Summary: This is where we learn. Conclusion to my Twilight series.
Author's notes: Sorry for the terrible lateness of this post, but life sure has a way of coming up on ya when ya least expect it. Heh, no one knows this better than Kimble I guess, who is nothing less than a small part of myself. I shortened this somewhat from what I had originally planned in the hopes of getting it out there faster. It did need to be uncluttered a bit, hopefully it won't be too choppy. Let me know if it is, eh? Thanks.
Art for this is up at my website for those who are interested. The site can be reached through my profile.
A quick aside should anyone from Marvel out there actually read this. I would like to toss out a loud and profanity filled complaint directed towards Daniel Way for killing off my dearest Wild Child. It was most unexpected and deeply distressing. Did you pluck Kyle out of limbo just to kill off him so pathetically? If so, then here's my heartfelt "fuck you, you most inconsiderate jerkface!"
Ahem. We now return to our regularly scheduled programming...
Updated 11-9-13 to add (break)s as needed. And yeah, still pissed about Wild Child.
(One)
Hank woke from his nap, sprawled out blue and large over the bed in his private Med Lab suite. Star didn't have a scent or a heartbeat like the regular, organic people who lived here, but he knew she was gone from the room just the same. He sniffed the air, looking for her, and growled with an increasing impatience. This was wrong. She was supposed to be here. She was always here at his beck and call and he would not have it otherwise.
He rose and stood, taking a moment for a full body shake to shrug off the last of his sleep. He was growing more used to this new form, to its larger mass and quietly slumbering strength. When he was a little more stable, he wanted to do some testing on himself. The dormant scientist within was waking and it was curious about the changes he had gone through.
It wasn't the only thing he was curious about. He looked about the room, confirming what he already knew. He was alone in here.
He moved to the door and shouted gruffly, "Star!"
A moment later a Siskan came to his door but it wasn't Star. Seth was there and peering through the small glass window in the door. "Hank? Are you all right?"
"Where... is .. Star?" he growled, unable to do this without a flash of large teeth.
Seth grew wary, intimidated by the new changes in his old friend. There was going to be a lot he would have to get used to. "She left to visit Warren. He said he needed to see her for something. I'll go see what's going on."
Hank stepped back, trying to keep his temper in check. With the bodily changes had come this driving feral impatience that was hard to control. When he wanted something it had to be given right now - when it was desired, as he desired it. There was no asking, there was only taking. His older inner self was not dead and was still here, trying to soothe him into some kind of calm. Star would come, she always did. He would just have to wait.
He couldn't do it. Not just yet. He lasted all of about five minutes and then slammed a fist into a the door, hearing it creak just a bit from the stress. "Star!" he roared more than shouted.
A frightened nurse dared to stand within view of the glass. "Seth has gone to fetch her," she said, her voice trembling with real fear. "I'll send for Asher as well."
"I DON'T WANT ASHER!" Hank bellowed in complaint, his rage increasing exponentially with each passing second. He slammed both blue fists into the door this time and watched in satisfaction as it splintered down the middle without actually separating in two, the glass and the hard wiring for the door lock were the only things holding it together now. It wasn't going to take much more abuse, it hadn't been designed for that. There had been a very good reason that he had been in the holding cell before instead of this room and it was showing.
The nurse fled in a panic at that. She wasn't sure what to do, so she called the first person that came to mind – Logan. Luckily he picked up on the first ring.
"Logan here."
"Sir, we have a problem. Star has gone missing and Dr. McCoy is freaking out. He was taken out from the holding cell because he was doing better and placed in the rear room. It won't hold him now that he is in a rage."
Wolverine was confused. "What do you mean Star is missing? She never leaves him."
"Mr. Worthington asked to see her privately and now we can't find either of them."
"Fine. I'll get right on it."
Logan hung up, scowling with impatience. This was a disruption he hadn't needed.
Done with the day's rounds, he had gone looking for his wife in the hopes of settling things. He had found her at her office but she was with a client so he had been forced to wait. He had been lingering in her waiting room when this call came in, bored, and getting more and more aggravated with each passing minute. Hank wasn't the only one with temper issues. All that and now this.
Wolverine left the room as soon as he hung up the phone and left his potential round two argument with his wife behind, going to the closest security station. It might not be that hard to find Warren – this place was full of scanners, all he had to do was see where the guy had badged last and start from there. One quick check later and Logan stood blinking at the monitor in confusion. Warren had last badged a half hour ago in the latest section of the Complex that was still under construction. There was nothing up and running down there so he couldn't fathom why the heck Warren would be there, never mind bringing Star here with him.
Well, he would just have to go down there and find out.
Not bothering to ask for backup, Wolverine went down to the deeper levels and to the room where Warren had last badged, taking the stairs since it was faster than the elevators. Although he was rightfully concerned about the odd situation, he didn't think it was so serious that he would need to strong arm the guy.
That idea began to change when he ended up standing in front of a large steel door, locked up tight. Why on earth would Warren have locked himself away with Star unless it was something beyond bad? Still staring at the door, Logan reached for his radio and called out, "Max, you on?"
