AN:THIS IS AU and not just because Carter is alive. Everything is canon up till the last few minutes of 3x09 where she dies and then everything past that is AU ;D But you'll see what I mean soon enough. And this WAS supposed to be in Careese Themes but I kept writing and writing and writing some more and it became too long to keep it in Themes :/ I have a problem and it's called Careese-itis!

Italics is a flashback.

Disclaimer: I own nothing as usual.

John, Joss, and Fusco stayed hunkered down, they were in a firefight with some heavily armed men and women. "Who are these people?" Joss demanded softly as bullets whizzed by rapidly.

"ISA, they want Root," John said quietly.

"Why don't we just hand them Cocoa Puffs then?" Fusco griped.

John shook his head. "Can't, we can't let them gain access to the machine."

"To the what?" Fusco demanded.

"Never mind," John muttered. John had told Joss all about the machine one evening over wine after she guessed about the super computer to Finch. John only asked her to keep Fusco out of the loop to protect him and she agreed.

Shaw's voice interrupted them over the earwigs. "Reese, we are in a bit of a bind. I can't get Finch or Root to safety from here,"Shaw admitted. John glanced over to where Shaw, Finch, and Root were, seeing that they stuck in a corner with ISA agents nearly surrounding them and closing in. If he didn't cause a distraction, they'd reach Root and surely they would kill Finch and Shaw.

"I know." he muttered before looking at Carter. "Carter, give me your gun." he said urgently, without telling her anything. He couldn't. Joss wouldn't let him do what he had planned.

She furrowed her brows as she handed it to him. "Why?" she asked and he didn't answer her as he set it down on the ground before looking back at her, then to Fusco.

"Fusco, in a minute you know what I'll need you to do." He said slowly and Lionel just furrowed his brows, not understanding.

"Oh no, wonder-boy you've been hanging around Fruit Loops too much, now you're talking in riddles like her," he muttered.

John ignored him as he eyed Carter, not really wanting to say what he wanted to her with an audience, but he needed her to know, just in case, because he only had half of a clip in his Sig Sauer and whatever Carter had left in her piece. "Carter…"

"What?"

"I love you." he said and with that he grabbed her gun and stood up, moving out into the open, and drawing the fire from the ISA agents away from Finch, Root, and Shaw..

"JOHN!" Joss cried and Fusco realized now what wonder-boy meant, because he immediately grabbed her so she couldn't get up. Rapid and steady gunfire filled the air.

"RUN." John demanded hoarsely over all their comms.

"Let me go, Fusco, I have to go to him!" Joss begged as he curled an arm around her and hefted her onto his shoulder, carrying her towards the exit as Root and Shaw ran towards the same one, protecting Finch from any gunfire, firing at agents who looked away from John to them. "No, no! LET ME GO! HE NEEDS ME!" she screamed as she watched John fall to his knees as he was hit not once, not twice, but three separate times. "JOHN!" she sobbed as he laid on the ground before he disappeared from her view as Fusco slipped out of the exit with Finch, Root, and Shaw hot on their trail.

Fusco yawned as he entered the precinct. It was a gloomy Monday morning and he had a feeling Carter's mood was going to match. Though he couldn't fully fault her less than sunny disposition, not with the fact that she most likely blamed him for what happened. Although in his defense Reese would have shot him dead had he allowed anything to happen to Carter. If there was anything that mattered to the big guy it was her. But still he couldn't erase Carter's desperate screams to let her get to Reese as he carried her away from him.

Fusco pushed the double doors open to enter the bullpen and he immediately saw Carter in street clothes, with a big white box throwing things on her desk into it.

He immediately rushed over to her forgetting about his idea of getting that much needed coffee. "What's going on, Carter?" he asked as he stopped short beside her.

Carter didn't bother lifting her gaze, instead she was intently looking through drawers. "I just quit Fusco, I'm taking my twenty." she muttered flinging things into her box haphazardly, not even pausing long enough to spare him a look.

"You can't be serious, Carter."

