Alternate ending of OST and what should have happened, in my opinion.
Warning: A few spoilers here and there.
Dicslaimer: Nothing belongs to me.
Jack Sparrow was in a predicament that he would never expect to be in, but nevertheless, he found himself in just the situation he was hoping to avoid. Standing waist deep in the water, he eyed his rowboat which was currently sitting on the bottom of the ocean floor, and however shallow the water was, there was no hope to retrieve his only chance of escape.
"Now love, that wasn't very nice."
"You bastard!" Angelica cried, storming into the water and marching up to him. "You killed my father!"
"Hm," Jack mused, nudging the boat that laid in the water with the toe of his now-soaked boots. "Indeed I did."
"I cannot believe you!" Angelica screeched, lashing out at Jack with a fist. He dodged it easily, moving surprisingly gracefully in the water.
"I may have killed your father, along with many other things, but that's no reason to sink my boat," Jack said, waving his finger back and forth. "Naughty girl."
"Argh!" Angelica screamed, lunging at him again. This time she managed to latch onto him and drag him under the water. Jack thrashed, surprised, and fought to unlatch the woman from him. But Angelica was determined to keep him under, and she placed all of her body weight against him.
Sorry darling, Jack thought to himself. This might hurt.
Angelica abruptly let go of Jack, jerking away from him with a cry. Jack sprung out from under the water, gasping and choking on water. Stumbling, he stood back up in the water, his bloody sword clenched in one hand.
"Bastard!" Angelica yelled, holding her side where he had pierced her with his sword.
Jack twirled the weapon, smiling slightly. "You forgot the other favor I did for you," he said sweetly. "You drank from that cup with a mermaid's tear. No weapon can harm you."
Angelica looked down at her cut, and watched as it healed, leaving not even a scar behind. "I hate you," she hissed.
"Whatever happened to that confession only moments ago?" Jack drawled. "'I love you' and all that?"
"I take it back," Angelica snarled. "I hope you rot in hell."
"I agree," Jack announced grandly. "We better get started on our confessions. It looks like we might be here for awhile." He started striding back towards the island, determination in his step.
"What?" Angelica snapped. "No! I would rather die here alone than stay here with you!"
"Well love, you should have thought of that before you shot my boat and sunk it. Mind you, I had no idea a bullet hole could sink a boat that fast, but either way, I'm stuck here with you," Jack said brightly, pausing to turn around and face her.
"What about your ship? Isn't it waiting for you?" Angelica said desperately. She did not want to spend any more time with the man who ruined her life any more than she had to.
"Ah, see, there's the mistake on my part," Jack mused. "My loyal first mate is standing on that ship, waiting," he said, gesturing to the ship that was located not too far away. "If he doesn't see me coming back on that rowboat within the next few minutes, that means I'd rather stay here. And then, why, he's off as the new captain of me ship."
"Why would you ever choose to stay here rather than be the captain of a ship?" Angelica questioned, furious.
"Questions, questions, most of which I don't have an answer to," Jack said, waving his hand dismissively. "The point is, from where he is it looks like I chose to stay here, judging by the absence of the rowboat and the hug you just gave me."
"I did not give you a hug. And I never will," Angelica added in as an afterthought.
Jack shrugged. "Maybe so, but from there it must have looked like you were snogging me underwater." He winked, and then continued to stride back to the island.
Angelica stood near the sunken rowboat, horrified. "Jack, that is the most awful, horrific, and most stupid plan I have ever heard of!"
Jack continued to fight his way through the water and back to the island. "I'm glad we're on a name-basis now. May I still call you 'love'?"
"Are you even listening?" Angelica screeched. "That is a god-awful plan, and not thought through at all!"
"Maybe so," Jack grunted, "but I didn't exactly plan on sinking my only way out of here. This plan would seem a lot more thought-through if you hadn't sunk my boat. Now I just look foolish."
Angelica threw her hands up into the air in frustration.
"That, my dear, is not helping my situation," Jack advised. "From where me ship is, it looks like you're throwing your hands up in joy that I'm staying with you."
Angelica shot him a deadpan look. "No Jack, it doesn't."
Jack shrugged. "You're not on that boat a mile away from us, are you?"
"I wish you were," Angelica grumbled, following Jack to the beach. "Can't you signal them or…something? Swim out to the boat?"
"I could wave my sword in the air, and that would probably catch their attention," Jack mused. "But that would just look silly."
Before Jack could stop her, Angelica snatched the sword out of his hands and waved it in the air desperately.
"I'm telling you, it's not going to work," Jack said, crossing his arms.
Approximately a mile away on the deck of the ship, Gibbs stood watch, peering out to the island, watching Jack through a telescope.
"Whatdya see, Gibbs?" a crew member questioned, following his gaze towards the island. "Is Jack gonna be de Captain? Or is you?"
Gibbs grunted, watching as Angelica pointed her arms out at Jack. "I d'unno…from what I see, Miss Angelica is try'n to get Jack to come back."
"Is he rowin' away? Or is he goin back to'er?"
