Thursday . January 4, 2018

DISCLAIMINGS: I don't own Game of Thrones.

FF AUTHOR's NOTE: ..but you can say Tradit belongs to me. He's not a Game of Thrones character or a character from any other known fiction. Just a character here I made up... Anyway. That's not important. What's important is this WARNING I'm going to warn you. . I'm warning you that this fic is —- "nothing too serious" just a some'n some'n to update in 2018! It's not a crack fic exactly. Just nothing too serious. Hahah. There'll be crossovers. And hopefully many weird randomness later on. This chapter though. Eh- not really? Seems a bit rushed at first too. Oh well. It'll stay that way.

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What is Immortal Never Stays Dead

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What happens when meek freak Reek no longer is able to feel pain and finds out he is immortal?

The new maester thought it would be funny and fun to test a harmless little simple potion spell he stole from.. uh, an ex friend.

The Boltons already had a maester. But at the rate at which the Ramsey bastard - (mental, or for real, exaggerated throat clearing and exasperated air quotings done here when mentioning the word "accidentally") - accidentally flayed important people before his father could even order and forbid him not to touch them.. Was pretty fucking high. So another maester to help the old maester around was sent to Winterfell.

The new maester saw Reek badly hurt once for days and asked the other maester why Reek was never sent to be checked up by either of them. But it wasn't until a couple days after when Tradit, the newbie maester, first tried giving Reek something he liked to call a pain killer. But Reek wouldn't accept, at first thinking it was another test from his master.

"If Master did not order you to give something to Reek, then Reek deserves this pain, because it is what Master wants." Tradit remembered him say.

And it took a few months of Tradit casually asking Reek if he wanted something for the pain whenever Reek was in pain before Reek decided his Master didn't put the maester up to tricking him into getting in trouble. Reek chose to let himself be convinced the maester sincerely wanted to help him.

Reek took the pain killer.

The pain killer worked a little too well.

Reek never felt pain again ever since.

Whenever he gets punished, Reek had to try his hardest at convincing his Master he was in severe pain. He understood he had to keep up that act. Or else his Master might decide to have him killed since the Masters favorite game of inflicting the most pain on someone no longer worked for Reek.

When Reek told Maester Tradit that one day, the maester gave him another concoction Reek thought the maester jokingly called a magic potion that makes one immortal.

Reek was too afraid to see for himself if he really was immortal. Too much of a coward.

Until one day when a soldier strongly disagreed with a comment the Bolton bastard made about his man lover. Reek dove in front of an arrow that was aimed for Master's disgusting black ice heart. The arrow hit Reek's shoulder.

That was the last thing Reek knew before waking up with Master's dogs in the middle of the night.

Tradit was there early in the morning before the sun came up. Tradit explained to Reek that after that first arrow hit his shoulder, more arrows were shot. All trying to hit Ramsey. Then Bolton soldiers all of a sudden turned on each other when Ramsey gave the order to shoot at the shooters. "I may have slipped two vials of impulse decontrol potions in the food when the cooks weren't looking," the maester shrugged. "Twenty or so ate the food. Taking about three hours for the effects to start. So three hours after lunch, a hundred and thirty five soldiers and civilians, including the other maester, died during the crossfire. Two hundred and forty-six injured."

And as the only remaining maester of the Boltons left continued to tell Reek what happened, Reek found out he had accidentally been hit with more arrows since he was so close to Master. He was hit in the heart, lungs, neck, and face. After the thirteen men left alive of the twenty or something soldiers were caught and tortured for daring to shoot an arrow at Ramsey Bolton, the Master had told Maester Tradit to feed Reek's body to the hounds.

"Now you know you are immortal," excitedly whispered Tradit. "You were dead. Four arrows in all the places in you that no person would survive from. And big chunks of you were bitten off by the bitches until they were full." Sighing, Maester Tradit shook his head, raising his pointer finger and aiming it at the wide eyed Reek's face. "You actually died twice. And right after both times, you regenerated." He told Reek that the first time Reek came back to life was as soon as he removed all the arrows on him. Curious, he fed Reek's body to the dogs anyway. "And I knew you would come back again as soon as their teeth weren't tearing at you."

The maester was smiling at Reek.

"Now that I know the potions actually work, I could use them on myself and maybe make some more and demonstrate to the rich exactly how real it really works and sell it to them for two-thirds of their money. If they really want it. And they can't torture or kill me because I won't feel pain nor will I die. And certainly I would never make some for them if they so much as try."

Reek didn't like the man's smile.

Tradit laughed. "What was the saying you Ironborns like to repeat again and again?" Seeing Reek narrow his eyes made him laugh harder. "Yes. That's right. A soldier told me who you used to be-" he paused. "Wait. No, that's not right. More like who you still are. Who you really are. You can't stop being someone just because a bastard said so. Your name is not Reek. You are Theon Greyjoy. The son and heir of Balon Greyjoy- Oh, don't look so confused. I'm betting you're remembering your past more. I'd say just like how your flesh regrows and heals, your mental health is healing too. Your memories are coming back to you, are they not?"

Reek hated the guy's laugh more.

Tradit laughed again. "Ah. I remember now." He stared Theon Greyjoy in the eyes. A moment later, he brought up a fist to his chest and said to the kraken prince the Ironborn words, "What is dead may never die."

"What is dead may never die," repeated Theon. He didn't mean to. It just came out all of a sudden.

Tradit turned around to leave. But before he could go through the bar doors, his vision flashed a bright white, a split moment before a sudden searing pain exploded in and out of his head.

Bashing the maester's head in with a heavy brick was another thing Theon found himself suddenly doing. He wasn't sure what happened. He'd done it without thinking. With all the strength of his newly healed brought-back-to-life body, Theon smashed that brick down on the skull of a Knight of the Mind.

Theon dropped the brick. He took out a five inch nail he found a few days ago he'd kept in his pocket and shoved it far up the maester's nose. If no one thought to look up the maester's smelling breathing holes, they wouldn't know what else was wrong with the maester other than the hard hit he took at the back of his head.

If the maester was to be believed about the immortality thing he was talking about, then as long as something was lodged in the brain, heart, or lung or anywhere else really that would kill a person normally, then the maester wouldn't be coming back to life any time soon, if not at all. And it was just in case maybe the maester himself already tried to take the immortality potion before, the nail to the brain should keep him down. At least long enough for his body to rot in the ground until he's nothing but bones and there's no heart or brain left that his consciousness could come back to.

If someone else around knew what the maester knew, Theon hoped they would just leave the maester be. There was something about him Theon didn't like. The kraken prince would much prefer Maester Tradit's body be left there as food for the bitches.

Theon watched blood run down Tradit's nose. The blood was already leaking out even before Theon shoved the long nail up it so most likely whoever finds his body thought the bloody nose was because of the blow to his head. Theon hope the hounds would soon take a bite at the maester sometime before then so that way it's more likely the blame would fall on the dogs for the guy's bleedings.

Theon silently made his way out of Reek's old room, leaving the big dark beasts, leaving the dead body, and leaving the memory of Reek behind.

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ME!

Thank You for reading. More to come.