I wish that I could go over the Nickelodeon Studios and knock some sense into whoever decided to air iLost My Mind in August with my buttersock! :(
DISCLAIMER: You know the drill.
Chapter 1: Mrs. Benson's POV
My eyes snapped open when I heard my alarm clock blaring. I quickly shut it off and stretched. Ah, it was a beautiful Saturday morning, so that means I don't have to go to work! I can stay home with my Freddie ALL day! Perhaps we can make some almond butter together.
I slipped my feet into to my slippers and put on my robe, making my way to the kitchen. As I poured myself a cup of organic, sugar and glucose free coffee, something felt off. I looked at the clock and saw that it was 6:15 and Freddie STILL wasn't awake! He alarm should've waked him up at 6! He knows that he's not allowed to sleep in; he could throw off his biological clock!
I quickly padded down the hall to Freddie's room and barged in, not even bothering to knock. Freddie's sheets were in a heap on the freshly-cleaned floor, and he was lying on his stomach. What if he stops breathing lying like that? !
"Freddie!" I said forcefully, poking his shoulder. "Honey, wake up!" He stirred a bit, then lifted his head.
"Whaaaa….?"
"Sweatheart, it's 6:17 and you're still in bed! You were supposed to be up 17 minutes ago! You never have a problem waking up this early! You're not sick, are you?" I said worriedly, shoving my head on his forehead.
He pushed me away. "Mom, I'm FINE! I'm just tired!"
"But you went to bed at 8:00 like every other night! You didn't stay up later than that, did you?" I gasped.
He looked away and fiddled with his hands a bit. "No… I, uh, just had trouble sleeping. That's all. I'm gonna go take a shower now…" He quickly ran off to his bathroom.
"DON'T FORGET TO USE THE ANTI-BACTERIAL SOAP!" I remind him through the door.
I walked back into the kitchen to start making a healthy breakfast, and fifteen minutes later Freddie came in, his hair still dripping wet.
"Freddie!" I gasped. "Go dry your hair right now, young man! You might catch a cold!" He groaned and stomped away. Why is he so moody today! ?
By the time he came back, I had finished making his mushroom omelet (with organic eggs and mushrooms, of course).
Freddie sat down and poked his food around the plate. "Freddie, it's not nice to play with food!" I scolded. "Eat like a big boy!"
He looked away. "I'm not really hungry…" He took a bite of the omelet then got up. "I'm going over to Carly's!" He called.
"FREDWARD BENSON!" I screamed. "WAIT! You have to eat!" But he was already gone.
I sighed and sat down to finish his omelet. I can't let this good food go to waste!
Around 11 Freddie STILL wasn't back, so I started to get worried. He hasn't even called! I blew the whistle, and even then he didn't come!
Scared, I ran out into the hallway to go to the Shay's, but I bumped into Freddie. "FREDDIE!" I screamed, hugging him tight. "WHAT HAPPENED? Are you hurt?"
"Mom! I'm fine!" He sighed, walking past me into the apartment.
"Why were you over there so long?" I demanded.
He shrugged and looked away. "You know… just… coming up for with ideas for a new iCarly."
I snorted. "Well then. Do you want to make a puzzle with me?"
He spun on his heel and walked down to hall. "I'm gonna go do my homework."
Why is my baby acting so strange? ! He LOVES puzzles!
I quickly made my way to my room and shut the door. I walked over to my computer and opened the security camera file, clicking on the link that said "Freddie's Room". What? It's not wrong of me to see what he's doing!
The screen loaded and an image of Freddie's room popped up. He was lying on his stomach in his bed, smiling like an idiot. He said he was doing his homework!
Something must be wrong… very wrong. I closed the security camera screen and opened up IceFox. I logged on to SpashFace Answers (my account is CleanMama123) and asked a new question: "My son is acting very strange. He is not sleeping well, not wanting to eat, being moody, and acting secretive. What wrong with him? PLEASE ANSWER! TEN POINTS FOR THE BEST ANSWER!" (Yes, SplashFace Answers is a parody of Yahoo Answers. And people always yell "TEN POINTS FOR THE BEST ANSWER!" So I made Mrs. Benson do it. Yeah.)
