A/N: So, obviously this takes place in the modern world. Since this is only a one-shot, there is no bending and Zuko is not scarred. I really just wrote this because I thought it seemed funny… but then again, I'm easily amused.
Disclaimer: I do not own Avatar: The Last Airbender, Batman, or any of the comics mentioned in this one-shot. You can bet your sweet booty that if I did own Batman then Jason Todd would be shirtless all the time. Anyways, enjoy!
Thursday was usually his favorite day of the week. He always got out of work early and would go grab something to eat before enjoying his downtime. This Thursday, however, had Zuko running all over the place to find some stupid present for the young brother of his sister's friend.
So now here he was, walking through a small plaza, trying to find a gift for a child he'd only ever seen a handful of times, and having very little luck in his pursuit. The raven-haired man debated on texting his sister to see if she at least had any ideas on what to get the toddler. Zuko halted his frantic search for a moment, standing in front of a shoe store to type away on his phone and contemplating if maybe the two year old needed sneakers.
"The least she could do is help me. It's not like it's my friend." He mumbled bitterly under his breath. As his thumb tapped the send button, the scent of mint and vanilla caught his attention. Zuko looked up to see what smelled so warm and intoxicating, only to see a woman briskly passing by without so much as sparing him a glance.
To say she was beautiful was a gross understatement. The woman who'd caught his eye had flowing brown hair, skin tanned to perfection, and a petite, lean frame. On top of that, the classy white blouse and tight leather pants she wore were definitely working for her. Before he could get her attention, she'd disappeared into the store just ahead of him. Tucking his phone away, Zuko followed her as quickly and discreetly as he could. Upon opening the shop door, he beheld a sight most unexpected. What the young man was met with was a comic book store in all its nerdy glory.
It was filled with comics, as its namesake suggested, action figures, posters and wall scrolls, weapon replicas, and even masks. Had he still been in high school, the place would have made him sick for sure. However, he was a respectable entrepreneur who wore suits and dress shoes and entertained himself with desk toys when no one was around. Said businessman found the mystery woman's destination to be nothing short of peculiar but brushed it off to scan the store for her.
After a moment of uneasy searching, he found her looking through comics on the far right of the shop. His gait was as confident as he felt, knowing the power he had over women. Zuko had never been an ugly guy, not even while he was in the merciless clutches of puberty, and he knew how to talk to women. When he was close enough to her and saw she held an issue of The Amazing Spider Man, he smirked.
Spider Man, huh? She's trying to be geeky. How adorably typical.
Where he himself was nowhere near being a super-hero expert, he knew just enough to call her out on her bluff. Post-revelation, he would tell her not to worry and how he thought it was cute then invite her for dinner tomorrow. Any indication that mere moments ago he had felt utterly misplaced had been erased as he absentmindedly reached over and grabbed a random comic. The simple gesture, it seemed, caught the woman's attention at last.
Her eyes, which were a bright and heart-stopping blue, swept across his form skeptically before stopping on the graphic novel in his hands. She raised her brow and smiled, shaking her head prior to flipping through the pages of the book she held.
"Is something funny?" His voice was smooth and held a hint of amusement. The girl beside him scoffed before answering.
"Well yeah, it's Deadpool. Wade Wilson," She stated as if he should have understood. He only looked at her blankly. "You know, Merc with a mouth, constantly breaks the fourth wall, chimichangas, ring a bell?" Clearly growing disgusted that he wasn't catching on, the girl set down the Spider Man comic to further explain. "Maybe you should look at the book in your hands, sir."
Zuko glanced down to see he had indeed taken an issue of Deadpool. He had to think, and fast. "Hey, now, don't spoil it for me. I just heard about Deadpool a little while ago and haven't had time to check it out until now."
"You realize he's been around since '91, right?" She crossed her arms over her chest, and he responded with waving the book in her face playfully.
"Obviously not," Zuko checked the publisher and noted that it was a Marvel series. "Besides, I'm more of a DC kind of guy anyways." He fibbed.
Trying to find a different comic, the girl gave him a disbelieving once-over. "Is that right?" Without even looking, she grabbed an Iron Man comic as the well-dressed man before her nodded. "Wouldn't peg you for a DC guy… Or Marvel… Or Dark Horse… Or Image," As she laughed at her own cleverness, Zuko grew anxious.
She was beginning to see through his guise. If he didn't act quickly, it was all over. "I wouldn't peg you as the type of girl who reads comics either. I mean, what are those shoes? Are you wearing Prada? Those aren't even knockoffs. Who wears genuine Prada by day and reads Spider Man by night?"
Leaving her momentarily speechless, Zuko was about to pat himself on the back when she spoke up. "You can tell these are Prada?" A slight blush rapidly spread across his face and left his ears pink.
His hands were raised before him, Deadpool comic since put back, as he tried to clear things up. "Yeah, but it's not like that. I've had to go shopping with my mom and sister a lot in the past, so I know them when I see them." Rather than casually brushing it off, the blue-eyed woman took an awkward step to the side before opening up the comic she held. "My name's Zuko, by the way." He added in a way that would make a thirteen year old cringe from the sheer awkwardness.
Keeping up her cool front, the girl looked at him from the corner of her eye and decided to give him a break. "Katara," She said simply. "So you're a DC fan?" When he answered in the affirmative as she expected, Katara sighed.
That's a crying shame. He'll probably make up some crap about how awesome he thinks Superman is, or worse, Aquaman.