"Yeah, boss," came the quick reply.
"Do me a favor, come down to Level C, B wing."
"The new one? It isn't even finished," came Max's confused answer.
"Yeah, the new one. Somethin's not right and I might need a bit of muscle."
Max laughed, happy with the compliment. He was a regular at the gym, looking to compliment his telekinetic ability with some force of his own. "I'll be right there."
Logan clicked off and again pondered the door. He knew he wasn't going to like what he was going to find. He was old enough to know that life just didn't work that way, not in situations like these. He swiped his badge and just as he expected, the stupid box just chirped back at him, denying him access.
"The hard way it is," he growled in complaint and without further ado, popped claws and thrust them through the door. The Danger Room with its extra protections aside, he had no expectation that this form of egress would be denied him and he was correct. Steel door or not, his adamantium claws cut through it easily enough and he carved out himself a decent sized circle to enter through.
The room was huge and dark, only dimly lit from a small lamp on the desk. Wolverine smelled Honey first which instantly made him growl. It had confirmed his worst fears. The blood and sweat came next. Agony has a certain tang to it, as if he could just smell the screams right in the air though they no longer echoed. Some great evil had been committed here and it was now up to him to sort it out.
Even though he had no idea of just what exactly he had walked into, he reached for his radio again, better safe than sorry. "This Logan calling all services. I need an EMT and emergency medical crew down on C level, Room 205, stat."
"Received," came the quick reply from the Security watch desk.
"Star?" he called out cautiously into the large empty room, his eyes roaming all over the place, looking for potential threats before going in any deeper. The room was mostly vacant besides the desk and chair but he could just make out a large lump on the floor, too large to be just one person. It wasn't shaped just right and he couldn't quite make out who it was. It couldn't be Star by herself - he could hear a single, irregular heartbeat in there and a shallow thready breathing.
The only reply to Logan's question was a soft whimper of fear. That was most definitely Star and the large mass on the floor began to move as she struggled to free herself. Logan moved quickly then and went over to her. She was naked and filthy, her clothes in shredded rags around her ankles. She jerked away from him in fear and he let her, not wanting to box her in. "Easy, girl," he soothed. "It's me, Logan."
Star cried out again and then she was suddenly there, scrambling into his arms and almost rocking him back as she slammed into him. She straddled him like a young child, so small and fragile there. As she crashed into him, an empathic wave of emotion nearly overpowered him, taking away his breath. She was terrified, hurt and terribly, terribly afraid. The wave was powerful, real and as good as scent for informing him that this was not being faked. It was genuine raw emotion and he had to squeeze his eyes against rising tears as his arms folded around her, offering her unspoken protection in response to her unbridled distress.
His arms automatically closed around her, not even registering at first that she was naked and what this might look like. His only concern was for her. She was shivering hard and cold and clammy to the touch, side effects of being very low on power. Once the empathic waved dissipated, another wave of sensory information swirled around him. She was doused in this man's stink, the one who lay beside her. His blood and yes, his semen covered her like a sick, monstrous slime, awakening Logan's rage. Loose feathers were plastered to her body, like she had been run over by a flock of birds. She had been ill used indeed.
Star couldn't even speak, she just kept making these poor, sad mewling cries of woe and anguish, sounds far more painful for him to hear than if she had spoken her pain aloud with real words.
Wolverine could see it now in his head, how this all had played out. Warren had brought her down here so he could use the Honey in private and Logan had an idea she hadn't exactly volunteered to help him, not for this last bit anyhow. She was a mess and the thought of how Warren had mistreated her was maddening.
"Yer gonna be okay," he promised her with genuine emotion, still holding her tight. This was so very hard. He was in no position now to defend his earlier argument that these man made Siskans could not feel, that they were not the least bit real. She trembled there in his grasp, every bit as alive as one of his own daughters. "He ain't gonna hurt you no more."
Star didn't reply with words but sobbed gratefully against him, holding him painfully tight with her enhanced strength, bruising him in her hysteria without realizing it.
Logan squirmed, getting his jacket off, and put it around her to cover her. She allowed it but still wouldn't let him go. She was still so terribly frightened.
Logan looked up and growled defensively when he saw someone block the light from the hole he had made in the door. He saw Max's familiar silhouette there and relaxed with relief. He rose awkwardly to his feet, bringing Star up with him in his arms.
"You in here, boss?" Max asked into the darkness, his eyes blinking in the dim. "Gah! What's that smell?"
"Blood and Honey," Logan replied tersely, still pissed off that he hadn't seen this coming in time to prevent it. "I got Star here and she's hurt."
Logan carried the tiny girl over to Max and handed her over. "EMT's are on their way down. Wait with her here."
Star whimpered in protest as she was separated from her rescuer. She had associated Logan with strength and didn't know Max that well. She was aware that Max disliked her in some way, she had seen him looking at her in the past, that strange light in his eyes. She didn't want to go with someone she didn't quite trust.
