Warning: AU, Religion based.

No personal comment or view. Please read as it is.

Pairing: One sided TeFu (Fuji to Tezuka)

Enjoy!


The mass ended like the usual, and one by one, people started to leave the hall.

Fuji, the head and the only currently available priest, looked sadly at the decreasing number of church goers. It used to be very lively; with families with their crying babies, children running to him to get blessings after mass, teenagers and young adults stayed behind to have fun activities on the garden, the choir members celebrated their success mass with some morning coffee treats. It used to be full of happiness, warmth, and energy. Everybody came to meet their Creator, praising Him, seeking enlighten in faith.

Reminiscing his memories when he was still the permanent Altar Boy, Fuji sighed. It has been 25 years ago that the deceased Head Priest took him in. He was left in front of the church, with no name or identity. And since then he was raised in the church. His life was already laid in front of him; he lived in the small house beside the church, alongside all other priests; being the altar and errand boy. He was loved, by all three priests who lived there. He was showered with attention, yet he was never spoiled; because they have neither intention nor resource to spoil him. Fuji was raised under strict religion rules; and his mind was already set to be the next priest.

Yet it was too late; the three priests were already old when he was still a baby, so by the time he ended his religion school, Fuji came back just in time to watch the Head Priest took his last breath. And there were no more old priests left, since they were transferred or deceased before Fuji came back.

Fuji knew his Father is the Holy Father who resides high above. But in his heart, he knew that the Head Priest has been his father all along. Not by blood, but mentally. The man guided him, taught him happiness, accompany him throughout his lonely days, and made Fuji knew that he was born to be loved.

And when the funeral ended, Fuji started to realize that he would soon fight a never-ending enemy: loneliness.


The village was small, everyone used to know everybody. Just until the road was opened, it was the straight highway to the cities nearby. People started to notice the potential in that old, forgotten village. Land price hiked up. Old residents started to leave, the new people started to pour in. Neighbours became foreigners, newly innovated business started to open and killing the old traditional ones. Everybody grew apart and even further away from the old church on top of the hill.

Fuji noticed how the serene village turned into a busy port. Drivers from cities nearby need to stop on the village to replenish their energy and resources. Everybody was in a rush, and nobody cared to say 'How are you' to strangers. And subsequently, nobody even care to spare a minute to go to the old Church to pray anymore.

He looked at the empty donation box. It was getting harder and harder, and although he was never indulged in luxury, Fuji started to realize that it was impossible for him to live a day with a single stale bread and tap water.

Fuji kneeled on the padded prayer altar, staring at the huge cross over his head.

Holy Father, please guide this humble soul through these temptations.

His mind was occupied with the Holy Father and his Holy Son, when suddenly the heavy wooden door was opened. Fuji lost his concentration and looked back. It was the first of his sin. Just like how Lot's wife turned back and became pillar of salt, Fuji was cursed the second he turned his attention away from his Holy Father.

Stood in front of the door, was a man. He looked serious and troubled, with eyebrows knitted against each other. His glasses covered the otherwise beautiful eyes, his black hair messy from the winds. His clothes were proper, although a bit rumpled.

"Father."

His voice sent chills through Fuji's spine. He swallowed his sudden awkwardness and stood up.

"Yes, my child. May I help you?"

"Tell me how to pray."

It turned out that the man's name was Tezuka, and his son, Ryouma, was sick. He was hospitalized in the only hospital in the village, and was undergoing an operation with fifty-fifty success chance.

"But why…," Fuji asked out of curiosity, "…This village? We only have one hospital and there are many better equipped hospitals on either city by the ends of the highway."

"We were just passing;" Tezuka reasoned, "to the next city for the real surgery. But he suddenly got another attack, and they can't postpone the surgery. Two hours are needed to drive to the next city and my son shan't be alive till then."

Fuji watched how wretched the man seemed, minute by minute. The grown man was crying in silent, tears flowing, face unchanged. Tezuka wasn't ashamed to show the tears of his love for his son. Fuji learned afterward that Tezuka was not really a believer, but he needed to hang on something. His wife has died 3 years ago, leaving Tezuka and Ryouma, 4 at that time, alone to face the world. And he was there in his last desperate attempt to reach God and wished for his son's life.

So Fuji took the man's hand in his and closed his eyes.

Bad move, of course. The warmth of the hand, the tense fingers, the masculine shape, all made Fuji felt small and vulnerable in front of the man. And although he closed his eyes in pretext to pray to the Above, in his mind Fuji couldn't stop noticing the breath of Tezuka's on the air around them.

He was cursed.

Holy Father, please guide me through this temptation.


"Thank you very much, Father. You gave me a temporary accommodation. I am sorry I couldn't help but impose on you."

Fuji smiled, as always, and let the man used his room. He has moved his own stuff to the next door, where the room was even barer. There was a bed and a desk with a chair, with nice light coming in from the window with white curtain. Tezuka's suitcase was on top of the floor, and Tezuka was standing beside him.

Upon knowing that Tezuka family was in financial crisis, Fuji offered to help with accommodation. The house beside the church was almost empty since the funeral of the previous Head Priest; and now Fuji lived alone there. Fuji reasoned that Tezuka's presence brought company to him while it was also Fuji's selfish desire. For once in his life, he wanted to keep a man near to him so he could smell the nice scent of Tezuka's body.

Tezuka quitted his job to take care of his son full time; so he was quite tight financially. Stopping in the village was not inside the calculation, and Tezuka couldn't afford the sudden expenses. But luckily the surgery went well, although Ryouma hasn't wake up as yet. So till the day his precious son opened his eyes, Tezuka needed to stay in the village.

Fuji was smiling throughout the day. Everything seemed brighter and nicer. After explaining to Tezuka about the rules of the place, Fuji sat on the kitchen stool. In front of him was the stale bread; his only meal for the day. But somehow he didn't feel hungry, and instead he brought the bread to Tezuka's room.