I sat there for ten minutes, refreshing the page every five seconds. Finally, an answer popped up from the user name 'BunniesAreMyLife'. "Wow. You have a REAL teenager on your hands. He probably hates you. Congrats! :P" My mouth opened in shock. How DARE this person who I don't even know insult my parenting skills? I reported their answer and marked it as spam, then refreshed the page again.
After another couple of minutes, another answer came up from the username 'DrOfColors'. "My teenage son went through the same thing last year. This might be hard for you to hear, but it sounds like he's in love. There's no need to worry, though. These symptoms he has should go away after the shock of his love goes away. Have a SPECTACULAR day!"
In LOVE? My Freddie? There's no way… ever since that rotten Carly girl broke his heart, I knew that he would never like a girl again!
But wait… what if he loves her again! ? I started to breathe heavily. It's not possible… but who else could he be in love with?
I got up and paced around my room. He doesn't hang out with any other girls that he would like, so Carly MUST be the one! Ugh, I hate that girl… and I bet that's why Freddie is spending so much time over at her apartment now!
All of a sudden there was a knock at the door, and Freddie poked his head in. "Mom? I'm going out, I'll be home around 9." He started to leave, but I ran after him.
"Just wait a second, young man! Where do you think you're going?" I noticed what he was wearing, and I think I have a good idea… he's dressed in a light purple button up with a TIE! He's probably going on a date with Carly, why else would he dress like that? "And WHY are you all dressed up in your church clothes?"
He looked nervous. "We have to pretend that we're at church for a new segment on iCarly… I have to go, I'm gonna be late!" With that he ran out of the apartment.
I can't believe this… he won't even tell me the truth! And I know he's not filming iCarly, they do that on Thursday nights! But I can't accuse him of dating that witch until I have some real proof… maybe Spencer knows something about them.
I hurried across the hall and slowly opened the Shay's door (they never kept it locked, what a safety hazard!) in case Freddie or Carly was there. However, all I saw was that chubby boy who came over to our house a couple of times.
When I walked in, I noticed that he was shirtless. "Hey, 'sup?" He greeted.
"Um, hello." I said, disgusted. "Why don't you have a shirt on? You could gather germs on your chest!"
"Don't tell me how to live!"
I sighed. "Whatever. Is Spencer here?"
"Nope. I'm the only one here." Hm. So that means that Carly and Freddie aren't here either…
"Do you know where everybody is?" I asked.
"I know that Spencer's at some art show, but Carly, Sam and Freddie were already gone when I got here."
"Oh, darn it!" I cried.
The chubby boy sat up. "What's the matter?"
"Well, I'm worried about Freddie. He's been acting… different. Have you noticed anything different about him?" I asked hopefully.
"No, I was sick all last week, so I haven't been around much."
"Well, it's no surprise you got sick since you don't wear a shirt!" I yelled. "But I don't know what to do about Freddie. I think that he might be dating that nasty Carly girl, but I don't wanna act like I'm spying on him…"
"Hey! What if I spied on him for you?" He offered. "And I'll take pics of my evidence with my new PearPad!"
"Hm. That's not a bad idea! Would you mind doing that for me?" I asked excitedly.
The boy nodded. "Totally! I even have a new spy outfit I've been wanting to try out!" He handed me a card. "Here's my number. Give me yours so that I can call you and schedule a meeting to discuss the evidence."
I gave him my number and we exchanged good-byes. "By the way, the name's Gibby. Gibby Gibson." He told me.
The next two hours I spent pacing around the house, endlessly cleaning to get my mind off things. It didn't work. I even scanned Freddie's room, trying to find any evidence of him dating, but there was nothing.
Finally at 8:00, I got a call from Gibby. "Hello?" I said frantically. "Did you find anything?"
"Yup. I have some very… interesting information. Come to the lobby elevator and I'll explain everything."
