Clarice sighed and rubbed her head, just knowing she was getting a headache. "Why are we working with Edward again?"
"Clarice," Jonathan said her name in warning.
"I mean, was last time not enough?"
"Clarice, he's-"
"Smart, yeah, I get that. Everybody knows that. Seriously, though. Are you a glutton for punishment? Last time I almost died."
"You won't be working alone this time."
"I am not going to be a bodyguard for the both of- wait, what?"
"You're not working alone. He has-"
"You're not talking about those idiots Mannie and Zowie, are you? They're the ones that almost killed me. Do you know how embarrassing it is that Batman had to save me?"
"You're alive."
"That's because Batman managed to pull me out of the blast zone! I mean, seriously, do they have something against me or are they literally stupid enough to forget that I exist?"
"Knowing them?"
"Shut up, Jonathan, let me rant."
"You're lucky we're f-fri-ends," He stumbled over the f-word, still uncomfortable with acknowledging her as such. "If we weren't, I'd have to kill you for that."
"Knowing you, you'd still kill me."
"Really?"
"You've sprayed me with fear gas and left me to my nightmares. Or shall we forget that night when you created 'The Valley of Fear'?" Clarice rolled her eyes at the title he'd dubbed his favorite formula.
"That is still my best formula."
"And I was your lab rat, you ass."
"You have to admit, it was quite an advancement."
"And you have to admit that you're an asshole."
"Clarice, if you don't shut up, we may just have a repeat performance of what happens when you are dosed with my toxin."
"I hate you sometimes."
Honestly, the first time Switch saw the Reaper and Scarecrow, she swore they were together. Well, really, they bickered like an old married couple.
"Jonathan, where's my mask?"
"What do you mean, where's your mask, don't you have it?"
"I have my gas mask, but I told you to grab the one that goes over it. You know, the one that makes me look like the Reaper and not just some woman in a gas mask."
"I can assure you, Clarice, that you never told me to grab your mask."
"Jonathan, we were in your lab, we were packing up, my mask was next to yours and I asked you to grab it."
"I have my mask. I told you to grab your own damn mask."
"Holy shit," Switch muttered under her breath.
They went on for about fifteen minutes, arguing about whether or not she'd told him to grab her bloody mask.
And that was when Reaper turned to her.
"You! You and Edward were there with us, did I or did I not tell him to grab my mask?"
Judging by the glare on Scarecrow's face, Switch knew that if she agreed with Reaper she'd be gassed by the man.
Even though Reaper had told him to grab her mask.
Switch did the only thing she could do.
She shrugged.
"I dunno."
"What do you mean you don't-" Reaper cut herself off and threw her hands in the air, as if surrendering. "I give up. I give up. Fine, I didn't tell you, whatever, you still should've grabbed it, it was right there."
Riddler gave Scarecrow a sympathetic look, as if saying: Women. The most insufferable creatures on the planet.
They had relative peace for a few minutes.
"You let your employees speak to you like that, Jonathan?" Riddler asked.
And of course he had to butt his nose into others' business.
"I'm not an employee, Edward," Reaper said.
Switch wondered for a moment why she was allowed to call him Edward, but she had to call him Riddler. At least to his face.
"So he calls you hired help, then?" Riddler asked. Reaper rolled her eyes, gave a suffering sigh and turned her head to Scarecrow and gestured to Riddler.
Scarecrow rubbed his hand over his eyes and turned to Riddler.
"She's not working for me, Edward. She works with me, if only because she's insufferable and demands she's not an employee."
"Of course I'm not an employee, I'm your friend," Reaper snapped, grabbing an extra gas mask. She turned to Switch and wiggled it slightly before tossing it. Switch caught it, if only barely. Reaper had terrible aim. "Gonna need this, kiddo."
"I am not a kid," Switch said indignantly. Reaper just rolled her eyes.
"A friend?" Riddler asked. Scarecrow turned and glared at Reaper.
"Yes," Jonathan said grudgingly.
"Are you two dating?" Switch asked. Reaper stiffened and one of her hands tightened over a canister of fear gas. Scarecrow eyed Reaper warily for a moment before glaring at Switch.
Maybe she should've waited until the crazies with the tendency to gas anything that crossed their path were away from their precious fear gas before she opened her mouth.
"I don't date," Reaper said slowly, a frosty anger coating her words.
Switch watched as Scarecrow hesitantly pat Reaper on the back.
"Still hung up on that security guard, I see. I don't see why. He's dead and buried," Riddler remarked, as if it was just as acceptable to say that to a dead man's loved one as it would be to comment on the weather.
Reaper quickly sucked in a breath before tossing the fear canister at Riddler and pulling her gas mask on.
Switch barely had enough to pull on the one she'd been tossed and Scarecrow glared while pulling his on, grabbing Riddler by the feet, and pulling him into the other room.
Switch flinched at the sound of Riddler's whimpers and screams, but for her own sake, decided not to launch herself at Reaper in an attack.
The two women stood there for a few seconds before Reaper looked at Switch.
"Let's get out of here, kid."
"I'm not a kid!"
"Whatever, Switch."
A/N: So, this is a present for SwordStitcher! I told her I'd stick Switch in a story, and by George, I DID! And it was really fun. So hopefully I got Switch right and hopefully she enjoys it so far. More chapters coming up soon!