Can't Hurt Me

"Will we meet again sometime?" I stared into Haku's jade eyes, memorizing every detail of his face that I could. It was almost as if he would disappear, or worse, just like my parents, if I forgot what he looked like.

"Sure we will," he responded, his voice as gentle and sweet as I'd ever heard it. His eyes laughed, and color was coming back to his face. I knew that he would be alright. I wasn't so sure about myself.

"Promise?" I asked desperately. I felt as though I was losing him, but what could I say? I knew he couldn't come with me. His home was gone, covered with apartments.

"Promise. Now go, and don't look back." Haku seemed so confident. I had to believe him. I took one last look at him, knowing it would have to last me awhile, and I turned away, not letting go of his hand until the last second. As soon as I did, something twisted inside of me. A piece of my heart ripped off and locked itself away. It would not come back until I saw Haku once again.

xXx

The clouds above moved in strange patterns that I had only been able to pick out since my return from the Spirit Realm. I saw No Face, Granny, the little soot spiders. I saw the foreman. I saw Lin, Boh, Kamajii, and on bad days, I saw Yubaba. The one face that always eluded me was Haku's face. I often thought that it was because his features were too beautifully perfect, too precise, for the indistinct clouds to picture.

I had never forgotten about Haku, or the Spirit Realm. I had no desire to. It was a hard place for a human to be, and yet I did not regret going there at all. I would not have met the wonderful people that I did. Yet I knew that they would not have wanted me to constantly dwell on what had been. So every day, I forced myself to live for the moment. Still, they haunted my every thought. I was now seventeen, so it had almost six years, yet on a whim I could picture any of their faces easier then I could picture my own.

I sat up and looked out over the mountain side. The home we had moved into was beautiful. It was perched on the side of a mountain. Lush grass dotted with flowers covered the mountain, and it flattened into a valley. On the other side, equally lovely mountains rose up, and between two I could see the glittering, sapphire sea. I knew Haku would have loved it. Sometimes, I looked down at the river that ran down the center of the valley and wondered if he swam in its aquamarine waters, unable to rise up and meet me.

I turned away from the sight, unable to look at the jade grass surrounding its banks without thinking of Haku. I thought I heard soft laughter dancing along the wind, but that would not have been the first time. But then there was an unmistakable thud, as though someone had fallen down, followed quickly by a grunt, and then a low moan. My heart pounding, I turned, to find myself looking at someone very different from who I'd been expecting, yet who was undeniably the same.

I ran to the long, thin body that lay sprawled out on the grass. Falling to my knees, I turned over the young man, and found myself looking into the jade eyes that I'd dreamed about for almost six years. He had grown. His face was more mature, his hair had turned a dark, rich brown and changed styles, and his shoulders were broader. He was now a man.

But he was still Haku.

I found I couldn't breathe. We stared at each other for a long time. The only movement was when I reflexively pulled him closer, resting his head on my lap. I searched his eyes as intently, as hungrily, as he searched my own chocolate gaze. I touched his jaw lightly, and his own elegant, slender fingers cupped my cheek gently, as though not quite believing I was real. I couldn't blame him. I had a hard time understanding that he was here as well.

Slowly I began to notice more subtle changes in his eyes. The last expression I remember him having was a peaceful, laughing expression. He had been so calm, so confident. Now, while he was undeniably joyous, something was different. He was closer to who he'd been when I had first met him. Harder, more wary. And in pain. I opened my mouth to speak, but air seemed hard to come by. His fingers trailed down my face to brush across my lips. I closed my eyes, smiling gently into the warmth of his hand. His hand traced the line of my neck until it rested on a tiny crystal around a silver chain.

I opened my eyes and met his burning gaze. He remembered. He'd slipped the necklace into my pocket before I'd left, along with a note written in hasty, sloppy scrawl. I love you-Haku. I still had the note, hidden well in my box of treasures. Finally, he found his voice. "You still have that."

I almost pulled away. I'd expected the young boy's voice that I'd last heard. But he sounded like a young man now. I should have expected that. I had to look and sound different. "Yes," I answered quietly. My voice sounded raspy to my ears.

Haku slowly sat up. He rose as though every movement caused him pain. I watched him like a hawk, not missing when his right hand reached back and brushed something on his back. "I thought you would have given up."

"Never," I murmured. "I thought you'd forgotten. It's been almost six years, Haku. Where have you been?"

He didn't hear much past 'forgotten.' He stared me blankly when he suddenly grabbed me by the shoulders and pushed me back into the grass, ranging above me slowly. "Never," he whispered fiercely. "I could never forget you, Chihiro." He muttered something quick and indecipherable, something like an oath. Not a curse. But a strong, powerful promise.

Not that I was in much of a position to notice details. I was still trying to catch my breath that Haku had taken away from me. I knew I loved him, but I'd forgotten how potent that love was. His scent was washing away all logical thought, his intense gaze burning through any thoughts I might have had. I closed my eyes and let his nearness carry me away with him. I felt him lower himself onto the ground next to me. I reached out blindly and found myself being pulled into his strong, slender arms. I rested my forehead against his chest, and inhaled deeply. He buried his head in the crook of my neck, and for a long time, we just lay there, breathing each others scent. For a long time, that was all the answers I needed.

An immeasurable period of time passed. I couldn't have told you if it was seconds, minutes, hours…it could have been years, for all I knew. But after a time, I tilted my head back to look at Haku. I knew he wouldn't be sleeping. He met my gaze immediately. He recognized the questions in my eyes. The content look slowly slipped away. Barely concealed agony shone in the depths of his eyes, and twisted the curve of his lovely mouth. I touched those lips and then sat up. Haku gingerly rested his back against a nearby tree, and I slid up to him, leaning lightly against him. He wrapped his arms around my waist and held me tightly. We were silent for a few minutes, and then finally I asked very quietly, "Haku…where were you?"

