The Battle of Actium

by Cynical Classicist

Sequel to Weapons of the Daleks and 3rd in a series. Kafyip, after reading the Aeneid, wants to see the battle described, the Battle of Actium, where Octavian's naval forces defeated those of Marc Antony and Cleopatra. However when they get there they discover sinister forces are also present, hoping to change events...

The Doctor and Kafyip sat in the TARDIS Library. Kafyip was reading Book 6 of the Aeneid again. "It was certainly interesting meeting Virgil" said Kafyip. "The planet Earth produced some marvellous poets. This stoicism is similar to the main ideas of my race." "Yes, well whatever's fine for you" the Doctor said. He was reading a paperback edition of Karkus comics and gave a smile as the Karkus blasted apart a Cyberman. Kafyip read again about the Battle of Actium in Book 8, where Augustus's naval fleet had defeated those of Egypt and Mark Antony, as was described on the shield of Aeneas. "In the middle were the bronze-armoured fleets at the battle of Actium. There before your eyes the battle was drawn up with the whole of the headland of the headland of Leucas seething and all the waves gleaming with gold.' He was interested in the depiction of the battle. "Doctor I have an idea for our next trip" said Kafyip. "Good, where shall we go this time?" asked the Doctor happily. "I would like to see the Battle of Actium" said Kafyip. The Doctor looked uneasy. "Events in history aren't always as they seem. When I visited the American Revolution I found it really wasn't like the Americans portrayed it…" "But surely it can't do any harm to see the battle? I won't interfere, just watch. Why would I want to interfere?" said Kafyip. "Alright. It's been some time since I went to Greece." said the Doctor. "But we were just in Greece" said Kafyip. "We will be in Greece when we get to Actium" said the Doctor. He danced down the stairs and activated the lift, which jammed after a few metres. After a bit of work with the sonic screwdriver it moved down steadily, though the Doctor jumped the last 2 metres. "Should you really keep jumping like this?" asked Kafyip. "Why not?" said the Doctor happily. "I'm younger then I've been for most of my lives." He set the course and the TARDIS shot of through the vortex, like a leaf in a hurricane.

Close to where the TARDIS had been set to land were two other time travellers. One was a short man with a grim face, dressed as a Centurion and holding a covered water-tank. The other was clothed in black, with the face of a demon. "You understand what you must do Erin Gond?" said the demon-faced one. "Yes. The course of this Battle will be changed. Chaos will continue for years on Earth" said Erin. "Remember I saved you from death" said the Trickster. "If you ever defy me I can return you." "I understand" said the Gond with unease. "Then go! Change the course of history!" said the Trickster, vanishing like smoke. Erin turned and began to walk towards the nearby camp.

There was a grinding sound and the TARDIS appeared close to a cliff. "Knew I should have turned the brakes of" said the Doctor. "Isn't that sound standard for a TARDIS?" said Kafyip. The Doctor seemed slightly embarrassed but quickly shook it off. "Never lie to a mind-reader! But we're here now. I've been to Greece so many times. I need a hat!" He ran off, nearly tripping over the steps, and got into his hat room. About 2 minutes later Kafyip came in to find the Doctor trying on a feathery hat. "Why…" began Kafyip. "We're in no hurry" said the Doctor. "It reminded me of a hat in Merlin." He tried on a stovepipe hat, then a fez. "This should work well in Egypt" he said happily. "But we're in Greece" said Kafyip. "But there were Egyptians at Actium" said the Doctor. He ran out of the hat room, opened the TARDIS doors, and ran out.

Erin neared the Camp of Antony. He encountered a pair of soldiers. "Who are you?" asked one. "Centurion Erinus Gondius" said Erin Gond. "I have come with a message for Antony." "What is in that case?" asked the other legionnaire. "Something to show our commander" said Erin. He put on reflective glasses and opened the case of water. From the case rose a strange fish, green with wing-like fins. It had a large eye at the front. The men stopped moving and stood looking at the fish as it hovered before them. Erin smiled. "A Hypno-fish" he said. "Looking at that eye removes your will. Your mind is empty of ideas. I will place ideas there." The soldiers continued to stare blankly. "You" he pointed at one of the soldiers "will tell me where Antonius is." The soldier gave directions. "Now you will forget everything that has happened when I am no longer here. Knock him out" he said to the other soldiers, who knocked the soldier out. Erin smiled. "Now step towards me." The soldiers stepped forward and received a blow from the flat of Erin's sword, stunning him. The Gond put the Hypno-Fish back in the tank and walked along happily to prepare his plan.

