Disclaimer:
Me: Now usually I would do the disclaimer myself but I'm too lazy, so! I'm gonna have a brawl character do it.
Waluigi: Wah hah hah!
Me: Um… Waluigi your not really a brawl character, and your not even signed up to do it.
Meta Knight: That's right I'm doing it! –smashes a smash ball and covers Waluigi in his cloak- Behold…. –a slash goes across the screen and sends Waluigi flying-
Me: Okay well that's nice but I don't really want to make the disclaimer to long.
Meta Knight: Fine don't write my epicness!
Me: Don't worry you'll get your epicness some day.
Meta Knight: Fine, LZM (Aka Lord Zero Master) Does not I repeat he does not own anything Nintendo related.
Me: Right and enjoy the show!
Super Smash Bros. Mayhem!
Chapter One: Why must video games always act weird?
So it was a normal day for these 4 friends, Ramiro, Carlos, Jonathan, and Danny. They were at Carlos' house playing Super Smash Bros. Brawl, Jonathan kept owning them as three different characters, Jigglypuff, Kirby, and Luigi. While Carlos stuck to Snake, and Fox, Danny was playing as a variety of characters with his latest character being Captain Falcon. Ramiro since he was still beginner was still doing not so good but he did do good with Meta Knight, Ike, and Pit.
The current line up was, Carlos as Fox, Jonathan as Kirby, Danny as Captain Falcon, and Ramiro as Meta Knight. The stage they picked was the Hyrule Temple. But right when they picked it the screen loaded and the lights went out at the house, a strange whirling, some screaming and yelling later, showed that no one was in the room.
-Meanwhile at Hyrule Temple-
"I told you Falco I don't know where Fox is." Said Princess Zelda who was talking to Falco because Falco was trying to find Fox, he seemed to have disappeared while they were sparring, so Falco decided to traverse through the different area's and ended up at Hyrule Temple, that's when he ran into Zelda.
"Are you sure?" The blue feathered bird replied while crossing his arms.
"Yes I'm sure it's not like their going to fall out of the sky any minute now." Zelda replied, and in that next couple of seconds 4 people fell from the sky. They were a pink blob, a tacky dressed guy with a red helmet, a blob wearing armor and a sword, and a Fox wearing futuristic clothes.
"Um Zelda, are you sure your not a witch? Besides I asked for Fox, not Meta Knight, Kirby, and freaking Captain Falcon, he's not even an animal."
"What are you talking about?" Zelda asked completely oblivious to the new people.
"The people who just fell out of the sky behind you, are you even paying attention?" Falco said pointing at the pile of smashers, Zelda turned around and looked at them for awhile before rushing over to them.
"Are you all okay?" She asked concerned.
"Ugh... What happened..." Ramiro said sitting down and then noticing Zelda, and Falco. "Whoa, where the heck am I, and why am I so short? Wait no! I can't be the midget again!"
"Calm down Meta Knight, your not acting like yourself." Falco replied weirded out.
"Meta Knight? My names Ramiro, not fucking Meta Knight, if I was Meta Knight then that would be awesome but I'm not."
"Um... Meta Knight are you okay? You're not Ramiro your Meta Knight." Falco replied getting slightly more weirded out.
"Oh great, I'm having one of those dreams again."
"Dreams, what are you talking about?"
"Oh well I'll just wake up by falling off the edge." Ramiro replied walking over to the edge when he jumped up he accidently went higher because his wings accidently opened up made him glide in the air. "What the heck... Okay well this is interesting... why am I flying around like Meta Knight."
"Cause you are Meta Knight!" Falco replied.
"Whoa cool I'm Meta Knight, oh no... this couldn't be, I was sucked into the video game! Ahh this is my dream all over again! But slightly cooler."
"That seems logical." Zelda replied as Meta Knight landed next to them.
"So exactly why am I here? all I remember is playing a match of brawl with my friends and now I'm here."
"Oh well first so Falco doesn't go crazy while explain it, he should head off." Zelda Replied.
