Flick coattail left. Wait for target to look right. Creep left. Stop behind gravestone. Slowly unbend knees and…
A satisfying screech rent the air. Or, rather, it would have been satisfying if it weren't Sally screaming. Jack turned to the old ghoul who was currently serving as his mentor with a smug grin.
"Very good," the old ghoul said. He crossed his beetle-like arms over his rounded belly. "A very well executed misdirection. Of course, it would have been better if you'd waited until your target." He gestured to Sally, who was sitting in the middle of a circle of gravestones. "Thought she was safe."
Jack narrowed his eyes at the ghoul. "With all due respect," he said, stepping out from behind the gravestone. "Waiting longer would have taken away the suspense. I appeared at the height of the victim's tension."
Sally opened her mouth to agree with him, only to be silenced by a look from the old ghoul.
"You did," the old ghoul agreed. "But that wasn't the right time."
"It was the perfect time!" Jack exclaimed, clenching a bony fist.
The old ghoul stared at the angry skeleton in front of him with a blank gaze. "I don't have time to argue the finer points of terror with you, young bones," he said lazily. He glanced at the timepiece he habitually kept in the breast pocket of his ragged suit and yawned. "Now if you'll kindly remove yourself from the graveyard, I have another pupil to instruct."
Jack glared at him and looked like he might very well tear the ghoul to pieces. Then he gave a little huff of anger, crossed his arms over his ribs, and stalked out of the graveyard.
Sally looked at the ghoul, who was falling asleep in the torn up armchair he always hauled out to the graveyard for lessons, and quickly got to her feet. "Jack!" she shouted at the skeleton's retreating back. "Wait!"
Jack blinked and turned to face her. "Sally," he said, all of the anger gone from his voice and replaced with confusion. "Aren't you supposed to be the target for the next student?"
Sally curled one side of her mouth in a grotesque of a bemused grin. "Hyde's next and he never gets past basic movement," she replied. "I won't be needed for awhile." She paused for a moment before pulling a little box out of her dress pocket. "Here," she said, holding it out to him.
He gingerly took the box from her then pulled at the orange thread binding it together. Inside was a perfectly cleaned fish skeleton. A huge grin spread across his face.
"I know bone fish is your favorite," she said shyly, looking at the ground. "And you always forget to eat."
"Thank you, Sally," he said, already breaking off a piece of the spine and tucking it into his jaw.
She glanced up at him and decided it was time to broach the subject. "Look, about Mr. Stoker…"
Jack's look of joy instantly turned to one of anger again. "That miserable bump," he growled after swallowing a bit of fish bone. "He doesn't understand the first thing about scaring people."
"Yes, but he is the head ghoul," she said. "And you've gone through three mentors already! Maybe if you just…"
"Just what?" Jack asked.
"Just played along," she blurted out. "Did what they said and then practiced real fright on the side."
Jack's usual grin turned into a thin line of bone. "You too, Sally?" he asked, sounding deeply betrayed.
"No! You know I think you're the best at frightening people in all of Halloween Town!" she exclaimed. "I just want Stoker and everyone to know that too."
"And Oogie Boogie?"
Sally bit her lip. She wished he hadn't brought up the king of Halloween Town. Everyone knew attracting his attention was an invitation to become an ingredient in his snake and spider stew. On rare occasions, though, he'd recognize a young monster as a shadow among shadows; and when he did, that monster was almost certain to be the Primary Scare for the next few years. Anyone who argued became stew. "Please, Jack, don't bring him into this," Sally urged.
"Why not?" Jack said. "He seems to be my only option if I want to do any real scaring."
"Just don't," she insisted. "People love you. We'd all… miss you."
"Only if it went wrong."
"He's Oogie Boogie, Jack!" Sally cried, starting to get extremely frustrated with her best friend. "There are so many ways for it to go wrong, they're hard to count! I'm not denying you're scary, but presenting yourself to Oogie Boogie is just…"
"Risky, I know," Jack conceded. He draped himself unceremoniously over one of the headstones. "What am I going to do, Sally?" he asked, his usual air of confidence burst and replaced with a sort of sad desperation.
"I don't know," she said. She smiled and added, "Maybe eat the rest of that fish before you waste away? You're just bone."
Jack grinned. "And why should I listen to someone whose head is stuffed with leaves?" he countered as he popped another piece of fish bone into his mouth.
"At least I have something in my head," she teased. "Your skull is as empty as the vampires' coffins."
"Leaves for brains."
"Bonehead."
"Sally!" a voice cried in the distance, quickly followed by the sound of an electric wheelchair. She froze.
"Finklestein," Jack murmured. He looked towards Sally. "Want me to cover for you?"
She nodded and Jack got up from the headstone. He took several large strides across the graveyard and leant against the base of the statue of a demon, looking like he'd just been pondering the meaning of death.
"Sally!"