The Doctor walked along followed by Kafyip. "We arrived early. Actium is tomorrow. Perhaps there will be time for a swim. Or just a quick dip." Kafyip looked uneasily at the water. "It looks a bit stormy Doctor." "Oh very well" grumbled the Doctor. "He stopped suddenly and spun around. "Time may be in flux but don't try to interfere. Octavian beating Antony and becoming Emperor is a fixed point." "Like I said before I don't want to interfere" said Kafyip. "I know how important this battle was." The Doctor looked around and saw the 2 guards. "Look! People knocked out!" he said, bounding towards them. "You know what this means? There's something going on! This should be exciting." "On the other hand it could just be that these Guards are lazy" said Kafyip. "Yes. But we might as well investigate" said the Doctor.

Mark Antony was sitting in his tent worried. Tomorrow he would have to fight Octavian. There was the possibility of simply sending his troops away but that would put Octavian at an advantage, he would look weak. Many ships were undermanned due to sickness. Antony didn't have high hopes for the battle. Suddenly a legionary entered. "What do you want?" said Antony. "A centurion Erinus Gondius to see you" said the Legionary. "I know of nobody with that name" said Antony. "But I will see him." He walked out of the tent and met the Centurion. "Gondius?" he said. "I have an important message for you Antonius" said Gondius. "Come around here. There could be spies." "How do I know I can trust you?" said Antony suspiciously. "You might as well attempt it. I swear I am not acting against my Gods" said Gondius. Antony followed him towards a small body of water. Gondius was faster than Antony and was at the shore before him. Antony saw he was wearing something on his eyes. "What are those?" said Antony. Gondius stood aside, revealing the Hypno-Fish. The Roman General stopped in his tracks, merely looking at the eye. "Well-trained isn't it?" said Gondius. "Now here are my orders…"

The Doctor and Kafyip neared the tent of Antony when they were stopped by a brutal looking Decurion with a scar on his jaw. "Where would you be going?" he snarled. He was shorter then both of them, but he had his hand on a sword. "Hello. I'm the Doctor" said the Doctor. "This is Kafyip." "I didn't ask for names" growled the Decurion. "Where are you going? How did you get past the guards?" "They weren't awake" said Kafyip. The Decurion looked angry. "They'll be spending a day inside for this. But you'll be joining them if you can't give an explanation. Try running and you'll be up before Minos." "The Judge of the Dead?" said Kafyip. The Decurion looked at him oddly. "Yes" he said. "So are you working for Octavian? Are you bringing a message from Cleopatra? Or are you just thieves?"

Kafyip heard the thoughts of the Decurion and found the best option. "We are here from Cleopatra" he said. "Good old Cleopatra" said the Doctor. "We have got to deliver a really important message. Can't tell you what it is or I'd been thrown to the lions." "Those Egyptians…" muttered the Decurion. "Odd customs…How do I know I can trust you?" "The password is Julius and Ptolemy" said Kafyip. The Decurion pointed out Antony's tent for them. As they walked towards it, not wanting to go against their story, Kafyip turned to the Doctor. "You tell me not to interfere and yet you're happy to do so." "I'm not going to get put on trial" said the Doctor. "I know not to interfere with the important events. We have just got caught up in this. Anyway I've never met Antony before. But I met Cleopatra centuries ago. And I learnt some useful sword-skills there." Kafyip looked at him strangely before realising what he meant. "She wasn't as beautiful as they say. And her family…" "STOP!" said Kafyip, so loudly the nearest guards all looked at them. "I heard too much of those thoughts." At the tent another soldier stopped them. "We just want to see Antony!' said the Doctor. "Antonius isn't here, he's having a meeting" said the soldier. "Where exactly?" asked Kafyip. "I can't…" "That's all we need to know" said Kafyip, walking away followed by the Doctor.

