Disclaimer: I own nothing
Challenge:
Quote to use:
"I've told you before, I love like a madman." he said. "Immoderate, Jealous, Possessive... I'm absolutely intolerable."
Chosen Character: Hannah Abbott
Hannah Abbott
The first time I really got to know Neville was when I had my breakdown during the O.W.L.s.
As I sat in that Herbology Class I realised I couldn't do it and found myself in the hospital wing. I was assigned a tutor and that's when I properly met Neville Longbottom.
Sure I had seen him around school and stuff but I'd never sat down and properly got to know him - even in DA I never really spoke to him.
Until he started tutoring me that is.
That's when I saw the real Neville, not the shy clumsy forgetful boy that everyone else saw - instead I saw a kind boy, someone with so much patience to help me for hours until I learned what I needed. Someone who cracked jokes and kept my mind off the fear of taking the owls, someone who was slowly becoming more confident in himself. Someone who had a whole other side to him buried deep.
Gone were my doubts that he would be able to help me with the subject, instead I realised that not even Hermione Granger could teach me as well as he did. He seemed to understand on a more personal level about struggling in classes and found a way to teach me where I enjoyed what I was learning more.
That was the start of a wonderful friendship. The only problem was we were in different houses and Hufflepuff generally shared classes with the Ravenclaws so it wasn't that often me and Neville hung out. We did tend to have Herbology together at least and he always made sure to further explain the lesson to me, making me understand in ways that the Professor didn't.
It took me a long time to realise my feelings had changed, it was during our last year at school when we returned I just saw him differently, then watched him defend the students and set up the Room of Requirement as a safe haven. I realised I was in love with the brave Gryffindor.
It was a sudden epiphany for me when I realised and there were times I thought maybe just maybe he felt the same. Cormac McLaggen asking me out and then trying to kiss me caused Neville to disappear for an hour and come back with blood on his hands. Cormac didn't come near me again. There were other smaller situations too and deep inside I revelled in the fact that he could possibly like me and would be the madman he always described himself as, and allow me to see the other side of him that he rarely talked about and rarely showed.
But I wasn't the only one who had noticed all the good things about him - someone else had.
Luna Lovegood.
I went through the usual emotions over it when Neville first told me that she has asked him out at the end of the war, I eventually had to deal with the fact that he had chosen someone else - someone who wasn't me.
It wasn't long before Luna had, in her own way informed me that I owled Neville an awful lot.
I reduced the owls I sent him. They became fewer and far between. By the time Luna and Neville were celebrating their one year anniversary I was sending an owl monthly with about 3 paragraphs written on, rather than the lengthy owls I used to share with him.
My whole month could be summed up in 3 paragraphs just a quick update really.
Neville always owled back the next day, and at first when I slowly reduced my owls he made a habit of sending extra to fill in the blanks. His were long messages that I would take my time to read, knowing that it would be a long time until I replied. He expressed concern for me, but never took the time to come and check I was ok.
I wasn't.
It was at that point that my great-uncle Tom died, leaving me the Leaky Cauldron. I had already lost my parents and the only member of my family had died. I realised I had next to nothing.
I still had a few friends from school who would visit me every so often, ask for me to join them in Diagon Alley when they were visiting and each time I would force myself to get out and pretend to be happy to have the company when all I wanted was to shut myself in my room and work out where I went wrong with Neville - what point should I have told him my feelings instead of hiding them away, and think about my family.
It took a couple of weeks for the place to be signed over to me and I invited some others from Hogwarts to join me in having a drink. Susan Bones, Justin Finch-Fletchley and Ernie Macmillian all came along. I thought about inviting Neville but remembering the past conversation with Luna about overstepping my boundaries I chose to leave him out.
I mean I had to move on after all and didn't have a choice really I didn't want to cause problems between him and Luna.
It was a good time to catch up and my friends all avoided the topic of Neville. I had drunkenly blurted the whole thing out to them months before, stating that I spoke to him on a monthly basis, far from the daily chats back at Hogwarts. They knew I was in love with him and they all knew the situation and they all decided its best that they don't say his name in front of me.
A couple of hours into the drinks when my friends looked up and shock came over their faces. I turned around to find him there behind me, a frown on his face and his hands in his pockets. He looked almost hurt.
"Little get together?" he asked and I nodded. It had been a couple of months after school when I last saw him and by my calculations that was about a year and a half maybe even 2 years ago.
"All your friends here?" he asked "because last time I checked I thought I was on that list."
I didn't know what to say to him, but Ernie who had Susan wrapped in his arms moments ago stood up.
"Look Neville it's not like that... it's complicated" he said.
"Well would someone enlighten me?" he said, still with the same tone, but I could see the slight anger cross his face but he hid it well, although I was familiar with the facial expression, Neville was never one to show his emotions.
I bit my lip. Questions I could avoid by owl but how could I avoid them when he was stood here face to face with me. I could never tell a real lie to him in the past, instead I always avoided what I couldn't answer. This wouldn't work today though.