"Um I'm not going anywhere without Fox."
"Well then." Ramiro said pulling out his sword, "Do you want me to flambe you, so you can become a nice tropical bird dinner."
"I can beat you up right now if I wanted to." Falco replied.
"Oh so Falco the bird is chicken, bawk bawk bawk!"
"That's it both of you, stop acting like children." Zelda said getting in between the both of them.
"Hey what happened...? Did we get stoned or something? And who's the lady?" Danny asked getting up and noticing Meta Knight was staring at him.
"Danny, shut up." Ramiro replied.
"You be quiet Ramiro."
"Both of you be quiet already." Zelda replied.
"That's it I had enough of this weird fest." Falco replied jumping off the edge heading to parts unknown.
"Ugh, what the hell happened?" Johnathan said realizing he was as short at Meta Knight, "Can someone explain why Meta Knight is here and why am I as short as him?"
"John, it's me Ramiro." Ramiro replied.
"Oh God I'm having a dream again aren't I?" Said Carlos who was Fox waking up.
"No, no your not, and apparently your fox." Ramiro replied.
"Aww man why couldn't I have been Snake or Ike, he would've been so much cooler." Carlos whined then realizing he had a gun, he took it out and shot Danny off of the stage. "I'ma firing mah Lazor!"
"Dude this isn't the game he doesn't respawn back, he goes somewhere else." Ramiro replied.
"We'll go after him, I'll tell you all what happened while we get there." Zelda replied jumping off the edge followed by John, Ramiro, and Carlos.
Meanwhile watching them from behind some pillars were two known villains, Bowser and Wario, "Hey Bowser you thinking what I'm thinking?"
"You mean following them and capturing the princess for Ganondorf so he won't be pissed anymore?" Bowser asked wondering if he thought the same.
"Oh I was going to say grab a bite of pizza and then report back to the others but um that works too." Wario replied.
"Do you ever think of anything besides pizza?" Bowser asked slightly annoyed.
"Um let's see no not really but still let's follow them." Wario said hopping up and walking off the wrong edge.
"You idiot that was the wrong ledge, why the hell do I have to be working with this guy." Bowser said to himself while jumping down after Wario.
-Meanwhile at the Mario Cart Circuit-
Danny was walking across the street after watching for incoming cars. After that he left the area in search of Carlos so that he may kill him.
Several minutes afterword's Zelda, Ramiro, Carlos, and John got to the track, "So what are we waiting for?" Asked Ramiro, he then started to run across the street when he got hit by a shy guy driving a cart, "I should've payed more attention." He then tried to get up but got run over more by more shy guys. "Oww... that freaking hurts!"
"Eh Ramiro this is the first time we see you cross the street without looking, good thing were in a game not in real life." Carlos replied.
"Carlos, shut up." Ramiro said crawling to the other side of the road now safe from the cars.
John decided to do something else, he puffed up and floated across the street.
"Wait how are we supposed to get across?" Carlos asked.
"We wait for them to finish their next lap across here and then run for it." Zelda replied.
"Okay we'll be going." Ramiro replied running straight forward followed by John.
"Well this'll be a while." Carlos replied. "So... what you explained is that a portal you were testing accidently brought us here?"
"Yes, that's exactly what happened, unfortunately I don't know how to get you guys back to your world so your going to have to stay here for now."
"Sweet no freaking school." Carlos replied.
"Your taking this well."
"Hell yeah, I don't even think I need to sleep, ah forget it I'm running across the street without looking both ways." Carlos said running across the street before a red shelled spike turtle hit him, there was a Koopa in a cloud throwing them. "Ah I hated these things when I played Super Mario for the game boy and I hate them now!" Carlos said running in the direction Ramiro and John went, Zelda just sighed.
"These are supposed to be the Hero's the prophecy said about but then again it could always be wrong."
"Hey Zelda, are these the guys the prophecy talked about?" Said a green in clad warrior, he was Link wielder of the Master Sword.
"Yes, yes they are."
