Twilight and all its characters belong to Stephenie Meyer. Which is sad, I'd love to do Carlisle once in a while.

Contains smut, angst and maybe rape and self-harm. You are warned. So keep your little kiddie eyes off the screen right now if you are under appropriate age in you country.

He was mine, and I loved all of him. I loved him more than anything else in the world. More than the sun, more than Forks and more than Edward. Oh yes, definately more than Edward.

It was amazing that Alice had not seen anything yet, since I was somehow blocking her vision with my 'new ability'. I did not tell her ofcourse, it would only ruin all the fun and Edward would never look at me again if he'd ever found out.

This whole 'thing' has only been going on for a couple of days now, since that greasy bastard that goes by the name Edward Cullen was again, moments away from unleahing that everlasting lust inside of him, burning through his veins, onto me.

We would have kissed, carefully ofcourse, when he suddenly crashed back into the wall after I tried to lift his shirt off his body, whining about the fact that he will hurt me and that he would never let that happen while I was under his guard.

I don't like being guarded.

For the what seemed like a thousand time, he gathered his things and jumped out of the window in vampire-speed that wasn't notable for the regular human eye, without saying anything to me. He left me there without an answer, trying to gain a breath after kissing him so fiercly.

He'd then show up the morning after to pick me up for school, flashing that slimy smile of his, acting as if nothing happened the night before. He didn't even seemed to notice my constant arousal when I was in his presence, even though he was a bloody vampire and could only think about the smell of my blood, but no. He couldn't smell my dripping cunt.

Last night it was the occasional situation again. The kissing, me touching his bare abdomen under his size anorexia shirt with my sweaty hands, and him backing away with a crack that would have caused Jacob to stop in his tracks in the reservation.

I've had enough of it. I've had enough of this never ending protectiveness he thought I needed. I could take well care of myself, couldn't I? Apart from tripping over my own feet all the time and ending up in a hospital bed time after time.

But it didn't matter. I liked getting hurt. That would only cause me to get closer, closer to him.

The way his eyes turned to a dark pool when he examined me turned me on like nothing else. His hands would be everywhere but at appropriate places, and he would have to cover my mouth to muffle my moans. He was just too hot to be true, with his long, white labcoat swirling around him as he walk away, just after giving me the most amazing orgasm by only looking at me with his dark gaze.

At first I was certain that he wouldn't understand, that he wouldn't want to understand. That he would have just ignored my human needs and left me with a half finished orgasm just like Edward did.

Edward, his son. Oh yeah, I was totally fucking Edward's father. Well, more like a father-figure, but still. Edward was nothing compared to his father.

I loved feeling his thick and long cock sliding into my mouth, and gagging on it. I loved the way he would smack my round bum with his big hands that had centuries of experience. I loved screaming his name when he thrusts himself into my too wet and too tight pussy. I loved the way my Dad watched me limping and moaning when I walked up the stairs after he dropped me off at my place, after he rammed himself into my tiny pink asshole for several hours.

But most of all, I loved him. I loved his kindness and gentleness when he wasn't pounding his dick inside me like the wild animal he really was, deep inside. His caring, calm and peaceful personality he had carried with him for so long.

I loved the way he cheated on Esme, and I on Edward.

I was our very, very dirty little secret.

So much for a starter. You guys tell me what you think. I also need a beta, so any volunteers? My grammer isn't the best since English is not my native language, but I think I do fairly well.