I noticed the group behind him - Luna, Ginny Weasley and the golden trio. They stood waiting for him, although Luna looked annoyed - angry even that he had come over. Her gaze was directly on me.
"There is nothing to explain Neville" I said, holding the tears back knowing that I would be giving up the last remains of the friendship I had long treasured. "We just lost contact and grew apart. You have your friends now and I have mine" I told him trying to keep the wobble from my voice.
I registered the shocked look on Neville's face followed by a brief look of pain before his emotions closed again. He nodded and without a word walked out with Luna rushing behind. I found myself rushing out of the pub to the upstairs room before any of my friends could stop me.
Hannah didn't notice Neville's friends approaching hers as she left the room.
Ginny and the trio sat down facing Hannah's friends and they all looked at each other in silence.
"What's really going on" Ginny asked, looking at Susan.
Susan didn't speak so Ginny turned her gaze to Ernie and finally to Justin.
"Something's happened. Its clear on all your faces." Hermione said.
The Hufflepuff trio looked at each other. Could they really betray Hannah's secret to the group who were also Luna's friends?
The Gryffindors realised that if they wanted to know it would take a bit more work as the others weren't giving anything up.
"Neville misses her you know" Harry said carefully "he doesn't understand why she seemed to pull away from him. The letters got longer and longer between replies and what she wrote was shorter and shorter until the last letter which she refused the owl and had the owl return it."
The Hufflepuffs frowned "she didn't tell us she returned the letter" Justin said looking at the other two for confirmation "we had no idea. She seemed more upset because of her great-uncle she never mentioned ignoring Neville's letters altogether..."
"So you've discussed Neville's letters" pushed Hermione and Justin sighed.
"Ok we know all about the letters. It's not Hannah's fault" he said.
"Neville always replies the minute he receives one. I've been there - he gets the letter and drops whatever he is doing to write a reply. His face lights up when he gets one"
"It's not Neville's fault either its..." Ernie started and then stopped.
"Its... what" Ginny said.
Susan sighed and ran her hands over her face.
"Hannah was told to stay away from Neville. She was told that she contacts him too much that she needs to get on with her life as he's getting on with his. She was told not to overstep the boundaries." Susan told them and the girls looked at each other.
They turned to the boys "We told you it was her. Now do you believe us?" Hermione said to Harry and Ron.
Ron rubbed the back of his neck "ok Hermione you were right. Again. Are you happy?"
Hermione huffed and shook her head "I'm not happy no. I want Neville to be happy and he's miserable without Hannah."
"I told you the way she smirks when she thinks we're not looking when Neville mentions he hasn't heard from Hannah" Ginny added "and just now the looks she was giving Hannah."
"But maybe she was angry with what Hannah was saying?" asked Ron and Hermione and Ginny looked at him as though he were stupid.
"Or not..." mumbled Ron.
"Hannah has been just as miserable" Ernie said and the others nodded. "She misses him" Justin added "she said what she said earlier because she had no choice".
Harry nodded "so what do we do about this?" he asked and Susan sighed "There's nothing we can do. Hannah didn't want anyone to know. She didn't want to cause problems between Neville and Luna..."
"I think its up to me to decide whether I should be informed of things regarding me" came a voice by the door, as the door swung open to reveal Neville. He had been coming back to the room but heard them talking and eavesdropped instead.
"I heard the whole thing and Luna will be returning soon I gave her the slip to come back here"
The others went silent as Neville walked in.
"Justin, Susan, Ernie - why did you lot never tell me - I know you were Hannah's friends first but I thought we were becoming friends too" he said and they all looked away "we're sorry but Hannah swore us to secrecy. I know that's not good enough but that's all there was to it. We only found out a few ago ourselves when we had to get her drunk to find out why she was depressed."
"She was depressed?" Neville's head shot up out of his hands to look at Susan who had spoken.
"Yes. We have to force her to leave her room. I think she barely leaves to take meals" Susan replied.
Neville opened his mouth to speak but they heard footsteps. "Is Neville here" came a voice by the doorway and Luna appeared frowning and a smile crossed her face when she saw him. He patted the seat next to him and she came and sat with him.
"Isn't it best we leave?" she said in a soft voice and Neville turned to look at her. He shifted his whole body so he was facing her.
"Why did you warn Hannah off?"
Luna hadn't been expecting this question and her mouth opened and closed in surprise.
"Of course I didn't warn her off" she said but Neville raised an eyebrow "yet you never share my concerns that my friend is disappearing on me, you never seem to care. You just tell me that she's moving on with her life. So I'll ask you again Luna and don't lie to me a second time. What did you say to her?"
Luna was quiet for a few minutes but Neville never looked away from her. Finally Luna spoke. "It wasn't anything bad I just asked her why she messages you so much and all the time. I said I was concerned that since you were moving on with your life that maybe she wasn't with hers."
Neville sighed "so lets take the truth from that. You told Hannah you don't like her messaging me as much as she does or at all. You told her to move on with her own life and I've moved on with mine. You told her to leave me alone."
He wasn't fooled by the crocodile tears coming down her cheeks.
