Am I someone you know? Do I have a striking resemblance to your best friend...neighbor...archenemy...section leader? Am I who you think I am, or are you who I hope you aren't?
They don't understand my mind. It's painfully clear to me in every interaction with them. My speech patterns confuse, my mannerisms draw strange looks, hell, even the way I choose to move leaves looks and actions from others that show our separation.
I've never fit in. I remember in first grade, I was the one who brought their baby blanket to school for show and tell. I couldn't read very well, although I knew my ABC's forwards, backwards, and by intervals of thirds, fifths, and minor sevenths.
It started to change, though, once my teacher spent time with me, showing me how to sound out the letters within the words.
Feeling inadequate, although I at that time knew not what it was, I struggled to read everything I could lay my hands on, soon passing the level of my peers. But I didn't care.
I had discovered my inclination towards defensive reading - after all, my father had divorced my mom when I was six/seven (?). I was being raised by my grandparents, although I was in legal custody of my mother. She was away at college, getting a degree in nursing, while I was raised by the television and my manipulative grandma.
We lived out in the country, so I had no friends nearby to play with. Well, I take that back, there were two kids, but the youngest was eight years my senior. Another instance of my being separated.
By the time I was in fourth grade, I was at an eighth grade reading level. But my skills in spelling, math, and grammar were horrible! I confounded my teachers, mother and grandparents. But I didn't care. I only liked to escape into the stories of Reading and History.
In fourth grade, I also learnt that I was not an athlete in any way, shape, or form. I also learnt that I couldn't cartwheel, quarter-squat, or wrestle. I did care that time. Because wrestling was a Challenge, one I had to beat to be equal with, no, better than, my peers. But I wasn't made for any form of sport, no matter what my mother said when she enrolled me in softball from first to seventh grade.