A/N: This was originally my first chapter, but then I decided to skim a bit off the top and make myself a prologue, or, as ff.net likes to call it, a "Default Chapter". It does begin darkly. I spent some time applying a bit of a sad reality to the goals of AVALANCHE's movement to justify the flow of the story. I promise the whole story won't be as depressing. Please tell me if you enjoyed it or not in you REVIEW (hinthint ) Enjoy.

Disclaimer: If I owned them, this story would not be considered "FAN" fiction. Thank you.

My Funny Valentine

By hoheehum

Prologue

As much as I dislike the idea, I have concluded I exist solely to be spoken at. A wall with ears. A wall giving every indication that it has no interest in hearing you blither. Nonetheless, complaints, curiosities, revelations -- none of them pass the opportunity of my silence. Only so long as the world is in boring, uneventful peace am left to my own devices, and have nothing to fear from those looking for a wall with ears.

But the world is far from peace.

The last of the reactors is to be shut down today, marking the beginning of a new Dark Ages for mankind. The larger part of our world is gathered around a television to see their favorite shows one last time - until some alternate energy source is found. The rest are here, milling about the reactor to witness the last moments in which humanity may harness the power of its dying planet.

Billions of people unemployed in the blink of an eye. From the maintenance crew of the reactor left with no reactor to maintain, to the movie star who can no longer make movies, to the camera crew who can no longer film them. The janitors in the TV studios will make new lives until a hopeful someone buys the building and hands out their jobs again.

There was an artist whose computer-based art will be rendered obsolete with the closing of the reactor- hundreds of thousands of works made in love and anger alike, nurtured into beauty, now never to be viewed again. He flung himself from atop the wreckage of what was once the great ShinRa building in the center of Midgar yesterday, before his world could end and leave him to wander in space. Stripped rudely of his own Purpose, what was left for him to do?

And what do you say about it?

"I'm really sorry about this. But hey- our planet's happy now! So cheer up!"

Tell the man who can't feed and clothe and house his family during those long, cold winter nights in Kalm to shake the hand of someone from AVALANCHE. See if he doesn't take the opportunity to spit in his palm first.

Or what about the little girl who does her best to keep smiling that sad smile despite the hunger in her stomach? Whose fault is that? Was it ShinRa who took away her mommy and daddy's jobs? Meteor that knocked her in one deadly blow to the bottom of the food chain? Is it Sephiroth's blade or the blade of hunger that leaves her sobbing at night with a pain in her gut?

Or is it us? You know the old Wutaise proverb: "The mistakes of the dead are the faults of the living." Everyone else to be blamed is gone now; AVALANCHE is the last man standing. Is there such as thing as "fault by default"? It sounds kinda funny, saying it aloud now, but, seriously? After all we've done for her, is the world still going to work the same old way?

A heavy sigh.

Banks and shops and office buildings and houses all over the world are being boarded up with everything from titanium to Styrofoam.

At exactly 10:00 this morning, all heating, plumbing, phone lines, life support, transportation, televisions, security systems, and means of communication will become useless. It will be the biggest blackout ever.

People from everywhere are flocking to Corel to make some money offa' coal. But Barrett called up the other day… he told me the coal there isn't going to cut it. The demand has increased drastically since the world made the move from coal to Mako, and since the supply was already thinning from before ShinRa showed up, Barrett says what we have may last us a year. If we're lucky.

And if we are not…?

Ah, hell, it's time to go. Uhm… well, sorry I'm just kinda talkin' at ya' here. Find myself doing that more and more often. Heh. I know you're not really one for words, so, uhm…sorry…

"…No need to apologize…"

Another sigh.

Heh, I'm sure people do this to you all the time.

You have no idea.

I thought as I watched him walk away that Cloud would not make a very fine politician. Too honest to feel comfortable, and too naive to hide it. And no foresight- at least not in the political sense. These "surprises" he only now saw had been on my mind since I first joined his cause.

So, saving the world fails to be as rewarding as you had expected. Get used to disappointment.

…

So… tell me whatcha think

(The review button beckons.)

Oh:

ps. It is confirmed: Our beloved Vincent IS IN Advent Children. Don't believe me?

Go to my profile and skim to the very bottom (don't bother reading it if you don't want to) it has all the info you could want right there.

Ta!