Evil Lambert
An Adam Lambert Story
By Eva Britney Rosa
Chapter 1
Adam Lambert was in the middle of a meet and greet with a group of fans. They'd come here in a group, so he wasn't about to get them alone individually to do the exact same thing.
All the fans were men this time, except for me. I had dark-brown hair, dark-brown eyes, caramel-colored skin tone, my eyes were ground, and I had a celestial nose, disproportionate, but kinda meaty lips and less-than-perfect teeth.
This wasn't my first concert ever, but it was my first Adam Lambert concert. I had been to a Menudo concert back when they tried to revive Menudo in 2007, which was epic fail, I had been to the concert of my lifetime idol, Ricky Martin, whom I'd been a hardcore fan of since 1988, and I had been to a Rihanna concert. I loved those people so much that I had to show it to them by spending money on a concert ticket and a VIP pass just to get to look them in the eyes for a few minutes and see their smiles, just to know what kind of impression I was capable of causing them, since my immediately family members had never precisely admired me for anything.
"Eva," Christina said, walking toward us. "I'm back. I just had to see Adam in concert again, but this time I did buy a VIP pass!"
Adam turned around and with difficulty I walked a few steps toward Christina, following him. My legs were becoming sore and tired for standing up too long and it was about time for me to get back on my manual wheelchair. I had to go back to manual wheelchairs and dump my pretty power chair because I felt the use of the power chair was making my condition deteriorate. I had ataxic cerebral palsy, but that was about it. They'd taken care of the spasticity in my legs and in my arms six months before, and for age thirty, my recovery process had been speedy compared to how it was when they performed operations to fix my cleft feet.
"Hey," he said after several minutes of silence, "aren't you 'mysticdragon75,' that fan everyone's always telling me about that creates fan videos of me and has nearly 2,000 subscribers that always crave the content?"
Christina laughed and her face started acquiring the color of a tomato.
I smiled. This was my first time meeting her in person, but we'd been interacting online for over seven months now, so to me it was like we'd met in person from the very start of our friendship.
She hugged me. Out of curiosity, she just had to ask, "Why, have you seen any of my videos?"
"To be honest, there are too many for me to look at in one sitting, but I did see a couple. I had to laugh my ass off at the 'S&M' one." He laughed again. "I mean you don't really think I'm like that in my moments of intimacy, in my bedroom, do you? I know you guys tend to get carried away when you imagine me in those situations, but I only do that for your entertainment! I mean if I were that merciless to my glitter-baby, he would've dumped me a long time ago because a human being can only take so much torment without deciding they've had enough!"
The guys laughed and they couldn't stop taking pictures of Adam and Christina to show to their family members.
Sebastian's little sister was an avid fan of both Adam Lambert and the incredible mysticdragon75.
"Adam's right. I know it's a fanatical thing, but come on, as someone that's only a few months older than him, I understand you guys do get carried away. Not me I mean when I daydream of Adam Lambert I daydream about me rendering his songs, not…"
The guys believed every word, and that is why they laughed their asses off at that comment. All of our attention had to go to them. How romantic could a woman be? What sane person didn't have scorching sexual fantasies with his or her favorite rock star? I had to be every bit as crazy as Adam seemed to be. In their minds, why didn't we just get it over with, get married and be together forever? We seemed to be such a perfect match when it came to our personalities. We both seemed to be so angel-like people couldn't help but to fall in love with us in a non-sexual way because of how sweet we were, and we were both more hyperactive than a puppy under the effects of LSD.
"Damn, then I guess I'm going to have to invite you as a guest to my next concert. You could open or close the show for me. What do you say?"
"I'd love to except that's why I solely daydream about it and I don't even dare to upload videos of me rendering your songs in YouTube, because I'm tone deaf."
The guys laughed again and then looked at each other. Who in their right mind would admit to being tone deaf while at the same time dreaming all the time of being a professional singer?
"I am not going to believe that until you perform at my next concert. I'm going to play American-idol judge and decide if you're tone-deaf or not."
The guys started chanting, "Si-mon, Si-mon, Si-mon," over and over and Christina and I laughed our asses off.
"That's funny because that's the first judge I thought about when the idea occurred to me to do this."
Sebastian screamed, "Oh, shit!" and then covered his own mouth.
Adam walked closer to him with a smile on his face. "Damn, you seem like you could be part of my team!"
"I'd give anything to be part of your anything." Only Adam could make Sebastian this child-like.
"Is that right?" Adam placed his arm around Sebastian and the guys started howling as if cheering them on. Then, Adam's hand went down all the way to Sebastian's buttocks and squeezed the left one, making Sebastian shut his eyes tight and open them again, blushing, with this child-like grin on his face.
The guys screamed and they couldn't stop laughing. Sebastian had impressed his idol too much and their minds raced thinking about what was going to happen next.
Dave said, "Damn, you guys…"
Adam smiled. "Your friend here is mighty fan, and I can tell he loves me! Come on, guys, it's not like you wouldn't take this golden opportunity if you were in my shoes. It's not every day a fan gets to show his or her favorite superstar how he or she feels." Adam kissed Sebastian's left cheek, making him quiver. "He hasn't said a word to me yet and I see it in his eyes. He loves me."
Sebastian blurted out, "Te amo" before even getting to think it through first.
"Oh, si?" Adam said. "Wow, that's great! My fantasy's going to come true after all!" Adam burst out laughing. He whispered in Sebastian's ear, "I want to get you alone right now! I want you!"