I quickly ran down to the lobby's elevator, where I found Gibby in a complete spy-like camouflage outfit. He locked the elevator door so nobody could get it.
"Well, what did you find?" I asked nervously.
He sighed. "Alright, I'm not sure how you're going to take this, but…"
"JUST TELL ME!" I screamed.
"Okay, okay!" He took out his PearPad and unlocked it. "Your son, Freddie…" I put my hand over my mouth. "Is DATING Sam."
WHAT! ? "!" I screamed.
How could this be happening? That girl does nothing but abuse my Freddie! I started to tear up.
"Aw, Mrs. Benson, don't cry!" Gibby soothed.
"DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!" I screamed. I grabbed the PearPad and looked at the picture more closely. In it, Freddie and Sam were sitting in a purple restaurant booth, smiling at each other. I went to the next picture, and my eyes nearly popped out of my head. FREDDIE WAS KISSING HER HAND! (That wasn't shown in the promo, I just made it up!)
"What restaurant are they at?" I demanded.
Gibby looked afraid. "The Lilac Lily. It's on Elm Street."
I unlocked the elevator and stormed out of Bushwell.
It was 8:30 by the time I reached the restaurant. I ran in and was stopped by a waitor. "Can I help you?"
"NO!" I shrieked, pushing him out of the way. Where's my baby? !
I quickly scanned the restaurant until my eyes landed on Freddie and that terrible blonde girl, Sam.
"FREDWARD BENSON!" I screamed. The whole restaurant hushed down.
Freddie looked up, and when his eyes locked on mine, he cringed. I stomped over to their table.
"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?" I questioned, even though I already knew what he was doing.
He looked terrified. "Uh mom, don't freak out…"
Sam stood up. "Look, lady, we're in the middle of a date if you don't mind!" She said rudely.
I gasped. "Don't you dare speak to me like that, you… you…"
"MOM!" Freddie yelled. "Stop it! I'm sorry I didn't tell you about this, but-"
"You're sorry? ! I don't care if you're sorry, I can't have you dating this delinquent! She might pressure you into drugs!" Someone in the restaurant gasped.
All of a sudden, Carly came up. "Mrs. Benson! I'm sorry to interrupt, but you crossed the line! I've been best friends with Sam for years; you don't know anything about her! How could you just assume something like that?"
My eyes narrowed. "What are you doing here, dummy? And I think that I CAN assume things like that, considering she's been abusing my son for years! I don't want him dating a girl who constantly beats him up!" I locked eyes with her. "Or makes him get hit with Mexican food trucks!"
Freddie slammed his fist down on the table. "MOM! Stop it! Sam doesn't really beat me up… it's more like a punch every once in a while. That's just the way we are, we're gonna fight! It's our thing! And Carly came to make sure that we don't fight on our first date, and you know what? We were really enjoying ourselves and not fighting until you showed up! I love Sam, can't you just accept that?"
Sam spoke up. "Look, Mrs. Benson, I know that I'm not pefect, and that I'm mean and aggressive… but that doesn't mean that I don't have feelings! I'm sorry if I don't measure up to who you want Freddie to date, but you're gonna have to get used to it. I'll be around for a longgggg time!"
"Awww!" Carly cooed. "She's gonna be around for a long time!"
I sighed. "Fine. But whenever you come over to our house, you're not allowed to go be together in Freddie's room alone. And you must TRY to be more lady-like and mature, at least around me." I stated firmly.
Freddie groaned. "Moooom!"
Sam took a forkful of spaghetti from her plate and shoved it in her mouth. "How's that for lady-like?"
She needs a lot of work… but she seems to make my baby happy, so I guess I'll have to get used to this. But I'm definitely installing more security cameras so I can spy on them some more.
A/N: Mrs. Benson is one crazy nut! I hope you enjoyed her crazy-ness!
I tried to stuff this all into a one-shot, so hopefully it doesn't seem too rushed or anything. And Im sorry for not updating my other stories, I've been studying for finals for the past two weeks, and they're finally done! :D
Reviews are loved!