AN. I decided to write this after reading xxRellikxx's story Locked and Caged. Then I realized that there was a whole C2 for Jasper/Bella stories, and I decided this would be the perfect idea.

Just Tryin' to Kill The Pain

BPOV

I was a mess, I admit. Ed... he had left me only three months ago, and I had done a complete one-eighty. I admit it, I was pissed, and I showed it. I had cut my hair, making it short, and layered, and dyed it a deep red. I had also gotten two tattoos, a dragon on my left thigh, and a black rose a drop of blood on the stem on my lower back. Wouldn't he love to see me now? I thought sarcastically as I wearily got out of the shower, pulling on my black Type O Negative tank-top, and short, black shorts. It wasn't like I was going anywhere.

I got downstairs, and quickly ate a chocolate chip waffle, before going over to the couch. What should I watch? I wondered. I sighed, and flipped to the channel of some horror movie, Jason Goes To Hell. I heard a faint knock on the front door, and jumped up, surprised. Nobody ever came over anymore, not since... Banishing that thought from my mind, I pulled open the front door, and was shocked to see Jasper Hale standing in my doorway.

"Oh my god. Jasper!" I whispered. He stepped closer, and closed the door behind him. "Bella. Your a mess." He said. I knew this, and didn't need it pointed out. "I know Jasper." I whispered almost inaudibly.

He reached out hesitantly, almost as if he was testing his control, and gently touched the dark circles under my eyes. "When was the last time you slept Bella?" I couldn't even remember. It was so long ago that I had slept through the night. I had nightmares every night, always in the same forest. "Not long ago." I lied. Jasper sent me a look. He knew I was lying. The space was filled with silence, and after a while Jasper sighed, breaking our staring contest. "Fine." I walked back over to the couch, Jasper following behind me. I sat down on the couch and placed my arms on my legs, hiding my face from view.

He put one hand against my cheek. I looked up, tears threatening to overflow. "It's hard Bella, I understand." I nodded, and reached up to wipe away the tears. "Jasper, why did you decide to come here?" I asked. He had always been the most distant from me, and I didn't understand this now. He could feel my confusion and smiled slightly before his face broke. "Alice and I, we got a divorce, she fell in love with a vampire we met, and I decided to come see you. I missed you and I was worried about you." I was shocked. Ever time I had seen Alice and Jasper together, they had been completely in love, and they seemed so happy. I couldn't imagine one without the other. Almost like I had once imagined Edward and I.

Without thinking I hugged Jasper. He seemed surprised for a second, and then he hugged me back. After I pulled away, blushing for the first time in months, I whispered. "Why were you so surprised Jasper?" I was genuinely curious. "It's always seemed as if you were afraid of me." He explained. I sighed, trying to think of how to describe it. "Well, I wasn't really afraid of you, more... intimidated. I just didn't have the nerve to talk to you." I admitted quietly. He laughed quietly and hugged me again.

"Do you want to try to sleep?" Jasper asked. I was nervous. What if I had the nightmare with Jasper around? I nodded, and he helped me lay across the couch, partially on his lap. I closed my eyes, and he placed a cold hand against my cheek. Within seconds I had drifted to sleep.

I wander aimlessly around the graveyard, the tombs rising up from the cold mist that floated around my ankles. I shivered and the silence seemed ominous. I started to run, the shadows chasing me, close at my heels. I twisted around as I ran, a horrible mistake, and fell, sprawled backwards. The wind stilled, and I turned over preparing to stand again when something on the grave caught my eye. "We shall roam on the banks of the river of peace and bathe in it's blissful tides and our greatest joy shall always be the young woman that died." I gasped, and my gaze traveled farther up. My morbid curiousity forcing me to find the name. Tears poured down my face as the name registered in my thoughts. Alice Cullen. I jerked to my feet, and whipped around, desperate, only to be met with the looming tombs, shouting the names at me: Esme Cullen, Rosalie Hale, Emmett Cullen, Carlisle Cullen, Edward Cullen.

"Bella! Bella!"Jasper yelled, as I sat up, screaming. I threw my arms around Jasper, and he pulled me close, comforting me as tears poured down my cheeks. "What's wrong Bella, what happened?" Jasper asked, and I tried to gather my breath. "All of the... Cullen's... they... they... were... dead!" I screamed the last word, my voice cracking. He pulled me closer, and after a minute, my tears slowed. I pulled away and he smiled at me. "Don't worry, I'm fine, I was just overreacting, it was just a dream."

We ended up going to the Cullen's old house, and we started talking. We had asked each other hundreds of questions, and then the conversation of music came up. I answered his question honestly. "Well, I used to love classical music, but I hadn't really listened to much else. Now I like rock music, and I"ll even listen to heavy metal. I don't play an instrument, I wish! What about you?" I replied. "I listen to mostly rock, and I play the guitar." I smiled. "Can I hear?" He seemed surprised, but stood up, and disappeared up the stairs.

Less than a minute later he returned back down the stairs with an Fender electric guitar, and a portable amp. He sat down and plugged the guitar into the amp, and looked up at me. I was facinated. The guitar had always held a specific interest for me, and this one was no exception. It was a deep black, the edges rimmed in red, with orange, red-rimmed flames across it. "What do you want to hear?" He asked. I thought for a second. "Hmm, there is one. What about November Rain by Guns N' Roses?" I asked. He nodded, and began to play.

