Here's a short parody and crossover for Tales of Vesperia and Tales of Xillia. It's basically inspired by my experiences at the coliseum, and the amazingly cheap strategies I used when playing as Elize and Rita.
Cheap Mage Tricks at the Coliseum
Alvin, Leia, Elize, and Jude made their way to the Coliseum so that they might partake in the fights. Once they got there, there was only one conundrum that needed to be solved.
"The single advanced matches, huh. Which of us should enter?" asked Jude.
"Me and Teepo are the strongest!" Elize cheered.
Alvin gave a wry grin. "No kidding. Last time, she just used Teepo Roar to push all the tough enemies out of the ring."
"Wow. And I couldn't even make it to Ivar when I tried." Jude let out a big sigh. "I feel pathetic."
Elize put her hands on her hips. "So that's settled then! Me and Teepo will show you all again what it means to be a real champion!"
Alvin gave her a smack on the back. "Yeah, go for it."
But as Elize went to sign up and Jude, Alvin, and Leia followed her to sign the waivers as her guardians, they ran into an unexpected mage.
"Oh, wow!" Leia whispered. "Look, it's her! Rita Mordio, another big champion at the coliseum! I saw one of her matches. She just kept spamming tidal waves and bullets to wipe out all the enemies! It was so amazing!"
Rita Mordio's ears pricked up and she turned to face Leia with her head held high and a conceited grin. "Yeah, I am pretty amazing."
Alvin leaned in close to Jude and spoke in a whisper. "Tidal wave and bullets, huh? Man, all mages use cheap tricks to beat the coliseum."
Jude shrugged. "Yeah, well, could they beat it any other way?"
"It would be tough for them to beat it fair and square, I guess. But why do their tricks let them dominate?"
"But then why does Rowen have such a hard time?"
Alvin didn't have an answer for that.
"It's not just mages, you know… I saw Milla just fly up into the air and cast lightning repeatedly."
"But that's what I'm saying, man! That's a spell, so it is a mage strategy!"
"Hey, hey!" Leia said as she got in close to Rita. "We kind of look alike, don't we? We could be twins!"
Rita crossed her arms and curled her lip. "Uh, no. There's a big difference between you and me. I'm a genius mage who knows everything there is to know about blastia and magic, and you're a failure who needed help to pour mana into a gate lock. And what else? Oh, yeah, I have no problems getting up to one hundred fatal strikes and getting my title for it, but good luck getting all those trophies for your staff extensions."
Leia's eyes lit up. "Hey! How do you even know about that gate lock thing?"
"Uh-oh…" said Teepo. "Is it because I blabbed all over town?"
"You jerk, Teepo!" Leia said, fists raised and tears welling up in her eyes. "Why would you go and do something like that!"
"We're really sorry, Leia!" Elize cried out.
Rita turned scarlet when she saw Leia crying. She rubbed the back of her head and said, "I'm… sorry, too. Just forget all that stuff I said. You're not so bad. Even if your staff thing is just a mechanical gimmick, it's still pretty impressive how you get it to glow like that. And you're not a bad healer."
"So we're twins, now?" Leia said, quick to bounce back.
"Uhh…"
Fortunately, Rita was saved from answering by a voice roaring out through the reception area. "You phonies!" Ivar cried out as he charged the group.
"Don't worry! We'll handle this just like we did in the arena!" Elize said. She knocked Ivar back with a well-timed Teepo Roar, then took a few steps back and waited for him to get up. From then, she just kept on knocking him back with Teepo Roars until he was exhausted.
"Now that girl is really something else!" Rita said.
After a while, Elize started to feel bad for Ivar. He was just single-mindedly dedicated to his full frontal charge and no amount of pain would dissuade him from trying again. When the fatigue and injuries finally put him to the ground, Elize crept up to him and knelt down at his side. "Here, Ivar. Take this apple gel and you'll feel better." She handed over the red gelatinous substance.
"Hey, thanks, phony! I guess you're not too bad."
But as soon as Ivar crammed the gel into his mouth, a big guy charged straight for him, yelling, "NO ITEMS EVER!" The man unleashed an incredibly powerful attack that sent Ivar flying right out of the coliseum. After a snort, the big man strolled off, but cast his suspicious gaze over the crowd as he went, daring any of them to use an item.
"That was a pretty creative strategy!" said Rita. She strolled up to Elize. "Hey, kid! You've impressed me. Let me teach you everything I know."
"Okay. Want some gels?" Elize asked. She cast a glance to make sure the scary anti-item guy had gone before proffering an armful of gels to Rita. Rita had been secretly craving them, so she gladly accepted the gift.
Jude watched the two of them walk off together. He grinned and said, "Awww… Elize made a new friend!"
"That's awesome! I'm so glad for Elly!" Sharil suddenly showed up. "And I made a new friend, too! She's actually one of Mordio's friends who came to cheer her on." Sharil was walking arm-in-arm with Estelle. The two looked very dignified, but also wore cheery grins that spoke of eternal optimism.
"It's a pleasure to meet you all!" Estelle said.
"We were just talking, and it seems we have a lot in common. Don't we, Estelle?" said Sharil.
"Oh? Are you two twins like me and Rita?" Leia asked eagerly.
"Well, I don't know about that," Estelle said. "But we do have a lot in common."
"That's right. We're both from powerful families, we both fence, and we're both really kind-hearted!" said Sharil.
"Yes, but I'm a playable main character." Estelle raised her hand and pointed her index finger up to emphasize the point.
"Next time," Sharil said.
The two of them laughed at some hidden joke.
"She does know she's still not a playable character in Tales of Xillia 2, right?" Alvin asked.
"Alvin!" Jude exclaimed. He put his finger to his lip. "Shhh!"