Falling:

Rated M

Inspired by Annie Proulx's characters and the film of BBM.

Ennis had spent a frustrating time with the Basque. It seemed they were to be given only very basic provisions, and anyway they never got everything they ordered – no powdered milk this time and no extra spuds. Ennis, not one to normally make a fuss, had protested mildly, but then loaded up the mules anyway.

On his journey back to camp Ennis relaxed, he was in his element on horseback, no one to bother him here, just had to lead the mules and make sure he didn't lose the way. He could think about Jack. He looked forward to seeing him at supper. Ennis had ordered fewer beans for their next supplies because Jack was sick of beans, and it pleased Ennis to try to please Jack.

Almost unconsciously he started humming what to anyone listening here in Wyoming would be 'The Streets of Laredo' a cowboy lament – but Ennis's mother being part Irish had sung 'Molly Malone' to the same tune, a song to a sweetheart, and he thought of these words in his head. Instead of Molly, Ennis thought of Jack.

On a flatter stretch where the mules followed like a dream, Ennis fell into a deeper reverie shortly before he fell for real: off his horse. He came upon a young bear at the creek almost as scared as Ennis – it growled and ambled off but Ennis, who prided himself on his horsemanship, fell as the horse reared. Grimly as he plummeted towards the ground the thought came to him of all the times he'd advised Jack on the mare with the low startle point – but as far as he knew he'd never fallen off, mastered the mare in fact.

Ennis had been cautious all his life, to keep safe, but hadn't counted on nature taking him unexpectedly – in the end it wouldn't be just the bear that did this – but Ennis had no forethought about this, tried to think as little as possible in fact, as even thoughts could be dangerous.

The mules took off scattering food cartons everywhere. Ennis, who had sustained a nasty gash to his head, searched for the 'ornery critters' and tried to find as much of the supplies as he could. He mostly could only find the tins of beans and knew Jack would not be happy.

Jack arrived back for supper cold, tired and hungry – no fire, no Ennis. At the back of his mind Jack thought his companion had just up and left the mountain as they'd had a few disagreements lately mostly about food. Jack also wasn't pleased about Ennis directing him and telling him how to stay on his mount, he'd had enough of the like with his old man, who thought he could do nothing right. If Ennis had gone so be it. He made camp, then huddled over the fire as day turned into night drinking his whiskey, then began to worry about Ennis - maybe an accident, bear, anything.

Just then he heard the noise of hooves clattering, heard the words 'Fuck' and 'Old bastard' which Ennis directed at the lead mule as he dismounted his horse.

Ennis was tired and hungry now; the huge gash on the side of his face hurt like hell, the blood had at last congealed and stopped dripping. Ennis explained what had happened to a concerned Jack, and asked for whiskey. Ennis was from a family of strict Methodists who did not drink but he'd caught the habit from this companion who now offered the bottle of Old Rose.

Jack took his bandanna from around his neck and soaked it in the scolding water he'd been heating over the fire, then dabbed at the wound. This had a strange affect on Ennis who jumped not just from the sting of it – the last male to touch him had been his older brother who was heavy with his slaps and punches….. why he and Alma hardly touched although they were engaged. As he looked sideways at Jack a sudden overpowering need to be held by his friend came upon him, he was momentarily taken aback by the beauty of the boy's lovely face in the firelight. As he took the bandanna inadvertently their fingers touched - both boys felt the electricity between them. Their eyes held each other's gaze for a second then Jack sat back down lowering his head, gazing into the fire. If it had been daylight Ennis would have seen the rosy glow on his friend's face, and not just from the firelight.

Jack suggested shooting one of the sheep to eat as he didn't feel inclined to eat even more beans for days. Ennis said that they were supposed to be guarding the sheep and said he'd stick with beans whereupon Jack said he wouldn't.

Then right there and then in his tired mind Ennis formulated a plan, something to do with an elk - anything to keep this beautiful boy happy. He didn't know it yet but as well as having fallen off his horse he was now falling in love.

(Note: The word 'Molly' is an old now defunct British word for male homosexual. In 18th century England there were Molly Houses which were male brothels. I'm not sure if the screenwriters realised this and meant Ennis to be humming 'Molly Malone' which is also known as 'Cockles and Mussels'. Larry McMurtry one of BBM's screenwriters also wrote a novel 'The Streets of Laredo' - the title of the alternative version to the same tune.

Maybe we can take it as either or both - the screenwriters thereby highlighting ambiguity or conflict: Ennis's feelings for Jack v being a straight cowboy, and also the wider view of the macho Western cowboy v a reality not so clear cut. Or maybe they didn't realise the connotations at all to do with the songs.)