THERE SHE IS!
My story begins on a cool day in Autumn.
My name is Nabi. I am a cat, white furred, and I live in a small city in South Korea. I work as a paper boy, nothing special, just enough to pay the bills. I live in an apartment, alone. No pets, no family or friends, only the occasional cockroach. I've never had a girlfriend, boyfriend or a friend. You could say my life is very, very dull.
In said city, we share the houses, streets and shops with rabbits for some reason. I have no idea why, though. Most of us hate them, and vice versa, although we try not to show it. There has been the occasional friendship between species, but nothing more. Until my story starts, that is.
Most stories of the romantic genre begin with something like a breakup between a previous couple, or maybe it starts with the two meeting, he/she helps him/her get their love interest interested in him/her, only to fall for their instructor. My story isn't made up, it's true. So I won't start in some romantic setup. Or at least I don't think it is. I don't read or watch romance on a daily basis. Anyway, if the story was make-believe, it would start with one of the above openings. But it doesn't. No. So I'll tell you where it really started.
My story begins…in a vending machine.
I patiently waited for my "Juicy Fish" vending machine to stop whirring and clicking and just give me my drink. How hard can it be to drop a plastic cup, fill it with water, and then drop sardines in it? I mean, really. I waited a while, standing there, twirling my favourite green scarf. I decided to look around. Anything to combat the boredom. "Let's see…" I thought, "A dead tree above me…a park to my left, and…" it was then that I noticed a small rabbit girl next to me, also with white fur, waiting for her drink of "Carrot Juice".
"Honestly, how can you possibly drink that stuff?" I thought. It's disgusting. I mean carrot juice? Really? Well, I haven't actually tried any before, but it's still gross! At that moment, my vending machine decided to work. With a final whir and click, it dropped the plastic cup, added water, and dropped in the sardines. "Finally!" I mentally shouted. I reached into the little slot to grab my drink, when I heard a clatter next to me. Grabbing my drink anyway, I turned to the direction of the clatter.
Standing there, blushing to the highest degree, was the little rabbit girl, clutching her chest, and staring right at me. She had dropped her cup, still partially filled with that vile concoction, hence the clatter. She stared at me for a good five seconds, and as I was just about to ask her if she was alright, seven little pink shapes appeared floating over her head. With horror, I realised they were love hearts.
Panicking, I dropped my cup, and looked around for help. "I can't be near this girl!" I thought frantically, "She looks crazy!" First, I looked behind me in a half-hearted attempt to see if I wasn't her object of fascination. All I saw was a large group of cats, crushing my hopes. I was about to motion for help, but none of them looked worried. They instead had bewildered faces, mocking faces and disgusted faces. I turned to the crowd behind the little rabbit girl, and looked for help there. Nothing, just more of the same.
I stood there, mouth agape, not believing that no-one would help, as the little rabbit girl spun around on the spot, pulled a carrot out of seemingly nowhere, and shoved the vile vegetable into my open mouth. I waited about half a second before I took off in the opposite direction, the laws of physics not having time to affect the carrot, as it spun in mid air a few times. But, even then, the small rabbit girl was hot on my heels and the little love hearts hot on hers.
As I ran down the street, the little rabbit girl still chasing me, a million thoughts rushed through my head. "Who is she?" "What does she want?" "Why me?" That final question bounced around in my head for ages, and even as we passed a sign declaring rabbit/cat love socially unacceptable, she and her love hearts still persisted, not noticing it at all.
I ran halfway around the city trying to avoid her, but to no avail. Whenever I walked down a street, there she is, jumping out of a manhole. Whenever I turned a corner, there she is, offering me a carrot. When I climbed a wall to get away, there she is, already at the top, the little love hearts still circling her head like pink sharks. And when I slid down, there she is, already at the bottom, waiting for me.
She poured her heart out to me. She dreamed of horse riding with me, dancing in the moonlight with me, running through meadows with me while the sunflowers gazed in awe. As she poured out her heart, the little love hearts that were following her multiplied, and began pinning me to the ground, eventually creating a pile so large I could hardly breathe. One final heart dropped from the sky, and hit me on the head, causing my world to go dark.
I remember running down a street, and turning a corner so sharply I almost fell. I ran through a crowd of people, hoping they would slow the little rabbit girl down. Turns out they slowed me down more than her. As I ran, I turned behind me briefly to see her grab me in a bear hug, as I looked at the massive crowd of people she had mercilessly mowed down to get to me. As the dust cleared, I noticed one cat still conscious, but that ended quickly.
