Disclaimer - I do not own the Gundam Pilots or Gundam Wing. I wrote this story in my leisure time. If you should by any chance wish to take this story, (like who would) Please give me the credit! ^.~ This story also takes place after Endless Waltz, but Treize is alive still. I'm a big fan of him and I can't stand to have him go, so he's in here. Just pretend Wufei killed his evil twin for now, k? K! *^.^* I got some of my ideas from a Dilandau fic I read… o0o0o

Warning: 1x2 and 3x4 and 6x9 and Ux13 There's a little bit of Lime and Yaoi so it shouldn't be too bad, but I should still warn you… right? And besides, it's mostly comedy! ^.^



If Heero Yuy Came in Contact With Some Sort of Drug…

By: Kitzaku Winner



The sun shone brightly across the torn and tattered abandoned battlefield. Thousands of broken and shattered pieces of Mobile Suits lay scattered across the bloodstained ground. Fires had already found a home in collapsing Leos and Tauruses, their flames dancing in the sunbeams.

Heero Yuy looked out amongst the battlefield showing no emotion in his Wing Zero. There was a glaze over his eyes and he was still unaware that he had done this. It was more than a hundred acres of Mobile Suits lying face down and tattered on the ground. Not a soul stood living but Heero.

The glaze over Heero's eyes soon dissipated as he fell out of Wing Zero and onto the hard ground below him. Once regaining his strength and stamina, Heero looked out upon the battlefield with eyes of compassion, sorrow, regret and even pity as they did not stand a chance against him and Zero. There was no one that could ever give him a fight he deserved.

He looked up once more and into the heavens. This time, seeing a face in the clouds. Heero squinted his cobalt eyes to make the face out but the wind carried the clouds across and soon it had disappeared.

Standing up, Heero clutched his arm and staggered out into the battlefield shaken. There was no reason to his fighting. Where was the purpose behind this battle? What had he accomplished? Deep in his thoughts Heero's foot caught onto a loose piece of Titanium Alloy and he fell face first into a piece of metal.

The sharp, cold blade of a slice of Alloy that stuck out from a Leo suit jabbed itself into the brown haired boy as he fell willingly towards it. If it was death this sorrowful that he must face, he must face it. There was no way of turning back now. The blade cut itself deeper into Heero's skull as his body weight sank into the full blow. Heero's blood surged around him as his pupils slowly dilated. There was no scream of pain, no sound of agony that escaped from this perfect soldier's lips. He let himself slip slowly into the depths of death.

~*~

"Hey! Heero! Wake up! Wake up!" Duo Maxwell jumped repeatedly on Heero's back, hoping to wake him up. The cobalt eyed boy turned over and Duo fell onto his stomache. Heero's eyes shot open.

"Duo! What the hell are you doing? Get off me!" Heero shoved the braided one off the bed and sat up straight. Duo rubbed the back of his neck.

"Geez, G-g-omen… I was trying to wake you up." He pouted. "You took so long I thought you were dead."

Heero looked into Duo's deep cobalt eyes. "What are you doing in my quarters anyway?"

Duo blinked. "Umm… well… it's noon already and you usually don't wake up this late, so I was kinda worried?"

Heero looked down at the floor. So he really wasn't dead. It was just a dream. He hated dreaming so much, as it always caused him to sleep later than usual. He glared once more at Duo. The damn braided boy always bothered him. Heero wasn't used to the attention and he had no idea as to why Duo bothered him in the first place. After the war was over everything was too peaceful for Heero and he had no idea what to do next.

Only today was different. Heero knew exactly what to do next. "Duo get out of my living quarters." He calmly stated and booted Duo out, slamming the door behind him.

Heero walked towards his dresser to pull out his normal forest green tank top and black spandex shorts. He pulled his shoes on and headed towards the eating quarters for his facility.

~*~

"Mr. Treize, are you sure we should be doing this?" Lady Une questioned her authority. Treize only smirked.

"Oh course M'lady. Now that the war is over, Things should lighten up a bit. This should do the trick, no?" he held up a small capsule for Lady Une to see.

"Well, alright Your Excellency." Lady Une hesitantly agreed and dropped the capsule into a glass of orange juice. "I just hope this doesn't backfire."