"Their very interesting, just wait till everyone else get's a load out of these guys."
"Well we need their help to defeat the villains."
"Um yeah, we only have 4 of them to deal about, thankfully King Dedede is too busy trying to bust people for breaking the law."
"Seriously, Oh my..."
"It's not as bad as it looks, he caught this guy who kept throwing bombs at the people who would try to cross the bridge of Eldin."
-Meanwhile at New Pork City-
Meta Knight and Kirby, err I mean Ramiro and John were hopping from platform to platform, "Well this is a very large place, Danny could be anywhere."
"Well the sooner we find him the better, cause I have a feeling he's going to be causing trouble for people."
"Seriously, well you have known Danny longer than me John, so I guess so."
-Meanwhile on top of a Pirate Ship-
"Falcon Punch!" Danny said hitting Olimar off of it and knocking him into the ocean. "Well that was fun, time to see what other stuff there is." He then proceeded to go to a different place.
John and Ramiro were hot on his trail, at New Pork City they saw Ness and Lucas in the fetal position rolling around, apparently at the Kongo Jungle, which included a bar, he beat up Falco and Donkey Kong, while taking a stroll on the Rainbow Cruise he broke the ship and made Luigi, and Yoshi plummet downwards to their demise, and while taking a Pirate Ship cruise he beat up Wolf.
The trail of Danny doing stuff lead them to Delfino Plaza, Ramiro saw some chairs and umbrellas so he sat down at a table, "This place would be the last place Danny would go you know?"
"Yeah I know."
"Then why would he be here?"
"I don't know."
"Eh oh well it's nice to be two puffballs while relaxing, the only thing I don't like about being Meta Knight is that I'm so short." Ramiro replied picking up a glass of water, he was about to drink it when it got cut in half, "Hey, I was about to drink that!"
"Meta Knight, I want a rematch!" replied a stranger who had a blade pointed at Ramiro.
"No not you please let it be someone else, Bowser, Ganondorf, heck even Olimar, But not you!" Ramiro replied backing up again.
"That's right it's me Marth! And I want a rematch of our game of Chess!"
"Chess? Fuck that, I don't know how to play Chess, seriously I thought we were going to sword fight or something like that."
"Then why were you acting like you were surprised?"
"For dramatic effect, I mean we would've ended there but the story would've been too short."
"Um Ramiro, your breaking the fourth wall, you cannot break the fourth wall." John said whispering to Ramiro.
"Um…. The only wall is the one behind us, and I doubt it's the fourth wall we've been to…."
"Are you usually an idiot?" Marth asked slightly annoyed.
"No, no I'm not."
-Meanwhile at the Batcav- Err I mean Final Destination-
Two floating hands were talking to each other, which would surprise anyone who would talk to them. One was fidgeting his fingers around and moving around slightly agitated but he wasn't really agitated. The other one was just calm and floating in the air.
"So Crazy, do you think these guys have what it takes to beat the whole impending doom and stuff like that?"
"I don't know brother but still you want to read this magazine I'm reading it's a hoot!"
"Crazy, you don't have eyes, how can yo-"
"Well who says talking hands can't read a Magazine? (That's what I say!)
"Fine but crazy I think that Danny kid beating up everyone else is better than a magazine."
"Ooh seriously? That's even crazier than my dancing animal collection!"
"Crazy, I told you to get rid of that, what if the animals go on a rampage and attack the smashers?"
"Well they won't they'll annoy them to death!"
"That's still not the point Crazy the point is just watch what's going on."
==== Flash Back time! ====
After Danny had left Ness and Lucas mentally scarred he decided to go grab a beer at the bar in the Kongo jungle, unfortunately there was a line of two people, so he decided to cut in front of the person who was about to be next, Donkey Kong.
"Hey what do you think your doing Falcon? I'm first, and your last."
"Your Momma's last!"
"What did you just say?"
"Oh!" Falco replied trying to act like a crowd.
"Oh let me rephrase that, your Momma's so big that she's bigger and blacker than giant donkey kong!"