Logan palmed her cheek and spoke to her the same as he would any other poor frightened human child. "It'll be all right, darlin'. I gotta stay here and take care of the rat bastard that did this to you 'cause there ain't no circumstances – ever – that makes this okay. I'm gonna make sure he stays put and far far away from you, all right?"
Star nodded, placated more by his leaking emotions than the actual words he had spoken. He had meant what he had said and it comforted her. The unspoken part – that her being Siskan and a healer could never justify what had been done to her – meant the most. She was not unaware of his unease with her kind and she could see that some of that had now shifted away in her favor.
Max took her readily enough but he was wary, unsure what had brought out this side of Logan he had rarely seen. Logan was almost never this nice to the Siskans, no matter how screwed up they were. Max was also eyeballing the remaining figure on the floor with well trained caution. "Who's that?"
"Not sure. Might be Warren, but if it is, something's happened to him. Something bad."
"Is he alive?"
Logan squinted at the note of concern there. Max and Warren had a lot in common – they were both blonde and winged. They were often mistaken as being related but it wasn't the case at all. Max was the real powerhouse of the pair, having his teke to assist his winged ability to fly. He could do more faster and he was moving quickly up the ranks.
Logan growled his answer, "He's breathin', that's all I know right now. If he's lucky, he won't make it 'cause he ain't gonna like what I'm gonna do to him if he pulls through."
Max shivered with real fear. Logan wasn't one to fool around and this was no empty threat. He watched as Logan turned and reentered the room, not quite sure what his quick tempered boss was going to do.
(break)
A couple of levels above Logan, Remy chased after his fleeing son, not having a clue as to what he should say. He was furious, his own temper barely in check. Yeah, he had anticipated that Julien might not approve of Kimble and Aiden's lifestyle, but to have been so cruel as to accuse Kimble of intending him harm was inexcusable. Remy knew Kimble better than anyone, there was no way gentle Kimble would ever have done anything untoward with the boy. Now here was yet another mess he would have to clean up. How much more harm could Kimble suffer without breaking? He was cracking a bit already with Zander popping out again at will. Hell, Julien was lucky the Punisher didn't come out and crisp fry his ass with that sword of his for daring to insult Kimble like that. Small blessings indeed.
A familiar door slamming up ahead told Remy all he needed to know. Julien had gone through the first Solarium door he could find like a rabbit going back to its den. This level wasn't that deep underground and so wasn't the one with the sanctuary. Where would Julien go?
Each level of the Solarium was different, growing bigger the deeper you went into the Complex. This first level was less park like and mostly rocks and hiking paths with just enough grass here and there for picnics, the walls perfect for beginner and amateur rock climbing. It did have several large pools, one with a wonderful cascading waterfall about twenty feet high.
There was a blur up ahead in the grass and Remy just caught sight of the lad slipping through a turn in the rocks. There was a loud splash and Remy knew the boy had gone right on into one of the pools near the waterfall. He wasn't afraid the kid would drown, the water here was never deep for that reason.
He found Julien mid thigh deep in the water, nearly under the large waterfall itself. Julien had stripped off his grey hoodie and his shirt and was using the shirt as a washrag, scrubbing the skin on his chest nearly raw. He was swaying, muttering garbled prayers or curses. Remy couldn't be certain.
There was much Gambit didn't know about his son. Frost had been a master at theatrics and was a user of props. Water was one of his favorites and Julien had responded just as well as Frost as hoped. Under the man's spell, Julien had begged for repeated baptisms as he had struggled with finding his place in the camps. Like the sanctuary, water had become a place of safety and comfort to the boy. It made him feel clean, pure – or as pure as a sinful mutant could ever be. As soon as Julien had seen the waterfall he had run for it, going home.
Remy sighed with impatience at the sight of his son in the water, it looked like he was going to get wet. He dared to wade into the pool, coming closer. Two days of good food had done little to fill out the boy's emaciated frame no matter how good the intentions. Silver scars crisscrossed the boy's back and Remy recognized them for what they were - he had been beaten with a belt at some point in his short but turbulent life. He was bruised about the shoulders, signs of Logan's rough handling when he had been taken aboard the Dragon 2. It halted Remy's anger, made him switch gears. The child was disturbed - not gleefully so - but because someone had done this to him. Remy's anger was best directed at the cause, not at the victim himself. He would have to be careful and patient.
The boy was muttering as he scrubbed and scrubbed, saying, "It wasn't my fault... it wasn't my fault..."
"What wasn't yo' fault?" Remy asked in a hushed and cautious whisper.
The boy wouldn't look at him. "It's wrong what they did. It wasn't my fault. It's a sin and they deserved to be punished."
"Who deserves to be punished?"
Julien's eyes met his, not quite sane. "It's a sin for a man to lie with another man!"
"Say some, but not everyone."
"It's in the Book. It's a sin. They have to be punished!" Julien insisted, indignant.