"It won't, Lady Une, it won't." Treize reassured her.

~*~

Heero sat down at the counter and called for the waiter. Sally Po stepped up, smiling.

"The usual, Mr. Yuy?" She asked. Heero nodded and Sally went behind the counter. Heero looked around at the familiar faces sitting around the Eating Facility.

There was Zechs Merquise and Lucrezia Noin sitting at their usual table feeding each other passion fruits and strawberries. Trowa Barton and Quatre Raberba Winner were sitting on fancy seats surrounded by Magonacs quietly sipping tea. Wufei was at his usual spot behind the counter serving others. He's always had that knack for bartending and found his only purpose after the war. Dorothy Catalonia was having her daily morning Cheerio war with Mariemaia. Relena was trying to make her way towards Heero once again, but this time tripped over one of Catherine Bloom's elephant's banana peels and fell face first into a pile of Cheerio's.

Heero turned back around just as Sally came back with his normal breakfast: Orange Juice, toast and an egg, sunny side up. Sally gladly took Heero's payment as Heero slowly began to eat.

As soon as the perfect soldier took a drink of the orange juice, he began to feel strange. He shrugged it off as an aftershock of his dream and went on to finish his breakfast. He gulped the rest of his orange juice and got up to go back up to his room.

Upon reaching the steps, Heero found the railing quite useful as his head felt very heavy and at the same time, too light to handle. Everything was going in and out of focus and it took several blinks to bring things back to normal.

After a few minutes and a few staggering falls, everything was back to normal and Heero could sit up straight again. Only this time, everything felt strange, as if emotions were surging all about him. There were emotions he felt that he never knew possible: self-pity, jealousy, energy and an even newer emotion, happiness.

When Heero reached his room, sure enough Duo was still sitting outside the door on his backside staring out into space. A sudden feeling of regret flew about Heero's body and he suddenly flew out towards Duo. Having done so, he finally felt right for once and realized his full what he was just dying to say.

"Duo! Gomen!" Heero hugged the braided ex-Pilot tight. "I didn't mean to throw you out, I hadda bad dream!" He then helped Duo to his feet.

Duo looked at Heero questioningly and put a hand to his forehead. "You… seem alright. I'll have to take your temperature."

"Nani? No, I'm alright! No worries, buddy!" Heero slapped Duo hard on the back. "I'm gonna go and talk to the Doctors. Yeah, that's what I'll do. See you around Duo Baby!"

Heero skipped off down the hallway, leaving Duo standing dumbfounded and shaking his head.

~*~

"Hi you guys! I feel great. Really great." Heero paced back and forth in front of the five Doctors.

"Eh, Heero." Doctor J spoke up. "You seem… what's the word… happy today."

"Happy? I'm more than happy. I feel great! Yes I do. Great. Great great great." Heero grinned from ear to ear.

Doctor R took a hold of Heero's arm and guided him to a laboratory. "Heero, I want to ask you some questions."

"Sure. Questions are good. Yup, they are. I like questions. Is this a game? Like 20 questions? I wanna start. Ask me a yes or no question."

"No, Heero. This is not 20 questions. I want to know something, what did you have for breakfast?" Doctor R took out a notepad.

"Well, I had some toast. Yea it was good toast. Yummy toast. And eggs too. Yeah…. Eggs… " Heero licked his lips. "And some funny tasting orange juice. Good stuff tho. Made me burp. I'll burp now if you want me to." Heero let out a huge fart. Doctor R flinched. "No wait… that was wrong… hold on… " Heero belched out the word 'hello' "There you go! Wasn't that cool?!"

"Uh… sure Heero, that was quite amazing. Now let me ask you another question. How did you feel after you drank the orange juice?" Doctor R cocked an eyebrow.

"I felt like… really cool. I was kinda drunk… Oh I know!!! I felt like I did when I stole some of Dorothy's pot! Man, that's some really good shit!" Heero hopped up onto an empty table and swung his legs back and forth. "I talked to Duo today. He's my friend. I like Duo. Do you like Duo?"

"Hai, Heero I Iike Duo." Doctor R decided to humor Heero to see where it led.

