Kurt's POV

The time I first had met Stephanie, I had thought she was aloof and quite frankly a spoiled brat born with a silver spoon in her mouth. It didn't take long either for her real personality to shine through. The personality that I fell for maybe just a little too hard.

When I saw her in the hallway, her face set on a determined look, as if trying not to overflow the tears that were threatening to spill from her eyes, I wanted to go past because I knew she would just tell me some smart ass remark, but something told me I needed to stop and ask anyway. So I did.

"I don't know what Hunter wants from me, I try to do everything to help me, but he always seems mad over something I do wrong." Stephanie hung her head in shame at not being able to figure out her own husband.

"From what you've told me, I think you deserve a lot better than Hunter."

Stephanie laughed bitterly, "Even if I did, who could I find that wants me? Hunter has made practically every guy in the federation hate me."

Kurt leaned in, grazing his lips with hers before stepping back.

Stephanie stumbled back, her hand covering her mouth as if to confirm he really had kissed her.

"Now you know the answer." He said.

She looked puzzled, staring at Kurt.

"Jeez, I'm sorry, I told you I wouldn't make a move on you…" Realization dawned on him as to what he had promised her.

Stephanie walked over to where Kurt was sitting, wrapping her arms around him to the small of his back as their lips met in a yearning kiss.

When she had kissed me back, it was as if magic, her lips on mine. It didn't matter to me at all that she was a McMahon, or that she held a certain power throughout the federation, all that mattered to me was her.

After I had broken the kiss, I became poignant, thinking that this was a one time deal, and that she was only using me as a rebound to forget about Hunter until she edged back to her husband.

I was wrong.

I watched as Stephanie neared my way, Triple H's arm around her. I thought she had gotten back with Triple H and that all problems were resolved, no need for me now.

But when she passed by me, she never caught my eye, though as she passed she shoved a small slip of paper into my hand. Triple H never saw the exchange, he was still talking to Stephanie, something about winning back the belt from the Rock.

As soon as they were gone, I unfolded the paper, my hands were shaking slightly as I read her handwriting.

Kurt:

Can we talk somewhere? I'll be in my locker room after the show, Hunter's going home right after RAW.

Steph

I didn't know why she had wanted to see me again, but somewhere in the back of my mind, I was hoping beyond hope that maybe, just maybe, Stephanie wanted to see me for any other reason but to talk.

I knew even if I was an olympic gold medalist, underneath the tough exterior that I put on to the world, inside, I'm just another guy, wanting a girl to love him. Being on the road was more than I ever expected to be, the fame also. Suddenly, women were surrounding me, but not for the reason I wanted them to be.

Stephanie seemed to be the only one who saw me for who I was, or she seemed to be.

I never planned to fall in love with her so fast, nor did I plan to sleep with her the only second time that we had met, it just fell into place as if pieces of a puzzle coming together.

I held her in my arms, her brown locks spread on my chest.

I was afraid of knowing the answer, but I knew I had to ask, the question was eating inside of me ever since I had met her. "S o is this it?"

Silence came as the answer. I thought she had fallen asleep, until a few moments later when she replied truthfully "I don't know."

After that, I had fallen asleep, only awaking at night when I heard a sound. It was Stephanie leaving.

"Steph?"

She tensed, turning her head, smiling weakly. "Hey Kurt, just go back to sleep."

I shook my head to get rid of the fogging drowsiness. "Where are you going?"

Stephanie sighed lightly, going back to the bed and sitting beside me, she took my hand in hers. "I have to go back to Hunter or he's going to wonder where I am."

"So in other words, I was just your playtoy and now you're bored with me, you're going to throw me away." I had to struggle to keep the sarcasm from edging into my voice.

Her eyes widened. "It's nothing like that Kurt, you don't realize what I have to give up to be with Hunter, I can't even be myself when I'm around him…with you…it's just different."

"Then why don't you be with me? I'll defend you from him, I'm not afraid of him."

"Oh Kurt," She said, touching the side of his face. "What did I ever do to deserve someone as special as you?"

"You did nothing, you were yourself." I said, confused as to what she meant.

"Kurt, even if you could defend me from Hunter, you wouldn't be able to save me from my father. Things aren't that simple. I wish it was, but it isn't."

I shook my head, "Then stay. Go if you want to return to Hunter, except don't think you can come back to me again. I don't want to be someone you are just with because you want something different."

I heard her mutter something about how she was going to regret it in the morning, but she stayed, resting her head on the crook of my shoulder, closing her eyes.

She stayed.

As the sun shined on my face, telling me that a new day had come, I awakened Stephanie who seemed to be fast asleep.

"Stephanie, wake up, it's morning." I whispered, gently nudging her.

She opened one eye, looking lazily at Kurt. "Kurt?"

"Yes?"

"KURT?" Stephanie seemed to be wide awake now, climbing out of the bed as she scrambled to get her clothes on.