We didn't notice what Adam had just done if Sebastian hadn't started shedding tears.
We focused on him wondering what was eating him now.
"I can't help it. I just love this man. I love him and it's more than fanatical. It's funny because I've never been in love with another man before. I've had to turn down a few dudes in the past, proclaiming I'm not into that sorta thing."
"Are you implying you might go gay for me, you sexy little thing? Mmm, you know something?" Adam licked his earlobe without anyone really seeing it. "I want some."
Sebastian had to get Adam alone. Adam was coming on to him too strong for him to ignore…
Or was he?
Was Adam Lambert trying to perpetuate that sex-god kind of image that he'd carried on with since he finished everything pertaining to American Idol 8?
Sebastian had to know. "Are you for real?"
Adam laughed. "No, it's just fan service."
"Oh, I was starting to become frightened a little bit there because I don't have lustful feelings for you. I do love you, but it's not all about the physical you know? If I admired only your looks, I wouldn't bother to come to your concerts. This is not my first concert."
"I saw you in 2010 in one of my concerts but it seems you didn't get a VIP pass because we never got to shake hands."
"I couldn't afford a VIP pass to anyone's concerts then. I'm a rock star now, just so you know, but I am in both sides, fan and rock star at the same time."
"You're like me in that aspect. I love going to Mama Monster's concerts, and Katy Perry's. When they're on that stage, they're my idols again, and only become my friends again when they get off that stage and we hang out."
"Do you go to Kesha's concerts, too?"
"Sometimes, when I have a day off—you guys have to know, I'm just like you, too. I'm human. Adam Mitchel Lambert needs his fun, too, needs to feel human again, party, have a good time every once in a while, have a holiday."
"I can't help asking, how is Sauli?"
"Sauli is sick with horrible body aches. He cried because he couldn't come to my concert with me. He loves being my audience member and enjoying my…" Adam started to cry, but in silence. "I'm sorry."
"Body aches?" Sebastian asked. "What is that about?"
We'd been left waiting for them a little too long, so we started following their trail.
"I don't know all of a sudden he started getting these body aches. He just went to the doctor today. They have to run some tests to find out if it's a condition or if someone's been abusing him physically."
"Have you seen bruises anywhere in his body? I'm sorry if I'm diving too deep, Adam, but I love him, too."
"I know. All of my fans love Sauli, and with good reason…I'm afraid I'm going to lose him, Sebastian. I love him. He's in pain all the time and I don't know what's—" Adam's cell phone interrupted him.
Adam walked a few steps away from Sebastian to take the call.
We caught up with Sebastian.
"Hello."
"Adam, this is Sauli."
Adam noticed the joyful tone in his voice and couldn't help smiling. "How are you feeling, my love?"
We smiled all at the same time and looked at each other.
"I'm feeling much better. I was given medicine for my pain. My best friend, Fred, gave me the medicine. Remember that guy we met like three weeks ago? Well he noticed I could hardly talk to him the last time he called a few hours ago, I told him about my pains and he brought me some medicine. I'm sorry I didn't tell you that I had a terrible fall down the stairs of our apartment complex the other day."
"Were you pushed?"
"That's exactly what I didn't want you to think, Adam. I don't know, I got up too early one morning over three months ago, I was too tired, and it occurred to me to go down the stairs to buy a celebrity-gossip magazine to see if they'd said anything new about us, and my foot betrayed me, I tripped and down the stairs I went."
"Are you sure? Are you sure someone's not threatening you into lying to me?"
"I'm sure, Adam. Who in this apartment complex would want to do something this terrible to me? Everybody loves me."
"I know my fans do, but…"
"Adam, just leave it alone. I know, I know I haven't told you everything, but this is not something that can be talked casually over the phone. We need to get away, far, far away from here, and talk."
"We're going to. Just give me a few more minutes. I'm not done with my meet and greet. I have to take care of every single one of these lovely fans."
"Don't tell them anything about this, please. I don't want them flooding Facebook and Twitter with sad messages about me."
"They're not going to have to. I'm going to take care of you. I'm sorry I didn't investigate this matter further when I noticed all of a sudden I couldn't see you naked under any circumstances. I'll be right there."
Adam signed autographs for over 200 fans that night, even some fans that hadn't gotten enough money for a VIP pass from the very start, and then he got back home to the love of his life, but he didn't settle or get comfortable there.
That morning, Adam and Sauli traveled to Finland just for a few days. Adam was fortunate to not have to cancel anything that he had scheduled for the month of July 2012.
They were alone in a five-star hotel room in Finland, and they'd only brought one suitcase for each one of them. They wouldn't be here long.
"Are you sure that now you feel safe enough to tell me everything you've been hiding? I want to know who did this to you and why, Sauli."
"It's not what you're thinking, nothing like that, I promise. I didn't mess with some super-powerful mafia lord or loan shark. It was a fan that is obsessed with you, so obsessed he wants you for himself."
"He lives in our apartment complex."
"Yes, he does."
"What did he say before pushing you down the stairs, Sauli?" Adam couldn't hold his tears in.
Sauli caressed his face. "He said you were meant to be with him and that I didn't deserve someone like you, that you were more of a match for him because if you beat him up, he would defend himself, dump you and then get back with you like nothing happened."
"He thinks I don't love you, that I'm just using you and you're too deep in love to dump me no matter what I do."
