Just give me a second darling
To clear my head
Just put down those scissors baby, on this single bed
Let's get one thing clear. I didn't want to leave her. Not now, not ever. I knew that deep in my heart that I must though. Soon. I was glad to have this last night with her however.
The sand in the hourglass is running low
I came through thunder, the cold wind
The rain and the snow
What I felt was impossible. I shouldn't be having feelings and emotions such as this. All I should be able to feel is rage, hate, pain and a sense of revenge. Not love, happiness, joy. A golem, spectre, ghost, call me what you will. The fact remains the same. A creature such as me, being able to feel these things. The very notion is indeed laughable. But, have these feelings and emotions I did and knowing that my love felt the same caused joy to bloom throughout me.
To find you awake by your windowsill
A sight for sore eyes and a view to kill
I gazed at her sleeping form as the firelight steadily faded. Oh Dice, my creator, my love. I reached out to gently trace the features of her face and I noticed that my hand trembled. Damn these feelings, filling me up until soon I wouldn't be able to contain them. Soon they would over power me and I would cease to exist on this astral plane. She wouldn't be alone though. Never alone again. Even when she was no longer able to see me. Even when we could no loner touch or hold each other I'd be with her. Always. And with her special gift, she'd always know I was with her and that I loved her. Even when I no longer had a body- a mouth- to speak with.
I broke down in horror at you standing there
The glow from the moon
Shone through cracks in your hair
I wished for more time as I gazed at Dice. Watching her breathe, watching her dream. This world was a cruel place. Giving Dice and I each other only to rip us apart after such a short time together.
I shouted with passion,
"I love you so much"
She tossed her head lightly, halting my bitter thoughts. Her dark curls that I loved so much shimmered and flickered with an orange tint. She was so beautiful, if only I had enough time left to make her see it. I wanted to close my eyes and join her in slumber but, I was scared. Scared that when I next awoke she would no longer be able to see me. So instead of slipping into that blissful abyss, I just wrapped my arms around her and held her close for as long as I could. As long as I had arms to hold her with. As she unconsciously snuggled closer, I began to think.
But feeling my skin, it was cold to the touch.
You whispered "where are you?"
I questioned your doubt
But soon realised, you were talking to God now
Firstly I thought about Hannah. My first love but, not in fact my true love. No my true love was Dice and I was glad that everything happened because it brought me to her. Even though people died and I was murdered I was glad. Sure, with Dice I couldn't have a life with her. I couldn't grow old with her or give her children but, I could wait for her and then we could be together forever. I wondered if I would see Hannah again after I left this place. It would be nice to talk to her once more and tell her that I was sorry. She no longer held my heart though and I wasn't her Sinclair anymore. I had become a new person. I had become Dice's Sin.
Next I thought about Pen. Poor innocent Pen. I regretted what I did to her not because of her as a person but because I knew I hurt Dice when I destroyed Pen. I was done thinking about them though. My time was running out and I needed to tell my angel goodbye.
You've got blood on your hands
And I know it's mine
I just need more time
I brushed the hair back from her forehead and leaned in brushing a kiss against her cheekbone. Then again her eye. Next her ear where I whispered her name softly.
"Dice"
There was no response.
So I kissed her lips and breathed her name out again. A little louder.
"Dice."
This time I got a reaction. Her eyes fluttered open and I saw violet. So stunning and beautiful that it made my heart ache. They revealed her soul inside. She wasn't fully awake though and she wouldn't remember this at all. It would have to do though, I had no time left.
"Goodbye Dice. My love. I will wait for you forever. One day we will meet again and please remember that you won't be alone. I will always be with you. Remember that. I love you. Always."
She had fallen fully back to sleep before I had finished talking but, now a smile lit her dreaming features. Illuminating her face and enhancing her beauty. An ache in my chest began and it was radiating through my body.
So get off your low and let's dance like we used to
But there's a light in the distance
Waiting for me, I will wait for you
So get off your low and let's kiss like we used to
The feelings were wild now. Out of control. My heart pounding, my breath coming out in short gasps. I wasn't in pain though. Strangely enough I felt at peace. Something wet ran down my face and I was astonished to find that it was tears. I was crying. I smiled and began to laugh quietly. Life is so full of surprises. I felt so good. Suddenly a quiet whisper cut through the thick air and grabbed my attention fully.
"Sin... Love... Forever." Dice whispered before she was unconscious again.
I looked in the mirror
But something was wrong.
I saw you behind but my reflection was gone.
I felt so alive. Everything was okay. I knew it would be just like I knew it was time to go. I could feel it. The tingle that started in my fingers and moved throughout my body until it had reached my toes. Then I felt like a firecracker of emotions.
There was smoke in the fireplace
As white as the snow.
A voice beckoned gently
'Now it's time to go'
"Goodbye Dice." I whispered. My voice almost inaudible.
A requiem played as you begged for forgiveness
"Don't touch me!" I screamed
"I've got unfinished business"
It was then that the emotions flickered and died and I felt nothing. Absolutely nothing at all. I closed my eyes and felt myself fading away. My time was up. The dark abyss dragged me under and when I surfaced I opened my eyes. It was like looking through a veil. I could still see her. I could still sense her and hear her, I could still watch her but, I could no longer speak to or touch her. It was like a misty shield was around me that I couldn't break through.
You've got blood on your hands
And I know it's mine
I just need more time
I watched her wake up and start her day. Watched her as she understood that I was gone and not coming back. I watched her face fall and then lift in a smile. She knew I was still there with her. She knew and I was glad that she could see it.
So get off your low and let's dance like we used to
The veil was in place for now but, one day it would be gone and we could be together. I turned my back on the light filled arch that would take me away so that I could wait for her. I had waited centuries for her and a few more decades would be manageable. She was mine and I was hers. Forever.
But there's a light in the distance
Waiting for me, I will wait for you
So get off your low, and let's kiss like we used to
No, I didn't want to leave her. Not now and not ever but, in the end I had to. Not by choice but by feelings. By gaining a soul. By falling in love.
I looked in the mirror but something was wrong. I saw you behind but my reflection was gone/ There was smoke/ As white as the snow/ I just need more time/ "Now it's time to go"/ There's a light in the distance. Waiting for me, I will wait for you/ "I love you so much"/.
So that was my take on Sins POV for the last chapter of Swoon. I hope you guys liked it. The song I used was Unfinished Business by white Lies. I do plan on finishing Light up the Sky I just need to fix more other labtop first where it's stored. Love ya'll.