"Yeah… Duo's gotta braid. A cool braid. I wanna braid too. That way I can kill Relena. I'd have my head on a plaque and I'd be hero. Yeah, they'll make me a superhero… like… SuperHeero!!" Heero held up his hands like Superman. "And I'll fly and wear ever more spandex than I already do! Wouldn't that be cool?"

"That will be very cool." Doctor R nodded.

Heero looked at the doctor. "Can I ask you some questions?"

"Well… sure I guess."

Heero smiled. "Good! How old are you anyway?"

"That's Classified."

"Are you married?"

"Classified."

"You a virgin?"

"Classified."

Heero thought for a moment. "When reading a newspaper, what section do you look in for jobs?"

"Classified."

"Is the government hiding aliens?"

"Classified. Heero, your questions are getting way out of whack." Doctor R blinked. "I'm going to run some tests on you so lay down on the table and I'll bring in the other Doctors. Just count from 100 backwards."

"Ok. 100. 99. 98. This is so stupid. 96… 69… 69… 70. 69… heh heh…" Heero smirked and twitched in his seat. "69. 10. 9. 8. 7-6-5-4. 1. 69!" he looked around the table and the operating room. "Hey Doctor guys! I'm done!"

Heero then got up and walked out the back door just as Doctor R came back with the other Doctors.

"HEERO? WHERE'D YOU GO!?" Doctor S called out. Heero snickered and ran off to find Duo and the others.

~*~

Duo was talking to Quatre, Trowa and Wufei about Heero's condition when Heero himself showed up on the scene with a big smile on his face.

"Hi guys! Hi Duo Baby! Hi Fortune Cookie! Hi Gay Little Blonde Kid! Hi Mr. Dead Clown!" Heero danced around them and hugged Duo from behind.

"Hi Heero…" The four Pilots said in unison. Heero hugged Duo tighter.

"I missed you Duo Baby. Did you miss me? I like you. You're really cool. You gotta braid." Heero pulled Duo's braid lightly.

"ACK! Ow Heero! That hurt! And no I didn't miss you. You were gone for 10 minutes!" Duo scowled and held his head. Heero pouted.

"You're mean." He looked over at Quatre. "HI QUATRE!!!" Heero waved at him.

"Heero, I'm two feet away from you…" Quatre's face turned red.

"Why… so you are! I'm two feet away from you too! What a coincidence!" Heero grinned. "Come here, I'm gonna smack you."

"S-s-smack me?" Quatre winced. Trowa's muscles tensed.

"Yeah… smack you…" Heero grabbed Quatre's face and gave him a slobbery kiss on his eye. "There. You thought I was gonna hit you right? But I didn't cos I like you. You're cool."

Trowa let his muscles relax but still scooted closer to Quatre. "Heero, are you feeling alright?"

"I'm fine. I feel great. Really great. So great I could smack you, come here…" Heero took a step towards Trowa who did a triple backflip backwards and bowed before scooting further back. Heero pouted. "Fine then. I'll smack Wufei."

"NANI?!" Wufei blinked. Before he could move, Heero backhanded him across the face.

"Heh. You thought I was gonna kiss you… heh… kiss you…" Heero got a dreamy look on his face and turned to Duo. "Hi Duo!"

Duo winced and gave a little wave to Heero. "Hey Heero."

"Duo! Don't be mean!" Heero pouted.

"Mean? I'm not mean…" Duo looked down. "Am I mean?"

Heero looked at Duo. "No."

"But… you said I was."

"No I didn't. That's a figment of your ibaginamation."

"Ibaginamation? Don't you mean, Imagination?" Duo corrected him.

"That's what I said. Ibaginamation!" Heero grinned and smooshed Duo's cheeks together with his hands. "You're pretty."

"I'm pretty?" Duo's eyes widened.

"No."

"But…"

"You're sexy. Yeah. You know what I wanna do?" Heero grinned. Duo blinked uncertainly.