"That's right."
"You know that's not true, and I reckon I made a terrible mistake. You had good faith in me when you gave me another chance."
"I don't regret it, you know."
"I know, Sauli, because as long as I don't mess up again, you're not going anywhere, because you love me, and you know something? I love you, too. I'm going to take you to the hospital and they're going to take care of those injuries. I want you well again. I'm worried. On my way home the day before yesterday, I cried for you."
They hugged.
Chapter 2
One month later…
Sauli returned to America recovered from all his injuries. He had left them unattended, hiding his near-death incident for far too long.
Sauli started to cry when he saw a man he mistook for Adam Lambert in the arms of a woman.
It was when the man turned around that he could differentiate his love from this look alike. The man wasn't wearing any make up at all to conceal freckles and his hair was naturally black. His eyes were brown, not blue, like Adam Lambert's, and Sauli saw this when he started screaming at him, confronting him.
"Damn, I'm going to have to get radical plastic-surgery procedures on my face! Being almost identical to that American-Idol guy is becoming a nightmare!"
Trembling, Sauli said, "I'm sorry, I am so, so sorry…"
"You don't have to apologize, man. People actually have to take a good look at my face to differentiate me from Adam Lambert."
The girl said, "We're so sorry. We're from LA, too, and Marcus was on his way to his book tour. He's a writer, but he's just starting out. He's an ESL person, so…"
Sauli asked, "You're Latino?"
Marc said, "Yes, I am, and proud of it. Look man, I know our physical appearance is not unique. We're all bound to look just like two or three different people. I have my fair share of friends that look almost identical to three or four other guys that live in our same city!"
"Except for you it's worse because you look like a rock star," Sauli pointed out.
"Exactly," Marcus said. "I'm starting to regret it."
"Look, this is the way you were born. I don't think you should alter your appearance because of this misunderstanding."
"Don't think this has been the sole incident, Sauli," the girl said. "An Adam-Lambert detractor tried to pry into Marc's eyes the other day convinced my boyfriend was really Adam Lambert disguising his identity with brown-colored contact lenses. Marc had to get an operation to try to reverse the damage done to his eyes. We were fortunate that doctors were able to save Marc's eyesight, but Marc has considered minimal plastic surgery for a long time to be more-easily told apart from Adam Lambert."
Hearing his name and noticing his look alike, Adam blurted out, "Get on with it and send me the bill! I'll pay for it in full!"
When Marc turned around to look this guy in the eyes, and while Sauli gave Adam a bear hug, the men shook hands, leaving everyone around them speechless. Some people were as far as to take photos of both men together. They'd never seen anyone look this much like Adam Lambert before. "It's very nice to meet you, double."
"Likewise, but I hear being my double is not exactly the best thing that's ever happened to you, and what makes it much worse is that it's not like you went and got a plastic-surgery procedure done to look just like me, that you were born this way, looking like this and what you have to do is get procedures done to look less like me just so people can tell us apart and stop hurting you."
"Exactly."
"Well, that's why I said send me the bill. I am going to give you my contact card and your plastic surgeon can contact me to get everything started."
"I think it'll suffice for me to have a nose job and reshape my eyes a little bit."
Paying special attention to Marc's face, Adam thought it over for a few minutes and said, "Yes, that's right. I think those procedures will do the trick."
Before leaving with Adam, Sauli asked Marc, out of curiosity, "Hey, Marcus, how do you say I love you in Spanish?"
"Meaning what?"
"When you say I love you to your girlfriend, how do you say it?"
"I say to her Te amo."
"I like the way that sounds," Sauli said and repeated the phrase, "Te amo," looking Adam in the eyes.
Adam and Sauli shared a kiss in front of the people that were staring, and people took photos of them. Then they left. That ought to show them!
Marc got on with his business and Adam and Sauli went back home. Adam was inflamed. He waited for Sauli to go to the kitchen and prepare a random snack for them.
Adam Lambert snuck out of his apartment. He had to confront this son of a bitch that almost killed the love of his life in one of the cruelest manners ever. The man had shown him unwanted affection in the past when Sauli wasn't anywhere to be seen, so he knew who he was looking for. He walked to that man's apartment and knocked the door. He wasn't too loud or brute because he didn't want the man to know he was a threat to him from the very start. If the man wanted to play dirty, no problem, Adam Lambert could play dirty, too, except when Adam Lambert was this angry, his target wound up severely hurt.
Or very well dead…
The man opened the door. He had just come home from work. "Hello, Adam," the man said, hand on his left hip. "What's the style? I thought you wanted nothing to do with me." He thought, Could he have found out about what I did to Koskinen? No. If he had, he would've punched my face in from the moment I opened the door.
"I can't believe you'd do this. What's with you? What kind of monster have you turned into?" Adam made his way in seeing no objection in the man's part. "When we met you were the nicest, sweetest guy. I don't know why you're trying to get me back, but by hurting Sauli, all you're doing is making me hate you, which is something I've never felt for you."
"You never loved me, either, did you, Adam?"
"Yes, I did. I loved you way too much as a matter of fact because I got depressed when you denied me in front of the whole world, insisting you were a family man and we were just friends. Oh, yeah, you and I were just friends!" Adam turned Kris around and placed his arm around his neck, resembling the gesture of a boa constrictor. "You tried to forget everything that happened between us, or at least that's what you tried to make me believe, that you had moved on after using me for your sexual pleasure and self-discovery, Allen. Now it turns out you want me back and you're trying to get my boyfriend, the love of my life, out of the way."