"Yeah, yeah I am. Batman's my favorite out of, well, everybody everywhere." Katara fought the urge to laugh at the hesitance in his answer. Of course she knew he was a fraud from the get-go, but at the very least, he was an attractive fraud. His gold eyes did not go unnoticed, and she found herself appreciating their unique color.
Trying to choose whether or not to prove her superior knowledge of super heroes and anti-heroes alike was always Katara's hardest decision. It was a no-brainer in the past, but there were several incidents in which she'd been thrown out of the shop because of aggressive behavior that had been provoked by her competitive nature. That; and some scrawny otaku trying to tell her that Ghost Rider could take on Thor and emerge the victor. That fight ended with Katara breaking the guy's nose and telling him to stick to his manga as her older brother dragged her outside.
This Zuko guy in front of her seemed harmless, and ignorant, enough to show him just how much she knew. "Batman is pretty epic," She begrudgingly admitted, being a dedicated Marvel fan herself. "Do you favor any villain in particular?"
She's making conversation! And I know this one!
"Probably the Joker," The answer was valid but still pretty vague. The Joker was one of the most badass villains in comic book history, but because of that he was also the most well-known. "What about you?"
"Mr. Freeze," Katara responded without missing a beat. "And before you say anything, I know he has his lame moments but he's a legit character. Everything he's done was all in an effort to save his wife. Call me corny, but I think that's beautiful." The flash of white from Zuko's smile was nothing more than that. A mere flash, and then Katara asked a question that made him go pale. "Who's your favorite Robin?"
That was it! She knew she had him then, it was the inquiry that sent most men hitting on her packing. Never would she allow them to specify their favored Boy Wonder numerically. They had to give her the full name and their opinions on their mature alter egos, save for Damian Wayne. Sometimes she would switch it up and ask who the man's favorite Batgirl was instead.
Today, though, she watched Zuko flounder hopelessly and wondered if he'd be able to find a way out of answering. Honestly, she was waiting for something stupid like "how could I possibly decide," or "don't make me choose, they're all great". Unfortunately for him, she wouldn't be taking any of that nonsense at this point.
For one reason or another, though, she threw him a bone. "You'd better not say Dick Grayson just because his parents were killed by Tony Zucco, Zuko."
Normally Zuko would have found it enticing when a girl teased him, but there was just something off about it this time. Maybe it was the way his name rolled off her tongue so perfectly. It made him wonder what her mouth tasted like.
Swallowing the lump in his throat, he laughed nervously. "I can't help it, you know?" A hand ran through his hair and his smile fell. "You're very cruel to keep this act up." The joke was only somewhat serious, but now that he knew she knew, there was no need to avoid it.
"You're very stupid to keep your own act up." Blunt as it was, it was true. "You think you're the first guy to approach me under the impression I had no idea what I was talking about? Please, I deal with men like you on a regular basis." The brunette bit. "And then there are men who try to test me to see if I actually know anything. It's like if I'm not being tested, then I'm the one giving the test."
Bells jingled behind the pair, signaling someone had either entered or exited the store, neither bothered to check, though. Sadness and irritation were evident in the girl's cerulean gaze. Zuko was preparing to apologize, but Katara cut him off. "I mean, do you have any idea how annoying that is? Yes, I'm a girl with a great job and I dress really nicely, so I can understand being shocked for a minute. But does every male have to question it? Just because I have a vagina that means I can't like super heroes or have to cosplay as Catwoman or Rogue? What is that all about?"
Understanding her strife, Zuko looked at her with sympathy. "Sometimes, we men don't know when to quit while we're ahead."
Scoffing, she half-smiled and looked up at him through her lashes. "You got that right." Zuko smiled at her, noticing how much shorter she was even with the heels. Her hand went behind her for a moment and emerged with yet another comic. On the cover was a small boy kneeling between what Zuko assumed to be his dead parents. In red and white lettering at the top read Batman: Year One Part One.
"I buy this for you, you buy a drink for me." He took the comic from her with a smirk and raised eyebrow. It would be foolish not to agree.
"How do you do that?" He asked curiously while handing the comic back to her. Her cheery face swiftly changed to a serious expression that almost worried him.
"I'm Batman." She claimed in a horrible imitation of Christian Bale's version of the Caped Crusader's voice. "Come on, let me pay for this and you can get me that drink." Voice back to its sweet, original tone, Katara went up to the register to pay for the comic.
Behind her, Zuko couldn't believe his luck that day. Sure, he'd picked up gorgeous strangers before, but this was the first time the tables had been turned on him… and he was able to take the girl out on a date regardless. She should have slapped him, she should have grimaced while turning him down, she should have laughed in his face and walked away. Katara did none of those things, however, and instead told him they were going out.
Bells at the front of the store jingled once more to bring Zuko back to reality. He saw Katara standing there with a bag in her hand. When he made it up to her, she gingerly gave him the bag with a sincere smile. It was then Zuko realized that this was the first gift a woman had given him that actually meant something.
Where it was true they knew next to nothing about each other, Zuko felt in his bones that he would do anything to make sure that nerd stayed in his life. Even the buzzing in his pocket couldn't distract him from this moment. A stupid text from his spoiled sister could wait. He had a date with a super hero.
A/N: Okay, so that was really cheesy and I think that's why I love it so much. There wasn't a particular reason I chose Batman to be the main focus of their conversation, but I did think it was pretty cool that Mark Hamill voices the Joker in most cases. It was only natural that I make the Joker Zuko's favorite villain, right? Well anyways, I'm pretty sure I'm keeping this as a one-shot but it all depends on the results. Let me know what you guys think! I really hope you enjoyed it.