A/N: Hi! Yes, it's another parody of Glee. I love to parody Glee almost as much as I love the show. :) Reviews are REALLY appreciated! Even if you're flaming the story!
Choir room:
Finn: We need money, right?
Schue: Well, we inexplicably have enough that we can afford expensive sets and costumes for all our songs, but… sure.
Artie: … yet not enough so I can go on a bus to sectionals. Priorities much?
Finn: So I'll start a kissing booth to get money!
Schue: How much money for each kiss?
Finn: A dollar, why do you want to know?
Schue: *whistles* no reason… hypothetically, would it be weird if, again, hypothetically, a teacher paid for a kiss from you?
Finn: …
Rachel: And now you're just being a douche, Finn. It's obvious you just want an excuse to kiss all the girls.
Finn: Well, basically… yes.
Rachel: AND IT'S SO HOT! FINN, MAKE OUT WITH ME, OR I'LL BE FORCED TO PAY FOR IT! And that might be creepy.
Finn: …
Kissing booth:
Finn: *voiceover* I want Quinn Fabray, because this show needs more drama and love triangles. She will definitely fall in love with me if I kiss her. She just loves being forced to kiss people, after all.
*flashback*
Sam: *tries to kiss Quinn*
Quinn: YOU'RE GONNA GET ME PREGNANT! *runs away*
*end flashback*
Finn: LADIESSSSS! FOR A DOLLAR, YOU GET TO KISS ME! Ah, I'm so popular after I somehow won that football game despite being the worst quarterback ever. Plus, we didn't even dance to Single Ladies! Isn't life great?
Quinn: I'm not going to kiss you, even though I came up to your booth.
Finn: … ok then. C'mon, Quinn, don't be selfish. The Glee Club needs money. I have no ulterior motives at all.
Quinn: Can't I just donate money?
Finn: Like I told you, Quinn. Selfish.
Library:
Sam: I saw you almost kissing him.
Quinn: Well, I wasn't.
Sam: Kiss him. That'll be a surefire way to make sure you're not cheating on me.
Quinn: … so, by cheating on you, it'll prove I'm not cheating on you?
Sam: Yup.
Quinn: Makes sense.
At Dalton:
Blaine: So, I'm in love with someone, and I want to serenade him.
Kurt: IT'S ME, RIGHT? I LOVE YOU, BLAINE!
Blaine: Pfft, as if. It's this guy at the GAP who I barely know.
Kurt: …
Blaine: I guess I'm just a hopeless romantic.
Kurt: … right.
At GAP attack:
Kurt: Wow, this would be great and everything… if he was singing to me.
Blaine: I really love you, Jeremiah. Which is why I'm going to sing a song about getting you alone and possibly raping you. I guess I'm just a hopeless romantic.
Kurt: Why do I like this guy again?
Outside:
Blaine: So, did you like it? Also, here's my FRIEND Kurt. I brought him out here with me to torture him- I mean, support me.
Jeremiah: It sucked. I barely know you, and frankly it was creepy. Plus, unlike your flaming friend here, no one at the store knows I'm gay, so now I'm fired.
Kurt: HEY! I'll have you know your hair is pretty flaming too!
Blaine: Well, that sucked. I WAS SO IN LOVE! Nah, I'm over him. I guess I'm just a hopeless romantic.
Kurt: … sure.
Blaine: Yeah, but I still don't like you, Kurt.
Kurt: Dang it.
Back at kissing booth:
Rachel: *puts money down* KISS ME, FINN! ON THE LIPS, SO WE'LL FALL IN LOVE AGAIN!
Finn: *kisses cheek*
Rachel: Oh, hell no. THIS IS THE PART WHERE YOU KISS ME AND TAKE ME BACK! THE FINCHEL FANGIRLS WILL NOT BE PLEASED!
Finn: Bitch, please. But hey, how about I prolong the agony by leading you on and giving you the gift I carted around with me even though we broke up months ago?
Rachel: Screw you, Finn… oh, go ahead, I'm desperate.
Hospital:
Santana: Through Santana logic, I have discovered Quinn is cheating on Sam with Finn. I have a plan that all rides on whether any patients have mono.
Nurse: Conveniently, our new patient has mono. Go check on him.
Santana: Great, is he gross or something? Because I have to kiss him, and-
Nurse: *ignores* Just go.
Santana: *kisses and gets mono* *goes to kissing booth*
Finn: Oh, Santana, how about a kiss on the cheek-
Santana: *makes out with him* I hope I don't have… mono.
Finn: Very subtle.
Finn and Quinn cheating:
Quinn: You realize this makes you a hypocrite, right?
Finn: I'm Finn, everyone will forgive me.
Quinn: True, let's make out now!
Choir room:
Finn and Quinn: *have mono*
Other girls Finn kissed and Santana: *mysteriously don't have mono*
Santana: Obviously, you two kissed. Did you hear that, SAM?
Sam: Did you cheat on me? Nah… I'm not stupid.
Quinn and Finn: *go to hospital*
Hospital:
Rachel: *creepily visits Finn* Finn, can I please make you love me? The only storyline I can seem to have is being obsessed with you, so maybe if we get back together…
Finn: Nah, Quinn's better than you. I told you, people with names that rhyme stick together. Just look at Burt and Kurt.
Rachel: *cries* Hey, I think this calls for… A SOLO!
Halls:
Sam: I'm not stupid.
Quinn: I know.
Sam: I'm not stupid.
Quinn: Yup.
Sam: I'm not stupid.
Quinn: We established that.
Sam: I'm trying to remember what I was accusing you of, shh.
Sam: Oh, right! YOU OBVIOUSLY CHEATED ON ME WITH FINN!
Quinn: You're the one who made me kiss him…
Sam: I thought it was foolproof!
Quinn: Nah, I just saved him from choking by doing mouth to mouth without using the Heimlich maneuver. Totally plausible.
Sam: Makes sense! …I'm not stupid.
Coffee shop:
Kurt: Blaine, I know you already know this, but I love you. And I know your coffee order.
Blaine: Ha, let's just be friends. Kurt, I'm terrible at romance, despite what I said earlier.
Kurt: BUT I KNOW YOUR COFFEE ORDER!
Blaine: Yeah, and so did Jeremiah…
Kurt: So? It's me.
Blaine: Yeah, but instead of getting together now, I'd rather just lead you on for a few more episodes. Is that ok?
Fangirls: NO!
Kurt: Why not?
Blaine: Also, nothing will make me love you. Except maybe having some animal die.
Kurt: Sounds good! *drugs Pavarotti*
Coffee shop:
Tina: They forget about me even in this story?
Santana: Who are you again?
THE END.