"Oh!"
"Stop that Falco before I knock you out!" Donkey Kong said angrily now acting like a real ape.
"Oh yeah punch out the guy who's giving me support, to bad your dad didn't give your mom support cause he decided to leave her!"
"That's it!" Donkey Kong said swinging his arm ready to do his signature punch when…. BAM! Danny used his Falcon Punch without even having to say the name which took up 5 seconds less time.
"Falcon Punch!" And that sent Donkey Kong flying into Falco, "Well I'm bored now, lets see what else there is." Danny said then looking at an ad for a cruise.
Danny's jaw dropped when he found out that the cruise was Yoshi's and Luigi's rainbow cruise, "I hate Rainbows!" He said getting several Bob-omb's and throwing them at the ship which when they hit the ship made it drop to the ground below because most of it was destroyed in the process.
-Back to the present!-
Master Hand sighed while Crazy Hand laughed like the maniac he was, "Whoever got Captain Falcon's body is one funny person."
"I'm glad to see you're amused, so what do you think will happen when they see us?"
"Um let's see… freak out, they'll freak out even more because of my invisible person museum!"
"Crazy, your just making up stuff so that you can make yourself more crazy aren't you?" Master hand said floating and hitting an invisible wall, "What the hell is this?"
"Um my invisible person museum….."
"Why is the museum invisible too?"
"Cause then it wouldn't be an invisible historic person museum!" Crazy hand replied laughing while floating off.
"Sometimes I just don't understand my brother…" Master Hand replied then heading off as well.
-Meanwhile at Delfino Plaza-
Surprisingly Ramiro was doing better as Meta Knight, he kept blocking all of Marth's attacks and then kept slashing at him as well, they continued their battle until they were almost tired, so John grabbed Marth jumped up into the air and slammed down on the ground sending Marth flying, all while saying, "Kirby Hug!"
"You just had to turn his awesome grapple into a gay name didn't you John?"
"What do you expect it's me….."
"You make a good point…."
"Well at least Marth is out of your hair."
"I don't think I have hair."
"Um well your mask, you have a mask."
"Okay, besides how many other Swordsman would dare take me on, I mean I'm one of the best!"
"I will take that indirect challenge!" Said another Swordsman, this one was Ike, and at his sight Ramiro groaned.
"This is going to be a long day…"
-Meanwhile on top of the Great Fox-
"Well thankfully I have this sweet ride to find everybody in…. now if only I could find out how to get in it and change it's course instead of it just flying through this same Area over and over again….." Carlos said trying to get in but realized it was smaller than what it was supposed to be, "Wait this is a freaking scaled down model!"
"Hello Fox…." Said a familiar voice to which Carlos turned around to see who it was.
"Not you, anyone but you, I mean Marth, even Pikachu, or Mario, even R.O.B., but not you!"
"Yes it is I, Wolf, now I shall tell you why I have come here…."
"Is it going to be something stupid or serious?"
"Serious…."
"Okay good then I should run!"
"You won't be escaping anywhere!" Wolf said about to strike at Fox when Marth fell down from the sky and landed on him.
"Curse that Kirby….. Why'd he have to ruin mine and Meta Knights fight…?"
"You saw those two?" Carlos said pulling out his gun.
"Yeah why do you ask?" Marth asked.
"Where are they?"
"Delfino Plaza…."
"Okay good, to the Arwing Mobile!" Carlos said jumping over them, getting in his Arwing and flying off.
Will Ramiro get a break as Meta Knight? Will Danny stop being crazy on steroids? Will John actually use one of Kirby's cool powers? And does Carlos even know how to fly an Arwing? Stay tuned for the next Chapter of Super Smash Bros. Mayhem!
Me: Well that was the first chapter.
Crazy Hand: Oh I do love my craziness.
Me: Well you're probably going to be crazier in future chapters.
Crazy Hand: True, I am Crazy Hand after all.
Me: Anyway Rate and Review! Hope you enjoyed.