Ryan's Reviews
Episode 1: "POKÉMON IN REAL LIFE 2!" by Smosh
Hello, everyone! I'm Ryan Konerson the Lucario! And yes, I'm the same Lucario from Summer Part 1 (Attempt 1) and An Icy, Cold Christmas. In fact, a good friend of mine, Keldeo the Critic, reviewed both of these stories, and in fact, I reviewed Summer Part 1 (Attempt 1) along with him. After we came back from visiting Keldeo, Meloetta, and the other Swords of Justice for Christmas in July (too bad I didn't have a camera to take a picture of Keldeo and Meloetta kissing under the mistletoe!), I kinda started thinking of reviewing Pokémon material myself. But, when I talked to my human brother Jordan and my best friend Dragon the Charizard about my idea, we decided to review not Pokémon Fanfictions, since Kyurem and Arceus are doing that as well, but Pokémon YouTube videos, since we are soon gonna be in some Lego Pokémon videos on YouTube pretty soon. And so, I want to send a SHOUT OUT to Keldeo the Critic for inspiring me to do this.
Now, it is more than likely that these videos are gonna have bad language in them. But, as Dawn always says: No need to worry! All the bad language will either be censored or replaced with the best substitute. And they will look like this: [CENSOR/SUBSTITUTE].
Now, for my first review, I'm going review a Pokémon video made by one of the most popular channels on YouTube. Yes, I'm talking about Smosh, everybody. For those of you who don't know, Smosh is a YouTube channel made by these two guys: Anthony Padilla and Ian Hecox. And their videos are CRAZY! But I have to admit: some of their videos are pretty funny. Like this scene from "Most Violent Game Ever?!", where Ian leaves a therapy session, and the therapist (played by Anthony) is not happy that Ian is playing a violent video game:
Therapist: Okay… I didn't wanna make this a big dealio or anything, but it looks like that videogame is gonna make him super-violent. I only have one option: (therapist picks up ax from the right side of his chair) I must kill him before HE becomes violent! Ha, ha, ha! Ah, ha, ha! AH, HA, HA, HA!
(Ryan couldn't help but laugh.)
Wait, if he's gonna kill Ian to prevent him from becoming violent, wouldn't that make the therapist violent? Eh, I think that's supposed to be the joke. But I still think that scene was funny.
Now, Smosh has made a lot of other videos, and some of them are Pokémon-related. In fact, they made a short series called "POKÉMON IN REAL LIFE!" And I'm going to review ONE episode from that series, and that is gonna be episode 2.
Now, before I get into this, I would just like to clear out that this is all opinion-based.
Nostalgia Critic: But I have an online show, which automatically means that my opinion is better than yours!
(Ryan punches the footage of Nostalgia Critic aside.)
Anyways, in this series, Anthony is dressed up like Ash from the original Anime series, and he is on his journey to "catch 'em all!" So, let's begin the review on "POKÉMON IN REAL LIFE 2!" Oh, and one more thing: all footage from videos will be written in script-form.
Okay, so, as Ash, Anthony walks on the sidewalk of his neighborhood, looking forward to catching many Pokémon. Buuuuuuut, he doesn't want to really battle anyone.
Anthony (as Ash): I can't wait to discover new Pokémon. I just better make sure I don't walk in front of anyone while I—
Aaaand he does; he walks right in front of Ian, who is playing an old man.
Anthony: [Darn] it! I am not fighting anyone!
Ian (as Old man): Oh, no, no! I wanted to give you a cool new move that you could teach to your Pokémon. It's called Fly. You just teach it to any Flying Pokémon, and you can ride it to any destination.
Anthony: So you're telling me if I taught this to a TINY little bird Pokémon, I can fly on its back or something?
Ian: Anything's possible with Pokémon! Ya freakin' jack—
OKAY! And um, I'm not really sure if what Anthony suggested is really possible. I mean, wouldn't an average human being be like…too heavy for a small, basic Pokémon, like Pidove or Pidgey? I mean, it would be like the Hulk, or Thor's hammer, sitting on your chest! I'M NOT SAYING THAT THE HULK IS FAT! Absolutely not!
…
…
…
Um, let's just continue on with the review.
And so, as Anthony continues on his journey, and he suddenly encounters a Wild Mankey.
Pokedex: MANKEY. EXTREMELY QUICK TO ANGER.
Anthony: You mean "monkey"?
Pokedex: MANKEY.
Anthony: No, that's definitely a monkey.
Pokedex: MANKEY.
Anthony: Whatever! (Anthony throws his Pokedex to the ground.)
(Ryan can't help but chuckle a little bit.)
I don't know, it seems funny to me! I mean, how often has anyone actually argued with a Pokedex?
…
I'm not so sure…
So anyways, Anthony has Pikachu attack that Mankey with Quick Attack, which is a "Critical hit!" – Okay, how does that "critical hit" stuff work, anyway?
(Dragon the Charizard taps on Ryan's black-ringed shoulder and Ryan turns around to look at him.)
"I think what happens is that when a Pokémon uses a single attack multiple times, the attack builds up until it becomes powerful enough to make a critical hit."
Really? That seems like a logical theory, Dragon. But, what about when there is a critical hit when a Pokémon uses an attack once?
"Um…" (Dragon remains awkwardly silent.) "Maybe later, we can go ask Keldeo the Critic or Arceus the Critic later."
