AN: Okay, I know I haven't updated my story in a little while, I have the next 4 chapters already written. I just haven't felt up to typing it out. Yeah, I know. -lazy- I will sometime before the weekend, I promise. But for now, Well I had the idea for this oneshot.. I hope you like. Please Read&Review!~ 3
'There's no one to blame this time but yourself. You told him it was okay, hell you practically made the choice for him.' I sighed as a stared at my own reflection looking back at me. My hair was basically a nest, nothing like it's usual bouncing curls. My eyes were red and very puffy, you could tell I'd been crying.. hell I still was. You could see the fresh tears sitting on the ledge of my eyes, just waiting for a chance to escape.
Tears slowly trickled out one by one as my mind flashed back to yesterday, the day I ruined my own life and any chance at happiness just so the one I loved most in this world, the one I'd give anything for; could be happy.
"I just don't know what to do." Caleb said as he kicked at the dirt below his feet, Hanna bit down on her lip. She knew what he needed to do, as much as it hurt her. He needed to at least try to work things out with his birth mother, He owed himself that much. She put on the bravest face she had, thankful that she had used it so many times before that it seemed real. He had to believe she'd be okay, He would never go if he knew how much this would truly hurt her. "Caleb, You have to go. You know you do, This is what you always wanted right? So go. You owe it to yourself to at least try. You'll regret it if you don't." She took a deep breath as she looked over at him, making sure her brave face was in place. No cracks or flaws allowed here. "But.." He began, she simply shook her head. "No buts. You have to do this. Don't worry about me, I'll be fine." She painted a fake smile on her face and looked into his eyes, reaching out to take his hand. "And if by some off chance things don't work out.. Well, you know where I will be." She said softly, hoping her voice didn't betray her. He got up and walked over, standing in front of her and bending down slightly to kiss her. A long moment passed before they broke apart completely breathless, their foreheads touched as they looked into each others eyes. She took a deep breath, doing her best to keep up her brave front. "I love you." She whispered as she stared into his chocolate eyes, "I love you too." He stared back into her gorgeous ice blue eyes before breaking apart. A silent goodbye was exchanged as he walked away, a silent river of tears escaped her as soon as he was out of sight.
Tears escaped just as they did the day before, my breathing was ragged and I wanted nothing more than to just crawl into a hole and die. If I thought life without him last time was hard, that was a piece of cake compared to how I felt right now.
A soft knock came though my door, "I'm fine mom.." I had hoped that came out better than that. Pain was perfectly clear in my voice. I cleared my throat and tired again, "I promise, I'm fine. Just go on your date." I let out a sigh, that time was worse than before. More tears set themselves free as I heard the door open, Immediately I wiped away the tears with the sleeve of one of my old 'Hefty Hanna' sweat shirts, The one I always wore when I felt helpless and weak, just like all that time ago.
"I said just.." I turned around then, "go.." I finished just as I realized it wasn't my mother standing in the doorway. "She did go, She said I could come up.. Unless you want me to leave?" He said as he shut the door behind him as he walked in. I shook my head 'no' as I sat there. Surely my eyes looked like some strung out power puff girl. I had only slept three hours last night and all this crying does no good for your looks. He sat down on the edge of my bed, turning my chair towards him when I made no effort to do it myself.
A silent moment passed before I could mange to find my voice, "I..I thought you left yesterday.." I looked down at my hands, I didn't want him to see how much of a mess I truly was. Or how much of a effect he had on me, though surely by now he knew. "I almost did." He replied, "What stopped you?" I asked curiously, though my voice sounded so small I sounded more like a child. His cool fingers found there way under my chin, lightly lifting my face to look at him. Instantly I bit down on my lip. "You." He said simply, only going on when a look of pure confusion appeared on my face. "I should've known I couldn't leave you. I just don't have it in me to do that again. Not for anyone. Plus just look at you.." He used his thumb to clear my cheeks of tears, as a smirk appeared on his face. The one I loved so much, the one that made me fall for him in the first place. "Who knew I had this effect on you?" He asked, wonder clear on his face. 'Had he truly not known how much I cared?' I thought to myself, enjoying the feel of his hand on my skin.
I shook my head, a weak smile appeared on my face. "Don't flatter yourself." I replied as I pulled away and sat back in my chair. It almost physically hurt to separate myself from his touch. I swear sometimes it's like he has some magical spell on me. I crossed my arms and locked my eyes on his, "So.. What, you let your mom leave without you?" I asked truly curious. Though in all honesty, I just wanted to lie in his arms and forget this all even happened. "Yeah, I did." He replied a moment later, "But why? You've wanted that for so long.." I continued, "I told you already. I can't leave you again, I just can't." He reached out then, his hands finding mine and his strong arms pulled me to him.
"She's left before, Who's to say she won't again? You, Hanna Marin; are the only one I know I can count on to be there for me, you're my home. I won't lose you again, Not for anyone." He said as he stared into my eyes, I was speechless. I couldn't believe it, I knew his words were true but my mind had a hard time wrapping around that. Before I could think too much, his lips met mine and I knew instantly, He'd never even think of leaving again. With that thought, a bright smile came to my face and I wrapped my arms around his neck as I kissed him back with all I had to give.