Remy sighed, wanting a cigarette so badly then he could have killed for it. He reached for a stick of gum instead and slid it into his mouth, trying to plan his next words very carefully. "Sometimes a person do what we don' approve of, but you got to remember one t'ing – de final judgement belong to God, not us. Sometime you jus' gotta live and let live."
"That's not true!" Julien snarled, spitting a bit in his anger. "They have done the worst of sins! They have to be punished! They have to die!"
Remy's eyes widened a bit at his son's idea of a fit sentence, but he remained calm for the moment, chewing thoughtfully even as his indignation grew. He couldn't keep the sarcasm from his voice as he said, "Mais, right. Right. Deir love, it so much worse dan stealin' a child, poisoning dem, stealin' away deir right to have dey own kids, forcin' dem to work 'til dey drop and when dey pass, just buryin' dem in a field like so much trash. You read dat in de Book, too?"
"Frost wasn't wrong!" Julien snarled defensively, his eyes blazing.
"Really?" Remy questioned with a short laugh, unfazed by the boy's outburst. "So tell me, fils? When exactly did Kim make dis 'pass' at you? Tell me just when he make you t'ink even fo' just one minute dat 'e might 'urt you dat way?"
Julien trembled where he stood, his shine a kaleidoscope of swirling colors. He had no good answer for Remy's quick question. Kimble had been nothing but kind and Aiden had been right there when he had needed it. They had fed him, cared for him, made him feel safe and yet they were.. ..they were... THAT. He shuddered in revulsion. Of course if Frost was wrong about them then he was wrong about... well.. Julien closed his eyes and stepped back, not wanting to think about that. What he had seen so long ago had been so awful.
Remy watched this. He wasn't as perceptive as Asher but he was learning fast. "What you see dere, fils? Eh? What just cross yo' mind?"
Julien shivered and panted, dripping with sweat, water and frustration, the memories coming fast and hard. They couldn't both be right, Frost and this man who was his real father. Julien was torn between an act of hate and an act of love, both supposedly justified, yet they did not even remotely agree.
Remy took another step forward, still determined to press Kimble's case. "So long as you cuze' m' Kimble fo' sumpt'in we bot' know damn well he ain't never done you can at least tell me why!"
"I don't want to talk about that," Julien replied, resuming his furious scrubbing, as if that could erase the last few minutes.
Remy spread his arms in invitation, tilting his head as a challenge. His eyes were hard, fatherly, as he said, "You de one brung it up. You can't just point yo' finger an' run, fils. Life don' work dat way and m' Kimble deserve better."
Julien looked up at him and groaned loudly, angrily, between his tightly clenched teeth. This was too hard, too much, but here he was, thigh deep in water, the one who had started this. Could he really speak of it? Of what he had seen? He looked around him then, at the rocks and the water. There were no cameras here.
"What you say, stay between you an me," Remy offered, having questioned enough shady people to understand what Julien was doing. "We'll work it out whatever it is, fils."
"I saw... I saw..." Julien started but then hesitated.
"Saw what? Spit it out, boy. Say it fo' m' Kimble."
"Frost said it was bad what they did, those boys. And he punished them for it."
"Which boys was dat?"
Julien didn't immediately answer, but after a moment he began to tell his tale. He hadn't been at Toranado long when it had happened, this thing he had seen that he did not fully understand.
The barracks of enslaved kids had always been segregated by gender, Frost wasn't about to give the kids any chance to fool around. Plus he wanted free access to the girls for his own men without any trouble. This meant the boys were all housed together for better or for worse.
Like most prison situations, the kids naturally fell into gangs determined by their size and color and by what mutations might give them an advantage. The stronger gangs preyed on the weak, they became the bullies just as Frost was bullying them.
Julien had escaped the worst of the abuse simply by becoming Frost's lackey. Before that had happened though, they had smelled his weakness right from the start and didn't take long to single him out. It had been late at night when they had finally come for him. They came at him while he was in bed asleep. They beat him with bars of soap wrapped in pillowcases, mightily entertained by his screams of pain. The guards outside did not come to his rescue – as long as no one was breaking out, they could care less what went on inside.
Frost was different, though. He had been expressing an interest in Julien, asking him questions and testing how responsive he was to the Word. He could see that Julien was listening, one of the few here who did. When Frost had seen that Julien was beaten, he removed Julien from the barracks and placed him in safer housing.
Once he had the boy isolated from the heathen, Frost taught Julien to read when he saw the interest. He had hoped that perhaps the boy would be effective in converting the others. If he could sway Julien, maybe Julien could next sway the rest. Frost was wrong. The kids hated Julien all the more instead, seeing him as a traitor. The fact that they had beaten the snot out of him hadn't registered with them, he had simply sold out as far as they were concerned.
Julien thrived in his new environment under Frost's care. His improved reading skills earned him the position as Frost's assistant. He also gained other special privileges – better food, a nice bed all to himself and of course, the boss' protection. He was no longer beaten or openly teased by the other kids, even as he took his turn in the flower fields. Julien felt like he belonged somewhere for the first time in his life and that new born confidence made it easy to overlook some of the more disturbing aspects of camp life. He knew about the graveyard of course, but it had been compartmentalized, put aside into a dark corner in his mind. He did as he was told and Frost gave him more and more chores and more attention, something this love starved boy drank up like wine.