When I look into your eyes I can see a love restrained But darlin' when I hold you Don't you know I feel the same 'Cause nothin' lasts forever And we both know hearts can change And it's hard to hold a candle In the cold November rain We've been through this Such a long long time Just tryin' to kill the pain Yeahh.. But lovers always come And lovers always go And no one's really sure Who's lettin' go today Walking away If we could take the time To lay it on the line I could rest my head Just knowin' that you were mine All mine So if you want to love me Then darlin' don't refrain Or I'll just end up walkin' In the cold November rain
Do you need some time On your own Do you need some time All alone Everybody needs some time On their own Don't you know you need some time All alone
I know it's hard to keep an open heart When even friends seem out to harm you But if you could heal a broken heart Wouldn't time be out to charm you
Sometimes I need some time On my own Sometimes I need some time All alone Everybody needs some time On their own Don't you know you need some time All alone
And when your fears subside And shadows still remain I know that you can love me When there's no one left to blame So never mind the darkness We still can find a way 'Cause nothin' lasts forever Even cold November rain
Don't ya think that you Need somebody Don't ya think that you Need someone Everybody needs somebody You're not the only one You're not the only one
Don't ya think that you Need somebody Don't ya think that you Need someone Everybody needs somebody You're not the only one You're not the only one
Don't ya think that you Need somebody Don't ya think that you Need someone Everybody needs somebody You're not the only one You're not the only one
Don't ya think that you Need somebody Don't ya think that you Need someone Everybody needs somebody

He stopped and set the guitar down, to come sit next to me. "Jasper, that was amazing!" I threw my arms around him and he laughed, pulling me closer to him. "Charlie will get back soon." I sighed. He nodded, and lifted me easily, carrying me out to the car. I giggled, and fought half-heartedly, truly having fun. When we got back to my house, Jasper sat down on the couch. "Should Charlie know I'm here?" He asked. I bit my lip, and he sensed my anxiety. I nodded, and went into the kitchen to go make dinner for Charlie.

After dinner I said a quick goodnight to Charlie, who was to preoccupied with the ESPN to pay attention to my hasty retreat. I dashed up the stairs, and was met by Jasper sitting on the end of my bed. I smiled, and whispered. "I'll be right back." I grabbed my red tank-top, and my black pants, and went into the bathroom. I turned on the radio, and climbed into the shower. The song Gone Forever by Three Days Grace came on and I started singing along.

Don't know what's going on Don't know what went wrong Feels like a hundred years I still can't believe you're gone So I'll stay up all night With these blood shot eyes While these walls surround me With the story of our life

I feel so much better Now that you're gone forever I tell myself that I don't miss you at all Not lying, denying that I feel so much better Now that you're gone forever

Now things are coming clear And I don't need you here And in this world around me I'm glad you disappeared So I'll stay out all night Get drunk and fucking fight Until the morning comes I'll forget about our life

I feel so much better Now that you're gone forever I tell myself that I don't miss you at all Not lying, denying that I feel so much better Now that you're gone forever
First time you screamed at me I should have made you leave I should have known it could be so much better I hope you're missing me I hope I've made you see That I'm gone forever

And now it's coming clear That I don't need you here And in this world around me I'm glad you disappeared

I feel so much better Now that you're gone forever I tell myself that I don't miss you at all I'm not lying, denying that I feel so much better Now that you're gone forever And now that you're gone forever
And now you're gone forever

I quickly dried my hair, and finished getting ready before dashing back into my bedroom. Jasper still sat on the end of my bed, a perfect statue, more perfect than any Adonis. Than my Adonis. I gasped, surprised at my own thoughts. Jasper was my brother, and yet... I shook away the thoughts, and went over to the bed. I sat down, and Jasper moved next to me, in a lightning fast movement.

It was a good day, it truly was. Edward. I could finally think his name, without the sharp stabbing pain that would jerk my chest open. It seemed as though I was healing, I didn't know if the hole would ever fully heal, but it was getting better, bearable, and it was all because of my savior, Jasper.

AN. Do you hate it? I know I suck at it, especially the dream part, and I promise that I will stop writing this story if you ask me to. xxRellikxx if this seems very similar to the beginning of your story I am very very sorry, but I promise to you that it will be extrordinarily different than your story, I swear!
My Explaination:
1.) The hairstyle described for Bella is actually Pink's from the music video U & Ur Hand, from when she is in the gym. Her tattoo on her thigh is also Pink's.
2.) I had to add in Jason Goes To Hell, because I watched it, and I luved it.
3.) What it said on the grave, "We shall roam on the banks of the river of peace and bathe in it's blissful tides and our greatest joy shall always be the young woman that died." That is from a little girl's grave that I saw, but it said "little girl" instead of "young woman"
4.) Yes, I love rock and heavy metal music, and I have seen a guitar that looks like this before, it was even a Fender.
5.) This song's credit belongs solely with the band Guns N' Roses. It's an awesome song but I dont own it.
6.) This song's credit belongs solely with the band Three Days Grace. It's amazing, and I don't own it.
7.) Adonis is how Bella described Edward. Yes, Bella was comparing Jasper to Edward.
8.) I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT! I just like to manipulate Stephenie Meyer's fantastic stories, and twist them to my own theme.