She still didn't bother to look up. "I'm dead serious."

"But you love being a cop."

"I do, but there is something missing from my life that I love more," she said quietly. He grabbed her forearm, forcing her to stop, and acknowledge him. This had to be a gut reaction to what John said, to what had happened, to their search coming up empty handed. She wasn't thinking straight.

She finally looked up at him and Fusco felt sucker punched in the gut from the pain in her eyes. God, did he wish he could help her with it but he couldn't. "Aren't you being rash, John wouldn't want this," he said as gently as he could, but firm enough to penetrate that pain she was dealing with. Joss snatched her arm out of his grip.

"You do not get to tell me what John would or would not want me to do, Fusco."

"He wouldn't want you throwing away your career for him, that much I know. You had dreams of being this precinct's captain," Fusco tried to reason with her.

"You know what trumps my dream of being this precinct's captain?…John."

Fusco reached out, laying a hand over hers. "Look, I know this has been hard on you, especially since the big guy decided to finally tell you how he felt, but our friendly weirdos are looking for him."

She scoffed. "Like I trust them to find and bring John home, not when they are the reason he's missing. I'd rather trust the devil himself than ever trust in those three again."

"You can't possibly mean that," Fusco said, surprised at the anger Carter had for Glasses, Cocoa Puffs, and the gun happy dwarf.

"Yes I do. John was gunned down by ISA because he caused a diversion to help Finch, Root, and Shaw escape. John wouldn't have even been there had they just listened to him, he said it sounded like a trap and they fell for it. But no, why listen to John, he's just the dumb muscle, let's listen to Root because she's got that stupid computer in her head." Fusco heard the anguish pouring out of her as she spoke and with each new word her voice grew uneven and more upset. Carter sounded close to tears. "So who do the wonder three call to save their asses: John, who was busy working to save another life. Good ole' John will come and save the day for them. You and I tagged along with him to try to help and John is the one left behind, John is the one to save everyone but himself. Because everyone else ran to the door like damn cowards that they are," she snarled, cupping her hand over her mouth to strangle the sob that nearly escaped her.

Fusco quietly stood there, pressing a hand to her shoulder in silent comfort. "And I dragged you away from him," he whispered.

After a moment she dropped her hand down, looking pale, but together. "You did, but you were only doing what John wanted for me because John's a good man and wanted to protect people. Finch, Root, and Shaw….they aren't good people. They threw him to the wolves to save themselves, because to them John's life was disposable, and I will never forgive them for it." she said bitterly. "They might view John's life as irrelevant, meaningless, but John's life matters to me."

Fusco couldn't say a word in edgewise because no matter what he said she wasn't going to listen right now. She was hurtin' over the loss of the big guy and was lashing out at everyone and anyone. He watched as Carter grabbed the handles to her box, snatched it off her desk and bypassed him. He sighed as he watched her exit.

Joss glared at Shaw and Finch as they stood near her car as she approached her SUV. "What are you two doing here?" she asked quietly as she opened her trunk.

"We need to talk Carter," Shaw said immediately.

Joss didn't bother reacting as she deposited her box into the trunk and slammed it shut. "No we don't, there's nothing to say, so I suggest you both should leave," she said as she motioned for them to move away from her door.

Finch stepped forward. "Jocelyn…"

"No, Finch, you do not get to tell me how much he meant to you because I don't want to hear it," Joss said with a hitch to her breath. "Now will you please move," she requested. Finch's shoulders slumped in defeat as he stepped aside and she did not care about the guilt etched on his face. She looked to Shaw who had yet to move.

"Carter," Shaw began.

Joss eyed the smaller woman. "Get the hell out of my way, Shaw, now."

"I'll find a way to bring him home, Carter, not just for you or Finch but for me too. Reese is my partner."

"I don't believe you," Joss said simply, brushing past Shaw as finally the brunette moved away from her door so she could climb into her SUV.

She didn't spare her former friends another glance as she drove away. They couldn't find John even with the use of their all seeing friend, so she was going to have to use illegal means to find John. She had someone with power, money, and resources that owed her a favor and she was cashing it in. Joss dug her cell phone out of her pants pocket and called him.