"…and you won't remember that this happened" said Erin to the hypnotized Antony. The General continued to stare blankly ahead. "Now remember your orders." He whistled and the Hypno-Fish returned to the water. Mark Antony shook himself. "Well, thanks for that message" he said. "I'll return to camp." He turned, encountering the Doctor and Kafyip. "Hello" said the Doctor. "Where are you going?" "To give the order to withdraw" said Antony. The Doctor looked worried. "You can't give that order." "Who says I can't?" said Antony. "We can't hope to fight that upstart great-nephew of Julius. It will be far better to retreat. We can beat him later. I'm better on land anyway." The Doctor and Kafyip looked at each other, feeling great worry. Kafyip whispered to the Doctor. "Should I check out this Centurion? Maybe he's done something." The Doctor considered. He would probably be better at delaying Antony. "Alright" he said. "But if you have worries send a message to my psychic paper." He gave another piece. This should help send thoughts he thought to Kafyip. But be careful. It's the only spare I have. He straightened his bow tie and walked towards Antony.

Kafyip walked up to the Centurion. "What did you say to Antony?" he said. "I merely gave him some advice" said Erin. Kafyip tried reading his mind but for some reason it was more difficult. He couldn't quite get for but he got the impression something was being hidden.

The Doctor walked over to Antony. "Hello there!" he said loudly. "I can't talk to you right now" snarled Antony. "I need to give my orders." "Really? Just now? There's plenty of time to have wine, jam…" "What spirit has entered you?" said Antony. "What part of the world are you from?" "I'm not of this world" said the Doctor. "I am from Gallifrey in the Constellation of Kasterborous." "Have you been worshipping Bacchus?" asked Antony. "Not today. The last time I did so will be in 12 years" time. And I had an excellent bean stew, and there was chicken, and…" Antony was walking away hastily. The Doctor tried to think of something to do. He took a leap at Antony and threw a smoke bomb which he somehow had. The General coughed. "What foul magic is this?" he asked. He advanced on the Doctor menacingly. "Guards!" he cried. Four legionaries ran over. "Beat this man and throw him out of the camp!" said Antony. The men ran at the Doctor who activated his sonic screwdriver. The man jumped back. "A magic staff. What if he is a God?" said one of the Legionaries. The Doctor moved back warily. "Seize him!" said Antony, but the Guards weren't sure whether they were more afraid of their commander or an apparent God.

Kafyip continued to try breaking into the mind of Erin, who pulled his sword out. "What are you doing?" he said. "You are trying something with my mind. You are not of this world." "I suspect you aren't either" said Kafyip. The centurion smiled. "Correct. I am one of the Gonds. I came back with a group that want to watch Actium. But I shall prevent Octavian winning a victory here." Kafyip moved away quickly and thinking desperately seized the paper, hoping the Doctor would look at it soon. There was a slash from the sword and the psychic paper was knocked from his hand. The Centurion looked at the paper, a surprised look appearing. Kafyip seized his chance to run. He heard a whistle and turned back. Erin stood outside and Kafyip saw a huge eye filling his sight. All there seemed to be was the eye. He was unable to do anything but stare at the eye.

The Doctor felt a message. He looked at the psychic paper and saw the words "Come quickly. The Centurion is a time traveller." The Doctor ran back to Kafyip. Antony gave an order and the soldiers followed the Doctor at a respectable distance.

Erin looked at the paralyzed Kafyip. Soon the Doctor would be here. The Trickster had told him of the Doctor, someone he had often wanted to destroy. Perhaps I could get the TARDIS thought the Centurion. He opened the tank and whistled for the Hypno-Fish to come in as the Doctor came round the corner, followed by guards. "A Centurion in shades" said the Doctor. "That looks oddly cool." The Centurion flicked of his shades. "I am Erin Gond" he said. "I have been looking forward to meeting you Doctor." The Guards moved forward. "Sir, our General ordered that this man be thrown out…" "Not now!" snarled Erin. He thought of hypnotising them all. But it would look odd if someone came round, and the less people involved the better. He didn't want his plan found out. "You 2 go over there" he said. "And don't let anybody else come here. Don't let the Doctor or the tall one past." The Soldiers advanced on Kafyip, who grudgingly moved away, followed by 2. "Sent them off to get the tea?" said the Doctor. "Many would think of you as a fool with that facade" said the Centurion. "But I know who you really are. The one who defeated Morbius, the Black Guardian, the Mara, the War-Feeder…" "Who was that last one?" said the Doctor. The Centurion looked gleeful. "Your death now will mean you won't beat it. The Trickster will be delighted."