Kris tried to break free, but Adam's hold only became tighter and it wasn't exactly sexy. "What are you trying to do, kill me?"
"Oh, so you're kinda having flashbacks of what you would say to me every time we were making love, huh, Kris? You would scream, 'What are you trying to do, Adam, kill me?'"
"Adam, this isn't fair. I'm going to call the police."
Adam hit Kris hard on the lower back with his knee, right in the zone of his kidneys.
Kris got knocked down and the pain was so great he couldn't even scream, just lie down in fetal position and take it like a real man.
Adam kneeled down and said, "If you call the police on me for this, I'm going to get Sauli to press charges against you! I'm the one that persuaded him not to do it, telling him perhaps you weren't thinking straight, or you were high on meth or something, and you didn't know what you were doing, that you had no real reason to attack him the way you did! I can just as easily tell him to press charges against you. We have too much proof against you for you to get away with it if we make that move. You are going to lie down in your comfy bed, get over this, just as you got over me, and…"
"I didn't get over you, Lambert, that's the problem!"
Adam was secretly recording the incident with a miniature video camera that he'd bought at the store just minutes before picking up Sauli at the airport.
"I did mean to do everything I did. I wanted him out of the way so we could be together again!"
"It's not going to happen again! I only take an ex back when whatever it was that we had ended in good terms, and as far as I could remember, I beat your ass when you broke up with me and demanded that I get over what happened between us! Do you remember that, Kristopher Allen? Do you remember going to the hospital after I pounced on your stank ass like a mafia lord? You had to tell everyone that it was a slip and fall accident in the bathroom and you hit your body against everything: the sink, the toilet, the marble bathtub…"
"Adam, are you ever going to forgive me?"
"That's the problem, Allen, that I did! I got over everything because I can take rejection fairly well. Yes, it takes me a while, but eventually it sinks in, that you were just there for the sake of a straight man's experimentation! It seems you've forgotten all those times I almost killed you making love to you, taking total control of you. Perhaps I was too rough because while I broke your body all those times, you broke my heart!"
Kris got up. "Adam Mitchel, calm down."
Walking closer and closer to Kris, and Kris pulling farther and farther back, Adam said, fists clenched, "I'm about to push you off the damned balcony, motherfucker!"
"Adam, I'm sorry for what I did to—"
"You could scorn as many gay men as you want to, you false Christian man! That's your problem! You're the one that's going to have to deal with the God you claim to adore and serve for doing that shit, not me! I don't scorn men. I let them know straight up how it's going to be from the very beginning! You fed Sauli a whole bunch of bullshit, making me out to be more like you, you son of a bitch!"
"What are you talking a—"
"Sauli told me everything, dick wad! He said you told him that I was a dominant gay male that used thinner men like him for his own pleasure and then I abused those men, and the proof was in what happened between me and Sauli in that gay bar in Helsinki!"
Sauli trespassed Kris' apartment. He had to. He had to ask Kris why, why he would do this to him if he and Adam had been together a long time ago and Kris blew his one and only chance, making it way too late to fix this mistake. "Why, Kris? Why did you do this to me? What did I ever do to you, man? I didn't even know you in person. That's how bad it ended, what you had, that I don't know what it was!"
Chapter 3
Kris ran backwards forgetting he was on the edge of the balcony!
That forced Adam and Sauli to forget about everything that had been going on, just for a few moments and go after him to save him from certain death that he didn't even see coming.
"Kris, don't do this. You don't have to do this for me, come on…"
"It hurts, doesn't it, Lambert?" Kris said, the truth of where he was sinking in, and caressing those bars in a suicide-threatening gesture. "It hurts to know someone loves you enough to kill themselves for you, right?"
"There's no reason. What we had ended over two years ago, almost three! Why are you doing this? Why do you want to destroy me and Sauli? We're so happy together despite everything! Why does it hurt you so much? Why is it impossible for you to just move on with your life?"
"Because I love you, Adam Lambert!"
"No, you don't! You became obsessed with an ex lover from a long time ago, too fucking long ago! What's with you? Are you brain-damaged? Have you had no life since July 2009 that everything came to an end? Were you in a fucking coma all this time and you woke up? Who the fuck was this guy that released 'Live Like We're Dying' in 2010 that incited a feud between our fans that was never a fight between the two of us, Kristopher?"
"We loved and fought behind the scenes. Don't you remember that, Lambert?"
Adam almost cried. "Oh, come on, man…"
"Where are we, in the set of 'Days of Our Lives' shooting a scene?" Sauli asked, rolling his eyes.
Adam stretched out his hand. "Come on, Kris, stop playing around and give me your hand. Come on, man!"
"I'm not playing around!" Kris screamed trying to get Adam off and away from him to fall to his death.
"Come on, this is ridiculous! You can't be serious!"
Kris just pulled further back until his body turned around and he fell right on to the ground.
Adam and Sauli started to cry like they had few times in their entire lives.
Sauli couldn't stop asking, "Did the camera record that?"
"That wasn't Kris Allen. It couldn't be Kris Allen! He couldn't have killed himself for me! He couldn't have, please tell me this isn't true!"
But someone had placed an old mattress right where Kris fell and Kris was alive and safe, but frightened. Someone had taken away his memories of his last three years to use him as a weapon against Adam Lambert.
