mistake, they never really made sense together. Spike knew that, just wanted some place where he could fit. He thought Buffy, being that she had been with a vampire, could see who he really was, she never did. All that time he had me as his friend, he tells me he never imagined I could feel that way for him. I was too good, too pure. But I never really was, always caught in the middle. Caught in between the light and the darkness.
After he turned me, it was almost like my soul was not lost. Spike thinks it has something to do with me being the key. I am a walking contradiction, or so he says. I love listening to him talk, listening to his theories about me. I can not make myself grasp why he feels the way he does about me. How this love came to be what it has. I remembered being the girl he saw as just a friend, sweet little Dawnie. I still do not understand how he came to see me as a lover. I refuse to question what we have become, nothing good ever comes from doubting.
"Sleep well?" Spike sits on the edge of the bed next to me, as I lay on my stomach wrapping my arms around the pillow in front of me. Spike slides his hand over my back pushing the silk sheet off of my skin slowly.
"You know very well just how little I slept." I smile and lean my chin against my hand, holding up my face to look at him. I did not mind lacking sleep when it was him keeping me awake. There was not a more divine exhaustion.
"Mm." He smiles warmly as he slides his hand across my body seductively. He leans his head in to press his lips against my back. I shiver as he continues to place kisses against my skin. It is always shocking how no matter how often we are together, it almost gets better each time. I never cease to grow weak with his touch.
"So what is on the agenda for today?" I ask leaning on my side now. Being vampires made it so we could do whatever we wanted, whenever we wanted. No need to work, no need to live a normal life, because we were not normal. Freedom was what immortality gave us. Ultimate freedom, at least in this world. In this life. Yet we chained ourselves together willingly.
"I have some ideas." He licks his lips suggestively and runs his tongue along the inside of his mouth like he sometimes does. Every move he makes is sexy to me, without him even trying. It seemed he always had the same ideas about what we should do for fun. We were free to live a life of fun, of our own devices.
Our moment is abruptly interrupted by the loud ringing of my cell phone. I look at the phone sitting on the bedside table and let out a loud sigh. I do not want to reach for the phone, there is no way it is anyone that I wish to speak to. Spike sees my anguish and reaches for the small shiny cell phone. He flips it open and puts it to his face without hesitation.
"'Ello poofter." Spikes voice is not joking and I do not realize why. I can not hear what Angel is saying on the other line but I can tell it is irritating Spike a bit. He looks down at me as he allows Angel to speak for a moment. "She is not much for speaking at the moment, had a long night." Spike has his hand on my shoulder gently stroking my skin. I love how he touches me now, so naturally. "Listen poofter, if the girl wanted to speak to you she would have called you. Stop pestering us. Dawn chose me, not you, and she is not about to change her bloody mind." Spike hisses and hangs up the phone without much warning. I can see in his face that Angel has left him more irritated than he wants me to realize. I get an idea what Angel has said by Spikes responses.
"What was that all about?" I furrow my eyebrows and sit up quickly holding the sheet to cover myself.
"Would you stop doing that." Spike grabs the sheet and pulls it off of my chest, smiling. I can not seem to help but be slightly shy, even still. "Angel was just suggesting that I was no good for you, even now." Spike half smiles. "He wants you Dawn, that is all it is about." He lets out a breathy chuckle. He is irritated but he is trying not to show it. He wants to seem always confident. Before he changed me I would have believed him, but now I realize he is nervous. Maybe he thinks I will chose Angel over him. Buffy did. Everyone did. Not me.
"Spike..." I move closer to him and reach up to grasp the back of his neck. I press my forehead against his affectionately. "If I had my choice of every man in the world, it would be the easiest choice I ever had to make in my entire life." I smile and press my lips against his gently.
"That means you would choose me right?" Spike smiles jokingly and I can not help but laugh.
"Yes." I laugh and roll my eyes.
Before I know it Spike is on top of me crushing my mouth with his own. Our lips are entangling and I can feel the uncontrollable fire inside of me. The fire is fueled whenever his hands are touching me. Whenever our lips touch.
"I don't deserve you." He grasps my face in his hands as he is laying on top of me. "There is no one on this earth like you." His sapphire eyes are staring deep into mine. He looks serious now as he runs his hands through my hair.
"You deserve anything you want, Spike." I smile and close my eyes. How he can not see that he deserves the world, I will never understand. I open my eyes again and press my lips against his. So maybe I find myself responding with my lips too often, but can you blame me?
"You are my angel." He whispers almost inaudible, if it were not for my vampire hearing I might have missed it. "I think we were always meant to be together." He smiles at his conclusion. "There could never be anyone else for me."
He crushes my mouth with his own just like I want. I could spend my entire existence in his arms. Inside this reality we have created. Tangled together. My life and his were always meant to be one, just like he said. Maybe we had to leave behind the people we knew back in Sunnydale, but we never made sense in that town. We made sense together. We had found our own path, our own happiness. We were not perfect and we never would be, we did not need to be. All I knew was that this was where we belonged.
"So pet?" Spike smiles suggestively. "Want to make another night of it?" His accent rings through the room.
"Hmm..." I grin at him playfully. "You'll have to catch me first." I toss him off of me quickly. I dart across the room and into the kitchen of our apartment. Our place was big enough that we could play these little games and I adore every minute of it.
"Dammit Dawn." He chuckles and chases me effortlessly catching up to me. "Caught yah!" He beams wrapping his arms around my naked body. Yes, he most certainly did catch me. And I was never allowing him to let go. I hop into his arms wrapping my legs around his waste. We smile as our eyes lock and he squeezes me tightly. We had forever to play these games. We did not plan on wasting a minute of our time apart. Because we deserved this. We were always meant for this. Two broken pieces of a puzzle, and we fit together perfectly.