That's a good idea, Dragon. Or we could just look it up.
So, anyways, back to the review!
So, when the Mankey has taken a lot of damage from Pikachu's Quick Attack, Anthony grabs a Pokéball.
Anthony: Alright monkey!
Pokedex: MANKEY.
Anthony: SHUT THE F*** UP!
(Ryan spewed out of his mouth a sip of apple juice.)
Okay… SERIOUSLY! WHY! Why is there still cursing in this world! Why do people still do it!?
(Ryan takes FIVE deep breaths.)
Okay… Maybe I'm getting a little hateful here, and I'm partially glad that they censored the f-word so that I didn't have to do it.
But still…
So anyways, after 20 minutes, Anthony is worn out from all the Pokéball-throwing, and then a text box at the bottom of the screen says: "Wild Mankey became bored."
(Ryan chuckles.)
That's kind of a funny way to end a Wild Pokémon battle, by saying that the Pokémon is bored!
Anthony: Whatever! I didn't want you anyway!
Then don't go crying back to that MANKEY when you're in a desperate need for a FIGHTING-type Pokémon.
Yeah, for those of you who don't know, Mankey is a Fighting-Type Pokémon.
So, as Anthony continues on a journey to "catch them all"–good luck with that since there are over SIX HUNDRED Pokémon now! And I think it's gonna be merely close to EIGHT HUNDRED by the time X and Y come out! – Anthony encounters a Wild Charizard!
(Dragon comes back.)
"Wait! Did you say 'Charizard'?!"
Dragon, c'mon! You're a Charizard, now. There's nothing to get too excited over.
"Oh, you're right."
Anthony: Whoa! We're not gonna let this one get away! Quick, Pikachu, use AK-47 attack!
Pikachu: Pika?
(Ryan and Dragon just freeze in confusion)
…WHAT? What the heck is an "AK-47 attack"?
"Wait! Isn't an AK-47 a type of…"
...
A type of "what", Dragon? Spit it out.
"…Gun?"
(Anthony loads up a gun and tosses it to Pikachu.)
Pikachu: Piiiiika-chuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu! (Pikachu starts shooting Charizard.)
(Both Ryan's and Dragon's jaws just drop, as they are in shock!)
(Dragon slowly loses consciousness and then falls to the ground.)
Dragon? Are you okay?
(Dragon didn't answer, because he passed out.)
Okay. WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT! Why couldn't Pikachu just use an Electric-type attack! It would have been super-effective!
(Ryan turns to unconscious Dragon.)
No offense, Dragon.
So, apparently, that gun attack was also "super-effective", and it turns out that it didn't kill the poor Charizard.
Thank goodness!
And so, Anthony is able to finally catch Charizard.
Anthony: (Raising the Pokéball with the newly caught Charizard.) YEAH!
But then, Ian, as sorta like Anthony's…rival?...demands a rematch after the first episode of "POKÉMON IN REAL LIFE!" But Anthony doesn't want to battle him! So, he brings out his newly-caught Charizard.
Anthony: Alright, Charizard, get us the [heck] outta here! Use Fly!
(Text box at the bottom of the screen says "CHARIZARD cannot learn FLY.")
"WHAT!" (Dragon jumps back up! And Ryan freaks out by Dragon's sudden response.)
"What do you mean Charizard can't learn Fly! I can fly! It's actually on of the main reasons why I wanted to be a Charizard in the first place!"
Anthony: But…! He has WINGS! It's not like I'm trying to teach it to a freakin' monkey!
Pokedex: MANKEY.
Yeah, apparently he feels the same way you do, Dragon buddy.
"But still! Why did the writers have to do that!?"
(Ryan pats Dragon on the shoulder.)
It's okay, buddy. It's just a parody.
"Yeah… I guess you're right."
So, we come to the end of this story with…. Ian, as an old man, flying…
ON A PIDGEY'S BACK?!
Ian: WHOA! PIDGEY! **** YEAH!
Okay, again… WHY DO THEY HAVE TO CURSE AT ALL! Couldn't people just use words that AREN'T PROFANE!?
(Ryan takes FIVE MORE deep breaths.)
Okay… So, overall, I thought the video was KINDA cool, with the concept of Pokémon in real life. And the way that Smosh made it look like they were in Pokémon Red and Blue was kinda interesting, and they also mixed in some original anime elements by having Anthony dress up like Ash, and him having a Pikachu. And I've gotta admit that some of the stuff is kinda funny, like how Anthony argues with his Pokedex. But still, I don't like the profanity in these videos. But at least they censor the "f"-word, unlike others who've made Pokémon youtube videos.
(Ryan gulps.)
I'm gonna have to review them, aren't I?
So anyways, I'm gonna rate this video:
(Drum roll)
8.5/10
Well, anyways, I'm Ryan the Lucario, and this has been "Ryan's Reviews!"
Disclaimers:
This Fanfiction is a spin-off to Keldeo the Critic by Matthais123, which is a parody of the Nostalgia Critic by Doug Walker on That Guy With The Glasses.
"POKÉMON IN REAL LIFE 2!" and "Most Violent Game Ever?!" were made by Smosh, on YouTube.
Thor and the Incredible Hulk belong to Marvel Comics.
A quote from "Nostalgia Critic: Old vs. New: Lord of the Rings Animated VS. Lord of the Rings" was used in this fanfiction