"Doctor!" Jack cried cordially. He bounded across the graveyard to where the mad scientist sat in his wheelchair, looking for his creation with a curled beak. "Oh, thank goodness I found you! I've been wanting to ask about that new theorem you were talking about last Thursday."
"Electromagnetic pulses," Finklestein replied. "A very interesting course of study."
"That's exactly what I thought," Jack said, wrapping a bony arm around the scientist's shoulders. "I was thinking we could talk about it over some nightlock tea. You still do like nightlock tea, don't you?"
"Yes, of course! But…" Finklestein manuevered out from under Jack's arm. "You haven't seen Sally anywhere have you?"
"Sally?" Jack asked, pretending not to know whom he was talking about. At a suspicious look from Dr. Finklestein, he added, "Oh! That Sally! No, I'm afraid I haven't."
The scientist curled his beak again. "That treacherous girl has been sneaking out at all hours. She's not ready for so much…"
"Excitement, I know," Jack said, beginning to grow tired of even this much conversation with Sally's creator. He shivered to think of how long it would take him to explain that theorem. "I'm sure she'll come back in time. Now, about that theorem."
Sally listened as the hum of Finklestein's electric wheelchair faded into the distance, along with the sound of Jack's voice. She breathed a little sigh of relief and got up from behind the headstone. She'd have to thank Jack later for luring him away, especially if he actually had to listen to Dr. Finklestein explain electromagnetism. She brushed a bit of dirt off her dress. He was bound to find someway to enjoy it, even if it was just by counting the number of times the Doctor said "magnet". That was one of the things she loved about Jack. He could always find a way to make a bad situation look brighter.
As she started to walk down Main Street towards the Witches' House, she began to think of how much of a talent that really was. King Oogie Boogie hadn't paid any attention to Halloween Town or its citizens for as long as she could remember. The oddly angled buildings lining the main road were falling to pieces and the road was so filled with cracks and holes that made it nearly impossible to walk at anything like a steady pace. Sally had to stop every few seconds to navigate around a ditch or make sure that her bad foot didn't get stuck in a crack.
One of the vampires darted between the buildings, hissing every time its sensitive skin came in contact with the pale yellow light. Distracted by the sudden movement, Sally accidentally wedged her foot in a crack and pulled her leg off completely. She cursed under her breath as she bent down to pick up some of the leaves that had fallen from her thigh. "Just what I need," she grumbled as she pulled her leg out of the crack in the road and sat down next to it. As she pulled her needle from behind her ear and her spool of thread from her pocket, she recalled the times Dr. Finklestein had told her about the days before Oogie Boogie's reign. Apparently, all four of the vampires had once carried around parasols during the day to protect themselves from the sun. She'd seen the remnants of one of these articles once. It had been smashed to pieces by the side of the road—no doubt the work of one of "Oogie's Boys." She shuddered. No one wanted to cross the three trick-or-treaters. They were the cruelest children anyone had ever seen, in Halloween Town or in the human world. They also had a habit of preying on ghouls who were already at a disadvantage. Even though it was early afternoon, she didn't want to be sitting by the side of the road with one leg missing for too long in case they got any ideas.
As she pulled the thread tight, once again attaching her leg to her body, she heard the familiar hungry snarl of Hugh the Werewolf as he carefully padded his way down the street. He was a monster she'd actually seen decline. He'd been doing fairly well, keeping to the shadows and attracting little attention, until Oogie had banned hunting in the forest. Now his fur lay in patches with big bald splotches between them, making him look as patchwork as Sally. She idly wondered, as she put her needle back behind her ear, where he managed to get what little meat he subsisted on, since no one else could get any either. Whatever he did find couldn't consist of more than a few scraps. She could see all of his ribs through his shirt. Hugh nodded politely at the disheveled ragdoll as he passed her and she gave him a little smile in return.
Just as she was getting to her feet again, she heard a low voice call her name. The ragdoll turned to see Jason looking at her from behind the rusted iron fence surrounding his yard. The fence was only about two feet high and Jason was well over seven foot, but the ungainly monster never stepped over it. Instead he treated it as if it were taller than he was. Whenever anyone did hop over the fence, his jaw would go slack and he'd clap as though they'd just performed the most impressive magic trick in the world.
"Sally?" he repeated.
Sally smiled politely at him. "Yes?"
"Head hurt," Jason explained, motioning towards the axe embedded in his skull. He cocked his head to one side. "Help?"
"Jason, Dr. Finklestein's the doctor," she said, worrying her bottom lip. "I just help sometimes. Maybe if…"
"Sally do it," he said. "Sally good. Good doctor."
"Jason, I'm not a…" She stopped at a confused look from the behemoth. She pursed her lips together and thought. "I guess if I used some larkspur on it…"
Jason's face lit up. "See! Good doctor!" he said, clapping his hands. "Good, good doctor."