"What's wrong?"

"I didn't expect to stay this long, Hunter's going to kill me, I have to go," She zipped up the last of her clothes as she headed out of the door.

The next time I saw her was when I had a match against Triple H.

"What is this JR? Stephanie's coming down to ring side!" King said excitedly as Stephanie sauntered down the ramp, looking confident as she ever did.

I glanced over in the direction of the titantron, to see what the uproar was about. My eyes momentarily locked with Stephanie's, that's when Triple H took me down, the next thing I knew I was on the ground, looking up at the lights.

Triple H, not seeing Stephanie at the edge of the ring, was glaring at me, shouting, "Get up Kurt, or are you too afraid to?"

I managed to stagger up, only to get into the position for the Pedigree. I closed my eyes, waiting for the shock of my face contacting with the mat when my arms were let go.

I crawled to a corner, lifting myself into a sitting position. I opened my eyes, to see where Triple H had gone.

I could see Triple H yelling at Stephanie now, who was just outside the ropes, I could only hear bits of their conversation. I didn't see that Stephanie had gotten up onto the ropes as I hit Triple H from behind.

Triple H knocked Stephanie off the ropes as he fell from the ring. I held my hands to my head, what had I just done?

I slid out of the ring, rounding the commentator's desk and past the ring to where Stephanie lay. The crowd roared, thinking I was probably going to hurt Stephanie, though the voices quickly turned to confusion as I knelt beside Stephanie, raising her head, quietly asking if she was all right.

When she didn't answer, I panicked, not even giving a second glance back to Triple H as I gathered Stephanie in my arms, rushing backstage.

I was near tears, thinking I had hurt her pretty badly, to make her unconscious. I took her to the paramedics, only taking a breather when they told me that she was not badly hurt, though she should stay in bed for the next couple of days.

I took her back to my locker room, although I knew I shouldn't have, that's when she started coming to. When she realized that she wasn't in Hunter's locker room, she left the room, saying to me that she'd see me later. I did see her later, with not so good news…

"I can't see you Kurt anymore." She said, looking at me dead set in the eyes, a determined look on her face.

I froze, "What?" I said hoarsly, feeling my throat constricting.

"This isn't right, what we're doing. Hunter is being faithful to me and I should do the same." She said lamely, I thought I should tell her it was, but decided not to.

"I love you." It slipped out although I didn't mean for it to.

"And I you, it's just not right, it's the wrong time, the wrong place. Can we still be friends?"

"Maybe." I replied, watching her face fall, before she turned to walk away.


That's the day I lost my heart to the one person who couldn't give hers to me.

After that, everyone could see I wasn't the person I was before. Suddenly, I was staying in my room all day, only coming out to perform in the ring to a less than good performance, only to go back to my room and repeat the same steps the very next day.

No one knew about my relationship with Stephanie, and I certainly couldn't tell anyone, I didn't want to ruin her reputation even though it would have been more her fault if I had.

A month after that incident, I met Karen from a friend of mine. I didn't want to be in any more relationships at first, but she gave me space to heal, as I slowly found myself start to fall for her, much the same way I had for Stephanie. I loved Karen, though my heart will always belong to Stephanie, even if no one knows so.

When I told Karen I loved her, I meant it. When I asked her to marry me, I wished it had been Stephanie I had been proposing my life to. I knew it was selfish to marry someone completely out of loneliness, and that Karen deserved better, but being alone scared me more than anything ever had. After a year of marriage, I felt there was still something missing, something I had to do to completely move on. So I got up early in the morning, at the rise of dawn, taking out a piece of paper and a pen as I began to write:

To Stephanie:

People really knew what they were talking about when they said your first love's always your true love.

You were my first love, and my true love.

Maybe as you had said, if it had been a different time, a different place, our relationship could have grown to something more. It wasn't the case though, because you went your way, and I had to go on in my life.

I found it hard at first, every time I close my eyes I could still see your beautiful brown eyes, sparkling at me as if I was the only one for you in the world, just to think that Triple H would wake up everyday to see those eyes almost killed me.

I only said I was doubtful about being friends, because if we could have been friends even after all this happened, I would have only been happy to be friends with you, but I was hesitant that it would work out at all. Did you ever hear about anyone being friends with someone after they had an affair with them?

It might seem cruel to say so, except I have to say this. I love Karen, don't get me wrong, it's just I can't see why but every where I look around, I always seem to find something that reminds me of you.

You probably have never had that, because I probably didn't mean that much to you, I understand. You had Hunter first, me second.

I tried loving Karen, I really did. Each day when I would lie in bed, the sun shining on my face, Karen in my arms, when I should have felt the happiest just being there, all I could think of was you.

Yours forever, never the less, Kurt

I crumpled the paper in my hand, listening to the crisp ripping sound of the paper. I knew I would never send the letter to Stephanie, it was just something I had to write.

I threw it in the garbage.

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Please R&R