"Luna I want you to go with Ginny and Harry to your place and pack anything I've left there and give it to them. Ron, Hermione can you please go to mine and anything you suspect of being Luna's please pack it. Hermione I'm guessing you have some handy spells to find out what items belong to her. Hermione nodded and Luna grabbed Neville's arm.
"Neville" she begged but he pulled his arm away "you might have lost me my best friend. We're done Luna" he said walking the way Hannah ran earlier.
"Susan are there wards up there?" Neville called and Susan jumped up and followed him. She led him to the set of rooms and removed the wards to let Neville in. After he went in he heard Susan reset the wards. He walked around her place and the first thing he noticed was 3 pictures on her fireplace next to a bowl of floo powder. The first was of her with her parents, the second her and the other Hufflepuffs. The third was their DA group.
He walked around, thinking that she hadn't been here long to accumulate stuff but surely she brought stuff with her?
He opened a door leading off from the living room and found himself in the hall and on the second try found her bedroom. He saw her curled on the bed sobbing clutching a picture.
"Hannah" he said from where he stood, he didn't want to go over there and scare her. "Its Neville".
She had stopped crying at the sound of his voice but remained frozen where she was laying.
"I know everything. Luna's gone now. I broke up with her" he said and she sat up "I didn't want to come between you and her" she said, and he could hear the wobbling in her voice.
"You didn't Hannah she done that to herself. I just don't understand why you thought she meant more to me then you do" he said, sitting next to her on the bed.
"Because Neville you never told me otherwise. Once you started dating her I tried to see you a bit less so you had time for Luna too but then you made more time and I was slowly shut out. That's why I would owl you because you had the time for owls at least and then Luna warned me to stay away from you and... well here we are"
Neville frowned in thought "I didn't realise that I was shutting you out Hannah I didn't mean to I swear... it's just that I'm not good showing my emotions"
"You've mentioned but that's half the problem. If we can't even express our emotions how are we supposed to know what's going on?"
"What is going on Hannah?" he said and slowly pulled the photo from her grasp. He looked at it and realised it was a picture of her and him and she kept it in her bedroom? She took it back and put it on the side next to her bed carefully turning it to where it should stand.
"Everything Neville. That's what. I've lost my family, lost my best friend and have this place to run and don't have a clue what I'm doing!"
"You haven't lost me, and I can't do anything about you losing your family except be here for you when you need me and want to talk. As for this place, I'll help you all I can - all you have to do is ask and I'll be here. But Hanna, what's going on with you and I? I... it's just back when we were younger when I tried to get close to you, you act like you're not interested but then I find you crying over losing me? It just seems there's a lot more to this?"
"Fine Neville I can't really do much more damage then I have already so you want the truth? The truth is seeing you with Luna made me feel sick. For our whole last year in school I realised I was in love with you but she got your attention before I could get the courage to tell you. I wanted you to be with me and was riddled with jealousy and hated it. You were never clear over your feelings towards me because you don't show emotions Neville so where you think you tried to get close to me, it wasn't enough to show me that it was you expressing interest otherwise I would have shown it back."
Neville bowed his head for a moment and then stood up "you want me to let go of my emotions and tell you exactly what I feel?" he asked her and as she nodded he done just that.
"I've told you before, I love like a madman." he said. "Immoderate, Jealous, Possessive... I'm absolutely intolerable."
He paused.
"But I kept it all inside because if I let myself fall in love with someone then the emotions overtake me. No other man would be allowed near you Hannah unless I trusted him, you would be mine and I would be yours. No discussion about women not belonging to anyone because if you wanted to be with me Hannah you would accept that you belong to me. I'll let you see the one side of me that's been hidden if you choose to, but it may be too much for you to accept."
She nodded again "I want all of you Neville every emotion every feeling. I'm already in love with you. I want you to be mine. I don't want to see another girl touch you or hug you unless I trust that they aren't after you.
Neville smiled at her and joined her on the bed again.
"So I'm yours?" he asked and she nodded "if you want to be".
"And you're mine?" he asked and again she nodded "if you want me"
He pulled her close to his chest "I do want you" he answered holding her close.
An hour later the 2 groups less Luna went to check on them and snuck into the apartment, Susan able to undo the wards. The boys hovered nervously in the living room warning the girls not to go into the bedroom in case. Ginny snorted and started walking there anyways with Hermione and Susan following curiously.
They opened the door to find Hannah and Neville fully clothed, her asleep on his chest and his arms wrapped around her.
"I think they're fixed now" Hermione said as they closed the door and left.
I really wanted Neville to use the words "Hufflepuffs assemble" Don't know why but it didn't fit in somehow, maybe because of Neville's mood at the time it would have been written he wouldn't have been in the mood for jokes. Shame really.
Sorry if you didn't enjoy it, I was given a list of 4 characters to choose from for my challenge and I didn't want to change them.
Also I always imagined Neville having a dark-side to him where he would be getting in fights and causing trouble and stuff so this just worked for me for the story.
Sorry to anyone who likes Luna, but she won't be like this in other stories just this one as I think Luna is great :)