Disclaimer (because it would stink to get sued on Christmas): I do not own Sonic or any related characters, although Tails is on my wish list to Santa... XD Also, credit has to go to Dr. Seuss for the storyline of 'The Grinch that Stole Christmas' which I've borrowed for this story.
Well, this has been effectively two years in the making now since I failed to finish it in time for the holidays last year, but here it is at last! As the name suggests, this is meant as a parody of the classic 'Grinch' Christmas classic, only using characters from Sonic the Hedgehog instead. Unlike a lot of my other works, though, this isn't really meant to be accurate or exactly true to either side so much as it is simply a cheerful and humorous read. I hope everyone enjoys their holiday season this year, and Merry Christmas!
The Egg that Stole Christmas
On the planet of Mobius
Creatures covered the town.
A single store that was empty
Was nowhere to be found.
Yes, Mobians hustled and bustled
And raised quite a fuss,
Because today was the last day
Before their beloved Christmas.
The shopping went on
And the day got quite merry,
Except for one person
Who felt quite contrary.
"Look at these fools
With their holiday plans!
Someday, I swear
I'll rule all of their lands!"
The angry old Egg
Sat now in his chair,
Keeping watch over the Mobians
From his mountain lair.
"Christmas is pointless!"
A humbug for sure.
"It's just another day!
There's no special allure!"
And the happiness he saw
Now playing on his screen,
Got Eggman to thinking,
"How could they be so mean?!"
"Year after year
I've had Christmas alone,
And those wretched Mobians
Have yet to throw me a bone!"
"For once I just wish
To get a present for me!"
The sad Doctor pondered
And gazed at his metal tree.
Then, Dr. Robotnik
Had a thought most evil,
"So if I don't get presents,
Then nobody will!"
Plotting and planning,
His mind did devise.
Now all he needed
Was a clever disguise.
A quick glance at his jacket
And a look in the mirror,
He said, "Why, to Saint Nick himself
I couldn't be nearer!"
Taking out his spare jacket
And sowing on some white,
He completed the outfit
That he would use tonight.
Meanwhile, two Mobians
On their way home,
Trudged through the snow
While they talked all alone.
"Think Amy will like
All the stuff that I bought her?"
"For the money you spent
She could be your daughter!"
Sonic just huffed
And gave the fox a long stare,
But Tails only laughed
As snow clung to his hair.
"So, Sonic," he spoke
With eyes all aglow,
"What'd ya get for me?
I just gotta know!"
"Sorry there, bro,
But that's still a secret.
If you're good till tomorrow,
Then I'll let you see it."
Somewhat disappointed,
But knowing the rules,
Tails silently prayed
That it was a new set of tools.
Finally reaching the house
At the bluff over a cove,
Sonic made some hot chocolate
Over their kitchen stove.
The beverage was hot
As it ran down their throat,
And it warmed their insides
Like an internal coat.
Soon Tails let out a yawn
To which Sonic then said,
"Hey, bud. After supper
It's straight off to bed!"
Annoyed at the curfew,
Young Tails now protested.
"But, Sonic!" he complained,
"I still feel well rested!"
"Don't matter, bro,"
Sonic quickly explained,
"You know Santa won't come
If you're still up when he came."
"Yeah right," mumbled Tails,
"I've heard that before.
I'm a grown up kit now!
I don't believe in Santa anymore!"
Sonic seemed stunned
As he pretended to faint,
He then pleaded with his brother,
"Please say that ya ain't!"
Tails was now puzzled,
Confused as could be.
"What difference does it make
Whether or not I believe?"
" 'Cause Santa won't come!
And he won't bring ya any gifts!"
But this just made Tails annoyed,
"I don't believe your myths!"
"Have it your way, bro,
But watch out tonight,
Santa might take away everything,
Everything in sight!"
Tails just ignored
Sonic's childish warning,
"Then I guess we'll just see
Come tomorrow morning!"
Then supper was served,
And Tails went to bed.
And all over Mobius,
Children laid down their head.
With his brother asleep
Sonic laid out the gifts,
Thinking, Maybe Tails is too old
For such silly myths.
Sparing a minute
To straighten things up,
The hedgehog let out a sigh,
And upstairs to bed, he snuck.
But, unnoticed by all
As he flew high, out of sight,
Saint Nicholas really would
Be appearing tonight.
Seeing his nemesis's house
Now down below,
"I'll get that hedgehog first,"
Eggman said, "Just for show!"
With the touch of a button
His chair quickly descended,
When, on the roof of the house,
He finally ended.
"Now, how to get in?"
Eggman had to ponder.
"The door will be locked.
The windows, too; but, I wonder…"
Seeing a chimney
Sticking up from the roof,
Eggman got an idea
And didn't wait for proof.