"Nani…"

"I wanna see you with no shirt on. I wanna get your heart and smoosh it in your braid. It'll be pretty. Really pretty. An then I wanna poke you with a stick and lick candy goo offa you. Yeah candy goo. Then it'll turn into sexy candy goo. Cos it came from a sexy Duo. Yeah. That's good. An then I wanna fix your hair in little braids. And then I can bake heart cookies with your heart. Your pretty pretty heart. Yeah… and we can dance like Madonna. That's good. That's what I wanna do… yeah… 69." Heero licked his lips.

Duo cocked an eyebrow. "69?"

"Yeah… you know what 69 is?" Heero smiled. "69 is 96… yeah… I'm hungry."

"Wufei's gotta place we can eat." Quatre suggested. "Let's all go there together!" Trowa shot Quatre a look of betrayal.

"Fo0o0o0od. I like food. It's yummy…yummy yummy food. I want some orange juice." Heero jumped up and down. "ORANGE JUICE! ORANGE JUICE!"

Duo put his hands on Heero's shoulders. "We'll get you some orange juice just calm down…"

"Wow Duo, you're so mature and cool. Gimme a backrub. I like backrubs. 'Specially by you." Heero stopped jumping up and down and moved his shoulders up and down as Duo gave him a backrub.

"Are we going to eat or not?" Wufei headed towards his Bar and Grill to help out Sally with the customers.

"Ok, let's eat. Eat's good. Yeah… fo0o0o0o0od… Trowie!! I wanna piggy back ride. You're strong, so gimme a piggy back ride!" Heero jumped on Trowa's back and Trowa reluctantly took Heero for a piggy back ride to the counter where they were able to eat.

"Ok, Heero what do you want to eat?" Quatre handed Heero a menu.

"I wanna meat stuffs. Like… pork an beef an chicken an turkey an lamb an goose!" Heero smiled thinking of all the food dancing around his head. Dorothy Catalonia came up to their small table and smirked.

"Hello, Heero. Where have you been these past days, hmm?" Dorothy flipped her hair back.

"Hiya Dorothy. I've been great, how about you? Wanna sit down an eat wif us?" Heero handed her a biscuit.

Dorothy took the biscuit hesitantly and stood shocked at Heero friendly greeting. "I-I-I guess I could eat with you guys…" She sat down, puzzled.

Duo and Quatre exchanged glances at each other and Trowa just… sat there. Heero was too busy talking to Dorothy to notice.

"Hey Dorothy?" Heero asked.

"Nani?"

"You have pretty hair. Can I play wif it?"

"Umm… sure Heero."

"Yay! I'm gonna braid it like Duo's He's got really pretty hair." Heero jumped up from his seat and grabbed a hunk of Dorothy's hair. "Now… we just put this over here… and this like this… and this goes thisa way… and THERE!" He handed Dorothy a mirror.

"OMG! HEERO! MY HAIR! WHAT DID YOU DO TO IT?!" Dorothy screamed and stood up. Heero had chopped half of her hair off and flipped the rest up into little red bows and braids.

"You look really pretty now. And I shaved your eyebrows too!" Heero smiled. "You so beeeeyooteeful!" He clapped his hands.

Dorothy choked between sobs and dashed out of the room. Heero looked up at Duo. "Did you like her hair?"

"Umm… it was …nice Heero." Duo reassured him.

Heero grinned and hugged Duo tight. "You're the best Duo I love you a lot!"

Duo calmly patted Heero on the head. "Hai Heero… I love you too."

Sally Po came up to the table with their orders. Trowa and Quatre had tea, Duo took a salad and Heero sat down with everything under the sun at his spot.

"WOW!" Heero said in between mouthfulls of food. "This is great stuff. Really yummyfull!"

Wufei stood nearby to await his compliments, for he, after all, was the chef. "Arigatou Mr. Yuy, I'm glad you like it."

Quatre and Trowa quietly sipped their tea and Duo looked longingly at Heero's steak that he was shoveling into his mouth.

"Um… Heero? Are you gonna finish that?" Duo indicated to the steak Heero looked up at him.

"Yeah."

"Oh.. ok I was just wondering…" Duo looked back to his measly salad. "You sur-" He was cut off by a big steak being shoved into his mouth.

"Eat up Ai Len!" Heero laughed and finished shoveling food into his mouth. Duo sat there, silently chewing his steak in happiness.