Now that Julien was out of reach, the gang of boys moved on to more easier targets. They found one in young Peter, a rough skinned, frail young man who was prone to injury. He was also quite fair of face and more than a little effeminate. Poor Peter suffered the fate Julien probably only narrowly avoided. They came on him one quiet night just as they had with Julien and they had their fun, doing far more than simply beating him with soap.
The next morning when Frost began his first rounds of the day, he found young Peter stripped of his clothes, just standing naked in the front yard of his cabin, blood dripping down his legs, so terribly defiled. His eyes were glazed over and his body bore the bruises of every hand that had held him down. His skin was wet with the morning damp, he had been standing there for some time in his daze. He hadn't dared to return inside.
Julien stood next to Frost as his assistant, and was shocked silent. He did not fully understand what had been done to the lad, only that it had been something awful.
Frost approached Peter and asked, "Who did this to you, son?"
Peter's eyes stared sightlessly forward. "Tom and Steve," he named numbly, still swaying ever so slightly in the breeze like a weakened sapling. "I don't remember who else..."
Julien didn't know if Peter's testimony could be trusted, he was in such a state, but he knew the boys well and hadn't been all that surprised. They were two of the boys that had beaten him with the bars of soap, egging the others on.
Frost blew the whistle he kept around his neck and mustered the boys, calling them from out of the barracks. They came, sleepy and tousled, some rubbing their eyes. It was early, they should have had another half hour of sleep. When they saw Peter they grew wary, some even stepping away from Tom and Steve, having an idea who might just get the axe for this.
Frost inspected the boys, walking amongst them as they formed their half hearted rows. He grabbed Steve and Tom by an ear each and dragged them to the front where Peter still stood. Peter was unafraid to have them so close, his glassy eyes had wandered up to the pale grey sky as if seeking rescue from above. He seemed unaware of the commotion he had caused.
Frost was in control of the boys he had selected. They weren't fighting him too vigorously yet. The early muster had alerted some of the armed guards and they were coming closer in case their boss might need them. There would be no escape.
Having a captive audience now, Frost began to preach. "It is an abomination for a man to lie with another man as a woman, we have spoken of this before."
It was true. Frost had given many sermons on the rules and conduct of the camp and life in general. Most of it was over the top and just too full of doom and gloom for the captives to take it all that seriously. They should have, because Frost was about to show them what true enforcement consisted of.
"Homosexuals are predators," Frost continued. "They prey on young boys and spread their sin like a disease. Most of you suffer from sin already, just look at how many of you already bear the mark of it. But to add this vile form of fornication to the list..? Well, that is unforgivable."
Steve and Tom got the gist of that right quick and began to break free from Frost who still held them. Frost was unconcerned, his men had come close enough to detain them and they didn't get more than a couple of steps away. The kids were held in place as a more ominous man came forward – Gus.
Julien had been aware of Gus for some time now. Gus wasn't like the others, he had been already stranded and living here at Toranado when Jason Frost had discovered it. Frost may have intimidated Julien, but Gus outright frightened him. There was a coldness to the man that simply whispered "danger" in the loudest voice possible. This man was a killer, one who enjoyed it.
"There are two kinds of sinners here - one that asks for it and one that readily complies. Both are not wanted here," Frost said to the group. He nodded at Gus, "Remove the defiled, the one who asked for it."
Gus went to Peter who still stood in his broken minded daze. Julien had thought to protest, to ask in just what way Peter had asked for what was done to him, but the words failed him. Peter was weak, he had been girly, there had been talk that he might be gay even before Julien had been removed from the barracks. Frost was wise, he must know what he was doing.
Gus embraced the small boy from behind as if to hug him and with one swift movement, snapped the boy's neck with enough force that his head now faced backwards. It was quick and clean, almost a mercy as Peter didn't even fight it. One moment he was standing, the next he was slumped and falling. Gus followed him down, kneeling and looking deeply into Peter's eyes as his life sputtered and went out, the sacrificial lamb to Frost's unyielding sense of propriety.
Tom and Steve renewed their struggles more vigorously at the sight of what Gus had done. They had finally realized the extent of their peril but now it was too late. They had nowhere to run to.
Frost turned his heated gaze upon them. "His sin was but a passive one, but you – yours was that much the worse for you sought him out like the rutting, piggy little faggots that you are! You are that sin in full bloom, seeking out the weaker to vent out your disgusting lust filled, little perverted fantasies on! Did you make him suck it before you shoved it in his tight little ass?!"
Steve screamed in terror he couldn't help it. Most bullies are in fact cowards themselves and this was far too much for him to bear. He thrashed and flailed, but was unable to free himself even as Gus came to him next. It wasn't going to be quick and easy like the ticket poor little Peter had bought. No, Gus drew out a large hunting knife as he strode right on over and he plunged it deep into the young man's belly, ripping up violently and then to the side, all the better to disembowel his prey.