Quickly shoving himself down
The small opening of brick,
Eggman made progress
Before he began to stick.
"Grrrr… What a fate
For an evil genius like me!
To get stuck in the fireplace
Of my worst enemy!"
Wiggling and writhing
As best that he could,
He could feel the hole widening
As he entered the hood.
At last he fell to the bottom
And onto a wood-holding spire,
Now thanking good fortune
At least the logs weren't on fire.
Then, from the fireplace
He stepped out with a foot.
Finally wiping his clothes
To dust off the soot.
All around, Eggman saw
Decorations and treats,
Colorful lights,
And very good eats.
"Whooo ho ho hooo!
Now isn't this all so merry!
I think that I'll take
All I can carry!"
Looking once more
For the biggest item to steal,
Eggman decided the tree
Would be the most ideal.
Grabbing and tugging,
With both hands he lifted.
The actual tree, however,
Stayed rather restricted.
He grunted and yanked
To keep his tree-stealing plan,
But instead the tree fell
Right on top of Eggman!
Using his strength
To set the tree up once more,
Eggman's face was unburied
From pine needles galore.
It now once more standing
And still decorative as could be,
Eggman pondered a new way
To remove the tree.
Just then, however,
A weak voice now sounded,
"Santa?" the kit spoke,
With eyes widely rounded.
Stunned as he turned
To face the young fox spy,
Eggman wracked his mind frantically
To come up with a lie.
"Ho ho! I'm caught!
You're sharp as nails!
I always knew that someday
You'd see me, Tails!"
Tails now stepped closer,
Not believing his eyes.
His half sleepy mind
Not seeing through the disguise.
"Santa? You're real!
You really came!"
But most shocking to the fox,
"And you know my name!"
"Ho, Ho! I know the names
Of every young cub.
Now, back to bed," Eggman ordered
Further questions to snub.
But young Tails was still curious,
It could easily be seen,
As he now said to Eggman,
"Have you always been green?"
"Green?" Eggman puzzled
With an expression to match,
Till he noticed the pine needles
Almost covering his moustache.
"Umm… yes, that is true!
And it's why all others,
Say that red and green both
Are the Christmas colors!"
The sleepy Tails nodded,
The fib serving its purpose.
But the fox didn't leave,
Which made Eggman nervous.
Tails now just stared
At Eggman's modified coat,
Eyes wide in wonder
Before finally he spoke.
"I always thought Santa
Was just a bunch of lies!
But here you are now,
Right in front of my eyes!"
Eggman knew to act quickly
Before the fox caught him.
"Ah, but now that you've seen me,
We could have a problem."
"You know the rules
To my present leaving.
Children get nothing
Unless they are sleeping!"
"I'm sorry," Tails pleaded,
"I didn't know!
I only got up
Because I have to go!"
Eggman saw the opportunity
To shoo his young witness.
"Then stop talking with me
And go take care of business!"
As Tails ran to the bathroom
So himself he wouldn't wet,
Eggman couldn't help thinking,
I might get away with this yet!
Tails is too tired
To see through my ruse!
I'll finish the job
Once he starts to snooze.
The bathroom door opened
After a minute or two,
As Eggman greeted Tails,
"Now, to bed with you."
"I still have much work
To be done in this home,
But I won't leave a thing
Unless I'm left alone."
Tails just obeyed
As his sleepy head nodded.
Up the stairs quietly now
His furry feet plodded.
Eggman then waited
'Till the fox was surely under,
Before bringing his mind back
To resuming his plunder.
"If this tree is too large
For me to carry alone,
Then how will I get it
Out of the home?"
Then Eggman got an idea
For making out with his hoard,
And reached into his pocket
Where his devices were stored.
He pulled out a pistol,
A laser gun of sorts,
And aimed at the tree,
Firing a bright beam of quartz.
The Christmas tree was engulfed
By the bright beam of light,
Until it magically vanished
Right out of sight.
Eggman sneered widely,
Happy as could be,
As the laser told him the pine
Was stored in its memory.
Wasting no time,
And with a shocking amount of joy,
Eggman then zapped the presents,
Stealing Tails' new toy.
The stockings and wreath
Got blasted away, too.
Along with every decoration
Involving Christmas he knew.
Then, he went to the kitchen,
And there he did steal,
The chili and hot dogs
For the two's Christmas meal.
Last, he spotted some mint candy
And emptied the whole bowl,
Now replacing the sweets
With a large lump of coal.
"My work here is done!"
Eggman said with much glee.
"This is what they both get
For never giving anything to me!"
Forgoing the chimney
And simply leaving through the door,
Eggman summoned his chair
And took off once more.
"For Sonic and Tails now
Christmas is lost,
But all the other Mobians
Must still pay the cost!"