The soldiers looked at one another and began to shuffle away, feeling uneasy about both these figures. "Come back and look at the box" said the Centurion, putting on his reflective glasses. "What is…?" "Never have you minded. Come here now or I will report this disobedience to Antony." The soldiers moved forward and Erin whistled as he opened the tank. The soldiers looked forward eagerly to see what was in the box, but ceased their movements when the Hypno-Fish rose out. The Doctor himself was also paralyzed by looking at the eye, though Kafyip looked away. "When the Hypno-Fish is back in the box you legionaries will go and tell the other 2 Legionaries they are to come here when I call them. You will take their place guarding the way here. When Marcus Antonius gives his orders to you in the morning you will forget all that has happened tonight, except that Antonius told you to throw a thief out of the camp." He turned to the Doctor. "Take out any reflective glasses you have." The Doctor took out a pair which the Centurion stamped on. As the Hypno-Fish returned to the box the soldiers began to walk away.

"What was that creature Doctor?" asked Kafyip. "It's quite an interesting creature" said the Doctor. "It is a Hypno-Fish from the swamps of a world on the edge of the Galaxy. It hypnotizes its prey to catch them. But you can withstand the effects if you are wearing reflective glasses." "Which you don't have any off" said Erin. "I expect a new pair from you" said the Doctor, moving up to Erin. "But of course you need your glasses." The Gond put his hand in his pocket. "Give them back Doctor" he said. He felt the Doctor's hand put something in his pocket, and felt inside, feeling the glasses.

"Who is this Trickster?" asked Kafyip, walking over. "A Monster" said the Doctor. "Someone who wants to spread chaos. He tries changing history to do so. I'm guessing he saved you from death." "That's right" said Erin. "I was trapped inside a volcano. Then the Trickster appeared to me and offered to show me the way out, if I agreed to serve him. He sent me back to Actium as I could blend in due to my human appearance." Kafyip looked curious. "You said you came back with a group…" "That's right. Thousands of this world's years later there are still many who like Augustus. They went to watch the battle. But they will be the means by which Augustus is prevented." "So Antony will win Actium?" said the Doctor. "No. His fleet is not strong enough. He will retreat to fight another day. The Trickster's Brigade will continue to manipulate events, spreading chaos through the world. There will be no Augustus. The civil wars will continue for years more." "But you can't" said the Doctor. "You're destabilising such important events. You don't know what the consequences will be." "What care I what happens to this world?" said Erin. "I am acting on the orders of the Trickster." "You could end your pact with the Trickster" said the Doctor. "Why?" said the Gond. "The main thing is I survive."

"So you summon the Hypno-Fish by whistling?" said the Doctor. Erin drew the bolt across the tank and placed it on the ground. "Yes" he said. The Doctor looked at Kafyip and thought something. Kafyip nodded in agreement. The Gond knew something was about to happen. "GUARDS!" he cried, but as he did so several events happened in quick succession. Kafyip began running forward. The Doctor pulled out his sonic screwdriver and sent the bolt back. As he did so he launched himself at the Gond, who instinctually jumped back, falling over. Kafyip threw open the lid, turning back as he did so, and the Doctor whistled. The Gond closed his eyes, pulled out the glasses and put them on, while the Doctor did the same thing. Erin opened his eyes and saw a huge and powerful eye. "Clever little plan of mine" said the Doctor. "I had a non-reflective pair of glasses with me. When Erin ordered me to return his reflective glasses I put the non-reflective glasses into his pocket." "That was clever… The Guards!" cried the Swukain, as the Guards ran towards them, their view of the Hypno-Fish obscured by the Gond. "We're here Centurion…" said one of the Legionaries, stopping as he moved into view of the hypnotic eye. "What…" The other Legionary began to speak but also moved into view of the eye. They both stood there, like statues.