Back in the Solarium, Remy raised his hands in surrender. "D'accorde, fils. I get de point." He wasn't sure how much more he wanted to hear.
"Do you?" Julien challenged sharply. "Frost wasn't wrong. Those two boys did this rotten thing to Peter. He asked for it, I know it, and yet look what happened to all of them? They all paid! Homosexuality is a sin!"
"Non!" Remy snapped, raising a finger in emphasis. "Rape is a sin. Takin' by force is a sin and dat's what dem boys did to Peter, who I seriously doubt even asked fo' it at all, certainly not like dat! But to share sumptin' in love between two consentin' adults ain't even close to de same t'ing. You seen Kimble and Aiden together. You honestly t'ink dey beat each other down like a coupla wild beasts? Use yo' brain, fils!"
Julien shrank back, lowering his eyes. It was true he could hardly imagine Kimble and Aiden abusing each other as those boys had done to Peter. Even as he had walked in on the Siskans, they hadn't been struggling with one another or causing each other any pain. Aiden had been touching Kimble so gently, like Julien would have wanted to touch Kiden himself. Still, Julien couldn't reconcile the two things - the Siskans' love for one another and what had occurred at the Toranado camp.
"Frost wasn't wrong," Julien repeated, though with a lot less conviction than before.
"What make you so sure?"
Julien burst into tears, he couldn't help it. This was much too painful and his head hurt beyond a simple headache. He pressed a hand into one of his eyes and said, "Because... because Frost doesn't murder people!"
Remy smiled, knowing that he had finally won. Here it was, the truth that poor young Julien couldn't possibly avoid. "Well, now you come to it, fils. You got dis idea dat Frost got it all figured out, dat he never do one t'ing wrong, but it ain't true. He told you what you needed to 'ear so he'd get you to do what he want – and I can prove it.
"You say you know de Bible so good, eh? You tell me one time – one time! - Jesus ever say it was okay to kill anyone gay? Even better – you tell me one time Jesus ever say it was okay to kill anyone at all!"
Julien shuddered and began to sob now. "But Frost said -"
"Said what? You give me de chapter an verse, eh?"
Julien glared at him, still hitching. "That's not fair. We can't read the Book!'
Remy arched an eyebrow at that and then laughed. "Really? Wow, you mo' gullible dan I t'ought. Lord have mercy. You sayin' Frost teach you all dis crap and you just took 'is word fo' it without lookin' it up yo'self? Dat's rich. Dat's proof alone of just 'ow much dat bastard fuck wit you.
"You know who Frost really was? He wasn't nuthin' more dan a used car salesman sellin' de Old Testament bus of 'atred an' intolerance. All Frost was interested in was makin' a bunch a money off of people's fears and keepin' little boys cowed just like he done to you. Since when does a person bein' different make dem disposable? T'ink about it. He used you, fils, plain and simple!"
"Liar!" Julien snarled, still trying in vain to cling to those things that had held him together for so long. That ground was now shifting sand, threatening to sink him down deep.
"Uh, huh. Right. I got a Bible right nex' to my bed. You really wanna challenge dis? We can go right now and pop dat baby open, go verse fo' verse if you like. You goan see dere a whole lotta crap missin', specifically all dis bullshit Frost been shovin' down yo' t'roat wit' you hardly puttin' up much of a fight. We'll see who's right den, eh?"
"Unclean!" Julien howled. "Mutants should never touch the Book! We are not worthy!"
Remy snorted, not backing down an inch now that he had the higher ground. "Who tell you dat? Frost again? You hypocrite! You stand 'ere 'cuzin' m' boys of blasphemy and tellin' us mutants we all unclean when you ain't never read de Book fo' y'self. Seems to me dat it a real convenient way fo' Frost to keep you from knowin' de whole trut'. Tell you what? Ash would be 'appy to give you a whole stack of Bibles any time you like, fils. You can come down to de Church wit' me any Sunday you like. Get you t'rough de Sacraments any time. Fix dat 'ead of yours just fine!"
"You lie! It's a sin for mutants to enter a real church!"
"Since when?" Remy scoffed, disgusted by all of Frost's hypocrisy. "I was raised Catholic from de day I was old enough to read m' firs' words."
"Idolater!" Julien spat with renewed vehemence, as though Remy had just supplied him with some new excuse to dismiss his words.
"Excuse me?" Remy asked with genuine surprise. He simply could not fathom where this boy was coming from.
"You worship the crucifix! You think a stupid piece of bread is Jesus!"
Remy just shook his head with a sad smile. He never thought he would ever have to give an apology for his faith like this, but the boy was just too confused. Frost had done his job well. "We don' worship de crucifix, it just a symbol of what Christ done fo' us. What He done fo' you. De host just what it is, Communion between us and God. It's us takin' a little bit of God inside ourselves, makin' us better. But you still didn't answer m' question, fils. Where did Jesus say it was okay to do what Frost done to the boys like dat? And if not de boys, what about de girls, eh? It ain't right and if you got even half a heart you know it, too."
