-Disclaimer: I do not own Megami Kouhosei or any of the characters mentioned here!

-Rates: PG-13, mild language, hentai hints, bad humor

-Notes: Yipee! I knew I was messed up enough to write this. This isn't my first MK fic, of course, but my first MK fic on FF.net. XD I figured I'd separate this into part 1, commercials, and part 2. ^.^ That way I can figure out what questions to ask! I might have overdone Rio's stupidity, and the ending should either be a surprise or an I-told-ya-so. It depends on the person. XD

Mystery Date!

[Fly to the Star of Your Dreams music launches out all about the stage. Standing on a podium in a tuxedo is none other than Aracd. There are cameras everywhere and a giant heart chair to the right of the stage. In cubicles that only the studio audience can see inside, are three smaller heart chairs. In these chairs are three people. The music ends and the audience cheers.]

Aracd: Konbanwa, minna-san! I am your host, Aracd, and welcome to Mystery Date!

Audience: ::cheers::

Aracd: May I introduce our three candidates for love!!

[The audience applauds as Candidate #1's box lights up.]

Aracd: Please state your name. And remember your mystery date cannot hear what you say until he comes out on stage.

Rio: Watashi wa Rioroute Vilgyna desu. Demo… where's the buffet? Phil told me there was food here!

Aracd: Um… this is a dating service!

Rio: You mean it's not a cooking show?

Aracd:… no.

Rio: Aw, damn! ::folds his arms:: Well, here goes nothing…

Aracd: O…K… Anyway. Candidate #2!

Yamagi: ::whispers:: How much money am I getting paid for this again?

Aracd: We'll discuss that later.

Yamagi: Right. ::clears his throat:: Ahem. Yamagi Kushida desu.

Aracd: And Candidate #3!

Wrecka: ::giggles:: Hi-mi-tsu!

Aracd: Just introduce yourself.

Wrecka: ::sighs:: Watashi no name wa Wrecka Toesing.

Aracd: Now that we know who our Candidates are, let's bring out our contestant! Everyone, meet Roose Sawamura!

[Roose steps out on stage as the audience cheers. Of course, now the candidates know whom they're battling for.]

Yamagi: ::spits out his tea:: Roose? ::blushing furiously now:: I thought it would be like… Tune or something.

Rio: Aw, T.T He's too young for me!

[Wrecka doesn't say anything and Roose gets comfortable in the giant heart chair.]

Aracd: Konbanwa Roose, Yoroshiku.

Roose: Ne, yoroshiku, Aracd-san!

Aracd: I guess I shall have to explain the rules. All right. Roose, you will ask the three candidates a couple of questions, and at the end of our time limit, choose your date!

Roose: That sounds simple… um, when can I start?

Aracd: Now, if you want.

Roose: OK. ::blushing like a maniac now, he picks up a few note cards:: Umm… I recently lost a lot of… of weight. I-I'm looking for… for someone who shares m-my thoughts on eating right and… and health. What are your v- views?

Aracd: OK! Candidate #1!

Rio: ::stomach growls:: I'm so hungryyyyyyyyyyy! I need a giant greasy hamburger smothered in gravy!

Aracd: Ummm… OK… Candidate #2!

Yamagi: What was the question?

Roose: What are your views on eating right and health?

Yamagi: Oh. :;pause:: I can't be a pilot unless I eat right. And I have to beat Zero!

Zero: ::in the audience:: Shut up!

Aracd: And Candidate #3!

Wrecka: ::giggles:: I'm an expert when it comes to dieting. I believe that eating right is the way everyone should be.

Aracd: Wow. She seems to really share your views. How are you feeling, Roose?

Roose: ::shaking like a frightened puppy:: F-fine…

Aracd: Alright, Roose! Next question!

Roose: Um… um, right. ::fumbles through his cards::

Rio: Aw, man! I gotta pee!

Wrecka: Ew, that's disgusting!

Rio: Hey, it's not my fault! I just had one too many glasses of tea!

Yamagi: Dude, you're a yag.

Rio: Shut up!