The Doctor walked forward happily. "Now here are your orders." There was an edge of smugness in his voice. "You Guards will forget the event with this fish and the Gond Centurion. But don't cause me any trouble again." "What about Erin Gond?" said Kafyip. "Oh yes. Centurion Gond" said the Doctor. He pulled some rope out his pocket and tied the Gond up. "Why do you have rope?" asked Kafyip. "I was about to go to the Triton lasso-throwing contest but never got round to it" said the Doctor. "I must go there after this. There is also a great Jammy Dodger and coffee shop… I'm rambling." He turned to the Romans. "Don't object to what I do to the Centurion. Just go back with the other Guards. And don't come back here." "Can't you tell Erin not to change history?" said Kafyip. "The power of the Hypno-Fish is limited" said the Doctor. "It can't make someone do something they really don't want to do." He whistled and the fish returned to the tank. The soldiers turned and walked away. Erin looked furious. "I will kill you for this Doctor." "Better have tried and failed" said the Doctor. "Now I think I should go and tell Marcus Antonius to change his mind." He and Kafyip walked away, the Gond spitting at them.

They soon got to Antony's tent again, having hypnotized their way past other guards, making sure to tell them not to go round the pass. They entered the tent, where Antony was speaking to several Captains. "So you see we must retreat" he said. The Doctor whistled and the men turned to look at him, catching the hypnotic power of the Hypno-Fish. "OK Marc me old mate, here's what you should do…" said the Doctor.

"Now all we have to do is travel a few hours forward, watch Actium, and have a Jammy Dodger" said the Doctor as he walked away from the camp with Kafyip. "For once all seems to be going well." "On my world is a saying" said Kafyip. "Life is balanced, the good and ill." "That's a bit pessimistic" said the Doctor. "I think that for once…" A dripping wet figure brandishing a sword moved towards them. "Maybe you are right" said the Doctor. Kafyip slapped his head. "He had a sword with him." "Oh. I suppose you did make a mistake" said the Doctor. "Even I can make them." "YOU WILL DIE HERE DOCTOR!" cried the Gond, slicing his sword through the air. "He swum to us to avoid the Guards" said Kafyip. "What else would he have swum through? The air?" said the Doctor, giving a great bound as the Gond sent a particularly vicious stab towards him. "I know how many fear you" said Erin. "But I think one good stab will end you." Despite being unused to Earth's heavier gravity, Kafyip ran towards the TARDIS with great speed. The Gond continued to move towards the Doctor. The Gond glared at the Doctor, a crazed look in his eye. "DIE!" he screeched. The Doctor ducked under his swing and knocked him over, disarming him in the process. He ran towards the cliff and threw the sword into the sea. As they struggled on the ground the Doctor turned Erin over, accidently striking his head against a stone. The Doctor seized his opportunity as Erin lay stunned and ran back towards the TARDIS, snapping his fingers to open the door, and closing it while Erin was just getting up.

The Gond looked at the TARDIS in fury. What could he do now? The Doctor had taken the Hypno-Fish and he was left here. Suddenly a black robed figure appeared before him. Erin staggered back in horror. "You have failed me" said the Trickster. "No! No!" cried Erin, continuing to move back. "The Doctor did it. I tried to…" "You should have immediately killed him" said the Trickster. "Give me another chance. I will not… ARRRGGGHHHH!" screamed the Gond as he fell from the cliff towards the stormy waters and dagger-like rocks. There was a hideous crunch, agonised crying, then a splash. The Trickster looked at the TARDIS and faded away as it did.

The Doctor and Kafyip watched the battle while eating jammy dodgers. They watched as Cleopatra, then Antony, left the battle. Kafyip was slightly disappointed. "Octavian was smaller than I expected. And this battle doesn't look so dramatic. No Apollo and Neptune and Anubis. And no Apollo drawing his bow." "History exaggerates. On my world there was someone called Rassilon. Good in history, not so good in reality" said the Doctor. They watched as Antony's ship left the battle. "So you were saying about Triton lassoing?" said Kafyip. "Let's go!" said the Doctor, jumping into the TARDIS with Kafyip following, still munching the Jammy dodger. The doors closed and the wheezing sound began again as the TARDIS dematerialised.

On a hilltop a pale figure wearing black watched the Battle. He smiled. In a year the last major rival to the power of Octavian would be dead by their own hand. Octavian would become the first Emperor, creating a time of peace for Rome. And at his death he would become a God, like his "Father". But like Jupiter surpassed Saturn he would surpass Julius Caesar. One day, thought the figure, I will bring about such a system. Then worlds will be at peace. The figure turned and went back to whence he came.