River was just too sneaky for her own good. He never realized until it was too late that she had a hold of his braces and if he moved she'd snap them. Really, he blamed himself. This was a River who had just finished her first year at the university, and still acted a whole hell of a lot like Mels. He'd wondered what would happen if a younger version of his wife came on board the TARDIS with him, and he wasn't surprised when she had started messing with him instead of flying the TARDIS. She'd managed to do it twice, and she currently had the back of the braces in her hand while he was looking at the console.

"River," he warned, voice low.

"Yes darling?" Of course she was going to play the innocent. Her voice was incredibly sweet, and if he hadn't already known what she was doing, that would throw up more than a few red flags.

He sighed, and made to move clockwise around the console, only wincing a little bit when River released the braces and they snapped the middle of his back. She giggled, a sound that was garaunteed not to come out of her mouth if he hadn't been so curious about her younger self. It was less like spending time with his wife and more like babysitting the child of some friends. Which, of course, he sort of was. He just thought she might have been the tiniest bit more mature by now.

"But why would I be right about that?" he muttered under his breath, flicking the stabilizers back from where River had moved them earlier. He liked that noise, and even though she was the child of the TARDIS, it was still his TARDIS. He could fly it however he liked.

"What?" River asked from the jump seat across the room.

"Nothing, dear."

She laughed a bit. "Is someone in a bad mood today?"

Meeting her eyes with the smallest of glares, he said, "I wasn't until you started messing with my clothes."

"I could mess a lot more, if you like," she snickered, hopping off the seat to stand before him.

But this time he knew what she was going to do. As soon as her hands splayed over his chest, he slipped hers up the back of her shirt, just barely.

"Have you parked her?" River's voice had become husky, a tone he knew very well no matter where they were.

"Yes," he breathed, hands still inching up her back.

"It's not as if we're on a schedule."

"Nope."

Silence passed between them while their eyes were locked on each other, and then they both moved quick as a flash.

River had his braces in her hands again, and he had the back of her bra fisted in one of his own.

"We can either snap them or take them off," the Doctor whispered, staring into her eyes pointedly.

"Hardest decision I've ever made."

"Shall I make it for you?"

"Against the console?"

"Only if you don't snap me."

She released them, gently, muttering, "You drive a hard bargain, Doctor."

"I suppose I do, but..." He pulled his hand away from her back as far as her shirt would allow, and then let it snap back, making her yelp. "You deserve it!" he laughed, whirling away from her.

"You're gonna pay for that, Doctor!"