That fall was all it took to make Kris see the truth and get back everything he'd lost. "Oh, my God, what is going on?"
Sauli went right back to the balcony when he heard Kris Allen screaming and crying. Sauli had to make sure he wasn't hallucinating.
Not wanting him to be the next one to fall, Adam ran after him, "Oh, my God, Sauli…!"
Both men were floored when they saw Kris Allen standing tall, straight, and shrugging.
"What's going on here, you guys? What are you even doing here?"
"Oh, my God, he was brainwashed," Sauli said in Finnish having lost all the English vocabulary and grammar he'd learned over the past couple years, out of pure shock. "Someone erased his memories from 2009 to 2012 and made him believe that his relationship with you has just ended, and he's in love with you and he won't accept it, Adam!"
Adam had learned enough Finnish to understand. "Who would do this to Kris Allen? Who wants to tear you and me apart and kill me while they're at it?"
"I don't know, man," Sauli said, "but whoever it is feels pretty-damn strong about it, so we have to run away if we want to stay together. Don't you understand? Adam, they're trying to use our own friends against us! They're trying to kill us."
"We have to destroy this whole plan. It wasn't even Kris Allen that pushed you, but someone that imitated him a little too well. The real Kristopher Neil Allen would never do something like that, even if he still were hung up on me. Yes, he would try to come in between us by seducing me, or you, either way, outcome would be the same—but he'd never try to murder anyone to get what he wants!"
"Adam, if you have faith in Kris Allen and you don't believe it was he that did this to me, then it was his goddamned doppelganger because he didn't wear a mask and he looked identical to Kris Allen. Explain that to me."
"Whoever that's behind all this did a pretty good job at showing us what they were capable of Koskinen. This person almost killed you. Then he or she almost destroyed our relationship. To top it all off, he or she almost killed the real Kris Allen by submerging him in an alternate reality in which his life came to a screeching halt in 2009 and he woke up one morning madly in love with me four months ago. This is sickening. We have to find that person and we have to stop them before it's too late. We're going to have to use the most ancient and effective weapon in the world, one that kills, and it's not precisely a sword, a gun or a knife."
Sauli gasped.
This person had an ill agenda against Adam Lambert and Kris Allen. This person had used the short-lived romance Kris and Adam had as a weapon against them.
She didn't know just how dangerous Adam Lambert and Kris Allen could be when they got hurt and tried to defend themselves.
At that moment, Kris and Adam were trying to come to an agreement and Kris was opening his heart to one of Hollywood's hottest celebrity couples. "There was no doppelganger, Sauli. It was me that pushed you down the stairs. Granted I don't recall the event, but I know it happened. When I want something or someone, there's nothing I wouldn't do or nothing I wouldn't get rid of to get it. I considered you my most-powerful rival for my love for Adam, so I had to eliminate you. I don't know what incited old and ephemeral feelings in me. I never do anything to try to get an ex back. That wasn't the real Kris Allen that you've been interacting with all these months. I was brainwashed. Please don't press charges against me. I promise you I'm the one that's going to move out of here and when I do you'll never see me again."
"Actually, Kristopher, that's not going to work because Sauli and I have totally different plans for you." Adam smiled.
"You know I'd do anything to make it up to you, so just spit it out, Lambert. What do you guys want me to do?"
"Are you willing to compromise everything to show this bozo they've messed with the absolutely wrong people?"
Kris' eyes widened. A few minutes later, he said, "Yes. I'd do anything to make this son of a bitch leave us the hell alone."
Kris, Adam, and Sauli's enemy contacted Kris, thinking he was still under the effects of the Monarch reprogramming she had subjected him to. That was a big mistake. This person didn't know Kris Allen.
Kris pretended to still be under this person's control. He said, "Hello."
Adam and Sauli sat there listening drinking coffee Kris had made for them.
"What are you waiting for to lure and entice that son of a bitch Adam Lambert just like he did you, Kris?"
"I've gotten on it already. He came to my apartment saying he'd do anything to get me to stop hurting Sauli."
The woman smiled. "That is excellent. I just knew you were the perfect agent for this mission. Whom better than an ex lover to destroy such a beautiful and solid relationship and kill both parties involved in the process?"
"You're right, ma'am."
"So what's next? Are you going to end this call and seduce Lambert?"
"I already have. You interrupted us."
Adam and Sauli laughed their asses of together in silence.
Sauli whispered, "What an ass, whoever this is! Kris is an amazing actor! He or she's falling for it!"
Adam couldn't contain his laughter. "Oh, man, this is just like Xtina's song, it keeps getting better!"
They continued laughing.
"Let's see what they're saying!"
"I interrupted you. Good job, Allen. Are you sticking to the original plan?"
"I find I'm sticking to Adam better than to the plan, ma'am."
Adam screamed, "Ohh…" laughing his ass off with Sauli still and feeling the burn in the esophagus and chest caused by the laughing fit.
The woman interpreted it as Adam having had a mega orgasm during masturbation. "That is great how you got that super sex machine going!"
Kris eyed Adam and Sauli, laughing in silence, too. He became serious again to show no signs of normal human behavior. "Yes, ma'am, I find I'm good at that, a little too good."
Adam and Sauli were crying now. They needed some water.
"That's great. Remember the last part of your assignment?"
"Yes, it's to call Koskinen and pretend to want to apologize for what I did to him and when he walks in he catches me and Adam in bed together, naked, doing the things he and Adam can't do because of what I did to Sauli."
