So, this is my new story! I hope you all like it! I'm taking a break from Touched By Love for a bit because I'm having writers block (again!). Grr! Anyway, enjoy!

Sian's Point Of View

I was groggy, and it was difficult to open my eyes. When I did, however, it made next to no difference, it was so dark. But I didn't need to see. The first thing that registered in my mind was PAIN. My whole body burned. Through my blurry vision, in the dim light of a distant street light, I could see a puddle of dark liquid. It was blood. I was lying in a pool of my own blood. It was seeping from cuts all over my body, soaking my clothes.

I couldn't move, all of the energy had been sucked from my body, and I was left weak, helpless. Almost lifeless. I couldn't move, I could barely speak, and it hurt to breathe. Through the rain that has started to fall, I tried to attract attention from passers-by. "Help! Help me, somebody! Please!" I croaked, feebly.

Nobody came, for what seemed like hours. I called for Jez, Michael, Madi, Zack, hoping that somebody, anybody, would come and save me. As the minutes ticked by, I felt myself slipping into the cold, bony hands of death…

And then I woke up. It was okay. I was in my own bed, not down some dark alleyway. I was fine, no cuts or scratches anywhere. There was no blood, just the blue duvet covering me. I sighed with relief.

But even though I knew that it was just a dream, or rather, a nightmare, I couldn't feel reassured. I'd had that same nightmare so many times, and it wasn't just a nightmare, it had a meaning. I had tried to have everything: Jez and the kids; and Michael too. But it won't work, you can't have it all. Someday, it will come crashing down on me, and I'll lose everything. There won't be anybody there to come and help when I need it.

I looked at Jez, sleeping peacefully beside me. He didn't deserve to have a wrecked marriage. All he wanted was the best for us, all of us. He tried hard to make everybody happy, and he used to succeed, but now… I wasn't sure that Jez was the right choice, the one for me, any more.

Jez or Michael? This time last year, I would have said Jez, straight away, no doubts. But now, I wasn't so sure. I had feelings for Michael again, there was no point denying it. But why? Why do I have feelings for Michael now, after I've married Jez? Why couldn't I have felt this way while I was still with Michael? It's so unfair! Cupid's failing me at the moment, what with his rubbish timing and bad aim.

A tear slid down my cheek and onto the pillow. I didn't want to hurt anyone. I just wanted life to be simple. I wanted one clear answer that I could stick to, without any heartbreak. But life isn't like that. Life is complicated, life is difficult. In this situation, heartbreak is unavoidable. This decision, Michael or Jez, would be the most difficult decision of all.

Of course, life is never easy.