I used my basic karate skills to shrug out of the bear hug, and run into the nearest building. I ran to the elevator, but it was in use, so I took the stairs to the top floor. Panting, I ran as fast as my legs could carry me to the elevator, now open and ready for my escape plan. I ran in, turned quickly and pressed the ground floor button as many times as I could. The doors closed, but as I was about to sigh a breath of relief, I noticed a rabbit shaped shadow on the door, surrounded by love heart shaped shadows. I turned, realising it was too late. The rabbit on the bottom floor must have been shocked to open the elevator and find a wall of love hearts with a cat underneath them.
I simply could not escape. My apartment? There she is, giving me gifts, if carrots can be called gifts. Bathroom stalls? There she is, giving me carrot cake, my pants down. Fast food restaurants? There she is, interrupting my meal of eel and rice to shove more carrots down my throat. I couldn't take it anymore. I was losing my sanity. So I decided I would try the diplomatic approach. Talk to her.
We agreed to meet at her apartment, which is disturbingly close to mine. She was enthralled to know that I wouldn't run away this time. The little love hearts danced merrily above her head. And so, I made my preparations. I gathered three rabbits to wait outside while I spoke to her. So, I knocked, she answered, I entered. Her apartment was rather bare, but that was an observation for later. I had some mental healing to deliver.
Even though it was her apartment, I pulled her chair out for her. She giggled, bowed in gratitude, and sat down. Doki (as I learnt her name to be) was quite a polite girl if you got over the insane chase across the city business. I also realised the love hearts were gone. She noticed me staring at her, and she blushed. And with that, our lesson began. I cleared my throat, and began. Male cat, plus Female cat, equals love. I looked over at Doki, and she tilted her head in confusion. "Alright, step two", I thought. Male rabbit, plus Female rabbit, equals love. Doki once more tilted her head in confusion. "Time for the show-stopper", I thought. Male cat, plus Female rabbit, equals no love. I stared at her, hoping she would understand. I waited about three seconds before she tilted her head a third time in confusion. "Okay, so she doesn't understand," I thought, "I still have Plan B."
Plan B in question was the three rabbits outside. They stood there, in all their apparent glory, as I told Doki to take her pick: Brains, Brawn or Charm. Brains didn't seem to care, as his nose was planted firmly in a book. Brawn was trying to look tough, and was succeeding. Charm was offering Doki a rose. I then watched in horror as Doki walked up to them, fire in her eyes, and beat them all up. She turned to me, the love hearts reappearing. I thought of one final place that I would be safe. And so, I ran as fast as I could to that spot. Doki followed me all the way, as did the love hearts.
I ran faster than I thought possible by anyone toward the park where Doki first met me. I ran towards a tall brown tree, my last symbol of hope. Looking behind me, Doki was not far away. And so, I did what cats are good at. I climbed the tree. Doki stared up at me, the hearts above her head looking to me like piranhas jumping out of a river towards a bird. I pulled out my handkerchief, and wiped the sweat from my brow. Rabbits can't climb trees. It's common knowledge.
I stayed up there, in perpetual heaven, for approximately eight seconds before I heard a thunk, and the tree vibrated. "What was that?" I thought frantically. I looked toward the source, and I lost all hope of freedom. "You…have got to be kidding me…" Those were the last thoughts to travel through my head before the next thunk, and the next, until Doki had cut the tree down. I smacked into the ground, hard. I sat there, not knowing what to do. It took me all of five seconds to decide. I felt ashamed, but it was the only solution. I reached into my pocket, and pulled out a white flag. I surrender. I would go horse riding with her. I would dance with her. I would run through the meadows with her. The last part of that day I remember was Doki and I, sitting on the roof of my apartment, gazing at the sunset, a growing pile of love hearts next to her.
We met again the next day, back at the vending machines. She decided that I should try Carrot Juice, and she should try Juicy Fish. I complied, not wanting another whole week of running away from something inescapable. I took the cup, and watched Doki go to get hers. I stood there, staring into the orange liquid, not sure if I should drink it or not. I then looked up to notice a female cat walking past me, seemingly in a hurry. I was about to ask what was wrong, when a large rabbit ran past after her. He was holding flowers.
I decided that I should be brave, and drink the juice. Raising the cup to my face, I took a light sip…and loved it. It was delicious. Pleasantly surprised, I looked over at Doki, who was downing her Juicy Fish drink like she hadn't had liquid nourishment in days. She looked at me, and I noticed she had a little nose-peg on. I felt something leave me, and I turned to notice a little pink love heart. Panic stricken, I quickly swatted it away.
I hope Doki didn't see.