Sauli whispered, "Are you really going to contact Marc Leyva to have him seduce Kris and this woman just so you don't have to cheat on me?"
"I'd never cheat on you," Adam whispered. "You've been too good to me for me to do that to you. If I did that I wouldn't deserve to live, Sauli."
"Meeting this double of yours is the best thing that could happen to us! I just hope he hasn't contacted a plastic surgeon yet."
"If he has and the surgeon gets in touch with me, I'll convince him to hold the procedure up just for a little bit, while we execute our plan."
"He said he'd call you when he arrived at Miami."
"Let's just wait for him to call. I hope he doesn't get taken aback when he realizes his plans have changed along with ours. I'd give him payment amount twice as big as his advance and his royalties, but I'm afraid he won't want repayment, that the payment of his medical bills alone will be reward enough for him."
"We don't know Marc Leyva, but that's the kind of man he seems to be. He's so devoted to everyone he loves and so dedicated to his fans because he just started out that I'm afraid this might destroy everything he holds dear. If I didn't know better I'd say he's nothing but a brown-eyed, Latino clone of Adam Lambert."
"Thanks for the compliment! I'm just going to wait for him to call. I'm sure he won't start proceedings right away."
Adam's cell phone rang. He noticed the number that had never called him before. "Oh, this must be he." He took the call. "This is Adam."
"Lambert, I just contacted you to let you know I'm not going through with the procedure, at least not now. The doctors that operated on my eyes a few months ago advised against it. They said if I wanted to look different from Adam Lambert, changing my hair color and my hair consistency, in other words, getting a perm done on my hair, would be more than enough."
"Yes, I remember you said you wanted your eyes reshaped."
"Yes, and the surgeon advised against that because that's going to cause complication and get me to lose my eyesight, something he had to work his ass off to preserve for me."
"I got you. Well, I'm sure there's another less-invasive procedure we could consider that could tell us apart better than the simple differences of eye colors. However, Marcus, I'm going to have to ask you to put your plans on hold. There is something I need you to do for me first, and if my very life and my loved one's lives didn't depend on it, I swear to you I'd never ask."
Chapter 4
"What do you want me to do? I know you'd never ask me to sleep with you because you ought to know I'm no gigolo."
Adam laughed. "Hell no, sleep with me? No! In order for me to sleep with a straight man, he'd have to initiate the whole thing. Besides I'd feel like I'm sleeping with my identical twin. That's damn disgusting. However I'm afraid you're going to have to at least seduce someone else, our enemy, and you're going to have to usurp me."
"I will as long as you don't press charges."
"Marc, I'd be the biggest motherfucker in the world if I authorized you to usurp my identity, live my life for one day, used you for my personal vendetta, and then turned around and gave you in to the authorities saying it was all your doing! I'm not like that! I'm evil, but I am not a total son of a bitch. I have thoughts, I have judgment and when I go to do something that macabre, they always get in the way."
"Kind of like what happens in the 'Better Than I Know Myself' music video. Evil Adam almost kills Good Adam and when he notices both he and Good Adam are dying and it'll never work, he kicks and breaks the glass and saves Good Adam's life only to be integrated into him in the end."
"Exactly. That was a good plotline for the video if you will because Adam Mitchel Lambert faces that Dr. Jekyll vs. Mr. Hyde situation every single day."
"Who is it I have to enamor? I'd enamor a man, no problem. I'm just…"
"It starts with a woman, but if she has a boyfriend or a husband, you're going to have to seduce and bed them both, tearing them apart forever, just like she tried to do to me and Sauli by placing Kris Allen right in the middle of us."
Marc felt nauseated.
"Are you okay, Leyva?"
"Yes, I'm fine. I just started to get a little sick there."
"I don't blame you. I'm trying to understand this whole shit myself and having a hard time."
"Who could have the mind to do something like this?"
"Only the biggest motherfucker of all time could."
"So when I finish this book signing, I can…"
"Yes, as soon as you get that book signing done, we want you to fly back here because our enemies live here."
"I got it. I can't wait to meet this monster."
"I fear it's a lady that looks nothing like a real monster, so you're going to have to be careful not to fall in love with her, Marc. She's a praying mantis."
"You can say that again. I'll talk to you first thing tomorrow morning, Adam when I arrive at LAX."
"Don't forget your blue contact lenses." Adam hung up.
Sauli shook his head no.
Adam looked at him. "Something wrong?"
"This is unbelievable. I'm seeing a side of you I never thought I would. I mean it's one thing to get drunk out of your mind and scream and insult me for no reason, and then get high and start destroying things, treating everyone like trash, and…but this…this Adam Mitchel…you know something? I'm starting to fear you with every fiber of my being. I do not want to get on your bad side, provoke that demon."
"I'd never hurt someone I've loved in the past, unless they stabbed me in the back, and you know, now that you tell me that I'm starting to get the feeling that I know this person already. This has got to be one of my ex lovers or flings. These are crimes of passion she's committing. She's using sex to get people killed. This is downright gruesome."
"Who could it be, though? Female? No way. I mean…"
"It's either that or an ex lover is using her to hurt me, to destroy me. Some ex lover got in contact with an incalculably dangerous and deadly woman and he's using her to kill everyone I hold dear to drive me to suicide."
"I know you're merely defending yourself here, but man…"
"Exactly, if they fight this dirty, I will fight back, and although I'd never done anything like this before, I am going to be the victor."