Into town he flew
And took all the lights.
He even melted the snow
To stop fun snowball fights.
To Amy's he visited
And zapped all her new clothes,
Leaving nary a thread
For poor Amy Rose.
He stole the jewelry from Rouge,
And all her other nice things.
The Master Emerald from Knuckles,
Along with all the Zones' rings.
Vanilla and Cream's house
Was next on the list,
And Eggman raided their pantry
Along with all of Cream's gifts.
The Chaotix came after,
All three sound asleep,
As Eggman helped himself
To all he could keep.
Charmy's candy was stolen.
None of Espio's shuriken remain.
And right off the croc's own body
Eggman took Vector's gold chain.
Even Big he remembered,
And, though his feet got quite soggy,
Eggman trudged through the marsh
And took his best friend, Froggy.
Shadow, it seems,
Got the best deal,
Since, search all he might,
Eggman found very little to steal.
Now content he had stolen
From every Mobian out there,
Eggman finally returned
To his evil lair.
"Now to wait for the morning
When all those fools awaken,
Just to figure out
That Christmas has been taken!"
He let out an evil laugh,
And never once he paused,
Feeling very joyful
For the chaos he'd caused.
Morning came early to Mobius.
It was Christmas day at last.
And all over the planet
Children were getting up fast.
Sonic also got up now
After hearing strange wails,
And dashed down the stairs
To meet a sad, crying Tails.
"It's all my fault, Sonic!
You told me I'd pay!
Santa did come last night,
And he took everything away!"
Sonic was stunned
As he surveyed the room,
That now, without decorations,
Seemed to show only gloom.
"Look, bro," he said,
Seeing the young fox's pain,
"Santa doesn't really exist!
I was just yankin' your chain!"
"But last night," Tails cried,
"I saw him when he came!
He was big and old,
And he even knew my name!"
"Hold up there, bro!
You saw Santa last night?!"
Sonic shouted out dumbfounded,
Knowing something wasn't right.
Tails nodded his head,
Still crying periodic,
While Sonic thought to himself,
This stinks like Robotnik!
Patting Tails on the shoulder,
Further tears to check,
Sonic promised the fox,
"I'll be back in a sec!"
Immediately, Sonic
Then dashed out the door,
Heading straight for Eggman's base,
Having been there before.
On the way, he met countless
Other victims of larson,
Proving the phony Santa
Hadn't missed a single person.
He then broke through the fortress
With relative ease,
Letting himself in
Without so much as a 'please?'
"OK now, Eggman!
Where did you go?
You've done bad things before,
But this is a new low!"
"And how did you know it was me?"
Eggman answered with a grin.
"Christmas is cancelled now, Sonic!
Face it! This time I win!"
"Year after year
You had Christmas without me!
Well let's see you have it now
Without nary a pine tree!"
Yet Sonic just groaned
With the ease of his task.
"If ya wanted to so badly,
Why didn't ya just ask?"
But Eggman took a deaf ear
To Sonic's good plea.
"And you would invite
Your worst enemy?"
"You all would hate me,
Or set a trap all along!"
Sonic shook his head and spoke,
"But that's where you're wrong."
"It doesn't matter what reason
You celebrate Christmas here.
It's just that special time
That draws everyone near."
"And it doesn't take presents
Or decorations above.
'Cause Christmas is the time
To be with the ones you love."
Now Eggman was stunned
To say the very least,
And he felt like a monster
For stealing everyone's feast.
What have I done?!
Eggman quickly thought.
Christmas was supposed to be presents,
But now I'm told that it's not!
The doctor's face sagged
As he let out a sigh.
"Then take all your stuff back
Before you say goodbye."
Sonic took the full laser
And was about to yell 'See ya!'
When the hedgehog suddenly turned
Saying, "I've got a better idea…"
Into Eggman's giant base
All the Mobians came,
To share a Christmas together
That would never be the same.
The dinner was grand
Filled by all creatures hairy.
And the returned decorations
Made it even more merry.
Eggman himself presided
As the holiday host,
And many commented
He looked jollier than most.
He apologized to Tails
For making him feel like a fool,
And personally presented the fox
A brand new, shiny tool.
To Amy, some perfume.
To Rouge, a large broach.
For Knuckles, a siren
To warn when intruders approach.
Cream got a new game.
The Chaotix received some cash.
Everyone had a gift from Robotnik
At his Christmas bash.
And to thank Sonic
For his holiday herald,
Eggman even turned over
The green chaos emerald.
Yes, all the Mobians got back
What was stolen before,
And every single one of them
He also gave something more.
And everyone feasted
Until their bellies were swollen.
It was the best holiday ever
The year Christmas was stolen.