Gibbs paused, watching silently. "I d'unno…Jack's boat is sinkin. He doesn't seem worried or nothin'. He's gettin out. Miss Angelica is walkin' to 'im."
The crewmember seemed enchanted by his play-by-play. "What's happenin' now?"
"Aye. De boat's gone. Sunk," Gibbs said. "But Jack isn't lookin' worried."
"What 'bout Miss Angelica? What's she doin'?"
"She…grabbed him. They's underwater. Kissin' or something, probably."
The crewmember made a face of disgust. "So is you gonna be the new captian? Jack don't seem interested in comin' back."
"We should wait till Jack signals me…" Gibbs said slowly.
The crewmember looked uncertain. "Are ya sure, Gibbs? Maybe we should get'a goin."
"They's talkin…"Gibbs continued. "Now Jack's goin back to the island. Not lookin' back. Miss Angelica is followin'."
"Sounds to me like he doesn't wanna be captain no more," the crewmember said. "I knew dat Miss Angelica was important to 'im."
Gibbs grunted, still watching. He was silent for awhile, and then let out a noise of surprise. "There's Miss Angelica. She took Jack's sword and she's a'wavin."
"Sayin' goodbye!" the crewmember crowed joyfully.
Gibbs paused in disbelief. Jack was finally done with being a pirate? He thought he'd never see the day.
"Goodbye Captain! Goodbye Miss Angelica!" the crewmember yelled. The other men on the crew joined in his calls, waving to their beloved captain.
"Aye!" Gibbs yelled after awhile, allowing the crew to say goodbye. "It's true, Jack Sparrow is done bein' a captain. But he was the greatest captain this here ship ever saw, and we will never forget 'im. Long live Jack Sparrow!"
"Long live Jack Sparrow!" the crew echoed.
"Now, we best get'a goin'!" Gibbs hollered. "All hands on deck! To Tortuga!"
"Now what did I tell you," Jack said, eyeing the ship. "It didn't work."
Angelica stared in disbelief, watching as the ship slowly began to turn away from them. "Why are they leaving? They should be coming back to take you with them!"
"Aye, it most likely looked like you were waving goodbye to them," Jack said amusedly. "Bless their clueless hearts."
"No!" Angelica screamed. "I will not be stuck here with you!"
"If it makes you feel any better, I'll die before you," Jack said, stepping onto dry land. "But," he said, turning. "Don't you be getting any ideas."
Angelica was beyond furious. "You turn around and swim back to that ship, or so help me, I will run you through with this sword." She held up Jack's sword for emphasis.
Jack put his hands up with a grin. "Please do. I'd rather be run through with a sword than drown out in the ocean. Nasty, that saltwater is."
"Oh, you'll change your mind when you feel this sword through your gut," Angelica snarled, stabbing the air towards him.
Jack didn't even flinch. "Go right on ahead, love. Really. Stab me. Kill me. If that's what you're willing to give me in return for giving you eternal life and disposing of your filthy father, that's your choice."
Without a blink of an eye, Angelica lunged forward, slashing Jack's side with his own sword.
Jack let out a grunt of pain and fell to the sand, holding his side. "Well," he wheezed, breathless with pain. "I really didn't think you'd actually do that."
Angelica looked down on him with a sneer. "That's for calling my father filthy." She threw his weapon down on the sand at his knees, and stalked away.
Jack watched her leave, and then used his sword to shakily stand up. "You know," he called back, "I'm starting to really rethink this plan of mine."
"You mean your plan where the ship left without you?" Angelica asked, eyes narrowed.
"Yes, that one," Jack said, standing up straighter.
"You're just now regretting it?" Angelica asked with a sneer.
"Running through my gut with my own sword really made me think," Jack said painfully. "And you know what I realized?"
"What?" Angelica asked, a hand on her hip.
"I really made a mistake in that plan," Jack continued.
"And what mistake was that?"
"I really shouldn't have made Gibbs the replacement captain. Really poor planning on my part, I admit," Jack said, brushing the sand off of his legs.
"I am going to KILL you!" Angelica screeched. "You are the most infuriating, undependable, twisted, corrupted, most awful man I have ever met!"
"Well, that's quite a compliment," Jack said, beaming. "I'm sure you've met a bunch of men and I'm the worst of them all? Really, love, you're too sweet."
Angelica was past furious. She was boiling. Swearing and cursing him out in Spanish, she stalked away, towards the small patch of trees in the middle of the island.
"Love," Jack called out. "You might want to look out, there's-"
Angelica abruptly tripped over a washed-up piece of driftwood, falling to her knees in the sand.
"-a piece of driftwood there," Jack finished lamely.
"Don't say a word!" Angelica snarled, continuing her trek as far away from Jack as possible.
Jack laughed, and then laid back in the sand, staring at the sky. "Aye, where's the rum when you need it?"
I was going to make this multi-chaptered, but then I realized that it was fine where it ended.
And I was too lazy and/or not very motivated to write any more.
Review, me hearties! –shot-