"Like you've never gotten anything right after doing it the very first time. Remember your first performance in American Idol 8? You turned those judges into freaking robots, getting them to repeat you were the best and you would win the competition."
"It's too bad I ruined that."
"Oh, come off it, Allen. You didn't ruin my chances of getting that crown, my gayness did."
Sauli burst out laughing. He still didn't get how someone's sexual orientation determined everything in that person's life.
"I would do it all again and lose to you again. I have very little regrets, and this is not one of them. I'm going to show those assholes not to fuck with Adam Lambert ever again."
Several hours later, Marc Leyva arrived at Natalie Birmingham's house. Natalie's husband, Rafe Birmingham was home.
She wasn't.
This turned out better than Marc thought, and if he called up Adam telling him how this had started out, Adam would faint.
Rafe opened the door.
Marc's first thought was, Fuck, I'd go gay for this prick too any day of the week! What a hot, hot piece of ass! His false blue eyes were brighter than the sun. "Hello, I am Adam Lambert," he said, smiling. "I canceled a performance I had today of my new single, Trespassing, to talk to you guys for a second, to talk to you and Mrs. Birmingham."
"My wife is not home, but your mere name, Mr. Idol, entitles you to come in and make yourself comfortable."
Marc made his way in. "Thank you."
They sat in the living room. Marc acted the way he assumed Adam would've acted in this situation, sitting right beside Rafe. He cleared his throat when he saw the gay porn flick Rafe was enjoying. "Quite the freak you turned out to be, Mr. Birmingham!"
Rafe turned everything off. "This is nothing but unrealized fantasies."
"So you would watch it, but you wouldn't do it," Marc said, caressing Rafe's thigh like he was a natural gay man with multiple same-sex experiences behind him. He hadn't even gotten tips. He had only crashed into porn by accident, via pop ups on his computer several years ago when the Internet became available to the general public. He was twenty-five then, forty now. He was confident the age difference between him and Adam Lambert would tell them apart.
Not a chance.
Trembling, Rafe said, "What are you doing? Why?"
"Don't you remember what happened between us two years ago, Rafe, before I met Sauli?"
"Why are you trying to revive—" a sudden orgasm made him swallow his words.
"When I got home last night, Sauli was gone, leaving behind nothing but a shattered and torn picture of the two of us."
"Adam, I thought I was only a—"
"So did I. If our partners are jealous of us," he kept kissing and nibbling at the man's ear, making him cry, "it's because they see a threat in their relationships with us."
"So you're trying to restart your relationship with me knowing I was just a fling just because I was the one before S—"
The men kissed.
Marc was an expert at showing feelings he didn't have. While he'd never had a problem with same-sex liaisons, actually doing it still made him queasy. He didn't plan to go all the way, though. All he wanted to do was to make Natalie think Rafe was cheating with ex-lover Adam Lambert.
But once again, Adam had other plans, and he'd made it clear just by sending Kris over—Kris being bisexual and not straighter than a pole, like Marc was.
Marc gave the biggest breath of his life when he saw Kris Allen coming their way through Rafe's window. I'm doubting further interaction with Adam Lambert! The fucking devil straight from the pits of hell knows too damn well what the fuck he's doing! "I don't know what Kris is doing here. We've been over for a long, long time."
Rafe looked out the window and saw Kris Allen close to his front door. "Don't let him in."
"This is not my house, sweetheart. If you don't want him to come in, he won't." Marc seemed to forget Adam was calling all the shots, not him. Kris and Marc had become nothing but Lambert's cohorts in this macabre plan.
Kris kicked the door open with a rifle in his hand. He came across them in the living room. "Nobody fucking move," he threatened both men with the gun, kicking the front door shut. "Lambert, I can't believe you're cheating on Sauli with me and this worthless piece of shit at the same time! What the fuck has gotten into you?"
Rafe tried to escape but Kris made him trip right into his leg, making him drop to the ground and hit his head with the edge of his own coffee table. This didn't kill Rafe, it just stunned him. He didn't hit his temple. "Ah…"
Marc lip synced, "What's next?"
Kris handed him a note that said, Go to the bathroom and get naked. I promise you'll have to go no further than that. I'll do all the work. Your job is to pretend we had a threesome with this bitch. Adam made the decision when he noticed you were straight and not bi.
Marc nodded and strutted out of the living room, to the hallway, all the way to the hallway bathroom.
Kris helped Rafe get up. "I'm sorry. I haven't been myself lately."
"Why did you come in here with a gun?"
"The gun's just to scare Adam."
"Why do you want to scare Adam?"
"Could you offer me some coffee, please? I didn't sleep very well last night dreaming sexy things about Lambert. God, I so want that again!"
"He's sexy, isn't he?"
"He oozes sex everywhere. You ought to know that when you know he's the only man to ever turn you gay."
"So you didn't know you were bi until you met him."
"Everybody says it's too romantic to be true, but it is true, Rafe. Those things happen."
"I've been hiding a sick secret from my wife. I don't love her anymore. I have a gay lover."
"Who is he?"
"He's you, Kris."
Kris turned serious. "I don't understand."
"I've always wanted you, not Adam," Rafe said, caressing his face. "I feel that if I ever touch Adam Lambert, I'm going to wind up dead before the sex act is even over."
"Believe me, I know the feeling."
They kissed.
