Charles was doing fine. Much better than they had expected. Just fine.
Everyone was eager to think so. Everyone did.
Except Raven.
She managed to hide it. But when accidents happened - and they were still liable to happen in spite of Charles` unmistakable progress - her control would slip.
Like now.
The boys anxiously surrounded Charles who was busily assuring everyone that he was not hurt . Eric silently followed Raven out of the room.
She was leaning against the window struggling with herself. She did not turn around.
"Go away", she muttered.
"No. Raven, we need to talk."
She was silent.
"Raven, I know you blame me for - for what happened to Charles."
Clenching her teeth, she drew a deep breath, all the while keeping her face away.
" Should I not?"
" Raven, it was an accident. The sooner you accept it, the better it will be for everyone. Especially for Charles."
She gave a sudden, almost hysterical laugh.
" Oh, yes! For Charles!"
She shot around, her yellow eyes ablaze with fury.
"Dont you talk to me about that day! Don't talk about blame! I might have promised him I would not " she broke off, panting.
"You promised what?
"Nothing" she answered sullenly, taking a firm hold of herself, " Leave me alone"
She left.
She left.
Bit something of her animosity, of her pain, of her- anger? - lingered near Eric. Darkened. Started assuming shapes.
Accident...Raven had almost laughed when he said it. An accident - that damned sheet of iron crashing Charles - and he locked with Shaw, unable to stop it...
Accident. No one to blame...
Charles was always careful about this point. Too careful.
Suddenly a cold wave - the wave of recollection arising from nowhere, bringing back the erased past - touched his mind.
Someone told him that day, that it was he that had done it to Charles.
And - the voice was not Raven`s.
It was - Charles`.
Eric slowly opened the door and , leaning on it, stared at Charles.
" Hello" he called lightly , busily scribbling on a sheet of paper. Not getting any answer he looked up. Eric swallowed, meeting the open, frank look of his friend.
"Eric, what…
"You know", Eric answered abruptly, closing the door and taking a few steps closer to Charles.
Slowly Charles withdrew his glance. For a few seconds he stared at his papers, finally he looked at the still silent Eric.
"I am sorry".
There is bitterness in Eric's controlled voice - the pain of betrayal. Of Charles. Of himself. The pain of knowing and not knowing.
" You damned sure are. How did you do it, Charles? Did you force me to come back? Instil a brand - new set of notions in my head - all copies of your own?
Now his rage is surfacing, breaking through everything. Charles still holds his gaze- unflinchingly, wistfully.
"It was fun, Charles, was not it?" sneeres Eric. "Taming your new rat?"
" You never were that."
" No? What did you do to me, Charles?"
"I did not bring you back, " Charles ` voice is even. " You came back yourself. A month ago. Eric ", his voice takes on a deeper ring. " It was your choice. Only yours. "
Eric is breathing in gulps.
"You changed my memories, " he says in a hard, accusing way.
Charles lowers his eyes.
" I did. I - corrected them. "
"And the others` as well? All but Raven's?"
Charles nods.
Eric steps closer, leans towards him.
" Why did you do it?" he asks softly , "Because you wanted to make things easier for me - or for yourself?"
"Eric..."
"You found it hard not to blame me for this," he indicates the wheelchair and Charles gives a slight wince, " unless you pretended that you had nothing to forgive. "
" I don`t blame you".
" I do. I blame you for messing with my mind" Eric answers harshly.
" I am sorry", Charles responds. Suddenly they both seem to realize the irony of the situation - Charles asking Eric`s forgiveness the first time they both recollect the Cuba beach. Charles lips twitch in a sad smile as the thought flashes across their minds.
Eric tears his glance away and moves to the door.
"Don`t."
Eric stops.
" I must", he flings across his shoulder. " I have had this before - I will never again allow anyone to control me".
Charles rolls his wheelchair forward, placing it between Eric and the door.
"Eric, I swear to you", he says forcefully, " you are here, because you chose this way yourself. I never meddled with your decision. I" , he hesitates for a second and finishes softly " I wanted to make things easier for you, that is all. I know now I was wrong."
" You were. "
Eric moves on.
"Eric, you don`t have to do it" , Charles calls to him once more.
Placing his hand on the knob, Eric pauses.
" I can no longer trust you - or myself."
" You can learn to. I managed it. So can you. "
Eric turns around.
"By the way, I never asked your forgiveness" , he says drily.
Charles eyes seem to fade, and a tiredness settles on his face.
"I don`t want you to" he answers and for the first time there is a corresponding note of dryness in his voice.
" Some wounds cannot be healed. " Eric says heavily . " I am sorry you realize it now as well."
"No, they cannot. " Charles agrees with a quiet note of mourning. "But you will stay", he continues calmly. " And help with the school. Because this is the real you, and you know it."
"Still believing in the best...Good luck, Charles."
Eric leaves.
And stays.
This evening will be a busy one.
Eric Lensherr is trying to hold on to his new life. Probably he will succeed.
Charles Xavier is taking a resolution- after realizing another recent mistake of his.
Today Moira McTaggert will get a call.
And then she, too, will remember.