Hello everyone. Here's the first ever parody of the Iron Man movie, Hope you all enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it

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In the desolate mountains of Afghanistan two army cars drove through the rocky sand at high speeds. Both cars were reinforced as what was expected when you were at war

The second car behind had four people in it. Three of these were soldiers dressed in standard army clothes and all except the driver held guns

The fourth however was completely different. He was a teenage boy with pale skin and red hair. He wore a thousand dollar suit and held in his left hand a small glass cup with a small drop of whisky

The two soldiers not driving kept on looking at the boy uneasily, as if he was someone very well known

The boy took a sip of his whisky and sighed 'What the hells wrong with all of you? I feel as if I'm about to be court marshalled. Is it a crime to talk to me?' The red haired boy asked the soldier sitting next to him

'No Mr Jack Spicer sir. It's just not every day you get to sit in the same car as a billionaire genius like you' the black haired soldier with a red and white cap explained

Jack Spicer smiled 'you should meet my chauffeur. He drives me everywhere back at home, and trust me, the honour of driving me went away from him long ago. By the way you all protecting me but I don't know you're names. Who're you' Jack asked the cap boy

'Err…I'm Ash Ketchum sir. It's a great honour to meet you' Ash saluted

'Please, never salute. I had a general for an uncle. Sleeping over there has left pretty bad memories. And yours?' Jack asked the soldier in front of him. He was fat and round and had weird swirls on his face

'I'm Chouji sir. I come from a long line of famous cooks. The Akimichi's' Chouji greeted

'Akimichi? Isn't that the family who got arrested for food poisoning food critics?'

'That's not true! Just because they made fun of our most famous stew which my mother put blood sweat and tears into isn't a good enough reason to kill them!' Chouji pleaded

'..Right…Anyway driver what's you're name?' Jack asked the driver who's hair and most of her face was hidden by her helmet

'I'm Meg Griffin' Meg said not turning around

Jack looked at her shocked 'Holy crap I had no idea you were a girl. You know now looking at you I kinda can't stop. I daresay I'm kinda attracted'

Meg instantly turned around and took off her helmet showing her face 'REALLY!!?'

'GAH! Forget I said anything ugly' Jack grimaced. Meg sobbed and then turned back to the wheel

'I guess what they say about you in the media is true. You do flirt with every girl you meet' Chouji laughed

'Yea but I have limits' Jack whispered. He notices Ash was looking at him 'yes?' Jack asked

'Well er….can I take a picture of us two to take back home please?' Ash asked holding up a camera

'Yes you may. Just don't post this on MySpace' Jack agreed. Ash gave Chouji the camera and Ash leaned towards Jack and they both smiled. Ash raised his hand and extended his first two finger to make the peace sign

'That's right do the peace sign. After all I love peace. I'd be out of a job if the world achieved peace' Jack said sarcastically

Chouji lifted the camera and pointed it at them 'O.k. on three, two, one…'

BANG

The car in front of them suddenly exploded and broke into pieces. Meg quickly stopped the car to avoid damage

However within seconds the car was suddenly opened fire upon by multiple unknown enemies who attacked from all directions

'WHAT'S GOING ON!!' Jack shouted scared

'We're under attack. Protect Jack Spicer!' Meg shouted as she jumped out of the car gun at hand. She was however quickly taken out by a hidden enemy who shot her five times in the chest

'Damn…and I never met my true love..' Meg gasped as she fell and died

'No Meg!! Those bastards, I'll kill them all' Chouji proclaimed, however he didn't leave his seat and seemed to be struggling

'What's wrong? Go fight them!' Jack ordered

'I'm kinda stuck. I guess I had too much of mums great cooking' Chouji said embarrassingly. He was quickly however taken out by a shot to the head

'Son of a bitch!!' Ash cried getting out of the car

'Give me a gun asshole!!' Jack pleaded

'Stay there!' Ash ordered. He ran forward gun blazing but all Jack could see was huge explosions going off near Ash. Jack did not see him after…

A shock went all over Jack. He was all alone now. Jack decided he would take his chances and he got out of the car. He crawled behind the car and ran as fast as he could away. Instantly bullet shots and explosions were hit close to him

'Not good, not good, not good, not good!!' Jack panted running. He dived to a nearby boulder and hid there. He breathed in deeply to calm down until….

To his right something hard hit the ground. He looked and saw a small yet deadly missile lodged into the ground. The missile had the words 'Spicer Enterprise' on it

'Oh…the irony..' Jack whined

BANG

Jack was sent flying back into the air. He hit the ground hard and lyed there in pain. He felt his chest, something didn't feel right, and saw that his shirt was blood red and was staining more every second. He was injured from the explosion, and Jack pretty much expected to die….

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When Jack woke up to find he wasn't dead he saw that his vision was clouded, because a brown clothe was covering his eyes

He could barely see anything, but he knew he was sitting on a chair and their were people with guns around him, he could also feel his wound had been bandaged. Suddenly one man grabbed the cloth and yanked it off. Jack would wished he hadn't

Men wearing all red Spartan armour and holding rifles surrounded him. They had a camera pointing straight at Jack while one red soldier shouted out

'You see this blues. We just got your biggest weapons maker. You'll see what it feels like to have your own weapons turned against ya dirtbags' the man said with a very Texan and very military voice

Jack knew exactly what was happening

He was a hostage…