~*~

"Mr. Treize, that drug you put into Mr. Yuy's drink… about how long does it last?" Lady Une asked Treize from their hiding spot. They were watching Heero's actions from a distance.

"Just for a day, and he'll remember it all in the morning too." Treize smiled. "This was very refreshing to see so much smiling and laughter after such a long time, don't you think?"

"Yes, it is very refreshing Your Excellency." Lady Une agreed.

~*~

Duo had walked Heero up to his room after they were finished eating supper. They had had a long day at the pool and playing video games at the arcade. But alas it was that dreaded hour where the day must end and Heero was getting very tired.

Heero slumped into Duo's arms. "I like you Duo. You're really great. You're one of those people everyone can like. Can you sleep over wif me today? Pweez?" he looked up with pleading eyes at Duo.

"Well, sure, Heero. I will!" Duo smiled and opened Heero's door and together they walked in.

As Heero jumped into bed he asked Duo one last question. "Duo, whatcha think of me? Am I pretty too?"

"Yes, Heero. You're very pretty. And you're also very sexy. You're my best friend and-" he was cut off once more by Heero who had suddenly kissed Duo very passionately.

"I like you a lot Duo. You're pretty. But I'mma tired and I'mma gonna get me some sleep." Heero turned around and before he went to sleep whipspered to Duo quickly. "I love you too Duo. Cos… I can." And with that, his snores filled the room.

Duo looked up at the ceiling from Heero's bedroom. Sighing, he turned to face Heero's sleeping face. It had been foretold that when anyone sleeps he always looks younger. Heero seemed so much like a baby Duo could only put on a warm smile.

"I love you too Heero." Duo closed his eyes and fell asleep.

~*~

The next morning, Heero awoke to find Duo sleeping next to him. He was a bit shocked at first, but soon all his memories from the day before flooded into his head.

Heero grasped the sides of his head furiously. Why had he acted so? Heero's sudden movement had awakened Duo from his sleep.

"Eh, Heero? Why are you up so early?" Duo rolled over to see Heero in agony. "GAH! Heero! What's wrong?"

Heero glanced over at Duo, wincing. "What did I do yesterday?'

"I dunno, but it was sure fun. I mean, you should act like that more often, it really felt good because there was so much laughter." Duo shrugged.

Heero thought about that. He was the cause of so much good times around that place? This was highly unusual, and yet, he felt that he hadn't served his purpose yet, there was still a lot of things he had to do with his life. No use in ending it now. And besides, Duo needed him. Hadn't he said he loved him once yesterday? Heero looked over to Duo once more.

"You know, I'm not doped up anymore Duo. So you can leave now." Heero got up and went over to the window.

Duo followed Heero's movements with his eyes. "You mean that's it? You don't ever care about me anymore. I'm not pretty. You don't like me. And you probably don't even like braids." Duo got up angrily and stormed out the door.

Heero continued to look out the window, unchanged. Something on the street corner caught his eye. Dorothy Catalonia was at the street corner kissing with her newest boyfriend. Normally, Heero wouldn't put much mind into it, but this time his heart softened a little.

Quietly and surely, Heero stepped towards Duo's room and knocked on the door. There was a quiet and muffled "Go away!" But Heero was persistent. He turned the doorknob and opened the door to find Duo sprawled out on his bed.

"Duo, it's me." Heero took a step into the room. Duo looked up. His eyes were slightly red and puffy.

"What do you want?" Duo sat at the edge of his bed.

"Listen Duo," Heero took a deep breath. "I'm really sorry if I hurt your feelings, I don't know… but I've changed… see?" Heero held out his arms and slowly brought the corners of his mouth to a smile.

Duo's eyes widened and he immediately flew into Heero's arms and they embraced for a moment, which to both of them seemed like forever.

~*~

In another room not too far away…

"Goooooooood Morning Quatre! The sky is blue. An it's so pretty! Pretty blue… like your eyes. I love your eyes Quatre. And your hair! I wish mine was like that! It's so beeyooteefull! I like you a lot Quatre. We should do what we did last night more often!" Trowa sang.

Quatre blushed deeply. "Trowa hun…. Keep it down…"

owari