"It feels safer with you than it does with him." Rafe got up and went to the kitchen.
Rafe made coffee for everybody and served it in the coffee table. Kris didn't waste time to spike it with ecstasy to make Rafe look like the dominant gay in this threesome he and Marc were about to stage with Rafe.
Natalie was coming home soon.
More like in a matter of minutes.
Oh, boy…it seemed like Adam was this superior entity that knew everything that was going to happen at exact timing if he was ever involved.
Kris and Rafe drank the coffee and all of a sudden, Rafe didn't feel like himself. He became someone he had never been.
Rafe attacked Kris and rather than showing fear, he enjoyed it when Rafe tore off his pants and his boxers and practiced wild oral sex on him.
Rafe dragged Kris to the bedroom where he slept every night with his wife. Marc was lying on that bed, covered with the sheets, naked, asleep, pretending to be worn out after excessive sexual activity that had just taken place.
"Look at him," Rafe said, climbing into bed, "he looks just like an angel."
Marc woke up. "Oh…" and shared a kiss with Rafe.
Natalie walked in on all three men naked and Rafe getting dressed, witnessing an act of anal sex Kris was performing on now subdued Rafe. She screamed, "Oh, my God, Rafael, what the hell are you doing? You're cheating on me with the most perverted American-Idol men on the entire planet!" at the top of her lungs and started attacking the men who could do nothing else sensible but running away from her.
Marc said, "Look, lady, we're nothing but puppets in the most twisted plot ever! I'm not Adam Lambert." He took off his contacts, making a high Rafe laugh his ass off like he never had before. "I'm just a Latino look-alike, very straight by the way, but your husband is too sexy and he turned me queer. What was I supposed to do, say no? He's damn hot, look at him!"
"Adam-Lambert and Kris-Allen look-alikes, you can both have him."
Kris said, "I'm the real Kris Allen. You can talk to the real Adam Lambert on the phone if you like."
"I have nothing to say to that son of a bitch!" Natalie wailed.
"Oh, no, you have nothing to say to him after you reprogrammed me into thinking I was still in love with him and got me to go as far as to kill Sauli Koskinen just so I could have Adam when if I hadn't been brainwashed I would never even want to touch him again? I admit it, Adam is the very sexiest man I've ever met, the only one that made me doubt and denounce my heterosexuality, but I don't want him. I've got a boyfriend, and he's far tamer than Adam, less dangerous in bed. Adam is a monster. You have no clue what he's capable of doing when he's hurt!"
Crying, Natalie said, "Now I know. I messed with the wrong motherfucker." Her voice was breaking.
"What's the matter, Nat? I thought we could have Rafe."
"You could have him, even the real Adam and Sauli can, but that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt like hell!"
Walking into the room, the real Adam Lambert said, "Now you know how I felt when you went out of your way to destroy my relationship."
When she attacked him, he just pulled back and she tripped into her own shoe with a broken heel.
He was kind enough to offer her his hand to help her up.
She got up and sat on her bed, crying. "You're the devil incarnate, Adam Lambert! They're right! All that someone has to do to turn you into a monster is to hurt you or try to take from you something you love!"
"Answer my question. I have a TV-performance to get to on Fuse and I don't have time for this drama."
"You want to know how I feel? You're a son of a bitch!"
"My mother doesn't have anything to do with this, but thank you. I hope from now on you think twice before touching me."
"I'd never—"
"You know what I mean! I'd make love to a woman any day if Sauli's no longer in the picture, but that would surely never be you. Never, no way. You're a praying mantis. Rafe is trying to escape from you. Don't you see that? He'd leave with anyone if he saw his way out the door from you!"
"Praying mantis, huh?"
"That's right, or do you prefer to be compared to a python?"
"You're all of those things."
"I could be anyone, as you just found out. Who did you think I was, this sweet songbird you could stomp all over and get away with it?" Adam shook his head. "I don't think so. You hurt someone I love, or try to take something I love, I come at you with everything I have, I don't care who you are, and when I take you down, you stay down. I used my ex lover to destroy your marriage. You tried to get Sauli killed. You ought to know what comes next if you dare to cross me again."
The men left the house. In a twist of fate, Natalie lit her own body on fire, destroying herself and her home. The praying mantis' remains were recovered, but she was unrecognizable.
Meanwhile…
Marc decided not to get plastic surgery after all, ever. Looking just like Adam Lambert now had its perks. He wouldn't get attacked because he would go everywhere with his best friend, Will Remington, and Will was over six feet tall and weighed in at over 300 pounds, making it seem like he was not his friend, but his freaking bodyguard.
When Marc and Adam met once again at the airport, Sauli and Adam were sharing a passionate, long kiss. This time, not taking chances, they were leaving to another one of Adam's gigs, together.
Marc and his girlfriend, Diana approached them. "Hey, guys."
They shared a group hug.
"Not shy on PDA anymore, are we, Lambert?" Marc said.
Adam laughed. "Nope, there's no reason to be. You shouldn't shy away from it either. Go ahead and tell your girl how much you love her, Marc. I almost lost Sauli, and since then, we're together almost twenty-four-seven."
"I'm so happy for you guys, but I've got something to say to Diana." Pulling a little box out of the inside pocket of his jacket, Marc got on his knees and said, "Diana, I love you."
Diana started to cry.
"We've been together for over four years and we have a baby together. Will you marry me?"
She made him get up and gave him a hug.
THE END