Lily's journal- IT IS NOT A JOURNAL!
And James Potter better STAY OUT!
First Entry on Sept. 13
OOOOOKKKKAAAAAYYYYYY- So this is DEFINITELY NOT a journal. Nope. I mean HOW crazy would that be? I mean with James-freaking-Potter behind me-literally- it would be in EXTREME danger. If he comes over here, I will STAB HIM with this quill. Actually, I kinda hope he does come over… Anyways, this not-journal is going to be my stress reliever. Stress caused by-Alice, stop! Alice! Miranda, help me! Hello, this is Alice speaking, the admirer of Frank Longbottom, and AMAZING friend of the one and only Lily Evans! Anyways, Lily's sentence goes like this. Stress caused by the second most wonderful, perfect, guy ever- Frank is the first- JAMES POTTER! Crap, Miranda, HOLD HER! Ow- Lily- OW!
Sorry, Alice-the backstabbing traitor- stole my quill. And Jam-Potter-is the most despicable person ever! Aww, come on Lily, he's Perfect for you! Go away backstabbing, not-journal stealing, James Potter befriending TRAITOR! Also, Miranda, I thought you were with me! I am, she just said that she would give me a honeydukes chocolate bar if I did it. And James Potter is TERRIBLE. Remus is nicer than him! Well, of course you would say that,You fancy him. But thanks for agreeing with me! You're welcome. And I do not fancy Remus, we're just friends. Whatever you say. So yeah. What I was TRYING to say, before I was very rudely interrupted, was that I have stress caused by James Potter. He is SO despicable, and rude, and an arrogant toerag! What does that even mean? Er, well, I don't actually know, I just heard someone say it once. Who said it? Cause I want to punch their lights out. Er… I mean thank them for making me endure you call Jam-POTTER! Fine, Potter that for FIVE YEARS! Be a little nicer to the poor fellow, they had to endure it too. True… Hey, guys, can I have my not-journal back? After all, I did buy it. So continuing, AGAIN, I hate Potter. He sucks. And he makes me wanna just… just… Snog him? EWWWW! NO! My poor lips would be tortured. I was think more kill him, then bring him back to life, then torture him and kill him again. Oh, sweet, I think I scared Alice off! Anyways, today he asked me out. I don't even know why. I told him, "No way, EVER in this life or the next, would I go out with a bullying toerag like you!" So there's today's stress. Added onto by Alice, of course! Yes, Alice, you added some stress to my huge stress load. I'm gonna end here, because Potters looking rather curious…
Second Entry on Sept. 18
So, guess what? Potter asked me out, AGAIN! ARRRGGGHHH! Aww, c'mon, it was kinda sweet. I wish Frank would do that. It was not sweet, it was nauseating. Miranda, you agree with me, right? Yeah. Sorry, I was busy gagging. I think some got caught in my throat. Honestly, putting COTTON CANDY all over the stairs, and then asking me out at the bottom? Who does that? James, apparently. But hey, at least no one is allergic to Cotton Candy, right? Yeah… and it tastes pretty darn good. Why does everyone look at me weird when I try to eat it, but when YOU eat it, it's fine? Honestly. Well, I think it's because these people think that when a guy gives you large amounts of anything, it's all yours. Thats stupid. I just want some Cotton Candy. Honestly. Um, Lily, we have a slight emergency. I think that first year is allergic to the Cotton Candy… OH CRAP! Here comes prefect mode Lily, TO THE RESCUE! Wow, what is she doing? NO! Not the Cotton Candy! Why? I think she banished it to our room, and then unclogged the firsties throat. Oh, SWEET! Cotton Candy, here I come! WAIT FOR ME! Well, that's done. And, my friends have abandoned me in search of the cotton candy in our dorm, so, I'm gonna rant a bit, okay? So, the Professors are PILING on the homework, and I can barely keep up. And it's gotten a LOT harder since last year. But I can usually finish it before nine-thirty, so I guess that's good. Sev seems really stressed, and doesn't hang out with me much anymore. His friends are, to say the least, creepy Muggleborn haters, who despise me cause I'm top of the class. I'm a prefect, and have to do my prefect duties, which include patrolling until ten. Then you add Potters CONSTANTLY asking me out, and I have an overload of stress. It rocks. So if you could refrain from almost KILLING first years, it would be appreciated. (Sorry, I was talking to Potter.) I'm gonna sign off, I want some cotton candy. I hope Miranda and Alice left some for me.
Third Entry on Sept. 19
THE COTTON CANDY WAS DRUGGED WITH A SLEEPING POTION! ARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH! I am NO LONGER on Potters side. I had an important meeting this morning, and he made me sleep in, SO I MISSED IT! I HATE HIM! I was going to finish this stupid transfiguration essay, IF HE HADN'T DRUGGED THE COTTON CANDY! So, yeah. We are all VERY ANGRY at Potter. If he knows what's good for him, he'd better hide. I change what I said before. I hope Frank NEVER does this. EVER. So, I will tell you what happens later… He's SO dead. Lemme grab my wand and think of all the jinxes I can…
Sept. 19 (Continued)
Oh, yes, revenge is sweet. Potter and Black now resemble slugs. And they look much better this way. Alice is apologizing to Frank because Potter made her miss her meeting with him. I really hate him. Professor McGonagall is amazing, she understood our plight and so now we don't have to do detention with Filch. Remus is talking to Miranda, who is bright red. I KNEW she liked him! He's complimenting her on her amazing spellwork. She rocks. My homework load increased, but today Professor Flitwick let us finish some homework. And I finished my essay! Oh, did you and Remus stop talking? Obviously. But he says I'm amazing at jelly-legs jinxes. Is he going to undo them? Nah. He says they deserve it. I like Remus. He's always willing to help us out. Yeah. He's nice. And funny. Whatever. But Sev seemed more open today, so that's good. And I jinxed Potter, so he didn't get to ask me out! Joy. So, a much better day. I just hope that Alice and Frank are okay…
Fourth Entry on Sept. 21
I am really worried about Alice. She seems depressed, and doesn't even try to steal my quill anymore! Yeah, and she doesn't stare at Frank anymore. It's depressing. I never outright STARED at him, more like stole romantic glances. ALICE! You stole my quill, and wrote in this! I'm so happy for you! Wow. Never thought you'd be HAPPY to have me steal your favorite quill… maybe I'll just keep it… OKAY, I am VERY glad to have you back, but not THAT much. You will NEVER have this quill! HAHAHAHAHAHA! Wow, she just got really weird. Like, Weirder than normal Lily weird. Yeah. Maybe it's the cotton candy drug. But that was AGES ago. It was two days ago. And before you start asking questions, we should help Lily. Do we HAVE to? It looks like she's having fun. Yeah, but she also is being stared at by Potter. Oh, CRAP! We have to save her! Okay… plan. Um… punch Potter's lights out? Kill him? Let's do that! And how about we enlist Remus? I doubt he'll agree, but okay! What do you guys need me for? We need to kill Potter to rescue Lily!Um, okay I guess. You'll do it? Yup. SWEET! We're off to save Lily from the evil dragon Potter! Huzzah! Wow, can't believe I'm actually doing this…