The boy just shook his head. "Frost told me enough! Girls are the root of all evil!" he spat, unable to keep the acid out of his voice just as Frost had taught him to. "Just like Eve, all sin comes from them!"
Remy saw right through it all. Julien was clinging so hard to his past, he just didn't want to let it go even as the thief was tearing it apart like tissue paper. "Yo' momma wasn't evil. She love you."
"Yes she was!" Julien spat, scrubbing his skin all the harder as though trying to wash his own DNA from his skin. Still, Remy could already see the boy's faith wavering. His love for his mother was still there, it was just buried deep.
Remy just shook his head with an ironic smile. "Now you don' believe dat any more dan you do about Kiden. If dat was true, fils, you wouldn't 'ave took Kiden apart fo' y'self. You woulda let 'er whore fo' Frost's boys wit' de res' of de girls."
Julien looked at him in fury, obviously upset and distressed that he was running out of excuses. He fell back on what he knew. "You're all unclean! This whole place is full of sinners and freaks! You - you contaminate me with your lies and blasphemy!"
Remy sloshed over to the boy and took his hands before he rubbed himself raw. He was already bleeding in some areas from being so rough. Being in private like this, Remy dared to use his empathy and sent out a wave of calming Kundatesh, hoping that the boy would feel the sincerity of it. "I can see in yo' shine what you believe and what you don'. You love yo' momma, she done de bes' she could fo' you even if it wasn't always right. You love Kiden real deep even though she don' love you back. You also know dat you been lied to. De bes' lie is one wit' a little trut' mixed in, dat's why Frost made it all so easy fo' you. You gotta let 'im go, fils.
"I know you hate what you are. Dat ain't nuthin' new around here. You just gotta have some kinda fait' dat God knows what He's doin'. He made you a mutant because it was right and good for what His big plan is, whatever it may be. You got a home now wit' us and maybe if you let us, we can 'elp you figure out just what dat plan is, eh? We can do dat together."
Julien sagged against him, wet and exhausted from everything. He had felt Remy's power wrap around him as tangibly as the arms that held him. It reminded him of his mother and of everything he had loved and lost and it hurt him more than he could say. It took the last of his strength and his will to fight. He had been abandoned and abused by everyone he had ever come across. Who could he possibly trust? He had nothing left. "Just kill me or lock me away! I don't think I can do this anymore..."
Remy held him, knowing all of this just by the boy's shine, and gently brushed wet hair from the boy's eyes. Julien was all bones and shivers now, his heart breaking. He wasn't struggling against Remy's attentions but protested weakly, "I can't take this any more! Everything I say, you keep telling me is wrong! I don't even know what's real anymore..."
Remy just laughed softly. "I know it hurt sometime, seein' de trut' wit' yo' eyes wide open fo' de first time. But you gotta accept de fact dat if Frost was capable of cold blooded murder, dat a little lyin' 'ere and dere wasn't much of a stretch fo' de guy, eh? Not if it could get you and de other kids to do what he want."
"He loved me!" Julien cried, still unwilling to fully believe. "I know he did!"
"Mebbe in 'is way, 'e did jus' a little," Remy was grudgingly willing to concede. "But you gotta ask yo'self, was it in a good way? In a real way? You wanna know what's real for true? Dis is." And then Remy gave him a nice good squeeze. "You my son and I'm gonna love you whether you want me to or not. Dat's real. You ain't never goan hafta pay me no pound of flesh neither to earn it – no starvin' yo'self, no straps wit barbs, no hatin' anybody else, none of dat crap. Kimble love you, too. Him and Aiden bot'. Dat's real. 'Dey would never hurt you, you gotta b'lieve dat."
"I'm so sorry..." Julien gasped, tears pouring down his cheeks now. He was barely standing, emotionally undone. He knew the words were true even as Remy spoke them.
"I ain't de one you need to be sayin' dat to," Remy said, holding him up and gently walking him to the water's edge. Remy was still stiff and sore and this wasn't helping but he wasn't going to let the boy go, not until they found a place to sit.
They sat there, the boy shivering while Remy removed his long coat and draped the dry parts over the lad's shoulders. He was continuing to instruct, saying, "M' gonna teach you sumpt'in, a lesson fo' life, fo' always. When someone tell you sumpt'in in anger or 'atred, don't ever trust it, 'specially when it about sumpt'in you know nuthin' about. Lots of folks out dere say all us muties're bad. Now we know ourselves enough to know dat while some of us do try to 'urt people, de vast majority of us are kind and just want to live our lives in peace. Some of us are even heroes, folks who go outta deir way to 'elp others. You still t'ink all muties are bad, hein?"
Julien shook his head quickly, already seeing where this was going.
Remy continued, "Now dere may be some gay men out dere dat done some bad t'ings, but dat's only just a very tiny few. Mos' gay folks, you wouldn't even know it dey was gay. Dey learn to hide deir love away 'cause of all dis misdirected anger towards dem, just like a lot of us muties gotta hide, too. You t'ink dat's fair?"
