I'm Starting to cRack.
(A story on what the pressure of fame is really. In our eyes, we either see Miley as our role model, or someone we should hate. But really, it's much more complicated. She goes through way more than we think she goes through. Here's my Miley rant! XD)
*Disclaimer: I don't own anything but the plot!
I ran my hands through my waves, still not used to the fact that my hair was two times shorter than before. Sighing deeply, I picked up the pencil once again and tried putting my genious to work.
Usually a song hit me like - BAM. But now, every time I had time, my mind wandered restlessly in wild directions. I could be thinking about the latest Red Carpet I went to, and a minute later, I'd be thinking about Hannah Montana.
Great.
I put my pencil down and leaned back against my fluffy pink pillows, pulling my comforter out and snuggling under it, determined to finally think my thoughts out.
When I decided to quit Hannah, it wasn't as an easy, simple decision as I made it seem when I talked to the press about it. "I'm glad I finally got that out of my way," is what I may have said, but truth is, I just couldn't take all the hating and bacsktabbing I was getting just from being different from who I was when I first started Hannah Montana. I missed being Hannah, I miss my fans that had brought me so far. But I also miss being the girl I once was. Or at least I miss being treated like the girl I was before the peer pressure started to get to me.
The only reason people are afraid to admit they like me, Miley, not as Hannah, is because they thought Hannah Montana was a little to babyish for them. I didn't think much of it first, but it hurt knowing that I could have way more exposure if people were a bit less critical. I loved being Hannah. But I hate having to act like someone I'm not in real life because I'm Hannah in the TV shows.
Especially that one episode where Disney decided to bring the Jonas Brothers in. It was fun being with them, but it was not cool how people naturally expected me to hang out with the Jonas Brothers 24/7.
People were mad when I broke-up with Nick Jonas, and the weird thing was, it felt like some were even sadder, or more angry than I was. I loved him, for sure, but my fans and haters were taking it too far, hence the break-up. Now, I'm afraid to even go back with him, afraid of how much the pressure might increase, of how much the hate WILL increase.
It's strange how just talking to someone can ruin your life. The paparazzi, the press, the fans, the haters - they all start blabbing. Sure, I can take a few, "Oh, they're good friends!" or "Hmm, Miley just wants to talk," but when they go fanatic with gossip sites, news reports, and ugh, new couple names, even when they're dating and I'm not, it's stupid.
Stupid how just because ONE person feels like I look good with say, Shia Lebouf, they have to go ahead and say that we're dating, that "Oh!, it's SHILEY!" Yeah, I haven't even met Shia Lebouf yet.
That one time I took a single picture with Taylor Lautner because we were friends, everyone started to say we were dating. So, if I were to pose with my Mum for a pic, we'd be dating? I wish I could be a normal teenager sometimes.
People hate me because I don't like what they might like. Hey, I'm no Goddess, I don't know everything, I don't have the highest IQ, the perfect body, and I don't like everything and everybody. Just because I said I'm not a big fan of Twilight, BOOM, istant hate! From people that used to love me. And yeah, I might like Harry Potter, does it mean that people who hate Harry Potter now hate me? It's unfair, and judgemental. I seriously don't dig vampires, werewolves, and the like. They're just creepy to me.
And people always love couples, don't they? Nelena, Niley, Nelena, Niley. Nelena lovers hate me, Niley lovers hate Selena. What is up with that? And it's constant fighting back and forth about how Selena's a way better singer.
Well, news is, Selena's voice is fake. Anyone who heard her real voice knows that she changes it. So, she's a good person! It doesn't matter about all that, just because we're not best friends means that I have to hate her? And ever since Selena decided to suddenly spring up with the idea that she can sing and dance, it's been total hate for me.
Yeah, I'm starting to crack.
One word: CRAAPPPPP!
I wanted it to be lonnger, but then I got tired so I ended it early .Let's just call this practice, and I needed to work my fingers out. THREE DAYS WITHOUT TYPING. I'm about to die.
:) LOVE YOU!