He knocked, and waited. Tezuka opened the door with the same stoic face, but he has changed into a T-shirt and shorter pants. Fuji bit his lips for a moment, because a new feeling crept over his mind. A nice, yet sinful one, which drives his bottom part crazy. It was his first, and he didn't know what that was.

But he controlled himself, and Fuji offered the bread to Tezuka.

"Eat this, my son. I am sorry I cannot provide meat or a meal. But this should be sufficient."

Tezuka shook his head. "I cannot accept this, Father Fuji. I have imposed on you, I can handle my own meals alright."

Fuji smiled even more serene. "I said I want to help, and this is all I can do. So please accept my sincerity, Mr. Tezuka."

The stoic man accepted the bread in silence.


Two weeks passed. Ryouma hasn't gained his consciousness. And all those time, Tezuka commuted between the hospital and the church. He started to realize that the church was indeed a place of salvation. It was always calming whenever he went there. Especially when he saw Father Fuji's never ending smile. But he also noticed that there wasn't many people who came to the mass. And every morning, he saw how Father Fuji sighed while he opened the donation box. And how the small, delicate, beautiful man became thinner every week.

He couldn't help much. Tezuka was in a tight situation too. His son hasn't opened his eyes for a long time, and the hospital bill kept increasing. The stale bread provided by Father Fuji was almost like water in the middle of drought. And Father Fuji also helped him with cleaning and everything, making it easier for Tezuka to focused on taking care of his only son.

He couldn't start to explain how he felt thankful for the holy man. Father Fuji, always dressed in the same rough robe, walking slowly with a smile on his beautiful face, always greeted him with a smile when Tezuka came back. And when they were together, Father Fuji taught him about holy bible and the angels, about how miracle can happen when you keep asking for it. The faith, Father Fuji emphasized, is the most important thing to live your life with.


He couldn't believe his ears. The doctor's ridiculous conversation kept playing in his head.

"We couldn't save him. It's just a matter of time for his lung to collapse by itself. Do you want to just turn his life support off? He is in constant agony now, if you prefer to continue to wait."

Tezuka opened the heavy church door harshly. He wanted to vent his anger somewhere. He wanted to blame the God. He was praying all these time, and yet his only son was deemed to die. Where was the miracle? Where was the assurance Father Fuji always told him to believe? Where is his faith taking him to? Was it all useless? Was there no God?

"Welcome back." Fuji came out from the back of the Altar. "You are late today, Mr. Tezuka. Is everything fine…."

"WHERE?" Tezuka roared through the hall. Fuji was taken aback. "WHERE IS THE GOD YOU ALWAYS TALKING ABOUT?"

"Mr. Tezuka…"

"LIAR! I have prayed, I have faith, I believed in your words. But where? Why my son? He is only 7! He should know the world! He is my only one left! WHY! WHY? Where is the miracle you were talking about? WHERE?"

Fuji didn't know what to do. The man's anger was too great to appease. The emotional and physical strain was taking its toll on Tezuka. And Fuji didn't know what else to do.

Yet his body knew. Fuji's feet took him closer to the angry man, and his arms were opened, pulling the taller stoic four eyes man into his embrace. Tezuka was enraged, and he pushed the smaller priest away.

"DON'T COME NEAR ME! I WON'T BELIEVE ANYTHING FROM YOU ANYMORE!"

Fuji's chest pained. He was clearly rejected. His attempt to calm Tezuka down burned the man with more anger instead. His chest was so painful. And his eyes were wet.

"Mr. Tezuka…"

"LIES! Liar! That's why nobody ever come to this church anymore! Because all you give is lies!"

"Please calm…"

"What God that cannot make his own creation to worship Him? And you! You are the one with the most lie! You are left alone because nobody cared anymore! Because all of this is LIES!"

Fuji was frozen. He knew that was the truth, but it still pained him to hear it first hand.

"It maybe lies, but… my life… my life was saved because of these lies."

Tezuka frowned deeper, but he stood in his silence, letting the smaller priest to talk.

"I have been questioning those questions you asked me. Is there really a God? Because if there is, why did he make my parents abandoned me as a baby? Why don't they want me? Why did He take my only source of warmth, the Head Priest? Why he made me left alone, abandoned and responsible for this small, abandoned church? Why must I hold myself true when others fail? I am just a human, and I want to be loved too! I deserved imperfection! But… I know. Maybe this is the answer. Maybe this is…. It."

"What …What do you mean?"

Fuji looked at the man he loved serenely. "Maybe I am punished because I turned my attention away… Yes. I know now. I am born to meet you. I … I love you, Mr. Tezuka."

Tezuka paled. "That… That was plain ridiculous."

"I love you. I want you like I never do to anybody else. I want… I want to kiss you."

"Wha…" Tezuka was shocked, but he was even more surprised when the small priest took his hand and kissed him on the lips. Just in a flash, since their height difference made it hard for Fuji to keep Tezuka still. But the blue orbs of Fuji made his way into Tezuka's mind.

"I love you."

"But you are a … "

"If you want it, I will turn my back away from Holy Father."

"That's… a sin."

"I choose you over Him."

Tezuka was speechless. His anger was gone, and in its place, disgust rushed in.

He pushed Fuji away, harsh enough to make the smaller man to drop to the floor.

"Gay Priest like you should die! Disgusting! Such a disgrace! I am out of here! I don't want to accept your 'sincerity' anymore! You are a two faced bastard! Go and die!"

Tezuka closed the heavy church door behind him, harshly.

Leaving the small priest basked in despair.


A body was found in the polluted lake nearby the village. And the last priest of the church on top of the hill went missing. The church was closed.

END.