Disclaimer: I do not own Pokémon or anything mentioned that could possibly have a copyright in this horribly fic.

Authoress Notes: I wrote this... a very long time ago and I just found it today so I decided to put it on ff.net. ^.^ It's a lot more funny If you knew about the certain voice I have for pikachu. It's a bit of a retarded redneck type thing... Anyway, please, don't mind the slang. It's supposed to show the stupidity. Alrighty?


A Day in the Life of Pikachu

Hi my name is Pikachu. I sat in the sun, now I'm Pika-goo. When I wake up in the morning, I yawn and stretch in my cage. I never been outside my cage before. If I did, I don't remember, because my master tells me not to. I dunno who my master is either. Alls I know that somehow my water bottle gets filleded up and a magic hand pours food in my pika-bowl.

I needa wake up so I run on my pika-wheel. One time, I fink I actually made it to China. But then I got tired and hadda run back. So, I run and run and run and I get tired again so I try an' make the wheel stop. I grab onto it with my pika-claws and I ended spinning around and around on the wheel. This makes me dizzy so I fly off and upchuck.

Now I'm hungry, so I go an eat some food. But, first, I gotta sniff my peepee. My peepee smells a lot like my food, but I don't eat it. I hearded that eating peepee will make you healfy. An being healfy is bad, because you don't sneeze. And I like to sneez. One time I sneezed really hard and the pika-fur on my back all roseded up like a petunia.

Now I gotta getta drink because sniffing peepee makes me thirsty. So I go over an try to getta drink from my waterbottle, but the stupid little ball thing insulted my big teef. Now I gotta make 'em little again.

So I gnaw on my piece of wood. Only, I try not to get any in my eye this time, because that really hurts. An I dun wanna scream "OUCHIES" On the top of my lungs anymore.

After I getta drink. I hafta go an explore my domain thingy. It never really changes, unless my master makes it. At least once a week, I gotta make everything my home all over again, and once I like my new house the way it is, my master goes and cleans in and changes it all over again. And I don't like that, so I bite him. One time, he thought he had rabies and someone hadda give me a shot in the butt. I dunno why they gave one to me, when he's the dude wif rabies.

I climb up and around in my little pika-tunnels. They smell like my poop. I like my poop. I can't turn around in them really good so I run all the way through the tunnels until I get to the lookout tower. I stop and looks at the view. It's so perdyful! But then I'm afraid the Pidgey on the other side of the room sees me and I make a peepee on the floor. So then I hafta run all the way down again and I plop at the bottom of my cage.

Now I run around and hop in my shavings. They're made of wood too and they scratch my butt a lot. My master then plops some fresh carrots and pika-food into my bowl and I run over and started nibbling on it.

I spit the carrot out really fast because it tastes icky. I then rummage through the fresh food until I get to my hard pika-food mix. Ahah! Sesame seeds! These are the bestest because I crack them open to eat the shells. I save the insides in a corner. But once I get a good collection of them, my master cleans it all up again and they go bye bye.

I can tell when it gets to be night time because my eyes hurt and I don't have lossa energies. So I climb into my little pika-box and snuggle into the tissues. After going into a sneezing fit, I finally fall asleep to my pika-dreams.

Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night and realize something. I forgot to play checkers with myself!

The End J

A Day in the Life of Pikachu

Was brought to you by

The brilliant mind of:

Kitzaku-san

After a long road trip on

12-1-01

"YUP YUP YUP!"