"No."
"Now you seein' what I mean? Now you startin' to t'ink a bit more like a real Christian oughta. We all just people just tryin' to get by. You, me, Kim and 'is Dreamer. You gotta judge each person on deir merits, not just from what someone else say, comprenez?"
Julien nodded again, but he was still so very tired. This was all making sense now but still a lot for him to take in all at once. Remy could see this and knew he had precious little time left. He still had one more lesson to teach. "Now dat you got dis better understandin', 'm gonna teach you one more t'ing 'bout Kimble and Aiden. I just needed you make peace with de other bit first before I tell you dis, because of what I just said still stands, d'accorde?"
"Tell me what?"
Remy just smiled a little. "Kim and Aiden, dey ain't like you an' me. Dey machines of a sort dat someone made, only dey come alive for real."
Julien snorted in disbelief and pulled away. He didn't like being toyed with. "Is this some kind of joke?"
"Nope. Not even a little bit. See my boys got two strikes against dem – dey love each other like nuthin' else and at de same time, lots of folks here don't even consider dem alive."
"No machine can be real like that."
Remy laughed again, hearing this for the umpteeth time. "Well you lived in a pocket world. Dat alone should tell you dat dere's lots of places wit t'ings an' people in dem dat most folks here never heard of. You got flown here in a ship dat you know no regular plane maker make. Let's just say dat us Xs have a way of gettin' around to some real strange places. One of dem places was called Siska and a long time ago, dey made fake people to be deir servants. One day dem servants got smart and dat's what happened to m' boys. We call dem Siskans now after de race of people dat made dem."
"That sounds impossible."
"Does it? Makes perfect sense to me. Somebody first had a job dat needed doin' so dey make a machine dat move dis to dere." Remy gestured with his hands to make his point, showing a robot picking up something and setting it down. "De next guy make it faster. De next guy after dat make it smarter. De guy after him make it look a person to make it easier to use. Fella after 'im give it emotion, to make it act human, not jus' look like one, comprenez? You see where dis is goin'?"
Julien nodded, getting that easily enough.
"Den one day, de machine actually do get faster. It do get smarter for real. It actually become alive. Sentient, like you and me. Now it livin' out 'ere wit us, and we jus', well...some of us still see de machine when it ain't really no machine no more. Dat's one problem. De other problem is dat people judge Kimble and Aiden like dey was men when dey really ain't. Dey still dat machine inside and lemmie ask you – is a machine a boy or a girl?"
Julien just squinted, blinking at him. "What?"
"It's a simple question, fils. Is a machine a boy or a girl?"
"It's neither."
"Exactly."
Again, Julien just squinted at him. "Okay, now you lost me."
"M' boys are boys only cuz someone made dem look dat way, not because dey was born dat way, or because dey boys in deir minds. Deir outside a skin dat can be changed to look different ways, but inside dey feel de same all de time. Now you get it?"
"Oh? Oh! Oh...Oh, okay. I get it. Sort of..." Julien squinted. "They aren't really gay because they aren't alive like us."
"Dat is true, but I needed you to understand about gay people first cause like I said, dat lesson still stand, get me? Nobody gay ever gonna hurt you. Neither will any of de Siskans livin' 'ere."
Julien nodded, trying to process it all. "Wait. Asher said he and Kimble were from the same place. Does that mean he isn't real either?"
Again, Remy laughed. "Depends on yo' definition of real. Dey ain't got no flesh or blood, dey can't make babies of demselves, but dey hearts and souls are real enough. De bes' way to judge a man is by what he feel and what he do. And dey do feel plenty."
Julien bowed his head, his heart sinking just a little. Yeah, he knew Kimble could feel alright. In his mind he replayed their last encounter and he fast forwarded over what Kimble and Aiden been dong to the part where Kimble had looked so devastated at what he had said to him. How Kimble had looked so hurt and betrayed. The thought of it made his chest hurt a little. "I have to apologize to Kimble."
Remy was glad to hear it. He was also glad to see the colors changing in Julien's shine. He was letting go of that destructive anger. He was smoothing out, becoming much closer to normal, a welcome change. There was hope for the boy yet. "Oui, you do. De sooner de better, fils, so we can all put dis behind us. Kimble got a real big heart, I know he will forgive you if you mean it."
Julien nodded and they rose, the boy moving just as stiffly as his father. Gambit didn't miss it. "Let's go back to m' place, get you all dried off. Mebbe you sleep a bit, den we'll go see Kimble, oui?"
Julien nodded, feeling exhausted down to his very bones. Remy walked him back to his apartment and lay the boy down on his own bed, not surprised when the kid was out after just a couple of minutes. The moment he knew the lad was asleep he gave Asher a quick call, satisfied when he learned that Kimble had been taken care of as well. After the boy had his nap, he would bring him to see Kimble and they could put all this behind them, once and for all.