"But I'm not… I was going to get lunch..." She gazed at the monster in front of her for a moment before letting out a little sigh. "I'll go get it," she said before turning and heading towards Dr. Finklestein's.
"Good doctor, good doctor," he sang to himself as Sally clumsily walked down the street towards Dr. Finklestein's laboratory.
Sally smiled and shook her head. "I just hope the real doctor isn't in."
"I'm really sorry to interrupt you, Doctor," Jack said after draining the last bit of nightlock tea from his cup. He hurriedly got up from the table and began clearing it. "But I'm afraid I have to go talk to Grendel. She's been practicing slipping silently from underneath beds and needs a little help. I hope you don't mind."
"Not at all, my dear boy," Dr. Finklestein exclaimed. "I think you have the basic principles down, in any case."
"I certainly hope so," Jack commented, rubbing the back of his skull. It had been three hours since he'd left the graveyard with Dr. Finklestein and the doctor had talked about electromagnetism the entire time. He wagered that he could probably now make a conductor and motor of his own if he had to. "Well, it was so nice having this chat with you," he said as he ushered the Doctor to the door.
"My pleasure. It's always nice to talk to an enquiring young mind."
Jack grinned at the compliment. Just as he was about to close the door, Dr. Finklestein pulled up to it again. "You will tell me if you see Sally," he said, looking at Jack over his goggles. He narrowed his beady eyes at Jack. "I worry you know. She's not ready for so much…"
"Excitement. Yes. Of course, I will," Jack said, crossing two bony fingers behind his back. "Now if you'll excuse me, I shouldn't keep Grendel waiting."
"Of course, of course," the Doctor murmured, pulling away from the door.
Jack watched from the window as Dr. Finklestein whirred his way down the street. When he'd finally made it out of view, Jack breathed a little sigh of relief and sank against the door. He enjoyed company, but there was only so much scientific theory anyone could take in one sitting.
He glanced at the crooked clock on the wall. He really did have to talk to Grendel, especially with Halloween only three weeks away. She was hoping to perfect slipping silently from room to room by the end of the week. Jack would have told her not to worry about it if it weren't time for reviews. Performance reviews dictated who stayed at home during Halloween and who got to go to the land of the humans. Each year, all the inhabitants of Halloween Town, with a few noted exceptions, lined up outside the Town Hall and showed off their terrifying tricks. The ones with the best marks would be given specific jobs, such as Darter or Creaker. Every monster's dream, though, was to be chosen as the Primary Scare. Whoever was chosen would be the main event that Halloween and would have a say in how everything was put together. It was the implicit job of everyone else in Halloween Town to bolster the primary, putting their own talents on the back burner if they wouldn't help the primary to shine.
And there was another reason to prepare for performance reviews. Reviews decided who would be the celebratory garnish in King Oogie Boogie's Halloween snake and spider stew. The monster with the lowest marks got that privilege. It was called being "sacked" because whoever the unlucky monster was would be thrown in an old, dusty, burlap bag and delivered to Oogie Boogie's house. No one ever returned. The older ghouls cited it as a reasonable sacrifice to make to their great king, but that didn't keep Jack from feeling a tightening in his ribs whenever he saw the unfortunate monster being hauled away.
Of course, Jack wasn't worried about getting sacked. He'd gotten top marks in performance reviews without even trying for as long as he could remember. So instead, he focused on helping other monsters. He'd tutor young monsters in how to leap gracefully from headstone to headstone and help the older ones brush up on their signature tricks. He'd learned quite a bit from everyone he worked with, and rarely lost anyone to the sack. The few times he had, it had been a devastating loss, one which had goaded him into working harder than ever with the next year's group. Consequently, he never lost anyone two years in a row. This made him a very popular tutor amongst the citizens of Halloween Town, second only to the judge himself, Mr. Stoker. The head ghoul never lost anyone he took under his wing for the simple reason that he was the one deciding who would get sacked.
Jack got up from off the floor and dusted off his suit. He really shouldn't have spent as much time talking to Dr. Finklestein as he had. After Grendel, he had several other monsters to coach, not even counting the night sessions he did this close to reviews. He took the bone fish Sally had given him out of his pocket and picked off a bit of fin. She was right in saying that he didn't eat enough, but how could he find the time with so much to do? This year, especially, he'd been booked up to his skull. And, on top of that, he was trying for Primary Scare. He simply didn't have time for things like eating.
Or sleeping, he noted ruefully as he headed out the door. He hadn't gotten a full night's sleep in about a week. It was starting to become a problem. Only yesterday, Edgar had been forced to wake him up during the middle of his tutoring session. He said that he'd tried scaring him awake, but that Jack had been sound asleep. Jack had scheduled him for another round this evening, along with profuse apologies for falling asleep on him. He glanced up at the clock tower as he sprinted towards the Town Hall. At this rate, he wouldn't have any time for his own practice. He grinned to himself. It didn't matter much anyway. He was sure to get Primary Scare this year.
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