Aracd: Back to the game!

Roose: Right, um… If you had a million dollars what would you do?

Aracd: Candidate #1?

Rio: Buy a bunch of food.

Aracd: Yes, we all saw that one coming. Candidate #2?

Yamagi: I would… buy me… a car?

Rio: What's a car?

Yamagi: Shut up, yag! I'd buy me a… aw hell, I'd squander it.

Aracd: Right. Candidate #3!

Wrecka: I'd give a bunch to charities and weight loss programs. Then I'd spend the rest on our adorable Roose.

[Audience 'aws']

Aracd: Wow, Roose. You'd really have a great time with Candidate #3!

Roose: H…hai.

Aracd: Roose, are you ready for your next question?

Rio: Can I go pee now?

Yamagi: No, shut up.

Rio: Aww…

Roose: A…all right. ::looks at his cards:: What was the worst thing you've ever done?

Aracd: Oo… time to bring out the ugliness. Candidate #1!

Rio: I ate a salad once.

Aracd: That's the worst thing you've ever done?

Rio: Umm… yeah.

Yamagi: Baka.

Aracd: Moving on! I swear this is my worst episode yet, I'm going to talk to the editor about this Anyway! Candidate #2!

Yamagi: I had sex with Hiido once.

Wrecka: Oh, that's so disgusting! Y-

Aracd: Ah-ah-ah-… no saying the name of another candidate. It gives away the surprise.

Wrecka: G-gomen ne…

Aracd: Yes, Candidate #2, I can see why that would be the worst thing you've ever done.

Hiido: ::calls out from studio audience.:: I resent that! He knows he liked it!

Yamagi: Up yours, Hiido!

Hiido: Gladly!

Aracd: Don't make me get out the bodyguards!

[Force and Sure crack their knuckles.]

Wrecka: Is it my turn yet?

Aracd: Yes, I was getting to that… Candidate #3!

Wrecka: One time, I stayed up 15 minutes past my bedtime… to read a book!

[Audience gasps.]

Aracd: Well, we're not all perfect, are we? Roose, one more question before a commercial break! How are you feeling?

Roose: ::wipes his forehead:: I'm not so nervous anymore.

Aracd: That's good. Can you give the candidates their next question?

Roose: Hai. Hypothetically speaking, if we were going out and got caught in the rain, what would you do?

Aracd: Ah, the possibilities for this question! All right, Candidate #1!

Rio: Why would we be going out?

Roose: It's hypothetical! ::blush blush::

Rio: And… the rain?

Roose: Artificial of course.

Rio: Hm… I'd ask you if you had any food. Man, all this talk of rain is making me have to pee even more!

Aracd: You can during the commercial break. Candidate #2!

Yamagi: XD Eh..heh..heh..

Roose: O.O! That doesn't sound good…

Aracd: Yes, yes, to keep this PG-13, let's move on to Candidate #3!

Yamagi: How is this PG-13? This should be PG!

Aracd: You had sex with Hiido.

Yamagi: Yu did? I never knew…

Aracd: Not Yu, you!

Yamagi: Oh. ::rolls his eyes:: Right.

Aracd: Can we please move on to Candidate #3?

Yamagi: Yeah, sure.

Aracd: Yoshi! Candidate #3!… again.

Wrecka: ::giggle:: I would try my best to find shelter so we could stay dry Then cuddle for warmth.

Roose: ::blushing even more furiously:: I shouldn't have asked that question.

Aracd: That's alright. That's what makes this game so entertaining! But enough small talk. We're halfway through! That means, it's time for a commercial break!

Rio: Yay! Can I pee now?

Aracd: Yes, and with all this talk of pee, I think I need to relieve myself. It will be a wonder if half our viewing population goes off to dispose of their waste during the commercials. Don't touch that dial!

[Fly to the Star of your Dreams comes on again briefly as the scene fades.]

--

XD There! Part 1. If you have any commercial ideas or questions, please include them in your review! Puh-leeeeeeeeeeeese! It makes it more fun to be interactive. Arigatou!