Okay I'm probably one of the few people who hadn't seen Jurassic Park until this year- though I knew the Weird Al song for like ever. I know, I know; one of the best known, most watched movies of all time and I finally see it 20 years later. I always put it off for other things but I finally sat down and watched it and yeah I really, really like it.

So much so that I got another weird mash-up idea. Hey, I like ripping off movies and fitting them to canon and the more challenging the movie seems the more fun I can have.

Surprisingly, I've come up with something very coherent that fits with canon. So like my last story, it keeps the basic gist of the movie and keeps key moments while fitting with Community canon.

Plot and character crap at the end of this chapter. Until then, please enjoy an original expositional prologue.

"Did I ever tell you," Pierce's abrupt talking interrupted the quietness of actual studying, "about the time I had sex with Eartha Kitt-"

"Yes," six annoyed voices reminded him in unified ire.

"Well! Keep up that negative attitude and I won't invite you all to my private island."

This got everyone's attention; particularly Jeff's who arched an eyebrow in disbelief. "You have your own private island?"

"Yes, and I'm really rather bored with it. I mean it just sits there somewhere in one of those destitute continents like Europe or Canada but everyone speaks Mexican there."

"So it's in South America?" Annie asked for mainly clarification purposes.

"And you'd figure they'd speak American in South America. Anywho, I've decided that my private island was boring and I've decided to build a theme park."

Troy's eyes went wide with excitement. "Like DisneyWorld?"

"I suppose, but I'm going to center it on dinosaurs."

Jeff chuckled. "Well that's something you should have plenty of experience with."

"I had a feeling you would make a joke about my age but I'm just going to ignore that and let you get back to your gay thoughts."

"And I'll just ignore your pathetic attempts at a comeback."

Pierce scoffed at him and continued talking. "So this dinosaur theme park idea has been under construction for a couple of years and I plan to open it to the public."

Shirley smiled. "I'm sure my boys would love a dinosaur themed amusement park."

"I'd love a dinosaur themed amusement park," Troy interjected.

"By public I mean people over the age of eighteen," Pierce's explanation earned a frown from Shirley and a celebratory 'Yes!' from Troy. "It's not that it's an adult park it's just I really hate children. There are so many legal hoops to jump through for children so why bother."

"But kids love dinosaurs," Britta pointed out.

"I love dinosaurs," Troy reminded.

Pierce shrugged. "Well, I don't like kids. And I didn't say it was an amusement park, it's a theme park where the theme is dinosaurs. There won't be any rides, just dinosaurs."

"We can't ride the dinosaurs?"

"I can't open this park without consents and endorsements from a lawyer, a naturalized U.S. citizen over the age of twenty-one, and an academic advisor."

Annie looked at him confused. "Why do you need an academic advisor?"

"Gilbert suggested the park would be a sure-fire guarantee if we claim there's academic merit in it. I mean, you're learning about dinosaurs and crap. We just need an academic advisor to come along with us of course."

"Am I to assume that I'm the lawyer?" Jeff inquired.

"Oh no, I hired a legitimate, not gay lawyer. I suppose I can ask the dean to accompany us, Troy and Annie would be the appropriate age for the target age group, there would be diversity, Britta enjoys free stuff…"

"Yeah and," half of the group groaned in advance when Britta started speaking, "having someone who's an avid animal lover would be beneficial because if said animal lover- i.e. me- were to see some sort of mistreatment said animal lover might call PETA or the ASPCA; both numbers she keeps on speed dial."

No one said anything for a moment until Pierce broke the awkward silence by continuing on with his prior speech. "…Britta enjoys free stuff, and this is like a mini vacation on a private island somewhere off the coast of some Spanish speaking place whose name I most likely will pronounce wrong."

"What are you gonna call your park?" Troy at with the utmost curiosity.

"I'm going to call it…Jurassic Park."

Jeff put his hands to his large forehead in exasperation. "Spielberg is going to sue your plagiarizing ass for millions."

"That loser? Steven owes me one so we'll call this theme park thing even."

"I don't think this is such a good idea," Abed finally spoke. "If you're going to have the park exactly like the movie then-"

"That's where you're wrong A-bed," Pierce mispronounced Abed's name (as usual). "See, that was just a movie. The only similarities this has to that piece of crap film is the dinosaurs and the name. It's not like anyone's going to get killed."

"I'm still really unsure about this. Personally, if you're going to build a theme park from a movie I'd suggest WallyWorld from National Lampoon's Vacation or a movie park that wouldn't kill its customers."

Pierce laughed. "That was the best movie ever." He cleared his throat. "But that park would be too obvious and children would want to go because it's the perfect rip-off name for DisneyWorld. Besides, it's a jungle island so it can't really have an urban park. That's the word I'm looking for right, urban? It's not too racist?"

"Still, it doesn't really feel right."

"Then don't come."

"No, I want to come. I like dinosaurs."

"Who doesn't?"

"So we're going to a dinosaur park created by a dinosaur?" Jeff sighed in exasperated defeat as Pierce glowered at the joke. "I just know this is going to be a guaranteed failure."

Yeah I kinda sort skipped the first fifteen minutes or so of the movie. I needed to create a legit Community-like reason why there is Jurassic Park, why they're going, and why it's cool to use the name and rip-off the Spielberg flick.

While all our Community folks are staying in character, I did give most of them bases from people in the movie.

Jeff is Alan Grant; the lead guy who's a cynic at times and gets stuck with the kids.

Britta is Ellie Satler. Ellie was a blonde paleobotanist, Britta is a blonde vegetarian. That's really all I had to go on.

Pierce gets a more prominent role as the John Hammond base; the old, rich guy who's responsible for the park and getting the people together.

I guess Abed is based on Ian Malcolm but honestly, I don't see any similarities except for the fact that they're both smart. I just needed to fit the Malcolm part.

Troy and Annie are like Tim and Lex respectively. But yeah, there are going to be some obvious changes besides age difference so I could keep with canon.

I found a way to make Chang like Dennis Nedry. Nedry's kind of the human villain, and Chang is usually the villain so…it made sense.

I brought in some recurring and one-time characters too. Alan Connor I brought in as the lawyer Pierce hired (throwback to the season 3 finale) obviously based on the lawyer Donald Gennaro. The Black Rider from Fistful of Paintballs is Robert Muldoon, the game hunter. Honestly, I didn't think Shirley or Pelton would be suited for the role so I tried to think of a one-time character and he stuck out because we saw him with (paintball) guns. I'm bringing Star-Burns back from the dead to fill the Samuel L. Jackson part. Dean Spreck from City College will also play a small, but important part.

I created a reason for Dean Pelton to be there and I'm bringing Shirley in because you can't leave her out. From what I've outlined, she'll be probably be hanging with Pierce's character mostly.

So, if you have any feedback, remarks, 'I caught that reference' observation, or want to comment on how insane I am feel free to.