I felt him flinch slightly underneath me. "Yubaba doesn't take very well to losing her slaves. And I was the best she's ever had. She did not let go willingly."

I could feel him getting restless, so I moved aside. He shot me a grateful look before slowly standing up. He went to the ledge where I often sat to watch the clouds. He looked out blankly over the valley as he spoke. His voice was horribly toneless. "She used her magic to trap me in a room in her godforsaken apartment made of mirrors. The only thing that stopped me from going mad was the fact that I'd learned more from her than she knew. I knew the tricks she would throw at me, and I knew how to counteract them. And so, for what few months in our time, but a few years for you, I stayed locked in that room."

I shuddered at the thought. Haku had always been strong, but I knew from the look on his face that the room alone had scarred him. Still, I was more concerned about what made him move so stiffly. "What happened afterwards?"

"I didn't realize how cruel Yubaba could be," Haku continued, his voice still scarily flat. "I knew she was greedy, and hated to be tricked. But she has a sadistic side that I, in all my years of service, had never seen. I became her whipping boy, among other things. She used powerful magic, magic she'd never shown me before, to keep me trapped."

I felt rage course through me, along with feeling like I was going to be sick. I stood up and went to stand a little to his side, and just behind him. "Haku…"

He shook his head vigorously. I knew he had to finish, so I silenced myself. "I'm a quick learner. I only dealt with that for two months. I had learned what magic she used, and I took a risk to counteract whatever magic she was using to tie my bonds. It worked."

The blunt way he ended the sentence made me think there was more to the story. I came up close to him and touched his shoulder very gently. "Haku, where are your scars?"

Haku turned around, standing up straight. I saw him wince from that motion alone. His expression was…hard to read. It was almost as though he was pleading with me to understand, to accept him. I frowned slightly. What was there to reject. I took his hand and squeezed gently. "It's ok," I murmured.

He shook his head sharply, as though he disagreed. As though it wasn't ok, not at all. I was worried. What was he afraid of? How badly was he hurt? At first, he hesitated, and then looked as though he wasn't going to show me. But he slowly took off his shirt and, very reluctantly, turned around. The first thing I noticed was how heavily muscled he was. His body was tall and slender, yet it was obvious that the muscles on his body were hard and completely solid. But my eyes were quickly drawn away from the horror I saw I on his back.

Livid scars crisscrossed all over his back, along with purple, green, and yellow bruises. A few cuts were still scabbed, and look ready to open and bleed at the slightest movement. A few scars were horrible, and I could tell that they had been infected. But one scar stood out above all others. On his right shoulder blade was what looked like a gunshot wound. Deep, and badly scarred, except it was in the shape of a star. "My god…" I whispered.

Haku pulled away sharply. He stood on the very edge of the ledge and looked out at the valley. His gaze was tortured. I knew that there was more than he was telling, but I didn't want or need specifics. I knew what had basically happened. I would only ask if he wanted to tell.

I went over to him and took his hand, pulling him back to face me. His eyes were sad, and a little afraid. I noticed a thin scar along his cheekbone. I ran my finger along it lightly. He watched my every movement carefully. I realized with a start that he was afraid I wouldn't love him anymore. I couldn't figure out why, but I could tell that's what he was thinking. So I stood on my tiptoes and brushed my lips across the thin scar.

Electricity ran between us. That was the first time we'd ever kissed. I felt a shiver run down my spine, and I saw him visibly tremble. I turned him back around to look at his scars again. Led by some strange instinct, I began to kiss each wound. I felt his body quiver at every contact. I smiled slightly as my lips ran along the lines of the whips, barely touching the newer wounds. My fingers traced every line, every scar. Finally, I kissed the star-shaped bullet scar.

Haku suddenly turned around and grasped my hips firmly in his hands. He pulled me close to him, our bodies melding together as easily as our lips. I sighed and wrapped my arms around his neck. At first I shied away, afraid I'd hurt him. But then, Haku leaned forward and whispered something very softly into my ear.

"I've found you, Chihiro, and you're back in my arms. Nothing can hurt me now."

xXx

I stared down at my love, clothed as though nothing was different, as though she was going to attend a nice dinner. I reached out and touched her pale, cold cheek very lightly, and brushed a lock of silver hair out of her face. I stared down at her cold, dead lips. I knew that she would never laugh again. I turned away sharply and walked out the door, going to the edge of the river and kneeling down beside it. I wished that I could be the Kohaku River Spirit again, that I could slip into the waters and never resurface. But I knew that I could never be one with the waters again.

I trailed my fingers along the surface, watching the water ripple in my wake. A strange light twinkled in its depths. Not sunlight, and no reflection off a fish. It was as though the light itself existed in the water. I saw eyes, and then a face slowly become visible in the river. I gasped sharply. Chihiro.

She had been restored to her youth. Her lovely brown eyes laughed up at me, and I smiled back, just as I knew she would wish. And then, without hesitation, I fell into the river. I let it, her, carry me away. As my vision turned black, I heard a voice, clear as day, ring in my mind.

You found me, Haku. You're back in my arms. No one can hurt us now.

A/N: So this is a work in progress. I want to make this the best it can be, so I'm continuously editing it. I really need criticism. I'm not so sure about this ending. I know I want it to end in italics, and I want it to be Haku's point of view, but I don't know if I want it to portray Chihiro's death. Ideas are NEEDED.