"Hello detective, I'm surprised to hear from you." Elias murmured after a couple rings.

"You owe me a favor," she said in a way of a greeting as she sped away from the precinct.

"I owe you my life," he corrected softly. "So I owe you many favors."

"I have no choice but to cash in on those, because John's missing, and I need your help to find him."

Joss sat in Elias's underground headquarters of sorts. She knew he did a lot of his work from down here, hiding from the police, and still generally being a thorn in the side of all major criminal players in New York. Elias still had a hold on the city, even without needing to show his face. Which is why the fact that Elias had an inside man in the ISA shouldn't have surprised her so much, but yet it had. She couldn't wrap her mind around how far Elias's reach was, he had his tendrils in everything and everywhere.

"He's alright, Jocelyn, this is John we are thinking about," Elias reassured as he sipped his wine, while she impatiently tapped her foot against the floor waiting for word from Marconi.

She looked up. "I know he's alive, I'd know if he was gone. I just don't know where to look or where to turn," she admitted, looking away. She had pitched her moral compass the moment she ran out of options of finding John.

"Yes, I've been meaning to ask you since you came here seeking my help to find John. Why are you seeking my assistance and not Harold's?"

She clutched the small glass that held the much needed alcoholic beverage. She took a giant gulp of it before slamming the now empty glass on the clothed tabletop. "Because they are the reason he's missing and I don't trust them anymore," she admitted. She didn't think she could ever trust Harold or Shaw again. It would take a lot to earn it back, if they even could.

Elias smiled. "I'm touched that you trust me in their place."

"Don't get too comfortable with it, Elias. I don't trust you either or your flirty sidekick," she muttered.

He chuckled. "Of course, but you're an intelligent woman, you knew that I owed you a debt and I would help to try to clear that debt I owe. Sound strategy, Jocelyn."

She cocked a brow but didn't bother to say anything. She turned when she heard heavy footsteps and saw Marconi making his way over to them. "Please, Anthony, tell me good news," she said as she got to her feet to eye him directly.

He smiled, which looked nearly unnatural coming from him. "John's alive," Marconi announced. Joss dropped beside Elias.

"Oh thank god," she whispered, tears welling up in her eyes but this time from happiness. "Where is he?"

"He's at New York-Presbyterian Queens hospital and heavily guarded, the entire hospital had their cameras disabled. From what our guy learned,they removed three bullets from his body; two to the abdomen and one to the shoulder. None of the bullets did any significant damage but they are prepping him for surgery scheduled for tomorrow to do more surgery."

"Surgery, why?" she asked. Why was the ISA saving him when they were the ones to gun him down?

"They are going to implant a tracker in him."

Joss shook her head. "They are going to tag John, release him, and when he goes back to Finch it will lead them right to Root, Shaw and Finch. They'll take Root and kill the others." she said. John wouldn't survive if he somehow had brought danger to Finch and was responsible for that man's death. And even though she didn't like Harold or Shaw anymore she couldn't let them be in danger. "We have to get him out of there before they can tag him."

"Going to be hard, he's guarded around the clock, the only window of time we have is when they are going to transport John to the hospital where the surgery is going to take place. The hospital he's staying at all the have been booked months in advance and they want to keep what they're doing under wraps. Not even the ISA can bump anyone scheduled. They are transporting him to Lenox Hill at ten in the morning, they have an open O.R."

"Then that's when we strike." Joss said simply.

AN: This is not the original end of the oneshot. Nope, the original end to it was when Joss called Elias for help, and that's it. I was going to end it on Carter searching for John, but good news for you guys I couldn't stop writing this. There is only one more chapter though, which will be posted sometime tomorrow.

Thanks for reading! I seriously need someone to take half my muse for me so I can actually focus on one thing instead of thirty at one time because I have updates ready for The Demon Within, Careese Themes, Carter Drabbles, and Bring Me to Life!